How do I break up with my girlfriend? I have no backbone.

>The respectable thing
Take her somewhere public but away from other people, explain to her why the relationship isn't working anymore, bear the brunt of her reaction to the news, and leave separately

>The shitty thing
Write her a long text, chat message, or email, explaining in detail why the relationship isn't working anymore, and refuse to answer the phone when she inevitably calls

>The cruel thing
Become a gradually more distant and shitty boyfriend, deliberately going against her expectations and hurting her, until she is forced to break up with you instead

>The absolute scumbag thing
Ghost her.

Choose OP. What kind of person do you want to be?

say you have a drug problem and need time to go over it

say you are gay

>>18693529
oh jeez, I know how you feel.
first realize that at the end it's not that bad and realize that you should better end it now because
1. you don't want to keep the entire thing in bad memory
2. It's incredibly selfish to not love someone but keeping a relationship with them. you are locking her u basically.

She might, and if she loves you, cry and you will feel shitty and maybe at the ending moments you might feel love with for her again but don't let yourself get fooled by that. If you have no intention to work on the relationship and try to fall in love again, it's all for naught anyways.

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71KB, 900x675px

>>18693544
>tfw you're trying to do the Cruel Thing, but she is just one big fat glutton so you eventually have to do the respectable thing

>>18693529
First off, don't listen to this guy: >>18693544

For two important reasons. First, there's NO good way to break up. It's not possible. Saying there's a "respectable" way is him (or her) just instilling their weird personal opinions upon you when your girlfriend may have an entirely opposite set of beliefs. Maybe your girlfriend would rather be ghosted than have to endure a conversation. Who knows?

Second, and more importantly: they're using shame tactics to illicit action. This is a strategy that has been well-understood and abused for millennia to convince men to act in a certain way, and it's important to recognize them so you can protect yourself from impulsive action on someone else's behalf. Implying that you "aren't a real man" unless you do X, Y, or Z is an attempt to undermine your personal identity. You'll notice when people are using shame tactics because they always tell you what to do but never tell you how to do it, instead just threatening you with what will happen if you don't do it.

Before breaking up with your girlfriend, there are two things I think you should do. First, make sure you actually understand WHY you want to break up. Not just "because it's not working". That's too vague and meaningless. What isn't working? Why isn't it working? Can it be made to work? If not, why not? You not only save yourself the trouble of having answers to these questions when she inevitable asks them, but you will discover a lot about yourself in the process of trying to develop answers on your own.

Next, imagine the life you plan on having after your girlfriend. Not 20 years after when you're married with kids. I mean the next week. What is your goal? What are you aiming for? This will help bolster your answer to the previous question, and it will settle your resolve to end the relationship if you truly feel like you're moving to a better place as a result. It will also make it that much easier to walk away after breaking up.

>>18693529
Its easier than you think.

Takes literally one moment.
Just start the conversation/say the thing you need to say to communicate its over. Be forward and direct. No games. Bill Burr had a joke "like breaking up with a girl, look at her and say "im.not happy" and just stay in it."

Then step two, cut communication. Ignore all texts and emails. Get forward with your life.


Pro tip from a psychfag:

Youre literally addicted to her. Thats how relationships work because chemicals. Breakups are basically heroine withdrawal. This is going to feel terrible for awhile. Your brain will say you fucked up and you need her back. Thats its tricks to get its fix again.

Advil actually takes the edge off of those feels. Theyre chemical in nature so of course there is a chemical that helps. Advil. Take the advil.

>>18693529
This fag again: >>18693568

I've personally had a very strange dating life. One girl who I never saw naked over a three year relationship but told all of my friends that she thinks about them when she masturbates (and never told me this). One girl who wanted to hang out and watch movies ALL the time, but when I put my hand on her waist once she went home and her father called me that night threatening my life. One girl who actually raped me (sexual intercourse without my consent, against my will, and continued to do so through my protests -- but I was afraid to use physical force to stop her because society had convinced me that hitting a woman was never right and I'd go to jail if I tried to stop her). And one girl who killed herself because I refused to go out with her after she said she'd kill herself if I refused to go out with her, to which I responded "that's not the right reason to date someone and I can't handle that kind of pressure, sorry."

So I can't really tell you what a "normal" breakup is supposed to look like, but I CAN give you advice to make it easier.

And the biggest piece of advice I can give you is to focus on YOU. I'm not saying be a selfish dick. I'm saying figure out what you want and respectfully make that clear, and explain why you can't get what you'd like from the current relationship. She's a big girl, she can take care of herself. You don't need to worry yourself with making this as easy and painless as possible for her. Let her handle making it easy and painless for her. Your job is to make it easy and painless for you, and more importantly, to be sure you can live with your decision.

Also, and this is just a personal lesson I learned and you may disagree with it,... keep any nudes. I deleted every picture I had of my ex girlfriends and I regret it to this day. Don't share them with anyone else, but from time to time you'll want to glance at them. And you'll be glad you have them.