ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

>>18692230
What does your bf do that makes you excited to be with him?

>>18692230
Girls, Tell me your sex fantasy

>>18692264
Cucking you.

>>18692248
Like - while we're fucking? Or about him as a person?

So basically I suggested this girl I was seeing to come over for a second time. However she has class in the morning and didn't want to deal with doing a bunch of shit in the morning. So she suggested the following day instead, however I work that night. And the other night im free she is going out of town. So basically I told her I'd see her next week then and she seemed super disappointed. Should I just text her back saying that I can pick her up the day she suggested but it will be later at night?

>>18692289
hahaahahahah

>>18692346
Both

>>18692346
Between meeting and fucking

Girls and guys

How do I stop thinking about girls? It's creating me a lot of stress.

I try to stay pretty busy between working fulltime and being a fulltime student. But any moment of free time I have (driving, getting ready for bed, etc..) all I can think about is GIRLS. It's been like this for years and makes my chest ache sometimes. Getting a girlfriend isn't going to happen. So I wish I could just stop these thoughts

>>18692397
>Getting a girlfriend isn't going to happen.

Why? Also, the fact that you need to say this makes me believe you put a lot of stock or importance on getting a GF. I've been single my whole life, and I'm not joking. Even so I don't think about girls 24/7 and I don't have a constant rush to get a GF. Sure, the idea gets in my head when I meet a cute girl and shit. But it's not a constant source of suffering.

I think you need to come to terms with dating, and realize it doesn't matter so much. As long as you keep putting so much value in it, you won't stop thinking about it.

>>18692264
Inserting penis inside vagina.

>>18692230
What are some things about girls that are not told to boys by anyone but girls expect us to know them?

>>18692413

I wouldn't be a good boyfriend. I wouldn't wrong her in anyway, but I wouldn't be able to do all the emotional connection shit. I literally can't imagine myself having a girlfriend.

I've been single my whole life as well. I'm 27. Hell, I've only had sex once before. Although the reason for it not happening again is by my own choice but that doesn't matter. I think about girls so much because I'm a healthy male. So I guess that's just instinct. But I know that I'm not meant for one. I accept that too. But fuck, I just wish these thoughts would stop

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Girls

How do you deal with a boyfriend who is deep into anime/video game girls? My boyrfriend and I both enjoy gaming and I have seen my fair share of animated tv shows and movies (he isn't into anime). But eventhough I understand the culture that comes with it, and I get thinking a fictional woman can be cute, I still find it hard to stomach him masturbating to the same 2d woman again and again. Even going as far as complimenting women who cosplay as the characters he likes in public. How do I learn to ignore it? I feel like there's something he's unsatisfied about with me because he never calls me hot or sexy but has no trouble saying that about these images of woman.

>>18692443
>But I know that I'm not meant for one. I accept that too.

Yeah, you can't really accept you are "not good enough" without it affecting you. As long as you equate getting a GF with your worth, you will keep having these thoughts.

>>18692375
>>18692382
Dude, I frankly don't understand what you are asking.

>>18692451

So what am I suppose to do?

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Girls, let's say a random stranger smiles at you. Would you take this as a flirt? Would he come off as autistic or a creep? You are not attracted to said stranger.

>>18692458

You need to find a way to separete your worth as a person from the fact that you have (or don't have) a GF.

>>18692474

I don't understand. I mean, I do a lot of things. I just got my Private pilots license yesterday and I'm planning on getting my scuba diver certification in a few months. I do unique things that not many people do. When I'm talking with people about those things I don't give a shit about girls. But when I'm not doing anything. All I think about is girls.

>>18692466
>Would you take this as a flirt?
It depends
>Would he come off as autistic or a creep?
No

>>18692500
>I know that I'm not meant for one.

You said this. You are telling me you want a GF, but you don't think you can have a relationship. Isn't that right?

Well, if you want to date, you have to try. Until you really understand whether or not you really want to, you have to work on it. And you don't work on it by avoiding it.

>>18692505

>You are telling me you want a GF, but you don't think you can have a relationship. Isn't that right?

incorrect. I don't want a girlfriend. In my mind, I can not see a reason or justification to get a girlfriend. But at the same time, I keep thinking about girls

>>18692517
>I keep thinking about girls

What does this mean, then? If you don't think about them for dating purpouses, what do you do? Have a quick fap and go to sleep?

>>18692521

It's not even really sexual thoughts. Like, sometimes I just think it would be nice to hug with a cute girl.

>>18692525
>sometimes I just think it would be nice to hug with a cute girl.

Why?

>>18692530

I don't really know.

I just remember one time, I took a vacation abroad. I became friends with a very cute local girl and we ended up becoming pretty close friends. She even told me she liked me. When it was time for me to depart, she ran up to me and gave me a really big, warm, long hug. It felt nice, and that was the first and only time that has ever happened to me before

>>18692541

So what does that hug mean to you?

>>18692541
>>18692544
so excited to see where this goes but i honestly think hes just another guy who wants women but doesn't know how to get them, so he just tries to forget them.

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>>18692248
Stays with me even when I'm not having sex with him.
That's just theoretical though, have yet to meet someone who doesn't just kick me out of his bed after he cums.
>tfw no bf just fwb

>>18692544

That's a hard question Tbh, because I don't know how to answer questions like that

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>>18692264
held down/tied up, becoming his sex doll with little power over what he does to me. Meanwhile he's a cocky bastard who bullies me for my reactions, and reminds me how no matter how much I pretend to be a sweet innocent girl I'm really a dirty fucking slut who's only purpose is to make him happy

>>18692557

Well, I think you want a gril to validate you. I said so above. Maybe I'm right, maybe I'm wrong.

You are the only one that can tell what you want. So I suggest you do some soul searching and find out what it is that you want with girls.

>>18692552

I'm the guy you're talking about. And no, you're wrong. I really believe I shouldn't have a girlfriend. I see a relationship as an investment. But that's something I can justify putting my time into just for it to fail.

But, I'm easily social. As long as I'm comfortable around people I can talk with anyone about anything. I'm liked by everyone at work, ages from 22-55 years old. So it's not a social issue. I know if I wanted to meet girls, I'd have to go places where girls can be found. I just choose to not do that

>>18692555
>get

yo i'm not a /pol/ type but this literally makes you a ho lol. consider you can't find a bf because you put out so easily to non-bfs.

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Why do Indian guys do this?

>>18692563

>I suggest you do some soul searching and find out what it is that you want with girls

God dammit. This has been an on-going thing for at least the past 2 years

>>18692568

If you haven't reached a conclusion yet, then keep going.

>>18692349
Yeah, its rough when your schedules conflict so much. If you're willing, and only if you're willing, to stay up and spend time with her after a long day of work then go for it. It'll definitely be a good sign to her, because again it will show you're willing to compromise/put more effort into seeing her (Like she should appreciate that you're interested enough in her to hang out despite being tired from working or something. Or at least I would be hella impressed lol) But, since she's not willing to do the same, since she won't just meet you in the morning despite being a slight inconvenience to her, thats why I say only do it if you're willing.

But otherwise, just say something like "sorry our schedules are so conflicting, but I promise I really do wanna meet up and as soon as we're both opened up I'll make sure it happens"

>>18692289
>>18692560

wow, how creative.

don't cry when we cheat on you because you are boring and standardized

>>18692567
indians have a serious female shortage. about 15% of their population is incel guys, just because there aren't enough women to pair up with over there, even before competition.

just imagine the effects this has on people.

>>18692572

This is going to last into my 30s.

Well, thanks for trying

>>18692397
I feel you ;-; Same boat, opposite genders. All I've ever wanted and the only thing that's ever made me feel truly happy or successful was having a bf. I tried distracting myself with school, work, friends, hobbies, even trying to replace a romantic partner with a casual sex partner because often I'm told I just need to get laid and then I won't want a bf anymore, but at the end of the night when I go home to my empty bed knowing nobody's ever gonna care about me or love me like that, I feel dead inside.

I don't have an answer, I wish I did, but I hope we find it some day anon.

>>18692447
You either deal or learn you're just incompatible and move on.

But, first things first, open your mouth and talk about it girl.
>I feel like there's something he's unsatisfied about with me because he never calls me hot or sexy but has no trouble saying that about these images of woman.
Tell him this in particular. Bc this isn't exactly about his hobbies or anime, its about you feeling unappreciated. Tell him you'd appreciate if he showed you his love a bit more often bc right now you're uncertain on his feelings towards you.

>>18692582

Read this: >>18692474

Just turn GF into BF in that last part.

>>18692466
Nope, it's normal for people to smile at one another, it just a common social construct to show you're not hostile. You're overthinking it, people smile and say hello casually to strangers all the time. It doesn't mean anything.
He'd seem more autistic and creepy if he just stared at me with an angry/deadpan face as he walked by me. Rule of thumb, if you make eye contact with someone, even accidentally, you smile at them and move on.

>>18692582

Actually we are different. I don't want a girlfriend. Like, consciously I don't want one. But my body makes me think about girls because I'm a healthy male, which in turn confuses me and makes me feel like shit. I don't do casual sex because I don't believe in it even though I am not religious

>>18692574
It's not that she won't meet me, she literally cant because she doesn't have a car and lives on campus. I don't mind going out of my way for people I like. I used to drive 40 mins to and 40 mins back at 1am in the morning to pick up this girl I was dating. We always had a great time together. But that is a whole other story.

desu I think she is ditching her class today just to hang out with me lol.

>>18692566
I understand that perception, but believe me I've tried every other route there is. Nothing works, because that's just how the majority of college aged guys are now. They don't want commitment, they want sex.

>Go on first date
>Don't put out
>Never get called again

>go on first date
>put out
>Get to at least spend more than a couple hours with him
>never get called again.

Either way, I'm never getting contacted because that's all they actually want from me, but at least when I put out my night doesn't end at 8pm

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>>18692578
>kink shaming on 4chan

>>18692588
idk how though. All the advice that's ever been given to me on how to do that hasn't worked. At the end of the day I still just want to devote myself to a man.

>>18692592
>But my body makes me think about girls

Your body is you. If fapping doesn't solve it, then don't blame biology. Until you admit you are doing this to yourself and not an external force, you will not be able to solve this issue. Take responsibility for your own life and feelings.

>>18692587
>Tell him you'd appreciate if he showed you his love a bit more often

Done that about a month ago or so. He responded with something along the lines of: ''So my compliments have expiration dates on them?''. At this point I don't know how to get it through to him that he needs to voice what he feels to me. Which again is weird to me because he has no problem if its directed at some pixels at the screen.

>>18692602
>I still just want to devote myself to a man.

Why?

>>18692606

But it is biology. I'm a 27 year old mostly /fit/ male who eats right. My body is healthy, which in turn produces more sex hormones. Because natural instinct is to mate and reproduce. So it's absolutely biology..

>>18692610
>Because natural instinct is to mate and reproduce.

Yet, you said:

>It's not even really sexual thoughts.

I think there's something deeper than just biology.

Girls, how would you feel if you found out that your bf enjoy watching gay porn?

>>18692613

Right. I don't really care about sex as I said. But, part of those sex hormones is attachment to people since we are social animals. Therefor, I think of hugs with cute girls

>>18692595
haha i'm sorry about your experience, and what you say is really true, but you're definitely a ho.

Went on a few dates with a very conservative girl. Everything seemed to be going well, we were planning to do things together for a few months down the line. I got her flowers, etc. I was being quite obvious that I was in it romantically. She seemed into me as well.

Yesterday we went out by the docks overlooking the city and I asked her to be my gf because everything seemed to be going well.

She didn't say yes but didn't say no either.

In my mind this means that she is not quite interested. I invited her over this Saturday for home made sushi and will take her kayaking in the afternoon.

I'm not sure if I should press her or not, find someone else, etc. i don't know if I will be interested in just being friends.

>>18692615
Fine

>>18692617
>Therefor, I think of hugs with cute girls

No. You are deflecting responsibility. Freud said we are responsible even on our dreams. Our subconscious is a part of us.

You are not maniacally masturbating because you are sexually frustrated. You are desperate for a sign of approval or maybe for a connection. That's why you want what you had with that girl, a simple hug.

You can't disassociate yourself from your own wishes and wants. You have to take responsibility for them if you ever expect to have any control over your own life.

>>18692608
It makes me happy helping other people, and especially so in that very specific intimate romantic relationship. I've never even come close to that happiness doing anything else. I've got a 3.8 GPA that I couldn't care less about, getting good grades is just expected and not an accomplishment, it's just like breathing. I've been employee of the month at my job a couple times, but again, being good at your job is just expected. It's unworthy of praise or admiration, anyone can do it. I've gotten awards for my artwork in the past, but I don't see those as accomplishments either. I volunteered at a couple different places, I had a woman cry on her knees thanking me for helping rebuild her house after a tornado, but that didn't really make me feel accomplished either, everyone should help one another out in a time of need like that.

But when I see a girl walking around a grocery store with her boyfriend, I think "wow what a successful person"
When I was with my last boyfriend, I felt successful, like I really was doing something right and good. Like I knew my place in the world. I simply don't know how to trick my brain into valuing money, awards, or careers over love and family like everyone else does and see that as success.

>>18692622
Well there's not much for an alternative so I'll take what I can get. Guys are the biggest ho's then lol

>>18692628
>I simply don't know how to trick my brain into valuing money, awards, or careers over love and family like everyone else does and see that as success.

That's not the point. The point is not to "trick" yourself into anything.

The point is to understand this:

>When I was with my last boyfriend, I felt successful,

Is putting all your self worth on someone else. Which is really stupid. Being loved is important, but it can't be a single, binary choice: BF = success, NO BF = failure. That's not healthy.

Also:

>It's unworthy of praise or admiration, anyone can do it.

Yeah, cause every single person in a relationship is the best of the best, right? Don't make me laugh. You are idealizing relationships. That's your main issue.

>>18692629
women like to think that but on average guys are having a lot less sex than women these days.

>>18692560
Are you girl? I doubt you

>>18692634
Yeah, I know I'm living on hardmode when my sense of success is dependent on another human being cooperating with me, but I don't know how NOT to think that way. I've been told time and time again its not healthy, but I've found no pill that can magically turn this around.


Yeah, bad relationships exist, I'll give that, but I think far more good relationships exist than bad. Most of the time those in bad relationships even get out of them and find good ones.

>>18692625

So what am I suppose to do, go find a cute female friend who will give me lots of hugs?

>>18692230
anyone here some kind of borderline + bipolar?

my ex is both slightly (gaslighting, had to say sorry everytime, she had not much empathy towards me)

>>18692638
Idk not in my experience.
Women are still shamed for having sex, they're hos if they put out, as proven in this thread. But men who get a lot of pussy are heros. Therefore women are more tight lipped about their count, whereas men openly brag about it. I also find that most women are like me, they want something more but know no guy wants that, so they give into the game that men created the rules to. But I'll give, since people are most likely to hang around people like minded to themselves, my sample pool is biased.

Still though, doesn't change my fate. I'll never meet a guy who doesn't want to just fuck and dump me.

>>18692629
>>18692638
This. bottom 80% of men compete for bottom 20% of women, and top 20% of men compete for top 80% of women. Obviously this is very frustrating for a lot of guys, but if you think about it mathematically it probably produces a better gene pool.

Still, good luck getting one of your top 20% guys if you're a ho, because they literally get pick of the litter babe.

>>18692641
>Most of the time those in bad relationships even get out of them and find good ones.

Hahahaha, want to learn about bad relationships? Go read a bit about abussive relationships and how people can stay in hell for years.

Maybe that will help you shatter that false image you have of relationships. Investigate some more about them.

>>18692644

Slow down, Speed Racer! How many female frineds do oyu have right now? I'll go out on a limb and say 0.

You can't expect to find someone to fit you specific desires like this. Start by making female frineds in general. Learn to interact and see if women really hate you so much. Start small.

Girls: what's your opinion of men who refuse to let women "wear the pants" in their relationship? Everybody else I know who is dating someone basically does everything the girl wants.

>>18692655
not him but i literally found my ex through sheer coincedence on 4chan

>>18692648
yeah but you're ignoring that guys can't admit having no or few sexual experiences, so really it sucks for both of us.

>>18692624
Really?
Won't you think your bf is gay?

>>18692658

I don't see how that's relevant to my post, though.

>>18692671
don't no either, sorry anon, still roughed up from the breakup

continue with the other anon

Anyone, I am trying to figure shit out. 30, and trying to piece things together.

Been with my (first and only) gf for 2 years, and we moved to NY recently for my new job. Things have been depressive. Her health has nosedived, and she's been in an awful headspace for awhile. Being around her is one part reassurances, standoff cuddling, and very infrequent sex.

It doesn't help I'm on the spectrum, getting dx'd last year. I've learned a lot in a short time, and have gotten generally better at handling my own crazy, but we don't have a spark. She said she feels like I duped her, because I mentioned wanting a relationship/sex when we first met, but I don't express it well. Which means she's not attracted, which leaves me in the cold. I'm asexual yet I only want sex.

And yet she's helped me be normal in so many areas, learn more, she does little things like cook or laundry while she looks for a job. I am pretty sure we're not compatible romantically, yet we get along otherwise. I don't feel capable of cutting her off though.

Last week, we did dinner and a movie. Our conversation doesn't flow, the spark isn't there. I didn't think too much about it until I did a team lunch on Friday, and saw a couple the table over having the time of their life.

I don't know. I don't have game, I'm off-sync, and I feel like I've forgotten what little I did know about how to date. And so I'm getting a little resentful. Other than finding a therapist to deal with AS shortcomings, and general issues, what questions should I ask myself?

Burnt out.

>>18692624
If he's my boyfriend why would I think that? I would just think he might like boys too

>>18692680
meant for
>>18692670

>>18692678

It's your first relationship, it's fine to learn what you don't like from it. Moving to another city together complicates things, but maybe you need to break up.

> I'm asexual yet I only want sex.

This is do fucking dumb, though. Like, really dumb.

>>18692649
Hell I even go for ugly guys. I don't buy these made up statistics at all. I tried to get with a 300lb guy who lived in his mom's basement and even he didn't want anything to do with me once I got finished tugging on his dick under his belly.

>>18692651
Yeah but truly abusive relationships like that are still the minority. Most of the time bad relationships are just arguing and general incompatibility that are 100% done and over once one of them breaks up with the other.
I've read up on them before, I've talked with survivors, but I still know 100 good relationships for every battered housewife in a shelter.

>>18692666
true, but again, doesn't change my fate. I will never meet a guy that wants anything to do with me unless I put out, and then won't want anything to do with me after I put out either, because there is no guy in college that wants a relationship. Or at least the number of them are so small I'd have a better chance of winning the lottery while getting struck by lightning twice in the same location.

>>18692655

I have 3 female friends although they all live overseas. All of them tell me "anon you deserve a good girlfriend"

>>18692715
How did you meet him even?

>>18692649
That's complete bullshit, almost all the guys I know are in relationships. They're mostly average or below average and their gfs are all exponentially hotter than them. This is just an /r9k/ meme designed to make guys feel better.

>>18692733
Classes. He's at least got that going for him I guess. He expressed interest in me which rarely happens to me so I took the offer thinking "Hey, he's at least a pretty nice dude".
After about a week of unsatisfying sexual contact I finally popped the "what are we?" question and he said he just wanted to do what we're doing without labels, which I know is the nice way of letting me down.

And before you ask, I have a normal bmi/body fat % and no unusual deformities.

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>>18692740
This anon gets it

>>18692741
I see, and that's great to hear as a guy who has done sports his whole life and is still a virgin.

>>18692600

not even kinks...

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>Girls
How would you feel if your bf told you that your cooking is bad?

>>18692751
Lol, glad to make you feel better I guess.

I don't mind if my guy isn't attractive, mostly because I don't actually care for sex. Sex is just the glue that holds relationships together, I've never once came with a partner. I've rarely even felt good with a partner, masturbation is a billion times better than sex. So being sexually/physically attracted to a guy isn't as important to me. It's a plus, but not necessary since I will be unlikely to enjoy the sex anyway.

I'd rather have a 0/10 guy who is on the same level as me emotionally/mentally than even a 50/50 deal.

>>18692760
>How would you feel if your bf told you that your cooking is bad?
Would basically break my heart.

>>18692760
Well, probably not bad. But then again, I don't enjoy cooking, it's not a passion of mine, so if my bf said my cooking sucked I'd probably just respond with "Lol thank god, cook for yourself then bc I'm glad to not have the chore anymore"

I assume your gf enjoys cooking, or is proud of her cooking to some degree and wants you to enjoy it, and is not just doing it as a chore that needs to be done like I would view it.
As long as you put it nicely and not just tell her "shit sucks", and you have a decent relationship, I can't imagine she'd be heartbroken. She'd probably just want to get better.

>>18692686
Thanks, it's a rough topic to bring up. She's asked me if I truly fantasized about my ideal woman, what we would do, etc. And I've said no. It's impractical without the experience, context, etc. Plus it just hurt to think about after being alone for so fucking long.

She suggested I look for a surrogate or sex therapist to help sort out this stuff, but that idea didn't actually go anywhere. A regular AS therapist for the nonsexual stuff of course.

Otherwise, I don't know if I am capable of feeling a spark, experiencing mutual attraction, or otherwise being anything but platonic. (Or as she said awhile ago, before we were a couple and I went nowhere with online dating, "its almost like you're friendzoning yourself, you just don't come across as actually interested/normal.")

And so I'm frustrated, that I don't have the heart to break up with her when she's falling apart, but I also don't see us having a long-term future. That even if we split or stay just friends or so, that I'm still not equipped to be a healthy adult dater, 30 going on 17. And rigid body movements, being a bad kisser, and poor chemistry have me really thrown off.

What's really scaring the shit out of me though, is I'm typing all of this on a lunch break. These thoughts are creeping in when I'm working, and I'm afraid my performance may plummet as my motivation goes.

I need help. I need help. Fuck stream consciousness.

Girls-

My fiance is allergic to flowers. I want to get her a small gift, she had a rough day today. What should I pick up for her on the way home?

>>18692657
>what's your opinion of men who refuse to let women "wear the pants" in their relationship?
I don't want either of us to wear pants. I want someone who compromises with me and is able to discuss about things.
I wouldn't date a pushover who mindlessly does everything I say or a cocky idiot who wants to decide everything.

>>18692780
Massage groupon maybe?

>>18692780
Something to eat - her favourite food, some chocolates, a bottle of wine/beer, ice cream.
My boyfriend and I often buy each other books.

>>18692780
Chocolates, a stuffed animal, or anything small and cute to show you were thinking of her. You know her best, you know what she likes. If it's comics you would pick up the newest book in her favorite comic or a new one for her to try for instance.

>>18692726
I smell low self esteem. Maybe value yourself more than putting out for guys who won't call back?

>>18692794
Well the problem is I can't tell the difference between a good guy who might be my future husband and a guy who's not gonna call back.

Not playing at all only ensures I lose.

>>18692726
>there is no guy in college that wants a relationship
Didn't read the rest of your post, but this is bullshit.

I tell guys that I don't want to fuck before things get serious. I do it on first date.
Maybe 25-30% of guys tell me that they're not interested then, but most of them call back and ask me on a 2nd date.

Have some self worth.

>>18692732

Make real friends, not online ones

>>18692785
>>18692786
>>18692787
Thanks friends, I'll get her a blackberry cobbler at the bakery. Maybe I'll give her a massage too

>>18692723
>but I still know 100 good relationships

You know a 100 couples?

>>18692798
Well I've had the opposite experience. I've tried telling them flat out before even meeting me I don't want to have sex outside a relationship.
I get a thin, vague excuse as to why they can no longer meet up and then radio silence. Every single time. Ive already met 5 guys this semester alone, all of them quickly lost interest the longer I went without some sort of physical touch.

>>18692803
Yeah, between friends (and their families), neighbors, family, coworkers, it's not hard to know that many. Think about how many people you meet in a week, even if they're just acquaintances.

>>18692795
The difference the good guy calls back if you don't put out.

>>18692809

But you know they are all happy people that deserve and better each other?

>>18692811
Then I have yet to meet one, even after 5 years of active searching

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>>18692574
>sorry our schedules are so conflicting, but I promise I really do wanna meet up and as soon as we're both opened up I'll make sure it happens
>say basically this to a girl
>she stops talking to me 3 weeks later

Why are women so fucking passive? I don’t understand how you show your love if you don’t show initiative.

girls: why do you get so hurt when you find out a guy you 'like as a friend' is attracted to you?

>>18692816
Because they tell people they're happy.
Sure they can be lying, but I'd say its a pretty pessimistic view on life to say that 100% of all relationships are terrible, and they hate one another, and put on a fake happy face every day.
I just do not believe statistically that can be true, its far more likely for the people who say they are happy in their relationship to be telling the truth.

But even if your pessimistic world is the truth, then convince me why life is even worth living if every single one of us is only in it for ourselves and could care less about one another and nobody will ever find happiness, only misery and sorrow, within another person.

I don't wanna live in that world. Sounds like shit

>>18692821
You show your love. They receive your love.

>>18692819
Well, sometimes people don't care to wait. Nothing you can do, you were just not meant to be.
Besides, if your schedules conflict so badly, there's no point in getting into something serious. Why bother "dating" a guy you can only see once every other month?

That's actually how I lost an ex. We both got our jobs, both had set schedules, and we never had any matching days off. At best we saw each other for a couple hours when we were both off, and occasionally we asked for days off on each other's days off. It was just too much work to try and schedule our lives like that, and we both ultimately decided we liked our jobs more than each other because neither of us wanted to quit. There weren't any hard feelings, in another time line I'd happily go back to him if he felt the same. But we just didn't have time for one another.

>>18692822
how can you not realize that's an awkward position to be in?

>>18692822
Because that destroys the friendship. There is just no way around it, because once you get feelings you don't just get to be friends. Deep down we know they're just keeping us around in hopes we'll grow on them, or change our minds, and that's not a real friendship.

>>18692819

To be fair, you two didn't meet for three weeks.

>>18692822
because you were too much of a pussy coward to make your intentions known and now i have to drop someone i liked as friend and who I thought liked me as a friend because he's a fucking retard

>>18692842
>because he's a fucking retard
Umm, women are the retarded ones for believing guys want to be their friends in the first place sweetie x)

>>18692842
Well lets be fair anon, yes this happens a lot but there are sometimes when those feelings do just grow without that ever being your intent or you had those feelings from the start.

Happened to me. I had a friend who was 100% a friend to me when I met him. Few years later I realized somewhere that had changed and I liked him. Kinda sucked, I never wanted it to go down that route but it did.

Thankfully I just distanced myself a bit and got over it pretty fast. But it still put a damper on the friendship

>>18692850
In that case you have enough common sense to never bring it up if you actually value the friendship

>>18692847
Man gonna have to tell my flaming homo friend to stop trying to get into my pants with false friendship and focus more on the dick that's in his ass.

>>18692822
Because it calls into question your whole friendship if his agenda was to get his dick inside you the from the start.

Plus most guys will simply abandon "friendships" when they find out you will never let them put their dick in you. Because it wasn't really a friendship from the start, it was an attempt at getting their dick wet.

The girlfriendzone sucks, and it's why I never bother to make friends with guys anymore.

>>18692821
>Why are women so fucking passive?
I'm not passive at all, with guys I like.

>>18692842
>because you were too much of a pussy coward to make your intentions known and now i have to drop someone i liked as friend and who I thought liked me as a friend because he's a fucking retard
why didn't you tell me this instead of staying "let's stay friends" and then pretending like we never met?

>>18692854
Eh depends. If you're so uptight and hateful that if a friend genuinely had this scenario and bottling it up was hurting them, and your response to them getting it all on the table so you can move on is to berate them then you probably don't value the friendship either.

I told him, he understood but told me he was interested in someone else, asked what he can do that would make this situation the best of the worst situation, told him I'll take some space and hope he'd still be there when/if I came back around, and he said he would.

Boom. We're still friends and I totally appreciate how he handled it. Made it clear I was never going to be more than a friend to him, didn't take advantage of the feelings, and did what he could to make it the best he could. Think that's a much better approach than anger, if you are a true friend.

>>18692827
>I'd say its a pretty pessimistic view on life to say that 100% of all relationships are terrible,

I'd say that too. When did I imply every relationship was bad? Why do you jump from one extreme to the other?

>>18692806
Better yourself to the point you're worth staying around without sex. And keep doing it.

You don't have to avoid showing interest, or being physical. Just don't fuck them.

>>18692821

I guess they just don't like you, mate. They show initiave all the time otherwise.

>>18692872
Idk that's the impression you're giving me, I shouldnt idealize relationships because the majority of them are shit. And all I was trying to say is statistically I think most relationships are good, and you just keep shooting that down.

How else am I supposed to interpret that? What percentage of relationships do you think truely are abusively bad?

>>18692871
yeah whatever. i wasn't talking about your exceptional case. i'm talking about intentional deceit.

>>18692869
You do realise the person you're responding to isn't actually your ex right? Different people will say and do different things.

Girls-

My friend's wife wants to hang out with me solo.
I have a girlfriend though, and friends wife has tried to kinda be friends with her, but she basically completely ignores my gf when we're all together. How do I make this not weird

>>18692885
Don't hang out with her solo. That's how you avoid making it weird. Either she has an agenda and you avoid it totally, or she doesn't and it doesn't really matter.

>>18692877
Idk how to do that when I genuinely do believe I'm worth it. I think I'd be a great gf, I don't think I have poor self esteem at all. They'd be lucky to have me if they gave me the chance, I really believe that.

They just don't care to find out.

Guess I will say, I never have vaginal intercourse with them. I blow them at most and hold vaginal sex as a prize for dating me. Nobody takes the bait completely. I had a couple guys last year that at least came around for seconds, but they were trying to push for full sex on the second meeting without commitment and when I held firm they stopped contacting me

>>18692882
Thats fair. Just know some people automatically assume it's intentional when that's not always the case. Yeah, it happens a lot I'll give that, but give the benefit of the doubt from time to time.

>>18692771
>I can't imagine she'd be heartbroken
Well, she's upset now and sulking, she refuse to talk to me.
She give me the silent treatment for 3 days or so whenever she's mad at me.
Her cooking is bad though, haven't told her "shit sucks", just it doesn't taste good.

Should I just man up and eat whatever she cook?

>>18692890
Oh yeah I have no intention of hanging with her alone, but she's asked me to, and her husband (one of my longest friends) seems really oblivious to some of the implications. It could be that I'm overthinking it, but it feels reeeeeallly sketchy and my gut says it wouldn't be an innocent kind of thing.
Meanwhile my gf would probably shit herself if she knew about this. I want to tell her but I don't want to risk losing seeing my bro. Should I just totally pretend it never happened?

>>18692821
You're probably not as hot as you think you are. When I want a guy, I make a move.

>>18692780
Depends on your gf personality.
My bf knows I like small jeweleries, so he buys me a necklace.
>chocolate
She might hate you later if she gain weight.
>perfume
Is a good choice.
Skin care product if you know what she use.

You can be romantic and give her handmade service coupons.

>>18692881

I don't know how many are abusive, and I think it'll be hard to find a real number for that. But I trying to show you people can be in a relationship and still be a mess and unhappy.

You say a relationship equals success. I'm showing you it doesn't. "Idealizing" means your treat a romantic partner as the only measure of success and worth in your life. You can have a happy relationship, plenty of people do. But they also have other goals and dimensions. And you csn be single and happy. Don't put so much weight on it.

If you can't be happy alone, try to see what it is that you don't like about yourself instead of trying to fill the void with another person.

>>18692911
>perfume
>Skin care product if you know what she use.
Those are not small gifts tho.
My perfume costs 180$, the cheapest skincare product I use is like 20$ at full price and the most expensive is 80$.

>>18692911
>>18692926
Im getting her this blackberry cobbler thing that she loves from the bakery down the street from my work. She hasn't had it in a long time, and she's quite thin so I don't think there will be any backlash about that.
Her mom's cat died and that thing was precious to them both. Would get her one myself but neither of us are home for 2 weeks a month so we have a soft agreement on no pets for awhile

>>18692926
Well, girls don't like cheap men.
Get some body oil and give her full body massage.

>>18692937
That's a good idea, OP.
I'm sorry for your girlfriend and her mom.

>>18692942
>girls don't like cheap men.
I don't exactly like guys who throw money at me either.
The point was being thoughtful, not showing off your money.

>Girl approaches me on night out
>Seems fairly interested when she speaks to me
>Nothing happens although she does ask my name as I leave
>Two months later
>See her about close to the area I live (though I don't think she's seen me), which adds up with the fact she mentioned she works near where I live

Is it worth doing anything? Or was it just two ships passing in the night, and she probably won't remember me as she had presumably had a bit to drink, and she won't be wearing her beer goggles? Plus if she was just up for a one night stand which I'm not into.

>>18692942
I mean if I want to go the sexy route I could offer to help her try out some kegel eggs that she's been wanting but I don't think her pet's death is gonna put her in the mood, man. Not trying to ERP on /adv/ either

>>18692955
>Is it worth doing anything?

You skulking around until you find her place of work? That's not worth it.

>>18692961
I have no idea where she works, I've just seen her in the street a few times.

>>18692968

Sorry, there was supposed to be a "mean" in there.

>You mean skulking etc.

>>18692968
The fact that you're thinking about her still means you want something more. I wouldn't act on it though, personally. I'd rather be a little shy than a little creepy. But desu I've never been approached by a woman and had her ask about me.

>>18692981
It's rare it happens to me too. The thing is, this girl is ridiculously good looking, I've seen men who are better looking than me with worse looking girlfriend, and I feel like I missed a great opportunity that night.

>>18692899
Probably, if she's willing to put in the effort to cook for you then I'd say you should probably appreciate that alone. Gotta pick your battles, is her cooking so bad that you'd rather her feel bad than eat it? (because if it is that's a completely understandable choice) Or would you rather eat the meh food to keep her happy?

Now that you've already said something this might not be a good approach now, but maybe you might take a cooking class together as a date sometime. Might be fun

>>18692842
>>18692859
Not always the case.
A few times I have had a great friendship with girls who I considered unattractive and then suddenly we get super close and I developed feelings.

Happened recently, I worked with a girl for a year and did not consider her good looking until we became super close.
She rejected me but I got over it fairly quickly and now we are still friends, not as close as we were but still good friends.

>>18692989
This, my girl can't cook for shit. But I say thank you and tell her it's good and try to make suggestions for new things to try. The fact that she even bothers to cook for me after we both work long hours makes her wonderful.

...just kidding, she's never cooked a day in her life, we're millenials, aint nobody gonna cook for yo ass but your momma and yourself. If she ever offered, I'd put a ring on it immediately

>>18692912
Alright, I understand you now. I suppose I again just don't know how else to measure success. I mean, yes, when I see the happy couple grocery shopping together I see them as successful, whereas when I see the redneck dragging his beaten wife around I don't see her as successful.
I guess I measure success in happy relationships then, but I don't otherwise know how to find success in everything else. Like I said, most things that others praise me for or get praised for I just feel are shit you're supposed to do anyway. There's no glory in a promotion or good grades to me, I don't feel anymore proud of that than I do proud of myself for remembering to flush the toilet when I'm done. Its just something you do, but everyone else seems to think it's a big damn deal.

> try to see what it is that you don't like about yourself instead of trying to fill the void with another person.
I can't really think of anything like that.
I'd like to be more in shape, and I have been working out, but the underlying core of it all still goes back to that relationship. I'm not getting in shape and losing weight for my own gain, or for my health, I'm only doing it because I want to be more attractive to a potential bf.
Thats all I can really think of as far as insecurities go though. I like most things about myself.

>>18693004
>I actually cook my boyfriend breakfast and dinner every day, even if we both work full time
>Pack his lunch every day
>He hasn't proposed yet

Should I dump him?

>>18693011
>I like most things about myself.

But you don't like to be single. Why is that?

>>18692649
This is why I gave up. Life is so much simpler without romance getting in the way.

>>18692989
She is sister for 4 brothers and a father and have been the one that cook, so I'm thinking I've hurt her pride as a woman.
On the other hand I make my own food ever since I was 16, and I' better than her at it.
>take a cooking class
I believe this would back fire.
>>18693015
He's a mama's boy.
Do you wash his clothes as well?

>>18693018
Because it feels like I'm unsuccessful, because I have found no other thing that makes me feel successful and don't know where to look to find that answer.
And because I feel lonely, and for whatever reason friends/family/pets do not make me feel less alone. There are certain types of loneliness that only certain relationships can fill. Sometimes I get lonely for my friends, and then when I hang out with them I feel better. Sometimes I get lonely for my mom and dad, so I go home for a weekend to visit.
When I feel lonely for a romantic partner, I have no outlet for that. So that gauge is just constantly on empty.

>>18693035
>Do you wash his clothes as well?
Yes, and iron, and do most chores.

Wouldn't want it otherwise to be honest.

>>18693035
true, how exactly did you bring this up? For good measure, what exact words did you say?

>>18693015
Not trying to grandstand as a white knight here but you should at least have a conversation with him about your future together.

I would tell him you want to know his plans and adjust yours accordingly. If my gf made me just one meal, I don't care how awful it tastes- I'd feel so much better about the future. I've cooked several times and usually she's incredibly ungrateful, even when it's something she wanted specifically.

I made her sushi once (huge pain in the ass) and it was pretty good but she complained the whole time about how it didn't seem as good as a restaurant.

I'd wife her immediately if she helped with anything, food, laundry, dishes, (sex more than once a month) but right now her contributions are zero, and you probably deserve the world since you have the kindness to go to all that trouble of feeding your man

>>18693054
I don't mind doing things for him. It's my way of expressing affection.
I fucking suck at talking. I don't like I love yous and you're the love my life.
I am not extremely cuddly (even if I'm trying to get better at this) either.

So my way to tell him I love him is putting food on the table every day, ironing his shirts, sucking his dick and wiping the kitchen counter. It's not the best, but it's my way to show him I'm considered.

Jokes aside, he does things for me - he does the chores I hate, goes grocery shopping, cleans the car, buys me flowers just because he knows I like having fresh flowers at home, does maintenance work and waters the plants.
He's a kind guy.

>>18692760
Not a girl. I'm a professional. Unless she is too my cooking is likely berrer

>>18692912
>If you can't be happy alone, try to see what it is that you don't like about yourself instead of trying to fill the void with another person.
This is so full of projection.

For me, I'm very happy with myself, but it still hurts to be alone. More so when no girl has ever liked me, it makes me feel like something less than human. Everyone else gets accepted and loved. You don't. It hurts not to be worthy of that.

>>18693057
Got into my eyes once. Still had make-up on so it was a bitch to clean and I had a red eye the rest of the evening. Do not aim at her eyes. Ever.

>>18693044
How old are both of you? How long you've been together?
>>18693050
It's not the first time she cook for me, I know she isn't a very good cook, or let's say her cooking doesn't fit my tastes.
It was the fist time she cook diner though, she made grilled chicken steaks, which was dry nearly burned from the outside and undercooked from the inside.
I didn't say anything at first and kept eating the smashed potato side dish,
She asked my why haven't I eaten the chicken and told her "I didn't like because it wasn't well cooked"

>>18693071
Yeah I'd likely marry you, probably wouldn't take me long to decide.
Whew

>>18693057
I've never experienced it because I don't allow for it.
Personally I just find it degrading, which is ironic since I'm into a lot of other degrading shit. Mock me and call me your slut whore, but don't cum on my face you monster lol.

I do let guys cum on my tits though, it's not too bad. Feels like any other thick ish liquid. Easy to clean up too so usually if a guy wants to cum on me I suggest the tits.

Girls

what do you think about your pussy? overall happy? anxious?

>>18693088
hmm ok, I'd say her reaction was a little over the top then personally. You might just suck up your pride a little and tell her you're sorry, you didn't mean it like that or that it was just this dish this one time that was bad, if that will make her feel better. Again, depends if the argument is worth it to you. For me I'd just lie because its not worth upsetting my loved one over.
Kind of like when one of my ex's would show me the music he was working on. He did shitty trap/dubstep that in all honesty sounded like garbage to me, but I knew he put a lot of work into it and was proud of it so I lied and said it was good every time. I'd rather put up with the just straight up noise that he'd call music than make him unhappy or disheartened, it wasnt that big a deal to me.

But if he played it nonstop all day and it was making me lose my mind, I probably would have stepped up and decided it was worth knocking him down a bit.

You just have to decide for yourself what your tolerance level is.

>>18693088
>How old are both of you? How long you've been together?
I'm 23, he's 26. We've been together for 4 years, living together for 2.5. I've done all those things for him since the first day we moved in together, did it always. Even when he had to wake up at 3 AM, I woke up at 2:45 to cook him breakfast and then went back to bed.

I was joking by the way, I don't care if he hasn't proposed. I'm pretty happy this way.

>>18693090
Haha thank you very much.

I hope your girlfriend starts to enjoy cooking, too (:

>>18693042
>So that gauge is just constantly on empty.

But that gauge is made up. There's no difference between a friend and a romantic partner beyond the sex. Everything else is in your head.

>>18693107
>I hope your girlfriend starts to enjoy cooking, too (:
Yeah me too. I appreciate it.
At this point I'd settle for her taking my credit card and doing the grocery shopping, or not spending her entire paycheck on clothes.

I have my silly complaints but my gf is like a Ferrari. She's really hot, and really high maintenance and doesn't really do anything except make other dudes jealous. Sex is great when we have it (rarely) but she acts like a sex object and refuses to do anything outside of being hot. She's pretty entitled.

She's happy though and I'm pretty happy, I just wish she'd help out a little more.

>>18693127
Being in your head doesn't make it less real or important.

>>18693080

Anon has had a BF, so her problem is not the same as yours.

>>18693094
Eh, I love everything else about being a woman, but I fucking hate vaginas. Or at least my own.
It's messy, finicky, and not well built for its intended purpose. Like literally EVERYTHING gives me a yeast infection. Go to the pool? Fucked up my ph balance down there. Try a new bodywash? Pussy rejects it. Take a fucking bath in just straight water? NOEP.
Periods are hell, my only saving grace is thanks to modern medicine I only have to put up with it twice a year. Before I was on the pill though I'd get 8-9 day long periods, sometimes twice a month with no cycle or predictability, and pms symptoms 24/7. There was no leadup to them either, I'd just suddenly dump a cup of blood into my pants and continue to do that for 8-9 days straight until it just abruptly stopped.
Got on the pill when I was 15 because my doctor said it was medically necessary due to how much I bled.

My clit is nearly nonexistent, it's so small guys can rarely find it, and it fucking took me til I was 18 to find it myself. It's also delightfully far away from the vaginal canal so there's no hope for me to enjoy vaginal sex since there's no position where his dick will touch my clit while doing it. And I have an abnormally small/short canal according to my gynecologist which means even below average sized guys hurt me when trying to go all in. My average partners have complained that it feels like they're only ever getting the tip in before hitting the cervix causing me to leap away in pain

And the icing on the shit cake is having an extremely flappy meaty vagina which I know is not the most aesthetically appealing type for most guys.

So basically, I hate it. I love everything else about being a woman and would never trade it for the world, but vaginas suck and I lowkey wish I could just be a barbie doll down there man

>>18693107
>wake up at 3 AM
What does he do for living?
Anyway your age gap is a little bit complicated.
He's "old" and you're "young".
Can you see yourself bearing this man children?
Try opening the subject of your relationship future.
Anyway if he has to wake up at 3 AM to go to work, what you're doing isn't just caring, it's a humanitarian act.

>>18693133

But it makes it something under your control.

>>18693147
Sure, but mindlessly suppressing it isn't the way to go.

>>18693127
This>>18693133
>>18693147
How do you control it then? If it were as easy as just willing it away I'd have no problem. I can spend all the time in the world with my mom or my best friend, but that doesn't make me feel less lonely for a boyfriend.

>>18693139
>yeast
Check for IGT.

>>18693139
are you asian?

>>18693152

Did I say you have to mindlessly suppress it? Or are you just assuming?

>>18693153
You find a bf.

So, love hotels are a common thing in my country. I want to take a girl friend to one. We been hanging out for a while now. But i don't wanna sound like a total creep just asking for casual sex without strings attached.

What's the best way to approach the situation, and in case she's not interested, not ruin our friendship.

>>18693154
gonna have to spell that one out for me, since IGT on google gives me International Game Technology.

>>18693071
You guys sound like a cute couple. Modern Women don't understand the power of food, if you are a good cook you can have your pick of men to marry.
It sounds old fashioned but every Man wants a wife who can cook as good as or better than his Mom.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6fLLRijSdHw

>>18693139
>hitting the cervix causing me to leap away in pain
But my Chinese cartoon told me girls love having their cervix hit?

>>18693159
That's what it looked like.

>>18693139
If it makes you feel better, I dated a girl with a shallow, meaty vag and we made sex really good by taking a loooong time and paying attention to detail. She couldn't have kids and really had some psych trauma over her body. It was definitely my favorite vagina because I could do all kinds of stuff with it really easily.
But as for self-care, I'm a man so I have no way to help there. Love thy pussy with thy life

>>18693166
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impaired_glucose_tolerance

>>18693153
>If it were as easy as just willing it away

It's not that easy. You need to be willing to change. To try new things, branch out, and find new ways to look at the world and yourself. You have to open, and you have to keep going even when it gets hard and you fail along the way. You have to fight against that voice in your head that tells you to stay as you are, that tells you that trying new things is dumb. You have to change your routine, find the sources of toxicity in others and yourself and remove them even if you like other parts of them.

Basically, you have to be willing to change. And that's hard as hell.

>>18693169

Read above. If you don't have a post where I said "ignore it", then you are the one projecting.

File: yee.png (80KB, 272x199px) Image search: [Google]

80KB, 272x199px

>>18693161
Yeah. Thats the solution I know about.
But again, easier said than done. I've tried for years, through every medium you can throw at me. I've had no takers for love, just for sex.

>>18692230

Why do women think they deserve all the best and its not considered entitlement, but men complain about not being able to get anything and that is considered entitlement?

https://medium.com/@worstonlinedater/tinder-experiments-ii-guys-unless-you-are-really-hot-you-are-probably-better-off-not-wasting-your-2ddf370a6e9a

>>18693155
Nope. Short, average sized white girl.

>>18693168
I don't know, I've had some women swear they love the feeling but I'm just like, fuck no. Single worst pain ever, feels like you're getting punched in the gut. Like I snapped my arm clean in half when I was 10 and I'd rather do that again than get hit in the cervix with a dick.
>>18693173
Lol good to know. I had one very patient and loving bf when I was younger, he's basically the only reason I even explored my own body or care about sex now. Even still though, he could get like pointer finger deep before I was pressing my limit, as sweet, soft, and gentile as he was.
>>18693174
What does that have to do with yeast infections?

>>18693143
He's a political consultant.
He doesn't do it routinely. Maybe 10 times a year, when he has an early flight. I don't mind doing it - I wake up anyway, takes me 10 minutes to cook him breakfast and some coffee. I fall asleep right after.

We don't have a big difference! 3 years isn't much. It isn't terrible.
I do hope I get to grow old with him, and have his children.

>>18693176
Make friends first.

>>18693094
I think my pussy looks traditionally appealing (no meat flaps) but I have skin discolouration down there and thick, coarse public hair which means getting a smooth shave is impossible. I'm not insecure about those facts, though, because the guy I'm with eats me out and makes me feel good. I'm chuffed by the fact that it's very tight, from regular masturbation, and also gets wet easily.

I am annoyed by my susceptibility to uti's, making sex have displeasing lasting effects. I regularly curse the poor design of women's genitals as opposed to man's in that respect.

>>18693199
Do you like getting oral?
Maybe suggest that a little more, giving girls head is the best

>>18692910
In the relationship

>>18693203
Did that. Nothing evolved from any male friends, and any female friends I made didn't have any single male friends to introduce me to. Or I already exhausted their list of eligible bachelors and the dates just fizzled out because there was no chemistry, or they too just wanted a quick lay.

>>18693199
>yeast infections
http://www.healthline.com/health/diabetes/diabetes-and-yeast-infections
Also you're on the pill.

Is asking for a rim job after dating for 4 years and having extremely vanilla sex out of the question?

Guys:

Have you ever watched porn with your partner?

In what sort of relationship context did she or you suggest it?

Did it go well?

>>18693221
You'll be fine, just be yourself and you'll eventually find a boyfriend.

>>18693225
How vanilla is extremely vanilla?

>>18693227
She was into romance type of hentai. We watched some together while I laughed my ass off.

>>18693234
Vaginal penetration in lots of positions, no assplay, no oral ever.

Ok back up. I just want a blowjob but she hates giving them, I'd give her a rimjob (which she'd def like) in exchange but talking about this to her would put her off, probably.

>>18693200
You can open the topic of your relationship future during pillow talk.

I know three years isn't big difference
But technically you're in two different age demographics, you fall in the 18 – 24, while he's in the 25 – 34.

>>18693213
It's alright. It's about the only thing that can get me going, since I also forgot to mention that though my clit is small, it's also got a billion nerves all concentrated in that extremely small diameter so a lot of touch is incredibly overwhelming.
I've had a couple guys accuse me of faking because I jump around so much, but its because if they graze past that clit with even slightly too much pressure or direct contact it's pretty jolting.
Oral does feel better than hands because the tongue generally doesn't have much punch to it. It's light.
>>18693224
Huh. I don't think I have diabetes though. I feel like I would have shown some sort of sign by now but I guess it's worth looking into.
Only other thing though is it's not like I get random yeast infections. There's always a trigger I can point out, something I've done differently, like changing bodywash, changing laundry detergent, going to a pool/lake, etc, that happened directly before the first signs of yeast.
Not much I can do on the BC front. I'd rather die (and might actually die) than go back to that hell. Getting slightly anemic over blood loss from your vagoo isn't fun.

>>18693210
>uti
Wipe from front to back, pee before AND after sex, drink a lot of water.
And see a doctor if it didn't help.

>>18693228
Yeah but until then? Do I just kinda twiddle my thumbs and ignore how lonely I am?
After all these years of being single it's starting to wear on me. There's no outlet for these feelings and no relief in sight, especially now that I'm near the end of college and know there's little point in getting into something now when I'm just gonna move away in a semester to start a job.

>>18693227
We watched a sex tape of a girl she went to school with. It was more of a "holy shit this girl is freaky" moment than an arousing type couple bonding moment. Pretty sure my gf would flip shit if she saw the kind of porn I was into. (I'm 23 and I exclusively watch 80's stuff)

To the fellow guys in the thread: have any of you ever traveled to other countries with the intention of finding a girlfriend? Of all the girls I've dated, the American ones were the worst, while the French and Japanese ones were much, much sweeter.

>>18693227
I watched nightshift nurses with my gf.
She thought it was a japanese sex parody.
She likes POV things.
I watch porn with my gf as prelude to foreplay.

>>18693238
How do you know that she'd like the rim job?

Maybe get her to do a lazy blow job (ie. Suck on the head and maybe an inch more) rather than the traditional in-out vigorous head?

>>18693250
Nobody is entitled to a bf though. Also, desperation is always unattractive.

>>18693253
Not a guy but I half joke half serious say I'm gonna try my best to bag a Japanese man when I go work overseas.
Mostly because that's where I'm gonna be for basically the entirety of my average marriageable age and I don't want to put dating on the back burner just because I'm in another country.
And also because I really want to stay in Japan anyway. I hate america really. Never felt at home there, never felt like the culture aligned with my beliefs and thoughts.

But I know I'm gonna struggle because this just makes me sound like some weeb appropriating culture I don't actually understand. I know that no culture is perfect, Japan's got its shit I disagree with too. I've just always thought that their group mentality is far superior to America's "every man for themselves, youre an individual"
*and yes, I know as a white American born citizen I will never be able to fully enjoy the group mentality of Japan no matter how long I live there because I will always be a foreigner in their eyes, but hey, I still think it's better than staying here.

>>18693253
I dated a girl who moved to America from Guatemala when we were in high school. She was pretty much trying to get pregnant (spoiler: she's 27 now and has 4 kids and has been married for 7ish years) and her whole family was down with it. Her mom made some bomb ass food the few times I came over. Very sweet people. They have a totally family-based lifestyle too. Like everyone for 3 generations lived in one place. It seemed really nice. I was too young to commit though

If you're on a date with a guy and he offers you a breath mint does that mean you have bad breath? Nobody has ever commented on my breath before. You think if it were a problem it would have come up.

>>18693269
I know that. Nobody is obligated to date me.

But do tell me, what exactly are my options? Give up? Because I already did that and people get pissy saying if you give up then you're a loser and have no right to bitch.

But if I don't give up, then I'm entitled? Which is it

>>18693257
I just know, I think she'd have asked by now except we both know she takes GARGANTUAN BEHEMOTH shits, like monstrosities, and she's really self-conscious about her butthole. But I've touched it before and she responded like she wanted more.

As for a blowjob, I'd be lucky for her to even lick the tip, she says the taste gags her (I've never had a girl other than her complain about that though)

>>18693275
No way of knowing, this is a common tactic to correct the problem without embarrassing the person.
At the same time, people often offer people whatever they're eating to be nice, especially if the other person has nothing. If I pull out a stick of gum and my friend/date/whoever doesn't have anything, it would feel rude to me not to share.

Only way I can think to tell is if they gave you a mint without taking one themselves.
But most people who are smart when trying to correct someone else's breath will take a mint themselves too regardless if they wanted or needed one, again, because their intention was obvious otherwise and they might as well have just told them they had bad breath if they weren't gonna be stealthy about it.

>We watched a sex tape of a girl she went to school with. It was more of a "holy shit this girl is freaky" moment than an arousing type couple bonding moment. Pretty sure my gf would flip shit if she saw the kind of porn I was into. (I'm 23 and I exclusively watch 80's stuff)

Oh, okay, so revenge porn is cool with you?

>>18693295
since you basically watched stolen and uploaded sex tapes of her?

>>18693297
I had to break up my response into two posts because tied together the retarded 4chan system thought it was spam. Fucking retarded janitors and their shit code.

>>18693297
Woooah you're assuming a lot.
It was sent to my gf by the girl who did it. Nothing malicious, just acrobatic.
I don't know what kind of friendship they have but they're pretty open with that kind of stuff.

>>18693304

Oh, did you have that story verified by the girl, and did she say others could watch it?

>>18693310
I take it that your lack of response means no. So you're listening to what your gf says, which might be bullshit.

>>18693285
I guess if you wanted a weird symbiotic-retaliation style sex life, eating her arse would land you head.

How do I get a bitch to let me slap her in the face with my dick?

>>18693320
You're retarded. All relationships are symbiotic 'mutual use'.

You give to those who give to you. You exchange value and thats how you grow to like people.

Girls: how big of a turnoff is a guy being bisexual to you, personally? Would it make you want to break up if you found out that your bf was bisexual?

>>18693338
It's actually quite a turn on for me.

>>18693338
my ex boyfriend liked boys and i liked it

>>18693355
jesus fuck, women who like pedophiles are sick.

>>18693345
>>18693355

I'm secretely bisex, and this is nice to hear.

>>18693227
We watched some hentai. I think I joked about it once, he downloaded some. We ended up watching some before having sex.
It was really really bad hentai. Neither of us were into it, but weren't sure if the other was. He was already fingering me while we were watching, so we eventually turned it off and just banged each other.

my old roommate (girl ) is coming over friday to check out my new place(so she says). I just got dumped and i kinda want to bang this chick. Yet i never felt any tension when we were roommates.

And i would never want to actually date that roommate just sex with no strings attached.How can i pull this off without making a fool of myself. Is it even reasonable for me to expect any lewdness. I mean she is coming to my place at night

>>18693364
Bisexuality can be pretty hot!
Also - while it kills me to think that my boyfriend has been with another woman, with men I don't feel much. I don't know, it's like I don't feel the competition with them.

>>18693227
We watched some hentai. I think I joked about it once, he downloaded some. We ended up watching some before having sex.
It was really really bad hentai. Neither of us were into it, but weren't sure if the other was. He was already fingering me while we were watching, so we eventually turned it off and just banged each other.

>>18693364
you shouldn't keep it a secret. now that would piss me off

>>18693338
If I already got that deep in with him, it probably wouldnt cause a break up. It would strain me though, because it would turn me off of him a little sexually, but if I liked him enough to date him in the first place it probably wouldn't destroy all that.

If I was being told this beforehand though, it would probably be enough for me to walk away before it got serious though.

I think nothing poorly on anyone for their sexuality, I respect homosexuals, heterosexuals, bisexuals, asexuals, and trans folk all the same but I'd have a hard time dating/entering an intimate relationship anyone who wasn't strictly hetero for whatever reason.
I dated a bi guy once and I remember being with a group of friends and him, and me and the ladies were commenting on some guy harmlessly and my bf piped in "Yeah I agree he's hot."
For some reason that bothered me. It would not have bothered me if he were commenting on some woman, so it wasn't an insecurity/jealousy thing, it just really bugged me and turned me off him when he said that.

Ever since then, I just haven't been as open minded to dating a bi guy. I gave it a shot, and I won't say never again because I'm not gonna turn down a guy who's otherwise my soulmate, but it'd be hard for me. I'd have to basically ask him to never acknowledge that side of him around me and pretend to be 100% straight and I think that would be an incredibly shitty thing to ask and I know I wouldn't tolerate my partner making the same request of me.

>>18693370
just gotta ask.
But be clear on your intentions. Do not let her think there's even a possibility this is more than just a fun night out, tell her explicitly you just want sex.

>>18693385
I've been keeping it a secret from my gf. Too worried about what her reaction might be, and keeping it secret doesn't bother me too much.

>>18693404
And how would that go? Hey x long time no see by the way i just want to bang you. Oh you are here because you just wanted to talk well shit

>>18693385

it must be... Someone suspected my bisexuality and told everybody, they acted like I was mentally ill. So, I denied, and now they are free to think whatever they want: of course I won't come out with this shitty people (friends, family and so on...).

Add to this the fact that I'm kinda on the grey spectrum, so... I like sex but I cannot say when I like it, it depends on the situation.

It's kinda impossible for me to come out, but it's ok. People that I like (sexually and/or romantically) are always well informed.

>>18693408
Well then you're a shitbag and I hope she breaks up with you

>>18693385
Why would that piss you off? I would be sad and sympathetic, if anything. It's not like he'd be hiding it because he wants to hurt you. He's just not really willing to acknowledge that part of him, because he's got all these ideas that it's something to be ashamed of.

There are people who tell him that no matter how wonderful his girlfriend is, that she'd turn tail the second she found out.

Someone not trusting you doesn't mean you did anything untrustworthy. It's ridiculous to take someone's trust personally. Someone who took it personally is exactly the kind of person I wouldn't trust anyway. Who would want to open up to someone who is going to get mad at you, rather than someone who will be patient and kind?

>>18693413
i meant from your boy/girlfriend
of course you don't need to broadcast it to everyone

>>18693423
>Why would that piss you off?
I don't tolerate lies and secrets about stuff like that. If there's no trust there's no relationship. Period.

>>18693418
Why, it's not like I'm messing around with other people or anything. I just keep it a secret because I don't know how she'd react, and I'd prefer to not find out that her reaction is negative.

>>18693433
Why wouldn't you want to know if your gf would hate your guts if you told her the truth?

Doesn't that seem like someone you wouldn't want to be with anyway? Sorry but it makes no sense.

>>18693435
I guess you're right. If things get more serious, I'll probably tell her. Until then, I'm just gonna keep hiding it.

>>18693423
I would be sympathetic if told, I would even like it. But if I have to find out some other way and that he was intentionally keeping it a secret, that would be a dealbreaker. Who knows what else he'd hide and lie about

>>18693409
Eh, yeah. Hang out, get close, might even talk about since your breakup you don't feel like dating but miss having sex. See what her reaction is.

>>18693431
Trust is something that is built up over time by showing your consistency over and over again. You don't instantaneously trust every ounce of an individual the minute you start dating them. So of course he isn't going to share it at the beginning. And if you make an environment where revealing something about themselves means the end of the relationship? That's just going to make him hide it harder. Particularly for instances like this, where he very well could be in denial to himself about his sexuality.

>>18693425

Ah... of course yes. I tell them before the actual intercourse:

if somehow I'm attracted, I must be honest, they have to know. If they don't know this important thing about myself, how the fuck are we supposed to build the necessary trust and knowledge of each other to have the best fuck of our life?

If we are total strangers, better to fuck my hand, I tell you.

>>18693450
>If they don't know this important thing about myself, how the fuck are we supposed to build the necessary trust and knowledge of each other
See, this guy gets it

>>18693445
good stuff thanks

>>18693442
I'd understand if how you found out was through him hitting on guys, since that would be cheating and all. What situation is it that you've "found out"? Through porn history or something? Who has conversations about every kind of porn they watch? Why would his porn use mean that he's not in denial about his own sexuality? There's lots of things that significant others don't share with each other. The consistency of their shits, the content of their private conversations with friends, the gory details of past sexual encounters, history of abuse that they're not comfortable reliving.

I can understand if he's hiding something that both effects you and that you'd care about. Like, if you lived together and he was lying about having a job and was going out gambling to pay for your shared bills. Or if he told you that he was allergic to cats with the intention to prevent you from adopting one. Or if he was having naked cuddle sessions with his male friends and said he wasn't bisexual. If he isn't doing anything like that, which he wouldn't be if he was a decent human being because that would be cheating, then all that concerns you is if he is attracted to you. If that's true, then what does anything else have to do with you? Why do you deserve information about his sexuality?

>>18693498
Honestly I don't really care if you understand or not. Have fun on your soapbox though.

>>18692778
Anyway, she texted, we're working on a meal plan for her health. I definitely feel we need to break up, but don't know how to go about it. Especially since she lives with me.

I lost the woman who meant the world to me.
I can't sleep I feel so awful.

I can't stand the thought that we will never speak again
I can't stand the thought I will die and I will never be able to speak to her again.

These feelings are the worst in the world.

Someone save me please

>>18692778
>She's asked me if I truly fantasized about my ideal woman, what we would do, etc. And I've said no. It's impractical without the experience, context, etc. Plus it just hurt to think about after being alone for so fucking long.
I think that might be a helpful exercise. What does "a relationship" look like to you? What do you want?
Knowing whether or not you're capable of feeling a spark would require you to try with other people. If you don't feel a spark with this individual, after so long of trying to, it's probably not going to happen with that one person. Just because you're not capable of feeling a spark with her doesn't mean you're not capable of feeling a spark with anyone.

This is certainly something to bring up with your AS therapist, since this is not an uncommon issue there. You're very early on in your growth in that aspect, since you've only just learned that that's a thing. Take your time! Find some patience with yourself. Better to do it at 30 than at 92.

You might surprise yourself later on.
t. anon who identified as asexual and then found someone who lit that spark

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This is a survey-type question for females. How submissive are you? On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being a stepford wife and/or footstool, 1 being a feminist and 5 being an "average" woman.

>>18693162
Any advice on this?

>>18693625
Yeah, don't do it.

>>18693600
I'll give myself a solid 7

>>18693625
>>18693162
Have you flirted and has she reciprocated? Have you gotten physical at all?

>>18693600
Probably 8.5

>>18693600
Depends on the aspect of the relationship.

Sexually, a 4 - I'm switchy, but he prefers being a dom and I try to accomodate him.
At home, probably a 3 - I enjoy being very feminine and domestic at home
In our relationship, 6.5 - I enjoy having a very equal relationship, but I tend to be overbearing.
Outside of home, probably a 8 - can look after myself, travel alone, have friends, have a job.

>>18693639
>didn't read the thing

Why are straight men so homophobic?

>>18693600
8 maybe.

>>18693600
I'd say a 9.

>>18693162
Don't take a girl you haven't fucked already or who agreed to have sex with you in a love hotel, she probably won't like it.
Flirt with her, see if she responses to it, then discuss with her how she perceives relationships : would she be up for a fwb situation. If she says no, then you know, you're most likely going to ruin your friendship. If she's open to it, then make advances.

>>18692248
been with bf for 7 years

partnership-wise:
-talking to him is easy. Whether we're just hanging out or talking about much more serious, emotional stuff, he's just very easy to share and laugh with. And I mean, on a much more intimate level, even compared to my best of friends.
-We are so comfortably affectionate. I mean, from the get-go we had a lot of physical chemistry. 7 years in, I still tingle when he touches me in nonsexual ways.
-We go out and try new stuff. We bought bikes and bike ride together, work out together, we go out of our comfort zones and do new things. Going out like this just reinforces trust and just reminds me why I love him.

There are plenty of other things but I guess when it boils down to it, there's never a dull moment. Everything comes naturally and always has. I've never had to push him to treat me the way I wanted to be treated.

Sex-wise, I mean, our sex has always been strange yet amazing. My boyfriend is a really strange guy. Doesn't have any fucked up fetishes, but just does weird things in bed that I guess wouldn't be understood in the moment. I was very shy. A lot of things that turned me on, past partners thought was strange. I don't even think my tastes are that deviant (ripping open my tights, dressing up, cum fetish, hair pulling and being choked a little). I mean, I am not that bad. He'll grab costume pieces laying around (we both cosplay) and throw them on mid-coitus. He's thrown on my heels before and done a sexy walk to the bed. I like to deepthroat his cock with tears and he'll pet my head and call me pretty which is my favorite thing in the world. Our sex is silly, impromptu, but also passionate and open. Seems like we just know exactly how far to go with each other. We've also never really had any dull moments there aside from things like being too tired after a long day at work. Again, even after 7 years, there has been no decline sexually. It just seems to get better the closer we get.

I'm talking with the girl I'm desperatly in love. I feel like things are slipping out of my hands, that the interaction is next to extinguish itself, it sucks. So I asked to follow me while I'm learning IT (she's a student of this subject).

I'm kinda trying to orbitate ad libitum to her. Because I know that it's over, and maybe I'm only paranoid, but I feel like this and this profecy is going to become real sooner or later.

I suck.

Did I make a good move? Am I being just paranoid? I feel like a fraud.

>>18693600
In bed, I am probably a 10/10 sub. I only behave dominantly when he wants me to. Which isn't even really being dom.

Within our relationship but outside the bedroom, about an 7. I do the typical female roles like cooking and cleaning because I don't mind it and my bf works his ass off and takes us out most of the time. However, bf doesn't treat me like I have to do these things, I do them because I want to. We communicate pretty equally as well.

how do i turn fb likes into a gf

>>18693924
Take them to a bank

How to deal with friends in annoying/bad relationships?

A pair of coworkers/friends hooked up a few months ago. They were always close, teasing and flirting with each other, so it was hardly unexpected. But now that they're together it seems like they do nothing but talk shit on each other. It's either dead silence between them or a constant stream of sarcasm, where they will act like they hate each other and actively make things difficult for the other.

I 'm not very experienced with relationships and I get that teasing is part of it (and being able to joke around with each other is good) but the way they go about it gives me a bad vibe. It doesn't have quite the same air as the other couples I know.

>>18693635
No, but we had some very personal talks, about previous relationships and experiences.

>>18693130
Damn dude, I really don't envy your relationship

well shit, I knew that whole 'you'll be more popular with women in your late twenties/early thirties' thing was a meme

this question is for both genders

if you suddenly had 5000 dollars freed up to blow on anything what would you get

>>18693964
How do you mean a meme?

>>18693976
as in, in my personal case, it was super wrong

>>18693964
idk I'd probably squirrel it away in savings bc I'm so broke right now I'd kill just to have savings and feel slightly stable.

But otherwise probably a car, since mine is 17 years old and starting to kick the bucket. 5k won't get you a very good car, but I know mines probably only worth 500.

Guys is this a bad idea? I'm 23 f and met this cute 18 year old guy at my uni (I'm getting masters degree) who is intelligent and funny and we're friends. I usually hate freshman because they're idiots but he's alright. and I'm pretty sure he has a crush on me. But he's a freshman in college. Right out of high school...also I'm not really looking to settle down so no worries on that front. But i noticed that i'm always so happy to see him and i don't feel so happy about anyone else

>>18693983
>5k won't get you a very good car
you can buy a civic and still have 2k left

>>18693981
Maybe because you are ugly.

>>18693984
Let him bone you and see how you feel. He's probably a virgin, so you'll have to show him the ropes.

>>18693983
i already bought a car lmao
and a 1000 dollar pistol

im trying to figure out other things to have fun with since i'm not going to start a family

>>18693989
yeah but that's part of the meme too

Girls, Have you ever been told evaluation like "you're ugly"?

>>18693984
the real question here is would you say yes or no if he asked you out

>>18693998
Yeah i guess i would say yes if he asked me, fuck

I've already gone on a couple dates with another guy my age which went well but I don't want the older guy to ask me out for some reason so i guess I have my answer

>>18693992
Ew you're right but he's so cute. I feel like a predator but I also haven't been in any relationships because school so it's more even probably

>>18694005
>Yeah i guess i would say yes if he asked me, fuck
if you're both cool with it then why not, right?

>>18692760
Same here... But I don't want to disguise my feeling. It makes my mind fucking sick.

>>18693776
>Why are straight men so homophobic?

Fear of the "unnatural".
Fear of being deemed "unmasculine"
Awkwardness with an unfamiliar, counter-intuitive, and foreign mindset.
Fear that it may threaten or challenge some internal concept or belief.

Basically, pretty much the same reason anyone is afraid of anyone else of a different color, religion, whateverthefuck.

>>18693776
because the natural reaction to 2 men kissing is the same as the natural reaction to teeming maggots

>>18693776
Gay shit is gross, even the stuff where it's just violence and degradation

>>18694017
Disgust is not fear. Homophobia is such a stupid term.

>>18693987
my nigga. My current car's an accord. Honda make good ass cars, shits got over 200k miles on it and is still conking along relatively decent. Transmission is starting to go though, my cars been shifting gears harder and harder every year. It near stalls sometimes going from second to third.

>>18693994
A computer would be my second choice/frivolous choice.

>>18693997
Don't think I've ever been called ugly to my face outside of high school. I get "youre not my type" a lot which I know means I'm ugly, but never get called out in a mean way. Adults tend to not be that blunt unless you piss them off or its just completely necessary in order for you to get it through your thick skull

>>18694049
Thought about it but I grew out of videogames and have a pretty swanky rig already

and i got one of those tiny sony vaios that i've been lusting after for years
turns out it's a piece of shit

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>>18694065
Y-you could donate the money to me

>>18694068
what's your paypal

>>18694054
So did you hear in highschool? did you feel humiliating??

>>18694071
lol I don't have one. I was just shitting.
Damn, wish I knew how people get sugar daddies and shit to buy them shit off amazon without knowing their address lol

>>18694080
Yeah, I was called a fat ugly bitch that no man will ever want by a bunch of catty teenage girls, that's the go to insult when you're in an argument and you're 14.

Being 14 of course I took it hard because hormones, but looking back I laugh because its such a desperate insult. What we were arguing about never even had anything to do with looks, they just use it because it works.
High school girls are vicious.

>>18694087
well shit nigga i was gonna straight up send you 50 bucks

guess ill spend it on a foot massage

>>18694095
>$50 on a foot massage
Now this is how you waste money

>>18694102
my feet really hurt from standing all day

ok femanons

what if a girl says to you:

"I find you interesting, sensitive and seemingly smart"

>>18694095
Haha shit, wish I knew how paypal worked.

Mama needs a new vibrator

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>>18694109
just get a man?

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>>18694114
If only I could

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>>18694123
i don't get it

do you look like this or something

>>18694126
not that bad. But I am chubby/fat, and social anxiety/retardation at levels the world has never seen.

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>>18694133
Man that sucks

>>18692595

Im ok with you getting used like a ragdoll.

I wanted a relationship. I wanted sex, too, but I wanted a girlfriend so badly between 6th-16th grades. Never happened. I was too boring, or not attractive enough, or creepy because I sat alone.

Meanwhile, girls all around kept putting out for other guys. So its my time now. I don't want a relationship anymore. I'm just pumping and dumping because girl pick guys who only want sex, as proven by this post.

I get half of what I want rather than nothing.

>>18694094
>Being 14 of course I took it hard because hormones

That's retarded you fat ugly bitch. You didn't take it hard because of hormones of a 14 year old, you took it hard because that's a bunch of people putting you outside the dominance hierarchy which directly attacks your existence as a person.

I fucking hate people saying that children are stupid or emotional because they're young. They're stupid and emotional because they aren't taught to control themselves internally.

>>18694147
Yeaahhhh Its my life tho and I gotta deal with it.

Vibrators help, but the good ones are hella pricey. Everyone's like "get a hitachi it'll change your life" and I'm like bitch a hitachi is 50% of my rent money.

>>18694162
Well, that's exactly what I'm doing too. Guys only pick girls who put out, so I play the game because its better than nothing.

>>18694109
>Mama needs a new vibrator

Wow you digusting pig. How dare you objectify men by reducing them to a phallus

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>>18694168
Someone sure sounds 14

>>18694179
Stop trying to hit on me, pedosexual.

>>18694174
You mean Chad

You just ignore or reject the guys that would actually treat you well

But that's not what you want

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>>18694176
Anon anon anon, I'm not reducing men down to a phallus, I'm begging for free shit from men on 4chan.

I'm reducing them down to a wallet.

>>18694174
Except girls have the power in the sexual marketplace. Its what girls want which goes.

>>18692649

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>>18694185
Guess it's that time of night when r9k leaks in.

I've gone after the exact opposite of chad. I went after the 300lb basement dweller remember? He just wanted me to tug his weewee for a few hours too.

That week kinda sucked because he always ate in bed and I legit got dorito crumbs in my vagina. Like I wish I was joking. I went to the bathroom after and when I wiped there was fucking crumbs in my vagina.

>>18694191
In the sexual market maybe, but not the romantic market. Men have all the power there since there are more women who want a relationship than men. They're the sellers of love and romance. Women are the sellers of sex.

But sex is stupid and meaningless without love and feelings. I promise you anons, masturbation feels a billion times better. There's no reason to have sex without love because you ain't gonna feel good for it.

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>>18694186


>>18694191
except the bottom 5% of men aren't competing for anything, they're just told to fuck off and die

i knew i was p fucked when i got turned down by a very overweight 29 year old woman with a debilitating health condition, bad teeth, and no job

>>18694201
If that were true women would choose ugly men who can fulfill the romantic role. They don't.

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>>18694208
call me anytime baby if you wanna buy me sex toys

>>18694210
Idk I see them do it all the time. Maybe you just don't open your eyes? The rarehandful of men I know who do date are gross neckbeards straight from r9k and they have pretty attractive gf's.