For those of you who have children... How easy is the decision

Are you married? if so, why not?

>>18685636

Not married, no. Heathens, I know. And no particular reason. We would be happy to marry, we just never got round to booking the appointment. Neither of us want a big wedding, so it wasn't something we thought to arrange.

I see your point though.

>>18685631

If your life is sorted out properly, then the only question that really matters is do you actually want kids. You can divorce your partner, you can change your job, you can move houses. But once you have a kid, then that's it. It's gonna be your damn kid for the rest of your life. So, unless you're absolutely 100% sure that you actually do want to have a child, don't have it. It's one of the only truly life-long commitments you will ever make. If you're sure you want one, then sure, go ahead.

>>18685665

This is an excellent point, and one that has been on my mind for a while. I would like to have children but it;s difficult to explain why. I'm quite realistic about the whole thing - like I can completely see why people choose not to have children and I'm well aware of the challenges and difficulties in having a child.

I can still see us having a children together though, and coping with those challenges together.

>>18685631
Children are your biological purpouse. You arent supposted to think hard about it and simply have sex.

So really, propose to her, make het honest woman and then do the deed. Just make sure you have at least two kids, so the kid has somebody to play, talk and compete with. I have a theory that children with bro / sis cant grow total spoiled or autistic as singletons.

Have a nice day!

>>18685701

You can't even spell purpose correctly, and you think being a single child causes autism. You might want to rethink how much authority you actually have.

>>18685631
My husband and I have 3 beautiful children and I'm currently carrying our fourth. It's very, very difficult early on, especially for new parents. There's going to be so much stuff you didn't expect that will happen and it will absolutely test your resolve as a couple. However, it's still the most wonderful feeling watching them grow up.
I would recommend either getting a new home before you have a child, or waiting until it's older, around 4 or 5, before moving.
>>18685653
You can get married at the courthouse. It takes about 10 minutes plus waiting time and I think you only need 2 other people to act as witnesses. It can save you some legal hassle in the long run and, let's be honest, if you were a kid in your teens it would be a bit distressing to find out your parents weren't married.

>>18685754

Thank you for your response. I am completely expecting the first year to be incredibly challenging - and I know it doesn't get any easier. I imagine the experience is absolutely amazing though.

And in regards to the marriage thing - we have discussed the idea of getting married. In the UK you have to go to a registrar and it takes about 30 minutes - something we would definitely do in the event of falling pregnant.

>>18685711
>authority
Says the anon who seeks advice from anons instead from his future to be wife and HIS OWN PARENTS.

Still savage anon.

>>18685888

That didn't even make any sense.

Most parents I know are very unhappy, OP, but it sounds like you have a decent support base to work from. I guess I just caution you based on how much work the two of you are both sidled with and how much money you make.

It would really suck for a kid to spend 8+ hours in daycare every day as opposed to being with a parent at least most of the time.