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Anonymous
feel betrayed by own family 2017-09-02 09:02:00 Post No. 18681238
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feel betrayed by own family 2017-09-02 09:02:00 Post No. 18681238
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Last week i went to my parents house to me them meet my gf for the first time, we stayed over night and all was fine, everyone was happy, it was my first girl i ever introduced to my mother (im 22 y o )
for background info, when i was a teen we used to fight alot with my mom, i moved away at age 16, we had no real contact till my 20th birthday. So i was really happy everything went that smooth last weekend.
Yesterday i was skyping with my little brother (we aint got much contact too in the last years but i love him more then anyone else in my family, now he is 14 and its easier to catch contact with him then earlier)
He was sitting in the living room and i tried to explain him some game. i hear my mom at the background talking russian (we're immigrates in Europe) my lil brother was born in europe and doesnt speak russian, so my mother didnt expect he skypes with me, because he is playing games with his friends via skype since he is 10 (minecraft and stuff)
Now is the big point.
I thought everything was fine, my mom liked my girl, she should be proud that i got a beatiful and clever girl. But all i heard yesterday was:
''Idk why she is with him, he is a filth and she an angel, its like he put magic on her'' (my mom religious and believes in black magic and stuff...)
''He dont deserve such a woman, if she leaves him, everything he will meet will be worse than her''
I dreamed the whole night bout it,a few hours ago i woke up near my girl and fucking started crying cuz it got me right in the fucking feels. I fucking never cry! but how is my question, how can a mother say such things about her child? my biggest dream is to have a good and wealthy family not like that one i had when i was a kid.
I dont know what to do, should i confront my mother to this and tell her i know what she still thinks bout me or should i let it be?
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sry for my bad english, i am fcking emotional right now, i hope its is still understandable
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>>18681238
Geez, that sucks. Good on you for getting out of that gathering storm.
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>>18681238
Who cares what your mom thinks!! The only one that matters now is this angel of a gf you have.
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oh my god OP i'm so sorry :( it hurts the most because it's coming from your mom.
when i was young my mom would drink and tell me i was a mistake. im still fucked up over it even though my mom has been sober for years and apologizes.
do you still want to have contact with your brother? are you able to talk to him without talking to your mom? do you even want to keep in contact after what she said?
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>>18681238
First of all, damn. I'm sorry you had to hear that kind of things, that sucks.
Now, on the advice thing: Women tend to sympathise easier with women, hence why your mother prefered to see things from yer gf's perspective; Also, some moms are tough loving just like dads can be, maybe she meant to say "I'm surprised that Anon managed to score such a good girl, I'd be a shame if they were to break up because she seems like an angel" or something along those lines.
But the real advice I can give you, Anon? Don't mind her, you said you already know she's much of a bitch so, why bother on whatever she has to say about YOUR life?
I mean, sure, having someone's approval is awesome, but she isn't reliable with that sort of shit.
YOU are the one with a cute girlfriend and you two seem to love eachother and that's what matters, you know? Fuck everyone elses opinion, dude
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>>18681238
Are you certain that your mother was talking about you?
In the case that it is: You fought with her to the point that you had to move out. You thought things were fine, but they're not - the reason this hurts you badly is because we intuitively know that what someone says about someone else behind their back is usually what that person really thinks.
Regarding your mother's low estimation of you, I would say that your history with her may play a part. She may still resent you for the things that happened years before.
My 2 cents is that you don't confront your mother over this. I would distance myself from her. Not completely - but it's clear that she doesn't respect you and in your place I would lose respect for her. If she resists or complains, then tell her that you know what she said. Make her understand just how much it hurt you, and how you can't really trust her.
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