Recently, I purchased some black, high Nike Air Force Ones as

Your boyfriend sounds like an ungrateful ass.

>>18675260

if he wasn't clowning, your boyfriend sounds like someone about to learn a harsh lesson.

unless you're a doormat for this kind of treatment.

then he'll get his way.

I appreciate it! I felt it was a loving gifts regardless and he's become a bit spoiled. I'm just unsure as if how to go about getting him to realize his- shall I say- spoiled irrationality. I'm not one to yell or be harsh.

>>18675290

people like that lack perspective, empathy, or propriety/tact in some combination.

figure out which one and address the problem from there.

and return the shoes. If he was serious, he won't accept them, and if he tries to accept them despite giving you shit, then return them anyways. he needs to learn some consequences.

>>18675290
It all depends though. Even if i dont really care what shoes i am carrying he is obviously very specific about it.

It is a nice present. I love the idea, if you are ok with him being that specific and expensive you should ket him buy his own shoes and not try to jnfluence that again.

That being said: i would not hold out long in a relationship if shoes are that important. But if that style helped you getting into him, you cant punish him for it

>>18675290

You don't have to yell. Just tell him the truth: getting upset that you didn't get the "right" gift is childish, spoiled brat behavior, and if he wants to act that way, fuck him. he can go buy his own pair of shoes

He's being a dick. You don't have to yell or anything just tell him that him doing that made you upset and he needs to learn how to appreciate gifts.
I just don't understand this type of behavior. I learned when I was like 5 to appreciate gifts and say thank you even if they werent exactly what I wanted

You've all been very helpful! Thank you. When they come in, I'm going to give him a chance to try them on. If he says no, I'll try to have a rational discussion with him. If he's puerile, I'll give them to a friend and say I'll not budget around getting him shoes again.

>>18675260
Why are gifts so important to women?

Do you know how annoying it is when a woman KNOWS what you want and then gets SOMETHING ELSE?

Shoes are very personal as well. Should have listened to your boyfriend and not been stubborn.

Also, you being a woman, you probably find it very difficult to take the point I'm trying to make. I see you've not specified whether you already knew what shoes he wanted before you bought the other ones. This, to me, is very important as to whether or not your boyfriend should be annoyed.

So it's simple, anon: Did you buy him other shoes than the ones he wanted? Then he should be annoyed. Did you not know he wanted other shoes at the time you've bought them? Then explain this to him and he won't be as mad anymore for buying him something else. Though, you could have asked because you can't just decide for someone what shoes they're gonna wear desu.

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>>18675404
Basic human empathy says to say "thank you" even if you don't love the gift you receive. This isn't a guy/girl thing, its just the nice thing to do. Id understand autists not getting this though, I understand its hard for you guys to relate.

>>18675414
>Basic human empathy
No, normie meaningless "rules" decide this. I concider this rude since you're lying about liking something to someone you hold dear enough to receive gifts from. Why would you maintain a relatoinship with someone you have to lie to in order to be appreciated? Furthermore, who'se doing who a favor here? Is the one giving a gift supposed to be satisfied with something? No. You give gifts for somebody to be happy, not to be a narcissistic cunt about the reaction you get in return. It defeats the purpose of giving.

And you're telling me it's not gender related but autism related is another really dumb thing to say.

The only people I would expect to give gifts to do themselves a favor are girls, and the only ones who get upset when the gift was unappreciated are also female. Because they don't understand the concept of a gift, they buy shit things that nobody wants and thus get upset because they bought shit nobody wants.

>but anon it's about the gesture baka

Fuck off you went out of your way to buy an object to enrich somebody's lives but you forgot to check which specific thing this should be. I'd rather a hug and a kiss desu instead of being reminded of your chromosomal incompetence.

>>18675260
YOUR boyfriend is a fag. Who gives a fuck about shoes that much other than being that deep in the closet.

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>>18675414
Whatever you say friend

>>18675433

if I have to be constrained by some entire set of arbitrary standards in order to give a gift to someone, i'm less inclined to bother.

people with your line of reasoning border on the predatory.

unless you can demonstrate how a gift actually detracts from the quality of life of the recipient in some non-trivial way, your line of reasoning doesn't hold water. Its just the rantings of an ingrate.

but maybe treating everyone as a commodity works for you, i dunno...

>>18675433
>I'm inconveniencing you by giving you a gift

No, you dumbfuck. Shut up.

>>18675464
Fuck you and your assumptions.

I was very clear in my posts that this is about knowing what to buy and buying another thing regardless (which I ascribe to female incompetence). I've went in detail to explain why you shouldn't be happy or thankful when somebody buys you something you don't like.

So let me just be more specific about gifts in general, because apparetnly you're a predator these days if you don't sugar coat off topic generic PSA bullshit: Yes, be thankful when someone does something nice. A gift is thoughtful. Unless it was delivered in an inconsiderate way, in which case fuck them they made a mistake.

>>18675470
>he doesn't know you can turn down a gift
kill yourself normiekin

>>18675290

It's not that. It's something that most women have a huge problem with.

>frivolous spending

We (men) don't like to see money spent unless it's necessary, and when you buy unnecessary items (like shoes your significant other has no need for), it's aggravating. He's aggravated that you not only went out and bought shoes, you bought the wrong ones. Your "gift" has no utility. You're viewing it as doing something nice, but we see it as a waste of money. You can be nice to us by cooking us meals, ironing our clothes, and telling us you love us, not by purchasing overpriced items we don't need nor want.

>>18675403

Great example. If he doesn't do what you want, you're just going to "give them away" to someone else. It shows you have no respect for financial matters. If he doesn't want the shoes, you send them back, get a refund, and then if you really want him to have a pair of shoes, you give him the money so he can go buy the correct pair.

>>18675404

>he buys her wrong ring
>she's butthurt about it
>But I got you a gift!

It's the same thing here.

>>18675470

It's an inconvenience because that money would be better served in an investment account. Thankfully I don't have this bullshit issue with my girlfriend.

>we both work
>we both put money aside into investments that i oversee (because she knows she knows shit about money)
>we save by limiting the amount of bullshit we buy
>this money continues to grow and hopefully we'll be retired by 40-50 if we're still together

No bullshit $20-30k wedding either. We've already discussed that if the time comes. We're going to the courthouse, will have a small private ceremony among family, but that $20-30k will be worth hundreds of thousands decades from now.

>>18675493
>It's the same thing here.
You'll never hear me say men aren't capable of the same mistake. I just speak from personal experience/observation, t. white knight.

>>18675464
>doesn't like arbitrary standards
>thinks he has to say "thank you" to something you didn't like

Oh, sorry. I see you're very socially advanced. Carry on.

So I don't get it, did your boyfriend ask for one pair of shoes and you got him a different one? Or did he change his mind without telling you? Or were you trying to surprise him and screwed up?

Unless you consciously went out of your way to give him the wrong pair of shoes, he's being an ungrateful piece of shit, much like half the people participating in this thread, which sound like the kind of guys who yell at their mom when she doesn't cook them their favorite meal.

>>18675260
sounds like a spoiled little shit to me
id dump someone like that

>>18675571

>mom cooks food we don't like
>food doesn't get ate or we hate eating it
>would have been just as easy for her to fix the correct meal

>>18675644
>trying to justify it

This is why you'll die alone

Actually, he mentioned wanting both. I didn't know one was more so than the other. It was a surprise I set aside money for (because it is I who handled our finances and insures consistent savings among paying each bill), and went with because he mentioned the Air Force Ones more regularly. He gets affection as much as he likes and he's said several times his life is all he wanted when he was younger. It's a juvenile, misplaced bias you burden my shoulders with in your ranting (ref: the boy above).

>>18675260
>>18675604
I'm assuming she wouldn't be with this guy if she had loads of good options.

>>18675680

>woman manages the finances

I apologize, you're right. He is a boy.

>>18675680

OP, don't listen to these manchildren. They're just like your boyfriend; they were brought up spoiled and never taught the virtues of gratitude or empathy. Most of them have probably never done their own laundry, because they're basement dwelling shitlords who believe it's Mommy's duty to take care of them into their adulthood.

>>18675644
Perfect example of what I'm talking about.

and to everyone talking about "frivolous spending" - first off she was spending her OWN money, not his and secondly, why are you assuming she didn't have enough extra cash to spend on a pair of sneakers?

Grow the fuck up ffs

>>18675748
but man the food doesn't get ate
get ate
ate

>>18675748
>ask for pair of shoes x
>get pair of shoes y

wat do?

>>18675787
Except that's wrong. Here's what actually happened:

>ask for shoes x and y
>get shoes y
>piss my diapers because I wanted shoes x more

>>18675806
delet

>>18675760

yes, because get eaten would be incorrect grammatically.

>>18675260
Your boyfriends an ass. I'd be pissed

>>18675819
not really.

op a shit