Please, teach me the ways to LTR/Marriage

There is no secret. It's really a combination of luck and hard work that makes a long term relationship and marriage work.

>>18658791
So, Hollywood lied to me? There's no such thing as eternal love?

this is a very broad topic that's almost impossible to cover and grasp in the limited space of one post at a time. it requires deeper knowledge about humans and relationships.
i'd really like to suggest a book to you, but unfortunately it's only available in german. there's one that has a similar approach, but at the end, the author kind of zones out. if you read up to that point and really understand what he's getting at, then you're set to have a functional marriage for a long time. it's by david schnarch. it's based on bowen's systemic family therapy model and one of the best approaches psychology has to tackle relationship issues so far. plus schnarch is also a sex therapist, whoch proves helpful since sex is a big part in a lifelong relationship.

>>18658799
the way hollywood displays love is indeed one huge lie and probably one of the biggest reasons so many relationships fail. but real love and lifelong relationships aren't impossible. they just aren't what you think they are.

>>18658799
Define 'eternal love'. People can and do love each other over a long period of time, often for the rest of their lives, but it's rarely as effortless as in the movies. You'd have to be a moron to think that Hollywood is real.

>>18658789
Depends on what you call "love".
Feeling lose intensity, but you can care for, want to be around and feel strongly for a person for the rest of your life (even after they die).

The key to achieve that is, in my experience:
>having pretty high compatibility emotionally, intellectually and goals wise
>making your SO your best friend
>accepting them for who they are
>communicating frankly
>argue well
>be willing to put the work in

>>18658799

Love isn't a feeling, it's a choice. As long as you and your partner are both willing to make some personal sacrifices for the sake of the relationship, you'll be fine. It takes 6 weeks to a year and a half for that initial infatuation stage to wear off and you start seeing all their shit. It's in this moment you either realize Hollywood and facebook are just the highlight reels or you drop them and move on looking for someone else, only to repeat the cycle.

I'm not saying only stick with the first person you meet, but the more time you spend getting to know each other before pursuing romance, the smoother that transition into "wait this takes work" will be and it also helps screening for crazy, damaged, clashing values, etc.

>>18658802
Thanks, i will have a deep look into it later.
>>18658818
Everything you said makes a lot of sense judging from what I've witnessed, thanks a lot.

Bumping before going to rest, expecting more advices when i come back, would be nice to hear from people in ltr/married too.