My long distance s.o. Wont talk to me. Its making me extremely

Have you met in real life?

Since I know how it is to be deep down the hole and not seeing the structure to the problem and reasonable steps I'll help out:

1) how much do you trust him? even if there are always surprises in life, if never had a hint of him doing anything wrong you should try to tell yourself that it is fine to have less contact some days

2) depending on how long you know each other and how long the long distance lasts, you should try to think of a way to be less "needy", I'll use that word even if it may sound a little hurtful. Yes I can fully understand he may be the one, but even then you can get quality over quantity time spent together. Think about a plan considering the time frame

3) talk to him in a clear way without any masquerade.
>Hey, I haven't been feeling too good past days
>did something happen?
>I feel we don't interact enough/as well as we used to
you should be able to continue from here. Be prepared with some reasonable suggestions, or some vague ones. And ask him what he thinks, talk about compromises (say that word) and perspective

4) you can look at it in many ways, being alone may feel like an overwhelming darkness that you dont even want to consider a possibility, but being with someone for the sake of not being alone is also not entirely right. DO NOT LIE TO YOURSELF is the biggest relationship advice I could give to younger me

Dare to change your approach and good luck!

>>18653419
We are planning to meet on my birthday, but if it keeps up like this I doubt anything will happen.

>>18653432
1. I trust him plenty

2. Been together for a few months. Distance is U.K. To U.S. Only time I can think of is the weekend, but even then I feel like he won't talk.

3. I have been super clear. I just don't get any responses. Ive said all of those things and nothing.

He dumped you anon

>>18653495
>3. I have been super clear. I just don't get any responses. Ive said all of those things and nothing.

it is unsettling how easy it is to be hypocritical: my first thought was to tell you that he clearly doesn't care enough yadda yadda you can find someone better.

And then i realised that I came to this website with the exact same shit, you can actually find my thread if you look browse a bit, the one that claims to have found "the one".

So yea, clearly there is more, clearly "no reponses" doesn't tell the whole story and there is a reason you love him. But my suggestion would be to start pointing out not communicating is the most direct way to kill a relationship, and that you know neither of you want that.

Do you think that will make him pay more attention? For whatever reason he seems to be distracted or at least not realising the importance. It happens sometimes, it is possible to miss those apparently obvious things, for example due to stress

>>18653418
>ldr
Ldr is scam. I am sorry, but no cuddling, no relationship.

Find boyfriend from your location. In the mean time go talk to your parents and cry a lot. Good luck? And please reach for help.

>>18653517
Fuck off, seriously. You give the most cancerous advice on this board. LDR is much more difficult and vulnerable that a traditional relationship, but with right people in right circumstances it can work. I understand this revelation might go beyond your simplified understanding of human relationships, but try to comprehend it and stop spouting this "ldr is a scam" bullshit because it's not universal.

I dated my partner long distance for 3 years, then moved to their country, dated them for 2 more years, then we got married, and now we are about to have our second baby. So please, fuck off with your incredibly narrow-minded outlook on life.

That being said, OP's boyfriend doesn't sound like someone who is either aware that a LDR requires a great deal of contact and honesty, or he just doesn't care. That sadly can happen too. It's much easier to dump a LDR partner, obviously - you can just ignore them till they go away. Wait 3 days or so OP. If he doesn't contact you, he doesn'tcare and this relationship failed.

>>18653551
>right people
>right circumstances
So like 1 in a million chance for it to work? Sorry, but the sooner the ldr kids will burst the bubble, the less pain they will recieve.

Your story sounds like fairy tail. All it takes is him / her meet somebody attractive (or with good chemistry) and they will throw their "ldr partner" over board in matter of hours. No amount of texting and video calls will beat kiss or awkwardly staring into their eyes and smiling. And that is what probably happened in ops case.

Imho it is you who spread disney movie bullshit lies around. Be real for a second.

>>18653572
dear sir, I am new to the thread but I can sense a high dose of hostility and lack of trying to put yourself in other peoples shoes

therefore i declare the chance of you being terrible at relationships being above average

just imo

>>18653418
I've been in your shoes before anon. I'm sorry to say, but I think it might be over. Long distance is really tough and once a disconnect like what you are describing happens, it's usually the red flag signalling the end.

I recommend that you just try not to think about it. Stop messaging him and try to spend some time with your friends in real life. Spend some time with your parents, a pet or just do something else to occupy your time. There's always more fish in the ocean, so given enough time you will find someone who is right for you.

Good luck OP!

>>18653582
I want to minimize ops pain. It is obvious her bf is either dead or found somebody else (from his location) to date.

But yes, you are right, i would never try to do ldr. Have a nice day.

>>18653582
Can't deny that, but I think he's got a point. Long distance is really iffy. The chances are much much higher that it will fail. If a car had a 99% chance of exploding after being driven for 50 miles, would you ride in that car? I think that's what anon is trying to say here about LDR.

>>18653572
>Imho it is you who spread disney movie bullshit lies around. Be real for a second.

You moron, I have a real and successful relationship which started as a LDR. I just told you in the previous post. Maybe accept that the world isn't exactly as black and white as you think it is instead of making a fool of yourself.

And just fyi, non-ldr fail just as often when someone is a lousy partner who easily falls for someone new.

>>18653606
>And just fyi, non-ldr fail just as often when someone is a lousy partner who easily falls for someone new.

dear sir, I am new to the thread but I can sense a high dose of hostility and lack of trying to put yourself in other peoples shoes

therefore i declare the chance of you being terrible at relationships being above average

just imo

>>18653598
I have no friends. I have nobody.

>>18653609
I'm hostile because I'm fed up with that one anon who gives the same shitty and generic advice and labels it as the Ultimate Truth Of The Universe, even when it's not. But you are right, I shouldn't get so emotional over something so petty. I guess I got mad because anon managed to negate the existence of a big part of my life just by saying that all ldrs are a scam. Me and my partner had some difficult moments during our long distance phase and if I heard and followed that anon's advice, my life would be empty and miserable. I would have lost a real treasure. Just thinking about this makes me sad.

>>18653616
If you don't have any friends at all, you could try making some.

I'm just some anon on the internet, but I'll be your friend if you want. I don't have kik and all that shazam, but if you'd like I can add you on Discord?

>>18653618
Pretty awesome that it worked out for you two then! I'm glad for you anon! :)

Personally I've been in 4 LDRs. Three without having met the person in real life and one where I had met her in real life. They were all alright for a few months and fell apart hurting either both of us or just me in the end. LDR certainly isn't for everyone, but you also aren't the only person I know to have made it work out.

>>18653551
I'm with you. Met, then ldr for a year, moved in together, bought a house together, been together ever since etc etc.

>>18653572
Naww, relationships don't work for you? Go be salty somewhere else. OP is asking for advice on what to do next, not whether or not something works or not.

>>18653625
I have a discord, but I'm not sure how to use it

Better to have no one than to fawn after someone who can't give a shit about you

File: Untitled.png (77KB, 1238x719px) Image search: [Google]

77KB, 1238x719px

>>18653635
>Pic related

If you click on "Direct Message" (which is the bubble with the silhouette people at the top) you will open up a menu that will have "Add Friend" at the top. Once you hit that you'll have to enter my user name: Moist Steakplant#0195

Let me know your username so I know to accept the request.

>>18653638
I know he genuinely cares. He's told me a million times. I'm waiting until the weekend. Usually he is off then.
I just feel like I cant do better. I don't think I want anyone else. I feel like Ive reached a peak.

>>18653634
Yeah tell op it will be all right. Prolong her torture as long as possible.

>>18653618
I am sorry my general advice triggers you. But honestly, nobody knows anything about op and majority of ldr goes to shit for obvious reasons.

And no, i dont attack your personality or trying to negate your life experiences. But still, best advice is to avoid ldr and do the dating the "old way" aka going on dates instead of typing online.

>>18653652
Holler get dollar#4557

>>18653667
That's self-negativity and blind love you've got there. Don't think of yourself in a "can't do" light or you will always feel down and stuck in the relationship you are in.

Being stuck can lead to depression and all kinds of other problems that either lie underneath the bed of the relationship until they explode out or they never come out and you never feel fulfilled.

It might be that he's the perfect guy for you and he's just been busy as all get out, but he also might have moved on and not know how to break it off without hurting you. It's hard to break up with someone, even over the phone/texts.

If you'd like to chat some more, I'm >>18653652
so feel free to add me on discord if you want and we can chat anytime.

>>18653696
I didn't get an add from this contact. Try adding me again
Moist Steakplant#0195

>>18653755
I did