How do you fix the emotional and mental damage that bullying

bully here i dunno lol

You make the best of it. I was bullying brutally in middle school, and I think it's best thing that's happened to me in my childhood. It's All how you look at it my man. If you want to know more (most people don't give a shit about actually fixing things, they just like to complain) let me know man

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>>18628867
What kind of damage do you mean?

How come whenever I talk to someone that's been bullied, they always flinch when I like raise my arm to scratch my head or something like that. Are they really that used to getting hit? I always just became the class clown so I was the funny guy that does goofy shit and everyone liked, hated it, but didnt get bullied so yay

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>>18628880
Always being anxious in social situations.
Deep fear of approaching people (not just girls). Fear of rejection.
Belief that you are somehow fundamentally different from other people, and that you don't fit in. Feeling that nobody genuinely likes you as a person. Feeling that everyone thinks you are weird and nobody wants to interact with you.

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>>18628907
>Deep fear of approaching people (not just girls). Fear of rejection.
So you stay alone because you fear people are going to leave you alone....?

>Belief that you are somehow fundamentally different from other people, and that you don't fit in. Feeling that nobody genuinely likes you as a person. Feeling that everyone thinks you are weird and nobody wants to interact with you.
Realizing those are just believes is a good start.

Next experiment. Talk to people. Realize people can like you even if they don't like something about you. Realize your reputation doesn't need so much protection.

Kill them

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*bullies you viciously*

>>18628907
Bro I know these feels way too much

Let me know if you find an answer

At least knowyour not alone

>>18628966
:(

>>18628867
>bullying has done to you

see there is your issue, you have a victim mentality.
YOU are completely in control of who you are as a person, blaming others for something entirely under your control is weak minded and will hold you back.

while we are undoubtedly shaped by our environment, the effect is not direct.
if someone punches you, then you might want to become stronger; or conversely obsess over your physical weakness.
your life experiences can explain WHY you are as you are, but don't fall into the trap of thinking you weren't in control

Thats how you fix it, you take back control over your own personality

t. bully who used to wreck people who were naturally self-destructive

>Write a bunch of drama whore "manifesto" shit and/or record yourself blubbering about how no one ever realises your "genius" blah, blah, blah
>Get hold of daddy's gun (preferably a handgun or semi-automatic center fire rifle but any will be ok)
>Put on a trenchcoat, boots and shades
>Go to school and kill bullies (in practice you won't actually kill them, you will look for them, not find them stright away and resort to just murdering a bunch of random kids and staff who have absolutely nothing to do with why you are doing this).
>Phone cops to tell them you've planted a bomb in your room, a car, the school, etc to cause more drama.
>Blow your own brains out.

Hope this helps.

>>18628989
I was joking silly :3

>>18629011
ok so he has a victim mentality because of the way he phrased that? bullying can give you paranoid personality disorder. Bullying can have adverse effects, so there are things bullying can do to people, war can give people PTSD, would he have had a victim mentality if he said >war has done to me? that food gave me gas, do i have a victim mentality because i stated a fact and used causality? often youre a child and don't notice the effect it takes until much later but who wants to dance around the fact to not be called a victim. how should he have phrased it? I allowed bullying to effect me in ways my young mind couldnt self-diagnose or mentally defend myself against.

You accept that you're never going to be normal and fit in. Just survive and do your own thing.

>>18628867
Look to elliot Rodgers for inspiration

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>>18629121
(I'm not the guy you were answering to but hey)
>so he has a victim mentality because of the way he phrased that?
It's the other way around: He's phrasing shows his thinking himself as victim

>bullying can give you paranoid personality disorder. Bullying can have adverse effects, so there are things bullying can do to people, war can give people PTSD, would he have had a victim mentality if he said >war has done to me?
Not everyone who gets bullied gets the same symptoms. Not everyone who goes to a war gets PTSD. I'm not victim blaming here mind you. I'm just saying that thinking "I was bullied and it made me this way" isn't a fruitful thought. Rather think "I have these things I want to change in myself".

>that food gave me gas, do i have a victim mentality because i stated a fact and used causality?
Now your just been silly.
And yes: highlighting causality makes you a victim oriented.

>how should he have phrased it? I allowed bullying to effect me in ways my young mind couldnt self-diagnose or mentally defend myself against.
"I have this-and-that I want to get better at. How do I do it?"
Why do you need to mention bullying?

>>18629018
Was going to make this same joke. Now that that option is out, I'll resort to give some real advice.

>>18628867
You don't. You have changed. Those experiences are a part of you. Time and new positive experiences will make them less important. Another option is to see a shrink. This I recommend if you are having trouble functioning in life. You may benefit from it.

If you have already turned stone cold, there is always vengeance. Does not have to be as direct as becoming the next Unabomber. One thing an evil person may do is to make sure your wrongdoers children get addicted to drugs. In the long run this is just destructive and stooping to their level, but the knowledge of this possibility may help you cope.

>>18628907
Kek this is literally me

>>18628867
lol is that elementary school wojak irl?

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>>18628867
ask americans if they eat this

>>18628867

It isn't damage its reinforcement, I got bullied and I'm stronger than people who haven't because of it. Just resist the urge to isolate yourself from other people physically and take pride in the fact that because of your past experiences people can no longer hurt you emotionally in that way anymore, or at least they shouldn't.

>>18628867
Honestly, look at it as something that can make you stronger in the long run. You've been through hell from it, but now that it's all over with, It's good to look back and say, "hey, even though it was days and months full of crap, I can use what I went through to my advantage to keep going and do what I love." Relate to people who've been through it too, and keep trying to improve OP.

>>18628907
Know those feels anon.

Best advice I can give is to focus on being a good person. If people dont accept you because you're reserved, that's their problem through not understanding you.. find confidence through being a good person and believing what you do in life and the way you react to things is the right way.