i have a faint feeling of losing my husband. he acted strange

>>18611298
10% either he really does feel guilty about that
90% cheater cheater some other pussy eater

>>18611309
hehinself says that it makes no sense that he feels guilty about that. so that makes it even stranger.

i really don't think he's cheating. if he would, he would probably die from guilt in a matter of seconds and couldn't look me in the eyes/touch me anymore. cheating is something that really triggers him. a co worker once told him that his wife caught him cheating and he said that even the thought of cheating makes him feel physically sick. we once talked about it, about how we would deal with it if one of us cheated on the other and he said that conversation alone made him feel like utter shit for days. ofc it is a possibility, but a rather slim one...

to add, my own theory is that this weird guilt is rooted in his new sex toy. it might seem very out there, but considering how sensible he reacts to the topic of "cheating", it might be a reason.

i got him a fleshlight the day befor his weird mood set in and we tried it out together. he has been using it once a day since then (3 days ago)... i might search in totally unrelated areas by now, but he agrees that it's strange that he feels so weird and strongly out of now where. i'm trying to rule out every possibility.

i haven't asked him about this yet, because he seems to really have fun with it and i don't want to ruin that for him... do you think this could be related?

>>18611316
well my wife and i agreed that cheating is literally worst than 50 holocausts and that if either one of us did it we fully expected and accepted the other to kill them. and then she fucking went and did it. and i had the gun up to her head, finger on the trigger, but i told her to leave before i actually did it because she wasnt worth the legal hassle it would have brought.

so yeah. not always the case.
but if he really is as you describe, maybe he is just sad you did all of that work by yourself

>>18611334
>1 second away
oh well, yeah i guess so that seems pretty plausible. just ask him. i doubt youll ruin any fun in it if he really does feel like its cheating. if he doesnt, then it wont change anything and you can scratch it off the list

>>18611335
ok... well, we never agreed to kill each other, even if somebody cheated on the other. we do agree that if we ever feel like we develope weird urges to cheat or anything, that we are upfront about it and then seek professional help to deal with it without ruining our marriage. ofc we both don't ever want this to happen, but then again, i don't think any sane person goes into marriage with the intention to cheat. yet it happens. so it isn't impossible, but highly unlikely.

it might be, but he also said that it's a bit of a stretch. so i don't think it's actually the reason.

>>18611343
fuck man idk then. if he really has such a literal physical response to cheating then it would be that obvious i guess. seems the only reasonable explaination is the basment thing. you could ask is friends or something see if they know anything or have noticed anything.

>>18611337
if it isn't the cause then i might have set a bug in his mind that might actually MAKE him feel guilty for using it. which would be silly af, but i could really imagine that happen. so i don't think it's unreasonable to consider if i should bring that up or not.

another theory that features the fleshlight is that our different levels of libido are always a topic between us. he has a huge sex drive, and so do i, but he definitely has the bigger one. so it happens that he wants sex but itms just too mich for me. could it be that he somehow feels like i got him that fleshlight to "occupy him" when i don't want to sleep with him? because that's really not true. he masturbates even if we have LOADS of sex and i was curious about how he would like it and also wanted to have one to use it together. but i can see how it could seem like "go fuck your plastic pussy and leave me alone". which definitely wasn't my intention. and yeah, i'm aware that at this point i'm probably hugely overthinking. pls help

>>18611351
easiest thing rather than guess would be to sit him down and ask him all of these ideas and try and figure it out even if he doesnt know right away. nothing here that particularly jumps out as the definite issue so face to face is literally going to be the only way to resolve this.

>>18611349
he has been home everytime he wasn't at work and he also didn't need longer for his commute or anything unusual. only thing could be that he "cheated" in a sense of texting someone or the like. the only thing that was unusual was that he came home from work yesterday snd hadn't had showered yet. he always showers at work, but this evening he didn't and still came home at the same time. but he also took the time to send me a text before he got into the car and i guess he just wanted to shower at home. so that doesn't seem very suspicious.
thanks for helping me brainstorm. i guess i just need someone to talk about how strange this is.

>>18611361
i'll do that. i just wanted to first hear a second opinion on how plausible that idea could be before asking him in case it isn't the reason and it makes him not enjoy his fleshlight anymore. i could see that happening, that's how sensible he is about the topic...

>>18611298
I find this interesting because I think my fiance is doing the same thing. He has been going out to lunch with a female coworker a lot lately since he got this new job, and he was trying to hide from me that it was her he went out with again this last time. He says his boss wants him to take everyone out, but he has taken this particular one out multiple times because she is bored in the office or whatever. It's work lunch, and I do not think there is anything going on there, but he acts as if he is doing something wrong. I think he feels guilty about it every time, and is constantly telling me how much he misses me throughout the day, which is something he did not used to do too much. My thoughts would be if your husband feels that physical reaction to cheating, then maybe he would also react to something as small as speaking to another woman more often than usual as an act of indiscretion. May be just a shot in the dark, but maybe that is something he would be unsure of how to tell you as to why he feels guilty.

>>18611386
he would definitely feel guilty if he did as much as just talk to a girl i don't know about or more than he thinks he "should".
thing is, he works with guys only. the only female he interacted with was the secretary that he had to bring some papers. you think that would be enough to make him feel so weird? that seems excessive, even for his standarts... maybe he has gotten a text from a girl he knew or what not. but i think he would have told me after we tried to figure out what's going on. unless he answered and now thinks he has to hide it. funny thing is, i'm not a jealouse person at all. he on the other hand is very jealouse/protective, so he might mirror that on me and thinks he can't tell me stuff like that. i'll just ask him and see what he says.

>>18611398
now that i think about it: he took a rather long time to answer, when i asked him if he's being compeltely honest or if there's something he thinks could be a reason but can't or doesn't want to tell me. but maybe he just thought if there's something like that.

>>18611405
I think he knows what it is that is making him feel guilty, but maybe also knows he has not done anything officially wrong, yet. But sees there may be a possibility for something to go wrong in the future, and is guilty for his feelings about it. This girl mine goes out with is cute, and she's fun. We've met a couple times, and I could see him finding her attractive. Maybe he does, and it makes him feel bad. Mine is also a terrible liar, so I know that if I have a hint of doubt that what he is saying is the whole truth, then I am usually right. Talk to him though, maybe do something with him that shows him you are not angry with him about whatever it is that he is feeling guilty about. That usually makes mine feel less distanced. If you already know that he would die of guilt if he did anything like cheating, then that is still probably true, and he probably has not done it yet.

>>18611398
Also, you said you are pregnant? Mine told me about 3 years after I gave birth that when I got bigger, he found me way less attractive. Maybe it could be something like that too. He knew it would have sounded terrible to say that while I was 6 months pregnant.

>>18611451
my first thought was that he has gotten a message from his ex who he used to still have contact with, even after we started dating. i had to tlel him to cut contact with her after she confessed that she still loves im and wants him back. so he knows i wouldn't be thrilled if she would try to get back into his life. maybe it's something like that. but even if that's true, so what. i know he wouldn't cheat and he would probably not even go as far as meeting her. but maybe he answered and did some "catching up". we'll see.

>>18611468
i'm 8 months pregnant, yes.
might be that he's not honest about how awesome he finds my changing body. he tells me he loves my pregnant body and thinks it suits me very well and that i'm beautiful every day.
but i also think he wouldn't tell me if he found me less attractive because of it. so yeah, it might be a reason. he still wants equal amounts of sex, though. it can't be THAT bad. it's also not that i look extremely different. i haven't really gained any weight, i basically look exactly the same, just with a round belly.

>>18611471
Well, good luck to you, miss.

>>18611481
thanks. i'm actually rather curious if we find out what's going on or not.

>>18611494
I think your first instinct may be the correct one. If you've been together for a decent amount of time, you already know.

>>18611335
Are you the same guy who said your wife cheated on you with a woman?
You're either larping or fantasizing about killing someone.