Rant

You're not an idiot and he's exhibiting classic controlling and isolating behavior.

Honestly, you should probably just leave him. He sounds manipulative and potentially abusive. I'm getting major red flags even with this little bit.

>>18610071

just dump him. this is basic shit.

>but I have invested so much time into this relationship that it would set me back years.

you'll recover faster than you think. get out of the relationship now before this guy gets worse.

>>18610086
>>18610092
I would but I have no family in this state and can't go back. I work a shitty dead end job making only $9 an hour so I first have to find a few people to room with that aren't too sketchy.
Our relationship has no romance and it does feel very forced at this point, it's just a major shit show.

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I think you're stronger than you think.
One, you're admitting that there is something wrong and that you're acknowledging your limits.

If you have to, play the survival game. Anything and everything to survive until you get into a better spot.

For me, I remembered my frustrations with an oppressive relationship and bought a newspaper every week checking for cheap places to live in the classifieds.

Patience, Hope and Adaptability.

>>18610101

I agree with everything said above. I was with a guy for 4 years, because was my first, almost everything. I let him do 4 years a damage, instead of 4 years of discovering myself To learn to love myself, to be independent, to understand my good, and bad habits.

When I FINALLY broke up with my shitty Ex, I dated a guy for just a year before I moved out of state and we broke up, but in just a year, he managed to teach me a lot about myself because he believed in me (when he was struggling to believe in himself). He taught me what it was like on the receiving end of a relationship.

But after we broke up, I finally met my match, when I was led to an old friend, and we hit-it-off ever since then. We were so happy to hit our 5 year anniversary, and I was happy I crushed our time together with my terrible Ex.

A lot can happen in just a few years, and sometimes telling yourself "I won't settle" is what you need to do, even if its hard. "going through some bullshit" helps harden a soul, and teaches it the most valuable lessons in life, and what matters.

Things I simply learned are;

If the person you are with now were to continue to be exactly as they are 10 years from now, would you still want to be with them?

YOU cannot change someone. Desire to change comes from within one's self. If someone wants to change, they will make a point, to make it happen.

YOU determine the value of your life. YOU are responsible for your happiness in life, as well as your failures and success. Ensure you are satisfied with the results. It is the only true responsibility you have.

>>18610071
>Well I've wasted a few years of my life, might as well waste more cause muh investment
Look up sunk cost fallacy