I just want to fight

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I'm always fixing for a fight /adv/. I always think someone is out to screw me, and every interaction I do is fake nice, because underneath the veneer I'm just waiting, WAITING, for the other party to try to scam me out of money or something. In fact it seems like every few interactions where things could go wrong (somebody made an error that does not fall in my favor) I go nuclear on the other party. I left my last job like this (I was quitting and had another lined up, but something went wrong with a travel expense and I basically told a webex with nearly 200 people how screwed up and scummy I felt the company was), I threatened legal action against my apartment (they double charged me rent, easy enough to take off), and I disowned my brother (he was always using me, and after I tried to visit him and his new wife (eloped) after paying her plane ticket (because I wanted to do something nice for them) he basically told me I wasn't welcome)

anyway, how can I get into a fight with someone without getting too hurt physically, legally, or financially? need ideas because I have 33 years of pent up aggression from abuse and other various bullshit that I need to take out on someone. I prefer not physical fights because I tend to lose those (weak fat female) but is there some way I can find someone to basically cut down verbally, like to really, push them to the brink of suicide? I'm a terrible person but I just don't care anymore, I need this

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