A year ago i was dumped by my ex out of nowhere as she moved

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A year ago i was dumped by my ex out of nowhere as she moved across the world. It is still causing me extteme depression and anxiety.

She was a cashier, had no ambition and I think fell for the travel meme because of that, was getting fat and is probably even fatter now, no financial skills, no real hobbies or interests, just floated through life.

For some reason I cant get over her though. Ive dated other gitls who were better in every way but had to break it off because its not fair to them that i still feel this way about her.

How do i get over this? Some days i want to kill myself. Sone days i wish i could push her off the top of a building. (I'd never do either of course). It was my first good relationship and the first one that was really good as far as sex goes and feeling like someone actually liked me for me. Then one day she just took off.

Please help.