Long Distance Relationship

>>18579304
It can only work out if it is temporary (AKA, there is a tangible plan to live nearby or together in less than a year or two), and only really makes sense that way if you are both in a nearby relationship beforehand.

Otherwise, do both of yourselves a favor and break up. Nothing good comes of these relationships.

>>18579316
Basically she's starting back in university in a few months and I'll be out of university in a few months.

>>18579320
Do you have a tangible plan to live together or nearby in less than a year or two?

>>18579324
Hard to say we started dating recently.

>>18579331
Then I'd recommend you split up in good terms.

As hard to believe as it might seem, you are both very likely to cheat and feel terrible guilty and miss out on good local relationships on one that is not very likely to work at all.

>>18579337
Alternatively, have an open relationship

Speaking from experience

>>18579341
Unless they are actively swingers, having an open relationship is probably just going to create as much recentment as cheating.

>>18579337
It's just hard because we both are clearly enamoured with each other. And I feel like if not her then I'll be alone for the next 5-10 years.

>>18579304
It'll never work

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>wasting your day worrying about two years from now
If you like this girl, just take it a day at a time. Do you really think she needs your constant attention just to keep her cheating? Depending on her major and program, she might not even have time to cheat. She'd have to dump you for some new guy to start over with.
Sometimes, for some people, long distance relationships work out fine.

Watch Continental Divide with John Belushi with her sometime before she goes kek

No relationship is ever going to work out, if you think about it.

>>18579366
You're right I'll just go at it as it comes and feels natural. Thanks

>>18579358
You feel enamoured because you just started dating, that feeling will wear off.

Telling yourself you should stay in a relationship that will not work out because "no one else would want me" is just defeatist. There are many other girls you will meet.

Trust me, breaking up on good terms is better because it keeps things open for something if you two meet up. You can still be friends and talk on friendly terms. If you try long distance and it doesn't work, you fucked up with the girl forever.

>>18579421
No but legitimately, for 5-10 years I'll be in a teaching career full of obnoxious unintelligent people. After that time I'll go to grad school and hopefully meet better people but the 5-10 years isn't defeatism really, I view it as realistic.

>>18579428
Why would you take a job for 5 to 10 years where everyone you work with is less intelligent than you

Why not just apply to grad school outright? Do you really think you'll be a good PhD candidate by wasting 5-10 years in a dead-end job?

It sounds like a gf is the least of your problems.

>>18579463
>>18579463
The expectation for my field is you get years of teaching experience before attending grad school. If you don't have the field experience you won't be admitted.

>>18579479
What is your field? I've never heard of a career where getting a job below your skill level would ever being advantageous at all.

>>18579490
Music education. Going to school later for a Masters or Doctorate in conducting.

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>>18579368
holy shit

>>18579304
long distance relationships dont work, i continued one for about three years and was going to marry her but even with trying so very hard to make it work and both of us communicating and being very understanding people it just doesnt work

>>18579657
after 2 years of long distance my girl left me for reasons I can only describe as communication problems...curious what happened with you?

It doesnt work anon...

Le reddit go back etc aside, lots of successful stories on reddit.com/r/longdistance/

It could fail, but what's the worst that could happen if you try? I'm on similar ground, and fuck it, I'll just ask her if we can attempt it any day now. If it doesn't work that's that, but I can't live never trying. Not on this.

>>18580386
do it

>>18580607
i'll do so and report back if i remember.

I've been in a long distance relationship for 5 years now. We were willing to put in the work and willing to put up with the shitty stuff because we weren't willing to give up on the relationship. LDRs can work, they just take a lot of work

>>18579304
It doesn't work unless you both make plans to take short-distance in the near future.

They never work out. Please don't put yourself through one if you've never met the person irl. You're going to fall in love with an idea, and it'll leave you mentally destroyed in the long run. It hurts when that person doesn't turn out to be who you thought they were.

In LDR. Another 2 months before I see my gf. I want it to work and will make time for her. She's busy every day but we talk every day or 2, maybe 3 days in between talking. I'm very understanding and don't make a fuss ever. Im constantly wondering if I'm wasting my time. She tells me she really cares for me and loves, all that. I don't know. Is it ok to feel worried and a bit jealous when she sees friends who are guys? I hate dating and always thought I was over it, if we break up I won't look for another partner. I really like her but I would end it if she ever cheated on me. I haven't told anyone in my family or my friends in my home town, I moved to a different state. Just wanted to share. Thanks