How do I get out of minimum wage hell and get a good job the

Get to know important and/or influential people. Sometimes this consists of going back to college or learning a trade, or lying your way to relevance.

Chances are you have either a brother, uncle, cousin or even friend in the union.
Ask them what the process is, and join, its great pay and has a lot of benefits.
Most union jobs are tenured too, so unless you fuckup, you wont get fired or laid off.

Also keep in mind some counties, states and unions might require some education at a vocational/technical/community college, prior to joining so look into that.

Its really your only way out, other than college.