Seriously, what is the big deal about losing your virginity?
I don't mean having regular sex with someone you love. That's awesome and everyone should experience it. No, I mean if you aren't having sex, aren't looking for sex, but you fucked a filthy hooker one time years ago just to "get it over with", what difference does it make? It doesn't feel any different for me.
Why do people say "get it over with" like it's some awful ordeal that you go through once and then never have to think about again? Isn't the real issue in whether you're having sex NOW or not? By the reasoning of "get it over with", if you were molested as a child you're technically not a virgin so your life should be better because of it, doesn't matter how long ago it was or the quality of the sex, you've ticked that box so you're okay for life.
>>18572912
It can be very stressful for a virgin to be with someone who has been with let's say, 3-6 partners. Not necessarily because they think that makes the person dirty, but because that partner will be able to compare the performance of all those previous partners versus your own. Plus there is the fear that you will underperform and fail to have good sex with your partner due to having zero experience.
Sometimes, like you said, there are people who just want to get it over with, just to be able to say that they aren't virgins and earn the "right" to don't be associated with the negative stereotypes of virgins anymore. Although fucking a hooker isn't really a solution to fix those self-esteem and socialization issues.
In fact, having sex by itself won't fix any of that, but it is still a source of stress because you have failed to do this things that all of your peers and people around you have done before you.
>That's awesome and everyone should experience it.
So having always been a world away from it can really bring you down.
>>18573600
I agree, but I said I don't mean regular sex with someone you love. My issue is with the claim that having fucked a filthy hooker one time years ago just to "get it over with" is good enough, as if the binary state of technically having had sex once or not is the important part, rather than the experience of it.
If I hadn't been attractive throughout my youth (at least 'enough' from age 15 onward) I probably never would have gotten laid.
At the very least the virgin insults haven't had teeth, for me, but its not as if my limited sexual experiences have really done any favors for me. In a couple cases: quite the opposite.
'Virgin' has a great deal more historical significance with women, than men. In etymological terms the idea of virginity applying to men with any social consequence is pretty modern.
Virigin as an insult is levied at (young) men as a way to call them out on having no sexual appeal to women, now or ever. In reality if you had sexual appeal to women, but were a virgin; to any sane and thoughtful woman it'd probably be counted as a plus.
I don't know man. Post modern ethics on sex are fucked and you're probably better served by any one of the social movements that gets your goat.