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Why does my brain do this to me

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Its 9:40am and i already want to kill myself.
>be me, virgin
>have dreams about defeating an enemy or completing a difficult task like saving the universe from an evil force or some stupid shit
>dreams always focus on a relationship that is strengthened by the task because i havent dated anyone in years
>experience a pure relationship, never really about sex but more about loving each other for who we are
>todays was worse because something happened in the dream that made me have to leave for a while to go on some journey and she waited for me the whole time i was gone
>never had anyone care that much about me
>accidentally break 4th wall and think something like "man it sucks that ill never have this in real life"
>wake up and cry
Why do our brains do these things that make us want to die? Why cant i just be like the normies and dream of flying and fucking slutty women i meet?
>>
>>18572589

Everyone has weird dreams, even "normies". And yes, sometimes you do sort of dream what you desire, or you dream up a recreation of a real life situation you want to emotionally understand better. For example, I'm still fucked up over an ex leaving me for another, and I still ocasionally dream of my other friends betraying me for no reason, or just not being there.

So yeah at night your brain sorts all those files you produce while being awake, so you end up having dreams related to your waking experience, or what you strongly feel is missing in it.
>>
My brain creates scenarios where I'm powerless and tired to fight. That's because I am mute and never interact with the world around me. Sadly my brain is incredibly antagonistic and this "training" does not help me.
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