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Hello anons.
So, I finally have a job for 5 months now and future is pretty bright, regularization is a month away, and job is good, anyway heres a small back story about me and my girl, we met at college and started off there, its been 5 years now and we still havent graduated yet, and in that 5 years, both of us never had a job, like at all, no income what so ever, that 5 years peaked this year, I was 21 and she was 24, both bums, we always had conversations on how tiring this is and how we have to get our shit together, and its the same conversation year after year, she had her reasons, but for me the main reason why I never took a job is because I'm a lazy bastard, literally watched movies until 4 am and wakes up 4 in the afternoon, I loved that life but I grew tired of it, I wanted to buy the things that I want for myself, I wanted to buy my girl something nice, a ring jewelry or whatever, so I got myself a job, and did those things, bought myself a computer, nice clothes, took my girl on a very nice dates, bought her shit, bought things we couldnt buy before.
I was happy and motivated, partly because I feel like im growing as a person and partly, I thought it would also motivate her to grow too, I hoped that she would feel intimidated by me outgrowing her that this would push her to get a job too, but no, its been 5 months now, I would get the usual "I have to get my shit together too", "I really dont enjoy you doing everything and depending on you" but shes just not trying hard enough, she would rely on the internet sending resumes online and waiting for a call, I have been pushing her to personally walk inside the building to personally give out the resumes, but she wont do it, she keeps saying shes scared to be rejected, she did went out a couple of times, but rejection motivated her for MONTHS.
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This also juxtaposes my problem at work, I'm starting to develop a crush on a co-worker, shes been on this job for 2 years, she already has a position and has established herself in this company and as a grown adult, for the first time in my life, I wasnt attracted to good looks, to good personality, or to chemistry, I was actually attracted by her accomplishments and thought that maybe this is what 'wife-material' actually is. Dont get me wrong, I love my girl, but her having no motivations at all is kind of turning me off, theres always a reason, theres always a rhyme on why she cant find a job, and when I try to push her to finish her studies instead so she could get her diploma, there it goes again, another reason, another rhyme.
What do I do bros? How do I get her to be motivated? How do I stop these crushes I'm having? Would giving her a timeframe of "get a job in 6 months or else I'll leave" work?
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>>18571636
Why do you need your woman to be strong and independent? My wife didn't want to work, and I could afford it, so I told her that if she wanted to stay home, it was fine. She is in charge of all cooking, all cleaning, all shopping, paying all the bills. Literally everything that doesn't involve me working or raising children is exclusively her responsibility (I want to be a good dad, not just a wallet).
I get to go to work for 8 hours, then come home. No other responsibilities. If she wants to do that, what's wrong with it (presuming you can afford it)?
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>>18571648
I live in a third world country, and I agree that it sounded too shallow and one sided, but I honestly cannot afford it if we live in together and its only me who does the work, and she doesnt even know how to cook, she was practically spoiled by her mum.
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>>18571658
If you can't afford to support her, can you afford to live on your own? If not, you're kind of fucked either way.
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