Don't wanna be a nice guy anymore

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Here's another one

>>18570323
women with class (if you have the money and personality to get with them) still respect tradition and men who behave like gentlemen. they will get bored with someone who kisses their ass, though. flattery is a suspicious and immature way of getting close to someone.

you're confusing being a gentleman with being a pushover m8

>>18570355
Often, you're right. How do I change bro?

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>>18570323
there's a grey area here.

Girls dont want a douchebag, like /r9k/ would have you believe. They want someone compatible. Being too nice doesn't work for them; it's just code for "This guy is a pussy and wont/cant protect me or our potential future." Girls like guys who are nice to them. But NO ONE likes a doormat. You have to be assertive and know when not to take no for an answer.

also stand up for yourself.

>>18570323
Read into some redpill

>>18570375
What for example?

>>18570359
figure out what you'll accept, what you won't, the circumstances under which you'd be willing to make some concessions, and then stick to that. carry it out matter-of-factly, don't overdo things or feel you need to be showy about it for added emphasis, that part is rarely needed but the urge might be there at first because it's a new approach and as such it'll feel sorta off to you while you're getting used to it. start putting yourself first when you need to. start putting yourself first when you just want to and the other person isn't in need of help. she can be inconvenienced. she'll live. don't fall for the puppy eyes routine. those times when it actually benefits you both to cut her some slack don't involve puppy eyes. respect her, always show her respect, but don't accept behavior that's disrespectful from her in return. love, respect, courtesy, effort, consideration, and all other forms of give-a-fuck work best when they're reciprocated by both parties. maintain a flexible balance. the most important part i'll repeat, live by your standards. live by and live up to the expectations YOU set. you don't command authority by being at the whim of "but *everybody* blah blah blah" and you also command neither it nor respect if your demands are more than you yourself deliver. don't take shit from anybody you don't love, and don't take shit on any regular basis from those you do love. be steady. be in command of yourself. love tenderly and deal fairly. be receptive to the same and nothing less.

>>18570323
>being nice means being a pushover

>>18570363
that's not fucking real, is it

>>18570323
protip: nice guys don't say they are nice guys. you aren't a nice guy. grow the fuck up.

>>18570323
Assuming you're not just baiting for (You)'s, read "No More Mr. Nice Guy". It works as a self-help book as each chapter ends with actionable items for you to work on rather than just spewing platitudes at the reader.
As others have said, if you're being "nice" for the sole purpose of getting pussy, that not only doesn't work, it's manipulative as fuck and makes you a fucking snake.

>>18570363
There's a difference between

BEING A NICE GUY

and

BEING A FUCKING WASH CLOTH

not many people realise that they are behaving like the latter.

>>18570828
>if you're being "nice" for the sole purpose of getting pussy, that not only doesn't work, it's manipulative as fuck and makes you a fucking snake.
This. Every self-proclaimed 'nice guy' I know is a douchey weasel.
>Fucking whores. They all go after asshole Chads and ignore guys like me
>My GF is such a fucking cunt. I do everything for her and she still treats me like shit. A guy like me deserves better.

Yeah bro, you're nice as fuck.

>>18570323

>>18570355
He's right

Girls go for guys with IDENTITY ("This is where I draw the line","My opinion on A/B is X/Y").
They're passing you by because you (most likely) agree with and accept everything/everyone.
It shows you dont know who you are and besides it being very beta, it;s also a bore to talk to someone without a grounded point of view.

Find yourself OP,
think about who you are, what you think of certain things, how you want to deal with certain situations. Have that shit clear as day.

>>18570377
/r/TheRedPill

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>>18570930
This solid advice right here.

One time I was at a party and somehow got on the topic of whether/not it's ethical for private business owners to deny service to gay people. I'd been talking to this girl, and one of her gay friends and I got into a debate on this very subject as she stood there listening. I lean libertarian, and I calmly explained that while I would never personally deny anyone service on that basis, I believed that shop owners had the right to do what they wanted.

It was a great conversation, her friend didn't take it personally, and we ended up sleeping together soon after that (the girl and I, not her friend, lol). Be friendly and fair-minded, but confident in your convictions, and people will really appreciate it.

>>18570930
So, be a stupid asshole who never so much as considers the possibility you aren't always right and always the best at everything.

>>18571421
This is called "confidence", anon.

>>18570375
don't do this if you want to have a healthy relationship

>>18572203
Do it if you want relationship

>>18572294
disregard his

>>18570828
>read "No More Mr. Nice Guy"
I listened to the song version instead.

You have to met the kind of woman you want in a situation where they'd be.

>Nightclubs
>Only gonna find sluts and shallow cunts

>Book club
>Gonna find middle-class well-read women

Being a nice guy is far more likely to get you a nice lady in the latter situation.

>>18573284
Where can I find a promiscuous woman who happens to be into literature ?

Why doesn't just ''wanna fuck'' work? Huh?

>>18573297
Night book clubs.

>>18570330
At the "* To get women attracted..." and beyond. I'm lost because I'm socially inept with women these days. Idk how to carry a convo with women anymore. Because apparently I'm funny but always get flaked for dates. I can't lie I feel insecure and very fucking confused. 22 btw.

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>>18570323
listen to patrice o'neal on women

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpHCsNEyWm4&t=369s

be righteous about everything bro. good luck

>>18573425
>Night book clubs.
bahahahahahahahaha good one lol

Bumps

why do people think being a 'nice guy' means doing arbitrarily and/or objectively nice things in hopes of some reciprocation?

a real nice guy is just fucking nice because he wants to be, and he'll keep being nice because thats what makes him happy. Not because he's waiting on a payoff.

>>18575258
this.

then there's the, don't be a pushover thing, then there's the gentleman in the streets dom in the sheets thing, then there's the have a slightly dangerous side.

>>18575258
then there's the make your intentions very clear so there's no confusion thing. then there's the part where none of that works if you're ugly.

>>18575258
It's because some people are betas and annoying jerks, but think they are nice. Then blame them being too nice for the reason they can't get girls.

Being actually nice, and being confident at the same time, is a very powerful combination to attract girls.