I need help with my fiance

>>18569007
Which religion is he from?
If atheist, did he had negative experiences with the church?
As a "catholic atheist" I know the "hate" one feels in the beginning. With enough education about objective history instead of meme atheism it can be resolved. Problem: That requires a man willing to change his view in the face of facts, most people rather believe in their comfy ideology.

But it's also possible that he just felt out of love and looks for an excuse. Sorry to tell you, but moving to another country to flee from your problems isn't the way to go. Get your shit together and move back to your nation and look for a man with similar view of your own subrace. This will not be the only problem resulting from a different upbringing, especially if you want children.

>>18569007
If you honestly believe that religion is necessary for you and you need it to have peace in your life and your partner destests it so much that he claims it made him lose his love for you - leave him. Catholic religion is very mild, so I think he is exaggerating and honesty he seems to be a petty and narrow minded person.

Are you from Poland by any chance?

>religion and romance

Boy, that's a tough one. For anyone on the other side, it's sort of a 'we may be liable to stop doing things you enjoy on the pretext of some old guys who wrote a dusty book millenia ago.' Which sucks, because what you enjoy with people is sort of why we're still here, honestly.

It's not that he's wrong and you can't really sign him to that, because that's no more fair to him than he's being to you. You have to really open up dialogues about this and cover what his problems are; you need to confirm he's worrying over nothing (as I expect you intend to make the case).

Lastly, you need to understand religion has a nasty habit of being cult-like when used to mend someone's mental health. There is a lot of history all around us to suggest it's not a good idea to mix religion with non-religious things.

religion is like a penis, many people react badly if you shove it down someone elses throat without consent.

He is not religious and he will never be, if you want him to get baptised, you want to change him, you are the one that is not loving him the way he is and you are austracising him.

If you can live with him not beeing religious (=not going to your special christian heaven) and he can live with you beeing religious without trying to convert him, you two should talk and continue your relationship. Also talk about how you two want to raise your children in regards to religion.

if you two come up with a solution/compromise, that both are happy with, good for you, otherwise, this is going down seperate ways and you will not be a virgin anymore and have no value in a conservative religious community.

what do you think about religious culture and tradition in the sense of the crusades and general dark ages, where the church did a lot of horrible stuff to many many innocent people, is that really the tradition you want to worship?

>>18569046
>you need to understand religion has a nasty habit of being cult-like when used to mend someone's mental health
Nah, that's just mental people falling for cults. For the most part religion (at least the christian one) can help with mental and physical health due to talking and the splitting of burden. As long as OP doesn't go full Westboro Baptist Church or Alaahu Snackbar, I can't imagine how he could think such a thing, especially if he knew that she's from a religious country (which I suspect is poland). I'm from there at least and it's mainly cultural glue more than actual believe. It's how you deal with people and shit hitting the fan, that's why still so many people there are religious, because it really is helpful in such a nearly "secular" way.

That'S why I also suspect her fiance is either characterwise not mature enough to discuss such topics or might just use it as a excuse. Or, maybe, he liked a broken gril from another country which was dependand on him and know fears of beeing left behind when she gets her shit together. Who knows.

>>18569049
>if you want him to get baptised, you want to change him
She probably just want a church wedding, not him believing. If he doesn't give a shit about religion ther is no real reason why not to play the part for your wife desu. It's not like there is more to it than getting some water and magic stuff sprincled on you.

>>18569054
>crusade meme
>dark age meme
Please read into history if you want to participate in religious topics, anon. The crusades have been defensive wars after hundreds of years of Ottoman slavetrade and war against south and eastern europeans and the middle aged where much but not dark. Ready, don't make yourself look illiteare.

>>18569058
Book recommendation for you:
The Crusades, Christianity and Islam by Riley-Smith (how, when and why it happend, stable food for thought at any university)
God's Philosophers by Hannam (about the meme of the "dark" ages, lists philosophie, inventions and the basis for the renaissance which gets all the credit for it)

Both are small books, so you don't have to go full /lit/.

>>18569054
wrong post
>>18569068

>>18569054
wow you are such an intellectual!
you have no clue why people turn to religion, shut up

>>18569029
His mother is religious and dragged him to church when he was little

>>18569031
Croatia

>>18569337
Well, he might be still in his "angry atheist" phase and only said he would go through with changing because of the first love high.

Try and tell him that when you can't even talk about such things, that your future isn't together. Depending on how he reacts you can see if he already closed that case and only looks for excuses or if he's just salty due to his mother.

>>18569347
he is 24, how long do those phases last?

We had a big fight yesterday and he wanted to break up with me... Today he is in a better mood, he told me that he loves me and that he wants to be together with me...

I don't know what to do. I literally have nowhere to go at this point if he leaves me, only back home to my parents.

>>18569358
>he is 24, how long do those phases last?
Depends if he is doing anything or willing to expand his world view. I was an angry atheist till 27, this is when I began to study history and especially the role of christianity without the whole cringe atheism but actuall sources and even christian apologetics to get a full view.
If he doesn't want to change, he will only get angrier. He might just not be mature enough.

>We had a big fight yesterday and he wanted to break up with me... Today he is in a better mood, he told me that he loves me and that he wants to be together with me...
Seriously, if he breaks up in a fight, that'S a red flag. Try to be as less dependant on him as possible, in case he just kicks you out. Worst case you could contact a church in your home country, when shit hits the fan and you have nowhere to go.

I am sorry, but it really wasn't a intelligent thing to do to move to someone you know so shortly to another country. But it's also no way to stick to him if he will just pick the power card of you beeing dependant on him.

I would honestly already look for a plan B. Just in case.

>>18569358
you really should try to get an agreement with him on the basis of, you are religious and he is not, if that works out, great otherwise there is nothing for you in that relationship. Also how do you want to raise your kids, and how does he want to?

>>18569368
thank you for your advice, I will look for a plan B. I should get my citizenship soon and then I can become independent of him. I know now that it wasn't an intelligent thing to do, but I was just crazy about the fact that I could finally become someones wife, homemaker and the mother of his children.

>>18569382
Best of luck. I still hope you both will find a way to deal with it.