halp

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>be me
>ugly as fuck and been told this online and IRL
>kissless virgin, never had a girl interested in me, never asked a girl out
>have not had friends since I was 12 or 13 years old
>go through high school a friendless loser, carries over to college because I don't know how to be any different, miserable loser in college
>have a meh GPA, don't know how to network at all because of no social media
>living with parents (don't really mind this tho)
>the life of complete social isolation and misery means I have no hope in anything anymore and have no reason to even try for anything in life
>went to a therapist a couple of months ago, never went again because I felt like she was judging me
>getting angry at women when I see them with other men due to how easy it must be for them and knowing I'll never compete
>and to top it all off I can only masturbate to fucking cuckold pornography now due to a massive inferiority complex
>literally 20 years old but can see myself living like this for a decade straight

Not having friends kills any motivation you could ever want to do anything in life. Every damn thing. Even if a girl did show interest in me now and straight up said she wanted to have sex, I would surely reject or ignore her out of fear about my lack of experience. I probably wouldn't even want to hang out with people because I would have no clue how to act with them.

I don't even know if it's possible for therapy, medication, anything to fix me at this point but if I could, how could I fix all of these /adv/?