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Anonymous
Should I suppress my emotions? 2017-07-27 06:09:03 Post No. 18562513
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Should I suppress my emotions? 2017-07-27 06:09:03 Post No. 18562513
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I've had a lot of emotional trauma and suffer from anxiety, which I do not feel I handle badly. I have been medicated and attended therapy in the past. I feel stable but I still suffer minor anxiety.
I got into a relationship with a guy who at first seemed to be understanding and reassuring but with time he has become really resentful towards things, which leaves me wondering often if I'm sabotaging the relationship or if he's being unkind about it. He seems to get really mad at me if I cry over something insensitive he has said or if I'm feeling anxious over things, sometimes he's mad over things that don't directly impact him too. It feels petty to mention, but an example is recently we were playing a game and he told me to speak on microphone to the team (we tend to speak on Discord separately while playing), he knows I feel really anxious and shy over doing this, but I explained I feel anxious about it and apologised. It resulted in him being in a really bad mood and calling me stupid for it, I was a little upset by this so I expressed that I felt he should be more supportive, he then started calling me a retarded western liberal that needed life support to function and that I was a weak person.
It has become more frequent that when I express I'm anxious or upset, he ends up really angry at me. I would understand a little more if I was more aggressive, but I always tend to resolve things maturely and cater to his feelings also. He told me that when I'm upset over things, it pushes him away, so I took a step back, but today I asked if he was busy because I just came back from vacation and he was hardly responding to me and hardly interested, he became very hostile about it and claimed I was forcing him to respond, express feelings and emotions, bringing up an issue that wasn't even related. He then dropped this:
>>
>>Listen. I've been depressed lately and the only reason I haven't fucking offed myself is you. >>Can you stop stressing yourself and me the fuck out and just enjoy yourself and your life so I >>can make myself believe I can too.
>>I personally don't want you responding to the above.
>>I'd much rather have you change the subject and I know you've internally aknowledged this.
>>That's how guys tend to handle it.
>>Or at least in my family or culture that I'm raised in.
>>Where we can't really talk about emotions without coming off as weird.
It's hard for me to tell if I should be hiding my emotions or if he's being a dick. Advice?
>>
>>18562513
>he gets really mad if I cry over something insensitive
>calling me stupid
Break up. Congratulations, your first bf is confirmed for asshole. Dont worry, almost nobody picks their life time partner on first try.
Real bf will either soothe you, let you cry without interruptions or simply leave you alone a bit until you manage to stabilize yourself.
Btw mentally ill people tend to pick also mentally ill people as partners. Try choosing better next time. And no, he isnt the only boy on earth who finds you fancy. That is just your insecurity speaking.
Break up, eat some chocolade and find better bf or fix your problems before getting new one. Good luck!
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