What would be the best advice you'd give your teenage self?

>>18560483

"Go to the gym"

"that girl has HERPES"

You won't ever actually care for people. Stop pretending and make yourself happy. Doing shit for others won't do that for you.

>>18560483
Get the courage to say no to people so you don't get into relationships and situations you don't want.

Don't go to college

Lift weights. Make bank. Fuck bitches.

I'm doing it today and it's great af, but I could have been doing it much earlier.

>>18560527

What happened when you went to college..

Don't drop school retard.

Choose a degree that will actually get you some fucking money, you god damn retard. Otherwise you are gonna be working at Wal-Mart for the rest of your life.

>>18560483
Lift and fuck.

I always thought I was more of a serious relationship person, but I never settled. I don't regret not settling yet, but I do regret my porn habit and my virginity.

Smash that fucking laptop. Stay the fuck away from 4chan. You will be ten thousand times happier as a stupid fucking normalfag that actually did something with his life.

Pay attention to what your words do to people for fuck's sake, you make everyone feel bad

>>18560483
Don't be yourself.

Few of your best friends are going to stab you in the back. and people wonder why i have trust issues and rarely open up.

To not do as many drugs and try to make normal fucking friends. And get help for my mental problems. And to not get into any relationships because they're fucking pointless at that age. And to actually make a plan for my future.

>>18560483
Alright, listen the fuck up...
You have an IQ of 136, go straight to college.
Stop masturbating to loli shit, and anime
in fact, stop masturbating entirely you lonely piece of shit
Alexsis will Fuck your shit up, find a way to be a better human being that doesn't include flushing 5 years of your life down the shit hole with this crazy bitch.
An Hero Immediately.
See you on the dark side of the moon mother fucker.

>>18560483
Stop giving a shit about everything. You aren't going to keep any of the friends you have, and your grades don't mean shit when you're gonna wind up in skilled labor, anyways.

>>18560483

Probably something like

>"YOUR MOM IS MARRIED TO AN ACQUAINTANCE OF JAMIE FOXX, YOU WANNA BE FAMOUS MOTHERFUCKER? GET IN THAT SHIT, BECOME AN ACTOR AN MAKE SOME BANK, FUCK BITCHES NOW!"

That window sure did close after the divorce

A shame i lacked the confidence i have now

>>18560530
L O A N S

O

A

N

S

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None of the advice given here will help you today OP. These are just words, pixels with no real weight or significance. You WILL make the mistakes from this thread. That's how you'll learn.

Good luck.

DON'T GO ON 4CHAN, ALSO I'M PRETTY SURE SHE LIKES YOU BACK FAGGOT DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

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>>18560483
Just do your fucking homework. You will save yourself so much stress and bad grades. You will still have time to play league

>>18560483
Don't kill yourself, things get better!

Don't eat wheat/gluten, turns out it accounts for a notable part of your crushing physical and mental health issues which incompetent doctors never notice as it literally acts as a slow poison in your body. Also double your vitamins and mineral intake as you body poorly metabolizes everything which is largely why you got such a chemical brain imbalance in your brain that got you institutionalized as a kid.
Trust me you never want to spend Christmas in a stray-jacket and miss most of the 6th grade, it sucks.

You got deep issues with your Dad that will take years to understand, just know he loves you a lot and he shows this through money. Which is why he ditches you soccer games to buy you that Super Nintendo, that just how he shows his love, learn to appreciative it.

Take 6 years to get your engineering degree, that 4 year plan is only a plan to fail given the class burnout rate is over 80%. And remember it the best school because it is hell and they only pass the elites. You can do it, just go slow, and take some low stress summer jobs to off set the lower summer class load and help pay for things.

Get out and meet people, party, take up a complex hobby.

Don't get mad at your family when you get a Car as a gift, turns out you'll need it later in life and not liking it devastates your family in big ways.

>>18560483
dont be a silly fucker, your friend is right, go watch one piece its awsome. and for the love of god quit that shit of taekwondo and start boxing, its better in every way

Don't go to college like a tard

To not burn the bridges I built with my friends as soon as I left high school.

Don't be gay and stop thinking about getting railed by those two hot brothers.

>>18560527
this.

as well as..

dont be such a fucking coward and speak up for yourself.
be serious about art.

Stop being fat.
Goto gym
Do your homework
Fuck izzy, she wants your D.
Ask Jenny to home coming she wants your D long term.
Go in state for on that full ride.
Goto med school you will hate being a lawyer.

>>18560483
>Stop drinking soda, it's going to fuck up your brain
>Don't sabotage your grades. I don't care how much you like your girlfriend, DON'T. DO. IT.
>That ginger dude you know is going to try and pin the money he stole from his mother on you. Sever ties with the fucker.

>>18560483
Fuck more girls, dont go on 4chan, stop watching youtube, buy Nintendo stocks, work out every other day, pay attention in school, and try to volleyball ball camp asap. Record your 3rd season in college you'll do really good.

>>18560483
go to the gym, and dont drop out.
dont be an autist and talk to girls
dont try to be faithful before your 20s. fuck every woman you can. it doesnt matter.
study.
dont play too many vidya, god dammit. study!
pay attention to red flags, dont ignore them because lucy IS genetically a whore and she may say she loves you but deep down you always knew there was something slutty within her so dont get to attached and take away her virginity, dont waste your chances, you will have many, but take the first one. leave her before you fall too deep for her.
talk to your teachers more, make more friends, focus on yourself, but dont be too selfish. realize your words hurt people and nobody is really your friend for that, they're all resenting you for the shit you said. so apologize before it becomes too late and they betray you. making people feel bad about themselves doesnt make you cool.
and study.

>>18560483
stay in school, don't ruin it for other people by disrupting class, and pay attention. Ask for help. If you've fallen behind because you moved to a different school and their curriculum is two years ahead of your old one, say something. Ask for help!

not that it mattered in the end because after dropping out and studying on my own I got my GED and went to college like everyone else. But I never got to experience highschool or develop proper social skills.

>>18561519
ah fuck you're dead?

Actually try in high school and stop worrying so much about football drugs and girls.

>>18560483
Hang out more with ppl
I could have been laid at least five times before HS ended
Dont be so fucking nice and oblivious to signs
Make your first move on chicks, talk is cheap

Pretty much it, you wise up with age. Just could have been dicking more females thats all. Shouldnt have scured myself of getting ppl preggy. Just wear a condom although it could brk too.


Oh finally:

Take that job at the warehouse. Fuck working at the grocery store. My ass stayed at that min wage job cuz i didnt want to hurt their feelings. Nigga it is a fucking deadass job. Coulda did kt big at the warehouse.

No regrets though.

>>18560483
don't see a doctor for your depression because having the diagnosis and getting on medication will disqualify you from your dream of enlisting in the military to work on intelligence analysis. fix that shit on your own.

>>18560483
Fuck

Don't go to an all boys school
Quit music
Try out for the soccer team
Don't be a pussy
Talk to girls
Make friends who aren't beta
Work out
Stop eating so much
Don't fucking slack off, especially for the SAT and college application
Don't visit /pol/ ever. You will regret it

Don't be so serious, this time is so short. Should've gone out with that first chick that said she liked you cause you actually like her and it's gonna hurt to let her go. Go to the gym, stop drinking/eating so much sugar. Take more showers, I know being depressed all of the time sucks but it helps when you finally get tired of feeling like shit and wanna be normal. Get a job earlier, makes it easier later on. JUST DO YOUR WORK AND DON'T IGNORE THOSE TESTS. You are gonna miss out on honors classes and high grades because you "Dont feel like trying" and fuck yourself for college, please don't do that. Go out with more girls, they are there. They were always there that liked you. Dance with that girl at prom. Trust me she's liked you and will be disappointed when you don't do anything. Or dont idk. Fix those problems with confidence and insecurities first. Cause like I said above, people actually like you and your personality. That's why they talk to you in the first place. Also, learn the guitar/listen to music earlier. Some songs are so good and will help you so much more at that time.

Stop caring so much about morals
Do not try to please everyone
Spend time taking a look at how you look from all angles. People treat you better and respect you more if you are attractive
Stop lying to yourself about your insecurities. Try to overcome them and, if you can't, accept them and grow stronger
Stop being a pretentious little kid
Speak simpler words and phrases
Try making deeper connections with people. Stop having a superficial social life that doesn't fulfill you
Learn to cook properly. Stop mimicinh succesful people and use your brain
Etc etc

> People think you are awesome but not you. So believe more in yourself
> Don't stop exercising
> Stop trying to prove to your family you are a good kid, they already think that
And lastly...
> It's not your fault your parents divorced

>>18561463
that picture is scary as fuck dude. why is it so scary?

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>>18560483
Short BTC and early adopt ETH

>>18560483
Commit suicide before your little sister is born so that you can avoid the guilt that prevents you from doing it later.

>>18562783
The science behind it is that it is completely unnatural or not proportionate, but it also looks like it's smiling, so the brain can't recognize it as friend or enemy. This causes fear in the form of intense confusion and stress for most people, unless you can understand that it is just a picture on the internet and/or is not a real being.

Mama doesn't know best

>>18560483
Most advice you'd give to your younger self are things you'd say to avoid regret or heartbreak, not well thought out counsel. There is little point in trying to communicate with your past self if you are still trying to conciliate, in your own mind, a quiet desperation about mistakes you've made or paths you did not take.

Honestly? Nothing really. I don't really care about regrets, such a worthless thing to do to sit thinking about what things could have been, especially since you can be 100% sure they wouldn't turn how I'm thinking.

I guess do move with your dad would be the only thing.

>>18560483
Don't spend 3 years dodging that bullet

>stop making fun of rape victims in your classes, don't say nice noobs out loud, don't look at the teachers ass all day, and try to actually fucking learn

>>18563202
>And don't make fun of the fat bitch, she is suicidal

STOP
Just study. You're not funny. People appreciate you more when you're not trying to be funny. Stop worrying about impressing G, she's into L anyways. And don't forget to play fighting games, to this day that's the only thing we have going for us

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>>18560483
>man the fuck up, don't get stressed about things you can't control
>cut that hair, it's disgusting
>don't try to be so complex on everything, people will only laugh on your "intellectual" way of speech
>you should've asked that blonde out, now she's getting married, you're never going to know would've that worked between you two
>don't give up on drawing, repetition is the key, not thinking that every piece has to be masterpiece

Lose weight fat fuck.

don't put your dick in the ultrasonic cleaner.

Don't waste your time on that guy you've never even met. He's just another attention seeking guy who's using you. He doesn't have genuine feelings for you. Don't fall for it.

Don't fuck that dude with his parents in the house

>>18563446
>Retconning a guy of his virginity loss moment just out of spite

Anon cmon n`ow

I know you don't try to talk much, but talk even less. Autism can only be contained this way.

>>18563481
Neither of us were virgins when this happened

"Her brother died so go over there and hug her you fgt!!!!"

>>18560514

This.

>Get fit fatty or you will be alone and depressed forever, and at a certain point it'll be too late to change.

>>18562691
No, but there were times when death seemed like a good idea. Having gain more wisdom, such thoughts were very dumb.

Love and happiness are your two priorities right now. College can wait, your parents can make room for your independence and if not we'll years later they will regret losing you

>>18562939
Amen millennial mothers are the reason why we have a bad rep

>>18560483
you need to get ready for a lot of pain and suffering and even though it wont seem like it, in the end it will pay off

you stupid little faggot

>>18560483
Improve your social skills now so we're not struggling to get pussy in our 20's

>>18564423
27
The MGTOW life chooses you

>>18560483
dont start smoking pot

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You hide it well, but you know you can't hide it from yourself, even though you don't know enough yet to understand the why. Look up "HRT." Now.

>>18564443
lol GAY

Don't be a wigger

>>18560483
>Don't be gay and stop thinking about getting railed by those two hot brothers.

So you got spit roasted?

>>18564429
I'm already there, I just still like pussy enough to waste my time on it.

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ask questions in school

>>18564423
Keep self improving. Learn body language, have fun with trial and error. YouTube alpha m.
I believe in you anon

Go to gym, look into fire academy or at least emt. DON'T STICK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY

>>18560483
>Knocks old me's headphone off
"Stop listening to that emo edgelord junk! The guy is going to off himself in a few years anyway!"

study a bit more and lawschool, could have been so easy

Since you feel different and detached from your friends and classmates- realize the only life you cultivated, your private life, will eventually become your public life when you become social again. Cultivate a private life that you're proud of, and don't associate yourself with the things you aren't. This isn't dishonesty. It's the opposite; it's the acceptance of the contradiction of your desires, weighed in a way that considers all sides of the issue- such a way as you can like yourself and eventually socialize yourself with people you truly like.

Paint more and read that drawing book you stupid idort.

>>18560527
This. Also there will be a job offer you will get in the upcoming years, take it.

don't break up with her

Study motherfucker, study a lot

>>18560483
>best advice for your teenage self

All of that stuff people call you "negative" or "edgelord" for is actually true. People are no different than animals, and like a wild dog, a poorly trained person is of no use to you. Your family does not love you. Start faking with everyone, to maximize what you can get out of them. Kiss up to your parents so they give you somewhere to stay while you go to school. Pretend to have found Jesus. Go to church every Sunday so that, if they want to kick you out and force you to drop out of school, they will have to explain to all of their friends and the God/morality they pretend to believe in.

Kill yourself

>>18565077
I already told myself this as a teen but I didn't listen to myself

>>18564957
>All of that stuff people call you "negative" or "edgelord" for is actually true
...and will remain true

>>18562783
My brain felt like it got jolted by electricity when I saw it... it was weird.

>>18560483
"never go to 4chan"

>>18565266
it ain't right

At all costs stop your best friend from meeting his current wife, he deserves much better.

Get more fucking work experience.

>>18562424
>implying you weren't already retarded before going to college

You're not ugly, the moment you leave high school women will find you attractive.

Stop thinking you're the Jester, you have the charm to be the center of attention and no one is better than you

Start that Roth IRA now! So much money has been missed since future-you put it off longer than he should've

Start reading DnD handbooks; you'll think it's too nerdy, but you'll save so much time and have so much fun in the future because of it

There's a girl named Rachel you'll meet in your second year of college. Lay on the romance thick, future-you was too cautious and she lost interest because of it; she's a goddess with an 11/10 butt. You'll thank you later

That's pretty much it

>>18560483
It's all fake. All of it.

Kill yourself.

learn to take responsibility for your issues instead of getting caught up in the blame game. it won´t solve shit to be able to point fingers.

>>18562783
Uncanny valley. It's what >>18562873 this Anon explained.

Stop giving so much of a fuck about what people think. Lift, be you, take your passions seriously, research how to do shit then do it, and most importantly, don't waste time.

I'd say "Like I am right now." but who knows, this may actually help someone.

>>18562873
that's fucking fascinating. thanks dude.

it's just so.. jarring.

>>18560527
This. Or at least be dead serious about what you want to do with it and have internships lined up. Don't go to college because of expectations of others, and don't think that GPA is all that matters. Companies care about networking and gauging performance over your ability to memorize facts because honestly like 90% of jobs don't actually even require a degree.

Stop being so fucking dense, she obviously likes you

>>18560483
Forget music. Technology is where it's at.

Chase girls. You might actually catch some.

You don't have to suffer. You don't have to commit suicide to feel safe and find escape. You're fucking right to hide that emergency runaway backpack. You really are far better off leaving family behind. Here's everything you need to know...

get the cyst removed from your penis now so that you can actually find someone without that anxiety

>>18560483
Give up now. It's not going to get better

Please tell her how you feel

>>18560483

You're jacking off all wrong.

It's not about resisting enough pleasure before you pop, which is all jacking off does, it's about having enough control to give your partner what they didn't know they wanted the moment they want it, feeling them respond and motion for more, and focusing on the pleasure of doing that more than building orgasm. To do that, you have to do what a vibrator can't do.

Stand up. Do dick exercises. Practice throbbing. You know how you can twitch a certain muscle and make your dick pull backwards a little bit? Practice that. Tie a little weight onto your dick and flick it up. When you do cum, cum for distance. Do Kegels.

Also work out and go on a diet so you can reel in women with your hot twink body. Most women will still be into Adonises but Link-esque boys are the fucking future.

>>18560483
Those teachers and elder telling you to take advantage of all those opportunities weren't fucking kidding.

Be adventurous.

Do better in school.

People apparently loved your personality and you made a bigger impact on people's lives than you thought. You'd have had more help with your depression if they'd known what you were dealing with.

Love yourself like you love everyone else.

Break up with her
Go to the gym
Don't go to college
Take that bond money and get linux certs
Stop driving so fast you retard
Get drunk, it's not as scary. It's actually pretty fun.

>>18560483
It doesnt get better.

Forgive your parents, and let them know you love them.

>>18560483
Go to the dentist
Buy bitcoin
You will never be happy

>>18560483
break up with him and stop dating boys like him and date people that are nice to you, fuck.

stop trying to be cool because you're not and thats okay because it didn't matter anyway, all the cool kids become druggies and djs that live with their parents

have some god damn self respect

stop lying to your therapist

sports and grades are your top priority, you would've won championships, probably get scouted to somewhere decent, at the very least, a scholarship, at the very most: olympic try outs. fuck watching that goalie in the olympics make rookie mistakes gets you real fuckin heated later, at least try for the olympics, its a real goal in this underrated sport

>work out
>don't do that threesome
>DON'T DRIVE ON XANAX
>yes the girls in the apartment above you all want to fuck you, go for it
>don't steal from G
>don't go the main branch
>STAY AWAY FROM H's SISTER, she is fucking crazy and will try to get pregnant to get you to stay
>Fuck Kim
>Mike is a total faggot when he's drunk and will try to hit on your girlfriends
>highschool is a total joke, colleges don't give a shit about extra curricular activities
>Tell your mom to go fuck herself
>Stop changing your major, you'll end up in school forever
>Open up a new bank account, where your cunt mom can't touch your money
>Start seeing a psychiatrist, the pills will help
>Remember that nothing in highschool matters and your not going to see your friends again, you won't give a shit

I'm still a teenager but I wasted the years that could've made my entire life go right
it hit me at the end of high school to actually care about grades so I could go into a good college and actually expect myself to pass instead of thinking I'm gonna fail
I know I still have time but I just hate my younger self for polluting my time with smoking weed selling weed and staying out for as much of the night as I could just trying to be something I'm not
I should've listened to all my teachers saying how i should actually try and I'd actually do great in school
And last but not least it shoulda hit me sooner that she probably did have feelings for me even with me making jokes on her appearance she still made an effort to hang around me get close to me and try to be alone with me
I remember when one of my friends was coming over to talk to me and it was me and her she just gave this stare to him like "gtfo I'm talking to him"
Writing all this out is making me want to start up school again this fall

1. Don't care about making others happy, live your life for yourself.
2. Focus on school.
3. Never give up.
4. Crying doesn't make you weak. Neither does showing emotions.
5. Nobody can love you until you learn to love yourself.

beat off less

>>18560483
Heather is going to fuck you.

Don't believe the disinformation, invest in Bitcoin.

Where it turns 100 USD to 1 BTC, you know when to start buying.

1. Don't smoke pot.
2. Ask her out.
3. Don't go to college.
4. Work on your art.

>>18560483
find a job!

Move into the dorms with the normalfags and not an apartment you autist

>>18560483
don't grow up.

buy Bitcoin

>>18562853
Wait what

pull the fucking trigger man, it doesn't get better and you're right about the whole thing

Stay away from drugs, and scumbag "friends" associated with them
Avoid girls with BPD and other disorders. I know tough when you relate to crazy bitches, having issues yourself, but a normie gf will at least treat you right.
Don't go to college yet, your stupid ass isn't ready for CompSci. Go to community college and knock out calculus there first.
You pretend not to give a shit over what people think of you, but deep down you're socially unaware, self-respect is crucial to ending up with friends you can trust.
Your parents care about you, and don't let stupid bpd girl tell you otherwise, just because hers were alcoholics.
Get a job so you can buy things yourself, things that can last, not weed you smoke to forget your antisocial what if lifestyle.

it would be to enjoy life, and stop giving a shit about your old shitty fucking friends and to move on and find better friends. and to stop worrying about what other people think about you, because their opinions are unimportant and irrelevant to you. and to just be free as a fucking bird. (sorry that that was probably fucking hard on the eyes to read.)

>>18560483
Change schools. Don't waste your childhood around the wrong people.