Man problem

>>18556228

just google it.

File: 1491106422417.jpg (16KB, 600x450px) Image search: [Google]

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wait... have you just not relieved yourself for the past ~8 years or what?

sit down, grab the shaft, and just go up and down. maybe mess with your balls or something with your free hand

Don't break the streak now champ

>>18556236
I never really thought about it.
>>18556241
I tried doing that and it just hurts and doesn't feel good.

Buy some lube and a fleshlight

>>18556262
I live with a close female friend and i am not risking her finding it.

> Step 1 grab a knife
> step 2 cut your balls off
> step 3 grab your bloody penis
> step 4 pump up and down till you pass out from blood loss

You likely have some sort of hormonal imbalance. Do you have any pubes? Body hair? Facial Hair? Did your voice ever get deeper?

>think of sexy things, watch porn, whatever gets you properly hard
>once you're hard, wrap your hand around your dick, apply light pressure, if you are cut apply some lube
>now you move up and down, try to picture how a woman would move her head when sucking you off and mimic that motion, it's called "jerking" off for a reason... it isn't 50/50 up and down, you essentially give your dick a good stroke then swiftly get your hand back to do it again
>this should feel pleasurable, if you are uncut the foreskin should move back and forth in a good way
>once you get into it you can play with your balls, play with rhythm, for many men the spot underneath the head with a fold of skin tissue (frenulum) is also very sensitive so try rubbing a wet thumb against that during

>>18556281
Pubes-Yes
Body hair-yes
Facial Hair-A tiny bit

>>18556286
This is good advice. Alternatively, fucking your whole lubed fist is good too, just try not to death grip, death grip will ruin your sensitivity.

>>18556269
Ask her to give you a hand

>>18556306
Not happening, don't want to risk friendship.

>>18556286
Nothing I watched turned me on. I kept getting reminded of the time i saw my mum blowing my dad and I turn off again

>>18556321
Not everyone likes porn, I don't really like it myself. But if you cannot think of anything at all that would turn you on, you have bigger issues to tackle than not knowing the mechanics.

For what it's worth, if you don't have a strong imagination try the subreddit /r/gonewildaudio and look at the top posts of all time. It's just audio like the name suggests and because it's amateur stuff, the vibe isn't clinical and trashy like a lot of porn is.

Wrap your hands (or fingers if your dick is tiny like mine) around the shaft, and stroke it up and down until you start feeling it. Not rocket science.

>>18556328
Tried it but it was boring me so I turned it off.

>>18556346
If you have no clue how to turn yourself on then the issue isn't not knowing how to masturbate but lack of interest in sex.

>>18556348
I never really considered that. Guess i'll have to think about it.

BTW I am autistic if that is relevant at all.

>>18556358
We are all autistic

>>18556228
Does your mum swallow?

>>18556358
I believe you're what is referred to as Asexual. You have no interest in anything sexual, nothing turns you on etc.

>>18556371
I didn't stay long enough to find out.
>>18556372
I thought that was a meme?

If you can live without wanking, there's no need to start. I wish I never did. Wanking and porn creep up on you, from 'don't even really like it that much' to 'I've been sitting in front of my PC for 4 hours doing something shameful instead of going out with friends or preparing for exams'.

>>18556228
Just grab your wiener and beat your nutsack like it's your wife.

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Alright, I don't have a dick to use as a demonstration, so I'm using a banana. Hold it like pic related, and stroke up and down at whatever speed feels good. Baka.

>>18556321
Maybe you're Asexual?

Op, don't listen to anything written in this thread, what you need is a visual demonstration. Google "guy masturbating", and watch only as much of the first video that comes up to get a visual demonstration as you need. If they don't show lube being used, remember to do that when you try yourself.

>>18556372
bad anon, someone could have severe hormonal issues and go under the radar as "asexual

>>18556255
>I tried doing that and it just hurts and doesn't feel good.
Your foreskin (you have it, right?) may be too tense. Just play with your dick for now, stretch the foreskin a bit, more every day.