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Anonymous
Can you explain this bizarre behaviour 2017-07-25 09:48:18 Post No. 18555950
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Can you explain this bizarre behaviour 2017-07-25 09:48:18 Post No. 18555950
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So I met a girl at a meetup a few weeks ago and talk to her a bit. She was nice but I was already (fairly discretely) banging her friend (they are all on foreign internships so just met each other recently). Friend has since gone home and last Saturday I saw this girl again and spent a good hour or so talking to her, we have very similar humour and got on really well. As she was leaving I said we should get a drink and carry on our conversation to which she said yes to. She went for a goodbye hug which I upgraded into making out (in retrospect I feel this was a bit forward but I'm big on not fucking around)
After about a minute she suddenly stopped and pulled back slightly. I asked her if she was ok and she said yes and wouldn't elaborate when pushed; she did a lot of looking around and umming etc. She was still up for the date tho
For the date we just met up at a pub and carried on talking, she was lightly touchy in that she would rest her leg against mine on her own impetus. Afterwards, we went to the park to make out (didn't push for fucking as I thought she needed warning up after last time). Again after a minute she pulled away and did the same looking around thinking thing as before and said she wasn't sure this was a good idea. I said that's fine but how come? After another minute of thinking she suddenly goes 'no, it's ok actually' and then enthusiastically resumes the kissing, is a lot of grinding and stuff as well. After that we said we would meet again soon
What the fuck is going on here? I don't understand her behavior or thinking at all, can anyone enlighten me? I asked if she had a bf back home and she said no
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I will answer your question with a question:
How the FUCK would we know any better than you?
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The problem is that there are so many potential answers as to why, that this question is almost impossible to answer.
It could be as simple as not wanting to have sex for religious or commitment type reasons, or it could be as complicated as her having trauma over some horrible event (like rape or something) happening to her in the past.
My point is, you might need to give us a bit more information.
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>>18555960
>>18555960
Well I'm more hoping for a woman's perspective
>>18555973
Ya I appreciate that. She's not religious, I asked her if she was ok having a short term (she's only in town another month) relationship and she said yes. She didn't freeze up like I would expect a traumatized person to but I don't know anything about that stuff
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>>18556076
Maybe she's just skeptical about diving into a potential relationship. As the previous anon mentioned, she might just be assessing her situation based off of previous encounters with other individuals. You are a foreigner to her, in some retrospect, so perhaps she is just slowly coming to the acceptance that you are a good guy (presumably). Good luck on the next date, and then provide my information.
The next best thing to do would be to ask her about it. Communication is key.
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>>18556115
more* information
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>>18556076
Well she might just only experience the trauma when trying to have sex. The only way to really figure out what is causing the behavior would be to get to know her more.
Seeing as how this is just a short term relationship, it might just be worth it to just keep it friendly and possibly not get sex out of it. Might as well enjoy what you have while you have it, you know?
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>>18555950
I'm guessing she's a sort of asian or possibly fundamentally religious type?
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>>18556115
Ya I mean I've tried talking but she's very evasive as I said. I think I'm going to dial back the pursuit and see how interested she is
>>18556118
Ya I'm trying to become Chad though, going fairly well but still needs work. I want to fug her though wouldn't mind if I didn't at this stage
>>18556175
Spanish and atheist. Asians r uggo
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>>18556226
>Spanish
If she's got highly Catholic parents, there's a good chance she's just a little repressed. But she seems genuinely OK with being sexual with you, it shouldn't be a problem now that she's discovered nothing bad happens when you grind on boys. Just don't push her too hard, she's still learning.
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