Unsure. Uncertain. Unsteady.

CONT.

His positives are that he is genuinely a nice person, he is logical and smart when he wants to be. He is affectionate and king too. Negatives are laziness, abruptness, no manners, fat (been trying to get him to lose weight for years but he keeps stuffing his face with takeaway and elephant sized dinner portions), somewhat boring and forceful.

Now I’ve also met a guy online a few weeks ago. We get along really well, he lived across the other side of the world though and there are 2 issues with my situation with him. He is 2 years younger than me, and he is taking a gap year next year before college, therefore, I will be in my last year of uni next year ready to work in industry and he will only be starting college?
His positives are that he is so gentle, kind, pure, and virginal in the sense of personality. He is very smart and comes from a very intelligent family just like mine (unlike my boyfriends family who is divorced lower class parents with a disabled children and constant family feuds and fights for years)

My questions are:
1) How can I break up with my current boyfriend if he lives with me and my parents? He has no proper way to sustain himself without my family.
2) Should I continue talking to this person I’m talking to online? Our connection is deep, and I feel happy and excited for the first time in 5 years.
3) Am I in the wrong? Am I really stupid?
Please refrain from talking about my position in past tense like what i SHOULD have done, there’s so many things I should have done to prevent all this. Now I need to know what i SHOULD do. I can’t keep living like this every single day for years.

Thank you,
Apologies for such a long story, I’m very bad at keeping things concise.

Bump. I'd love some advice, thank you

First of all, acknowledge that your online friend is a source of escapism from your current situation. There is not going to be any realistic future between the two of you, for logistical reasons, and even if your did break up with your boyfriend, you may find that your feelings for your online friend have changed because there is no longer the imperative to escape from your stressful living situation. The notion that your 'connection is deep' is pretty farcical.

It's obvious you are not happy, but also you seem slightly entitled. Your boyfriend has a lot of problems which you have very kindly helped resolve but for whatever reason, your solutions have simply to led him into a situation where he's dependent on you. Ask yourself why between the both of you, you didn't try to maintain his independence? The fact you find yourself out of your depth being so heavily relied upon is completely understandable, but by the sounds of things, you're the architect of your predicament.

Overall it sounds like you really can't escape this situation without talking to your boyfriend about how unhappy you are in your relationship. Make it known that you are struggling with the amount of responsibility you feel for his life, and desire more reciprocation. Work out ways for him to be more independent.

>>18534305
Not sure if you're still here femanon but this is a textbook codependent relationship, even worse, from the way you've described him, he sounds like a narcissist. Kick him the fuck out or you'll be stuck with this deadshit drop-kick for the rest of your life, trust me. I was in almost this exact position 3 months ago. You're not his caretaker and his shortcomings aren't your responsibility. He's old enough to at least try to make a living on his own, he's not your parents child so they have no obligation to take care of him either.

As for the person online, keep talking to them if you want to.

You're not in the wrong AT ALL. You've been emotionally manipulated by this cunt and you're not stupid for asking for advice. Just be strong and get rid of him whichever way you can as soon as you can.

Godspeed.

>>18534305
Also just an add-on to my last comment, there will be no reasoning with your boyfriend so don't bother. It'll be cyclical. Guillotine the relationship and don't turn back.

I am still here. Thank you for your suggestions and observations so far. They've actually brought me to tears, I've been in so much back and forth pain for a year or two now.
Thank you.

You met when you were 15. As total kids. How many such relationships last? Very very few. Think about the future, will you be happier with or without him? Forget the past. Look to the future.

>>18534532
I can imagine, it's a fucking terrible position to be in. It feels like a deadweight yet somehow there are still small moments of comfort where the shitty parts go away, but it's only temporary, right?

I'll hold hope for you, honey. Please make sure you do something about this though, don't let it continue for another year, it's not worth it. He doesn't and won't benefit your life in any way and if by some chance you two end up having a child together, you'll be tied to this guy for the rest of your life. Speak to your parents about this if you need to, including how he treats you when things are bad. If he needs to move back in with one of his parents, so be it. But just gather his things, leave them outside and make him leave too. I can guarantee you he'll find somewhere. It's highly unlikely that he'd sit out the front for a week begging to come back in.

Thank you everyone.