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Long time lurker, first time poster - I'm desperate. I'll try to keep this as short as possible.
I (mid 30's, healthy, rarely a masturbator but will on occasion) met, fell in love with, and married the woman of my dreams (mid 20's, absolute knockout sex vixen). We are the literal interpretation of that sickeningly lovey couple who is always heart eyes and touchy-feely that makes everyone gag. She is absolutely gorgeous - tattoos, long dark (and colorful) hair, medium brown eyes that I find myself getting lost in, and her body deserves a sculpture to commemorate what she has going on. She is such a loving and caring person, funny too. Her family loves me and my family loves her. She is so smart. Everything is soooo perfect, except for one thing...
About 4 weeks ago I have started having a problem staying erect. We will start getting into things and I will get hard, and then it just goes away.
She and I had a streak of *the* best sex ever. It was the best time of our lives, then this problem happened literally almost overnight.
Now, we CAN have sex. And it's not a problem once we are actually having sex - in fact, I can go all night once we start, and she often complains that it lasts too long. But the problem is that I just lose the erection before sex sometimes and I don't have any clue why.
It has ruined her self image because she thinks it's her and it's soooo not. It has ruined my self esteem and confidence. I am terrified to even try to start anything because I'm afraid it's going to happen again.
I'm begging ANON, please help me out. Suggestions? Concerns?
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Tell your doctor your peepee doesn't work and they'll give you either viagra or cialis, it's very easy
In my experience, Cialis is way better as you take one pill and you'll have no trouble with erections for the rest of the day and even the next day, while viagra you have to take before sex and it doesn't last as long.
The problem could also be completely psychological, as it was for me. When I first tried to have sex as a teenager I was too nervous to get a full erections, and from then on I was too scared that I wouldn't be able to get hard, so I wasn't able to get hard. Boner pills got my confidence back up.
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>>18531056
There are all sorts of innocent physical causes, so have a complete physical to see if anything is amiss. If it's not physical, it's mental. Stress at work? Problems at home? Sex too predictable?
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First of all, the both of you need to stop making it personal as if either of your bear some kind of responsibility.
From the way you're describing it, MAYBE it has something to do with what you're doing (diet, stress, something psychological, dunno) but it's more likely that there's a medical reason.
You're also 30, so in a sense it's also more natural for your libido to fall a bit. During my early to mid/late 20's I could get horny at the drop of a hat. Now it's something that I kind of have to get into the mood for - it's not difficult, per se, but there are more specific triggers and such.
As another anon said, just go consult a doctor and get a professional opinion. And for fuck's sake, talk to your wife about it too.
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OP here...
Firstly, my wife and I have spoken open and honestly about it multiple times. She is assuming it's just stress or I am just psyching myself out.
Me? I am unsure. I think that maybe it is time for a physical *anyway*. I might just go ahead and go that route then go from there. I'm pretty bad at handling stress, so I will try to work on that in the meantime. Maybe some meditation or yoga or something.
I'd hate to think it's already time for pills in my mid thirties, but looking at it, I have been kind of run down and haven't been motivated like usual - so maybe I've had a drop in testosterone levels or something. But I would like to get even a shred of confidence back.
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