Eating Disorder Recovery

>>18527673
How I see it anon, you should continue dating her. You yourself said that you want your relationship to continue.

Also put yourself in her shoes, once she'll start recovering she might need your support to make sure she doesn't fall back into the disorder again. I don't think she'd want you to leave at such a important time.

>>18527673
Well, a relationship with someone like that is probably doomed, *but* I don't see why breaking up would necessarily help. Relationships don't have to be intense and serious. You two can date each other without thinking of marriage and all that.

>>18528600
This anon has a good point. Having someone to turn to for emotional support is healthy, and so is sex.

>>18528634
>>18528600

That's kind of what I've been aiming at for best case scenario. I doubt that we'll make it to marriage or anything, but neither of us are ready to give up on the relationship. My main concern with that one though is how much of the relationship was genuine and how much was her just latching on to someone cause of the disorder.

>>18528681
If you just want her to like you, then her having sex with you is probably indication enough. If you want to know whether or not she loves you or considers you someone she would marry, then you're getting too deep into it with someone who has a 'mental disorder.'

>>18528699
Thanks, thats probably the best bit of commentary I've heard.

ED recovery is pretty much life long. It's not like she'll ever be 100% cured. Say you guys do get back together when she's better. How are you both defining "better"? Weight restored? No ED behaviors, and if so specifically which ones? Not exhibiting negative self talk? What's the plan for if she relapses?

>>18529040
She has never really liked to talk about it too much. The whole residential care deal has her pretty freaked out, but I think the main goal is to be independent and content with who she is and her body. I'd like to hope that the doctors she'll be with will help her with a plan for if she relapses, and if we do end up back together, I'll probably try to talk to one of the doctors about what I could do to help her not relapse.

>>18529088
What is her eating disorder?
I meant specifically your plan for if she relapses; what you would do. Since you guys aren't together due to the disorder, I was wondering what would happen in your relationship if she fell back into the disorder.
I will admit that I don't understand why you can't be together while she recovers. But I'm biased because I'm also more vocal about my own eating disorder, am self-motivated to recover, and my boyfriend is well equipped to support me without sacrificing himself, as he works in therapy and went through AA.

>>18529311
Currently while she's in residential care she's pretty much cut off from the world. She can have family visits and thats it. If I could be there some way to help and support, I would.
As for what I would do if she were to relapse again, I honestly don't know. She'll be in treatment for at least a month from what she's told me so I have some time to think about it at least. Any advice on that front is welcome.