GIOYC

>>18510385
My ex is talking to another guy already 2 months after our break up.

The thing is I wouldn't have mind and I didnmt until I found out I vaguely knew the guy. Hes a friend of a friends friend. Its such a flimsy connection but it bothers me so much. I saw her hanging out with another guy and it didnt bother me but I don't know why this guy that I only know vaguely and have never spoken to bothers me so much just cus I know who he is.

What is wrong with me? Why does this shit bother me when if you just change a few details of me not knowing the guy it doesnt bother me as much?

>dad peer pressures me into drinking and driving
>i've been drinking a bunch at home to try and up my tolerance so my dad doesn't make fun of me when we hang out

i know he'd be fine if I didn't want to drink, but I know he'd also be disappointed and think I was a failure, which isn't how I want him to see me in his final years of partying.

https://youtu.be/Kk3tdMS8-s4

I know you read the messages I sent to you, please reach out already. This is the longest we haven't talked, could we please be on speaking terms again? I fear the longer this goes on the harder it will be for us to remain friends. This distance is not helping me at all like you think.

I just want to be a hot bitch.

Is that really too much to ask for?

I want it noooowwwwww

People who've been bullied and socially ostracized in their lives are usually the worst people IMO. Not the bullies themselves, surprisingly. Many people in online communities were the kids who got bullied in class and had no friends, ect, and by god, they are fucking AWFUL.

>>18510481
there's surgery for that

Advice if you got it!

So I've met this girl (big surprise eh?)

I've actually known her for quite some time now, I am a slow woer but we've been to some dates now 7-8 of them and it's been going great!
Especially the last 2 dates were "move-worthy-dates": First night at her place for dinner and drinks, she wanted me to stay when I was leaving, so I did, then she asked me to stay again when I was leaving about 3 hours later despite the time beginning to be closer to 01 in the morning: I could see in her eyes just pure affection towards me, dear god! I wanted to stay: I didn't, now calm down I have reasons, 2 of them to be exact: The first being I had to work the next morning (small issue), second reason: She was going away on vacation shortly after this date for 6 fuckin' weeks and I didn't want to make the move and then she's gone.

But in desperation, I guess, she asked me out again, the night before she was leaving: she didn't want to spend that night with family or friends... she wanted to spend that last night with me! > I feel honored.

But that second night oh man, she so wanted me to kiss her, there were so many moments were I could've done it and I'm confident that it would've worked! But again: She was leaving so I blueballed myself and let it be.

She later texted me:
>"I am really going to miss you Anon, I always look forward to seeing you, days ahead of our plans, Thank you so much for listening and always being there for me!"
>That sounded less cheezy in my head, I'm sorry to put this kind of pressure on you: but please don't change while I'm away! I needed to say that before I leave. You are the best person I know <3.

So... to me that seems like a declaration of love?

I instantly regretted not making that move when I got that message.
She's been gone for about 3 weeks now and I miss the shit out of her!
Did I fuck up?

>>18510514
yes you did, but its ok it seems she is in love with you
if she comes back, u need to fuck her
aaaand...

you got a bitch.

>>18510529
She is coming back in 3 weeks

>>18510385
I'm fat and ugly. It is the source of 90% of my problems and I could change... But I don't. I have nobody to blame but myself. My willpower is gone and I can't blame any woman for finding me repulsive. I spend my money on whores just to have some female attention. I'm broke every month and living paycheck to paycheck even though I have an arguably good paying job. I'd probably kill myself if I wasn't such a pussy and afraid of death. So, I committed to killing myself slow through being fat and eating like absolute shit. I hate myself.

>>18510532
ok anon thats good, but when she comes back stop being a pussy and fuck her ass.

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I paint a lot. Kinda. This is only a fraction of my works.

I want to put together a universe like thing. Fantasy, occult, FUN!

How do I stop reflecting on the past and being angry about it. How do I forgive and move on?

If you've been friends with a person for years, but now they mostly ignore you for several months? We don't even talk outside of one word answers on social media anymore. Are we still friends? Or have we moved on
I want to unfollow and unfriend you, but I feel bad about it. I am almost certain you will call me out on it, but at the same time, I doubt you will notice.

>>18510514
This is adorable. She's infatuated with you, it's obviously too early to be love, but it's still a good thing.

>>18510641
Times change, man. Just keep 'em as a contact.

I've gone over a year without saying much to some of my best friends I've had, and am still best friends with today.

GRIMES

Are you my future girlfriend? What about Bree? What about Maria?

What about Jasmin? She's a good Christian girl. She's also autistic like me. I actually would really like her too.

Are you guys fighting over me?

Why can't you all just come and live with me? We can start a band. We can start an art studio.

We can all go out together. Shopping, arcades, movies, observatories, aquariums. zoos! We can go to the range.

What about Katy? Can she be my gf?

I want to make hot hot music.

You all already know the 1 rule everyone should follow.
1. Jace is always right.

So, why the fuck are we not starting yet?

Does anyone else eat cereal the way I do? I keep my milk in a cup and pour in just enough to eat so it doesn't get soggy. When I run out, I just pour a little bit more in. I also keep my bowl tilted towards me so the milk stays on one side.

I fucking HATE soggy cereal.

>>18510678
>pour cereal
>pour milk
>eat cereal
>drink milk
>repeat until satisfied.

But I ain't no slouch when it comes chow time.

I recently learned that my boyfriend has bisexual curiosity tendencies (he isn't always convinced himself that he likes men) and I'm scared that I'll lose him. How can i continue to support him while also not risking our relationship?

>>18510747
Don't worry about it and just be a good gf?
There is a world of difference between reading trap doujins and sucking a cock.
Being curious can be anything from jerking it to gay stuff, to just thinking about it, but it's a long way for sticking a dick up your ass.

I want this to be over. I just want to start my life. I WANT. TO. LIVE. MY. LIFE.

I don't want to go to a concert with children. I know girls like to see me with kids because it's cute but still. I'm too miserable right now.

You guys realize that's why I don't do anything right? It's because you've made me fucking miserable. You want to see me cook, you want to see me go out, you want to see me be a "dad" but you ignore how fucked up I am because of you assholes. I'm EXTREMELY depressed and you won't acknowledge it. You get confused why I don't do anything but isn't it fucking obvious? You stole my life from me. You took away my medications. You made it so I can't get any money. You cut me off from the world so I can't talk to any of my friends.

I told you I would at least get out if you gave me my medications back but you refused. So... way to go.

I'm not your fucking entertainment. I don't care about being popular. I don't give a shit about wanting to sleep with any women.

I want to be free. I want the truth. I want what you owe me.

In afraid of what I've become. I don't want to feel this way towards kids. What if I can't control myself, what if I let go. I dont know what to do, can this be treated?

In one more week, we can meet and I am nervous, excited, and just ready. Meeting internet friends make me nervous because I am probably not what they imagine.

But I am really excited to meet you.

I just want to know more about you.

H,

Why can't I just let go of you? It kills me slowly every day just dwelling on it. I want to believe we can still make it work. I want to believe that you still love me enough to try again. I know I can be what you want. But I just don't know if you're what I need. I keep telling myself I want you and that I don't want to let go of you. Maybe it's because I feel like I'll never meet anyone better than you. I really felt we could have had a great life together. But when you said you just couldn't see yourself marrying me. That shattered me into pieces. I don't know what to do with that. I don't know how to move on. I don't know what to think, and I hate feeling like a pathetic loser because if it. I don't know how long I can stand this. I guess I just hope you made the right choice. I hope life is going better for you. It's been rough for me. And it kills me even more to not know what's going on in your life. I just want to talk to you again but I know it's too early. I miss you so much. I hope you miss me too.

>tfw I'm never going to start living my life
>tfw I will never find my calling
>tfw poverty

>>18510762
Who took your medication away? Why?

I'm getting the bad urge to tell him I like him, but if I do that will just fuck everything up.
Even though it's just to get it off my chest and make it so it's not bothering me anymore. It would be inappropriate of me to do it.

>>18510801
>basically me

>neet for about a year
>will land an office job in a shitty business that feeds on other people's misfortune
>afraid it will make me miserable but literally don't have any alternatives since I put myself in debt in my homecountry

Figure it out anon, asap. I ran out of options so i'm just doing what I have to right now

>>18510823
If he has a girlfriend, don't do it, he will likely tell her and I assume he will choose her over you (because he did in the first place) after she becomes uncomfortable with the fact.

>>18510823
i hear that

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I'm worried I won't be able to have great opportunities like extra-curricular activities because I have to car pool over an hour to the college everyday (I get home at 6pm-ish. I'm worried that because of it, I won't be able to get into a great grad school program despite my good grades and being bilingual (I'm an American, so that's pretty good). I can't even do something during the summer because I have to babysit my little sister while my mother is at work. I don't have anything on my resume.

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Why is it so difficult to find a woman willing to use a butt plug so I can pull out and cum while fucking her ass

If I have surgery to change my voice to female will I be able to sing better?

I would love that so much. To sound like a pretty lady too.

I want it.

Oh little girl you weren't suppose to fall in love.

What are you doing?

>>18510837
He is single.
It's me that is taken.
That's why it's extremely inappropriate and why I would do it if it wasn't the wrong thing to do.

Question:
Do ya'll like my butt dances?

>>18510944
NO

>>18510940
What kind of weird situation is this, give us a backstory

>>18510944
I do!

I met a friend I've known online for 7 years in person this week. He and I met through a 4chan thread of all places. We live on different continents and I was only here for a few days. This is like simultaneously meeting someone new and losing someone dear to me all in the span of a week. I can't describe what it was like spending time with this dude; it was so natural and freeing. No secrets, no barriers. He's a genuinely good person.

I can't stop focusing on the feeling that we may never see eachother's faces in person again and it's making me unbelievably sad. I keep crying and I can't sleep because I keep wishing we had more time together. I'll probably never have a friendship like this again; this fucking sucks.

Just needed to vent I guess... P, you are a beautiful, gentle soul and as strange as it sounds to say it, I love you dearly.

>Start looking at laptops
>Not an apple guy, but just for due diligence's sake, start looking at macbooks
>Fucking weak-ass dual-core processors
>Minimal RAM
>256GB HD only
>OVER $1,200
Why the fuck do people buy this shit??

>>18510964
>have nice bf
>rocky situations occur
>try leaving him
>develop feelings for his best friend
>too painful to leave him
>come back, we get along fine again
>feelings don't go away
>start feeling easily attracted to a couple other people
>wtf brain
>refuse to cheat or tell others how I feel
>inner turmoil
>only drop subtle hints, unconsciously of course
>hate self

So like... my life plays out in chapters? Is that SERIOUSLY WHAT WE ARE FUCKING WAITING FOR?
>>18510962
deal with it
>>18510985
<3

MORE BUTT DANCES FOR EVERYONE

>>18511058
Twerking??

>>18510907
initials?

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>>18511065
just shakin'
>>18511068
[pic related]

What does it mean to be over someone?
How do I know when I'm over my ex?

>>18511043
>>too painful to leave him

from what you're saying it sounds like its time to break up but the fear of the pain is holding you back.
unless you really want to commit and continue down a long term relatoonship with its ups and downs, you should start breaking up.

>>18511031
Why do you think?

i wish that the first time we broke up was the last. getting back together only made things worse. i had already fallen out of love but i was afraid of hurting you. i've moved on but i feel like you're still stuck in the past.

I'm watching split and you guys have got to be fucking kidding me.

You hired that actress for a reason. Specifically for me. She's literally everything I adore in a girl. Her eyebrows and brow shape is just like Maria's. She has big ol' fish eyes that are further apart than normal and exactly the shape I talk about all the time, a cute round button nose, a bow-arch mouth, pointy little butt chin, and a heart shaped jawline. She also has long wavy hair like Maria (and me) and dresses like a 90s emo-hipster.

Only thing you got wrong is that she's over 18 (olloololololol)

Also, she doesn't have green eyes. Almost though!

It's a little obvious you're getting sick of me... But I physically can't leave.

>>18511078
Do it, post it, link it, bb!

>>18511086
When you no longer harbor the desire to date.

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So I reconnected with a friend I dated after about 3 months of silence (she sucks at texting and she seemed to get worse at the end). We had some amazing chemistry and literally nothing bad happened between us. We were both happy and comfortable in each others' company, in sex and mutually mentally stimulating as well. After trying to reconnect with her, she's ghosted me a couple of times over the last 2 weeks and has taken ages to reply with short sentences, avoids casual flirtations, ignores all of our previous in-jokes and all that. I'm 99% sure she doesn't have a new guy as she moved back to poland and is unemployed (not to mention she's hopeless with guys). I had tried an attempt to get her back to talking to me and she got the message that it's a two-way street. She needs to actually make conversation. But I have little hope for it. She even said "it's been a while so you might have to grow on me again", to which I called her out on due to it sounding one-sided, but she dropped it immediately afterwards.

So much so I actually pre-wrote a goodbye message a few minutes ago. I'm going to try my best, give her until the end of the month (2 and a half weeks, more than fair) with not going more than 2 days between talks. See if she warms up to me again, that sorta thing.

Any advice?

/adv/ should be split in two. One for relationship shit, one for everything else.

>>18511086
>What does it mean to be over someone?
You no longer have emotions towards that person.

>How do I know when I'm over my ex?
You no longer have romantic feelings towards your ex. You're able to think about them unenthusiastically

>tfw I know how to solve every single one of my problems but I don't because I have absolutely no control over my impulses or emotions

>>18511087
>you really want to commit and continue down a long term relatoonship with its ups and downs, you should start breaking up.
so a real relationship?

>>18511087
The attraction to other people is sort of like a forbidden fruit temptation and while I can definitely control myself, it is bothering me. To the point where I'm secretly hoping his friend also likes me. If this gets any worse, I may not be able to salvage the relationship.

>>18510392
My first gf which i dated for 6 months dumped me and 1 week later she went to celebrate carnaval with her new bf. My self-asteem never got so crushed. Butfuck 'em, there are good girls out there.

Did J get in trouble for what I said to my manager? About the sexual harassment I saw?

What happened? Did she get fired because of that? Did she sue?

I wanted to help her but I didn't know what to do. I just mentioned it to my manager. You could tell she wanted no part in it.

I still don't know everyone calls me a misogynist. I think they are just trying to get under my skin because whenever I ask for a reason they never give one. I adore women and I get along with them so much better than I do men. While I appreciate their beauty I never associate their looks with their value as a human being. I never make inappropriate remarks. There have been so many times when other guys try to get me to say something perverted about the other girls at work and it just makes me so fucking uncomfortable. I do my best to ignore them when they do that.

I've never tried to flirt or hit on a girl while at work even if I really really wanted to. It's just not the place or time for it. I wouldn't do it when I was in school either. I don't understand how people can do that. Don't they have any respect? It's so gosh darn awkward.

I can't wait for this to be over. I miss my friends, I do. I don't know why I shut down and exclude everyone from my life at times. It just becomes too much. So much goes wrong in my life and I can't handle it.

>>18510385
Can't you at least stop trying to mess with me? I get it... just don't constantly rub it in my face. What am I supposed to do? What do you want? I'll do whatever...

>>18511193
Just leave your bf. If he's been loyal and worked past those issues, he deserves better than a person that is looking to jump ship the moment her ankles get wet.

Also, beware of the grass on the other side, it's never as green as it looks.

>>18511204
Story?

I don't hate you, I couldn't. I'm pretty much over you and everything that we were. Honestly, we could have gone so much further together, that'll be in another lifetime. Good luck my friend, make me proud.

>>18511220
We're not friends you egotistical nigger

>>18510385
I'm getting married soon and don't have any friends I would ask about this, but since we are both going in as virgins, we don't really have much experience.
Neither of us are very fond of the idea of her taking the pill, so are there any other relatively safe contraceptions that are not condoms?
If there are none, are condoms really making it that much worse? And how do I find out whether or not the normal sized ones fit, or do I just have to buy a pack and then see if it fits or not?
Probably mostly stupid stuff that I could google, but I prefer asking like this

>>18511221
Spent your welfare check yet faggot?

I wonder who V loves.

>>18511031
Well I don't know the reason now, but back in the PowerPC processor days, it's because it took less RAM to run efficiently. Never understood why they dropped it, if they did.

I WANT TO GO HOME

I want to be a fish-eyed girl. They are so pretty. Why are they so pretty? Emma, Ryonen, Gemma, Anya, Seyfried... why couldn't I have been born like that?

I want to be happy. Please, let me be happy. Tell me what the fuck is going on. Let me have the surgeries already. Just get on with it. PLEASE.

please...

Why are you doing this? why can't you let me be happy? Why can't you talk to me? What the fuck could you possibly be doing that makes this ok? Moral?

START THE GAME ALREADY

>>18511250
Welfare check? You're the one mooching off the government, bud

>>18511253
Why can't it be all of them?

>>18511253
you

>be 21yo college student, living at home for the summer
>have gf who lives in an apartment about 30 minutes from me + work
>she wants me to stay the night all the time
>stay one or two nights a week at the cost of having my parents be angry with me
>they don't stop me from doing it but they admittedly pull a lot of financial strings for me
>not staying with girlfriend puts strain on her and I

How do I strike a balance between keeping my girlfriend happy and keeping my parents happy? In a couple months I'll be moved out presumably for the last time (starting my last year), but in the meantime I need to make sure I don't lose my girlfriend or my connection with my family.

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I don't want to live with my flatmate anymore but we have been friends for a long time and would take it badly. All he does is play vidya and does not try to be social at all. I have a friend who needs accommodation so money is not a problem but I can't just kick this guy out right?

>>18510385
It's funny.

We spent 7 months together. Talking everyday. Getting to know each other, falling in love with each other. You were my first love.

But it's been 2 months since we broke up. And I can't remember much about you. You feel like a stranger to me. I can't remember what you even look like. I think I found you beautiful. I can't remember. I look at the pictures we took together and they look like strangers both you and me.

When people ask me what I loved about you I used to be able to shout from the mountain tops what it was but now all I can say is I don't know.
Your voice, your mannerisms, your touch, everything. It all just seems like a dream or a nightmare, I can't decide.

I feel so empty inside when I think of you.
I say I miss you.
But I feel like crying because I don't remember why I do.

What is this feeling? I've never felt anything like it.

>>18511220
I'm not over you, I want us to try again.

>>18511220
Then if you are over me. Why can't you tell me this directly? What stops you from telling me this? If you are moving on, give me on last gift and tell me this so I can let go as you have.

>>18511273
I feel like what you are doing is ok so far. Staying a few times a week is normal for somebody going to college and living at home... I am sure you could just explain to your GF that you won't be staying at home for much longer and you should not stay at her apartment every night

>>18511264
Aww.

>>18511298
:(

>>18511304
No, I mean adorable/warm aww, not sarcastic/sad aww.

>>18510767
You can fight it Anon... Just don't act.

I wonder if you guys are starting to realize that there is a difference between sexual attraction and artistic appreciation. I can find a girl extremely pretty and not have sexual thoughts about her. It's actually very rare for me to have sexual thoughts about someone.

Do you finally believe me? Why didn't you before? Is it really that bizarre? For a guy to not have perverted thoughts about every girl he sees, especially attractive ones? Are most pineup artists or photographers of women disgusting human beings? They all do tend to have a bad reputation. Using models, pressuring them for sex or making them do things they aren't comfortable with.

Knowing that's how most people are that do what I do gives me really bad anxiety. I see someone with exceptional beauty and I just want to paint them or take their photo. I want to look at them, study the light on their face, the contours of their lips, and the hues of their eyes. Sometimes I see a girl soooo pretty I get goosebumps. I just want to ask them if they could model for me. Then I freak out thinking of how creepy it would look if I did ask. I think about the reputation of those kind of photographers.

Worse, I think about how shitty most people are that call themselves artists. People that spend maybe an hour or two a week doodling in sketchbook. The label of artist is meaningless now. Everyone and their grandma calls themselves an artist. it's embarrassing. It's like someone that occasionally follows a recipe from a cookbook calling themselves a chef. Unless it's your profession or you take it as seriously as a profession... you shouldn't call yourself an artist.

As for my sexuality, I really am (besides a few rare exceptions) demisexual. I thought the term was some SJW bullshit. When I am in love with someone, no one else in the world can match their beauty. I just want to fuck the shit out of them all the time. I do tend to fall in love easily though <3 <# <#

>>18511309
I know, that's why I'm sad

>>18511316
If you're the same caramel goddess I've talked to yesterday, well, I love you as well.

>>18511207
It goes deeper than just the ankles getting wet. We have had a lot of bad issues.
I am happy with him. I respect him. Which is why I'm not going to directly pursue anyone else, even if we end up breaking up. I just have to get a grasp on what this is.

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>28, still live with parents
>have 40-hour job, doesn't pay enough to move out
>have useless degree so can't get anything better
>have a shitton of college loans regardless

Just kill me already.

Wait, were you guys saying DO use the thumb or DON'T use the thumb for flicking?

You know, while sexy time.

Took me a bit, but then I was like "Ah, that's what they are trying to say."

It doesn't fucking matter. I'm never having sex ever again. This fucking shit is never going to end.

>>18511322
Yes, it's me. Thank you. Why are you so sweet? The answer to your initial question is V. He's a V.

Guys I want to send a letter to my ex on her birthday. I just want to say what I didn't get to say and to say goodbye.
She ghosted on me and when i tried to ask her what was going on she told me I was harassing her and that she was afraid of me and to leave her alone.

It's a bit more complicated than that.
It just feels shitty leaving it like this.
These past few months I've been moving on. But I feel like I have to do this.

I know you guys are probably gonna say not to do it. But I'm going to ask anyways.
Should I?

>>18511340
Why was she afraid of you?

>>18511324
Could be fear
Since you have had bad times with your bf, it could be that you fear it could happen again. That you preemptively prepare yourself in case it does. As for why it could manifesting in this desire it could you want stability, you many fully trust your bf as you did. You could be looking at these other males and thinking "maybe this one will be better?". That or you see the work it may take for you and your bf to work well. You mountain too high to climb, so you seek something easier.

ANd if it doesn't work out? Do you act like things are okay between you and him? And what will you do should the time come that you have to pull away?

>>18511330
To be fair, I'm not having sex with R, I, or V. Just nope nope nope.

noooopppppppppeeeeeeeeee

I really don't want to have sex AT ALL. If you guys really want me to do this, the girl that shows up is going to have to be someone very special.

>>18511339
>He's a V
Oh, aww. Sadly, I'm not V.

>>18511348
lol ya, the aw gave it away

>>18511343
I'm not entirely sure. She always told me how she was afraid of what a guy might do to her.

But she told me that she was afraid I was going to come over to her house and hurt her and her family.

I think it's a bit insulting the. I never made any threats and during our relationship I was a crybaby wuss and never got violent. Hell she was more violent than me in the relationship. I don't understand how she could think that I'd do something like that.

>>18511350
Well, just know that my body absolutely thirsts for caramel goddesses

It was nice talking to you anyway. You seem cool.

>>18511351
Do you live close to her?

Can't you be a little more supportive? Like do you really need to drag me down and then say you're being "realistic" when I'm crying out for support? I don't want you to be realistic with me when nothing is going right. Try and lift my spirits or something, even if it's a lie. But if I tell you this you'll just get angry at me and include the word "but" to try and defend yourself in your half-assed apology.

You know, I do want to exercise. Even though it has never ever helped me with my energy levels or depression, I want to get in shape.

However, I just can't right now. I'm extremely depressed, I'm bored out of my fucking mind, and I just want to fucking die. Lastly, I refuse to do anything out of principle. I'm not your fucking entertainment. I'm on strike, I'm protesting.

You need to end this already. You are not trying to help me. You are not actually giving me any real advice. If you truly cared about my well being, about my fucking health, you would end this. You would tell me the truth. You would stop fucking around.

You have nearly killed me already. The anxiety, stress, and sadness you have put on me has given me literal heart disease. You weakened the valves of my heart. You nearly killed me with a literal brokenheart disease.

You also continue to drug me against my will with a bunch of drugs that have had horrible side effects. For a long time you were put THC extract in my food. I don't know why. Maybe you thought it would relax me some? If you dumb fucks would EVER listen to me you would know that weed doesn't do anything for me other than make me dizzy and extremely hungry.

You're also giving me steroids and hormones. I don't know if it's for the HTC treatment or if you're doing it to prevent muscle atrophy but the end result is increased weight gain.

Lastly, the mind fuckery, the games you've been playing with me, and the horrible truths of what is going has really destroyed my mental health. You've also cut me off from the world. The end result is boredom and an eating disorder.

You're not helping me in the least. You've caused me to gain 40 fucking pounds. You've ruined my heart. You gave me insomnia. You've destroyed my mental health. You're fucking killing me.

But "totally exercise!"

fuck you. You know everything I've said is true. You don't fucking care about me. You know exactly what you have to do to help me and you fucking refuse.

watch as my roommate will break my partner's thing and won't feel bad about it and won't apologize for it

I still think about that dream I had. About the woman that said to me "So, you're the reason my daughter dresses like the devil." I wanted to reply "I'm also the reason her knees have carpet burns."

How I would love to feel a girl your age.

I made the choice to cut all communication knowing you can find me. Apparently you can't. I still want to be your friend, but you sharing your life with someone you used to love, that just hurts. Lesrning to cook again? A pain in me says that I won't be able to taste anything you cook. This was when I deleted everything, except for my number. Everything went by so fast I just want you to look for me. Like I said, Im always here for you, but you never bother seeing me again. Was 8 years nothing for you? I want this pain to be gone already and just move on but the longing it reminds me I truly love you.

I really did love you. I wanted us to be a couple. I will never forget you.
But you hurt me too many times and the distance is killing us.
I won't have any bitterness in my heart, I care about you no matter what and only wish you well.

I'm so sorry for everything. My heart just can't take more pain.. I love you. I miss you. I wish.... our dream happened instead of this.

>>18511542
Its never too late.

>>18511542
Why did you lie? Then lie to cover up those lies

I don't understand how people can make such intense commitments. I can understand loving someone, and the emotions that go with that, but I am terrified at the idea of a commitment as small as moving in together, and making choices on where to live together in the future and moves of that nature. Having to plan your life around if someone can move with you is insane, and beginning to look at that as a reality is freaking me out.

>>18511560
That's how it feels for everyone. You're starting to realize what it takes when people say "You need to be strong" for this sort of thing.

>>18511560
It's just another step in life. It sounds like you're afraid of change, which is normal. Accepting change as a part of life and not something to be feared would prove to be very valuable to you.

My mom, father, and brother murdered my GF.

They slit her throat and tried to bury her in the basement (where the wall had collapsed.)

They are going to prison after this is through. My Brother already is though. They are trying to hide it from me.

My father tried to poison me.

All for money.

>>18511568
To be honest I was ready for change. I made a career change and a move wasn't too far away, but now taking someone else's life goals and preferences into account has me completely off balance.

>>18511542
I kinda figured you would write something like this here. Instead of telling me directly. A part of me isn't surprised, but it hurts the same nonetheless because I still have so much inside for you.

If you no longer love me, so be it. As much as I want you, am I not the sort to try to keep you contained. I still want to be with you and I can't forget you, even if I tried. I would sooner blow my head off before that. Maybe that's why I own a gun now. Just to give me that way out.

Yes, I hurt you and perhaps it was too much for you take. A lot has happened in the months since. A lot has changed in the ways I look at things around me and the way I look at you. But my love for you remains. That's why I been pushing and trying to patch things up. Why I been keeping up with your game of small talk. I don't want to simply chat, nor do I just to be a stranger to you. There is distance, but I can tell you fear closing that gap, I can see it and feel it. There are a few times when I dream about you, and I can hear your voice and see your face clearly. I hate those dreams so much because I know immediately that they are scenes from a false reality. Because when I am awake, I am filled with nothing but a feeling of loss and grief.
You don't have to let me go to release the bitterness, just as much as I don't have to let you go in order for me to change and grow up. I still care about you, not sure if you believe me anymore, but I still do. Reality is wishing won't solve anything between us. Only communication will. Only working at it will. Wishing me well is just that. Wishing.

I am sorry for the immature jerk I became, and for not seeing how it hurt you. How it change you over time. If I could go back and be this way for you then, I would give up anything for then chance. I love you too, and I miss you more than anything. And a dream is still a dream until we work at it and make it real. Don't give up. Please.

I think I'm becoming overly protective of you and way too invested in your wellbeing. I'm not sure if it's because I'm developing deeper feelings towards you or because you're a bit younger and my instincts kicks in. And I don't know what's worse too. Damn

>>18511344
You may be right about that. He also has a really fucked up life that he isn't trying as hard as he can to get together so that may play into it.

>>18511584
>taking someone else's life goals and preferences into account has me completely off balance.
And it's that bit that makes it a massive change, and one to be feared. When you're making changes that only affect your life, they're much easier than changes that affect yours and others'.

Take break-ups or divorces, for example. They're very very tough changes to go through.

>>18511585
Initials?

>>18511592
As a guy. I have to say that sometimes we do need a good kick in the ass to change. Change isn't easy. I wish it were, maybe I wouldn't be in the spot I am now. You remind me of my ex. Being that I fucked up in not seeing that I needed growing up to do, that I had stagnated and in turn pulled her into the stagnation as well. We don't do it on purpose, at times we don't realize we did it as well.

Have you tried telling him all this? Some may not take it well, but you may need to be that kick to his ass to get him moving again.

Once you fall in the pit you look for ways to get comfortable. You give into it because climbing out is fucking hard.

>>18511598
I have my doubts and I hope it's not you. Because if it is, we need to talk like two people, love. Not like this, but face to face. There is much to talk about. Much that is lost in just text.

-LM.
And you anon?

One day we may be forgiven

I went to a concert by myself today.
I had fun, but I couldn't stop thinking about how I would have liked having a gf to share it with like I did with my ex.

I feel like I'll never be fully satisfied with anything I do by myself.

>>18511542
Is your initial a H?

There are many different kinds of love out there and I found yours to be the most beautiful one. Being in love with you and sharing my feelings with you, talking about anything, moments of bliss just being with you. I was happy. Basking in the love you provide as I love you back. It wasn't perfect but it was ours. So I'm wrapping my head and thinking why would you cheat?? Why would you fall out of love? Why woukd you lead me on for 8 months? You say its because you're not you anymore. Yes we can change but anything that drastic?? Its a bit much? You could have told me, I was always beside you. Well that's over and we started healing, away from each other.

But I always remember you. Accepting one at their lowest? I did already the first time you told me. Now you've pushed me away. I'm not what you need right now. Is it hard to communicate a bit with me? Or being your friend now would be wrong? It feels empty when I think of you. You're okay now and thats because you had a head start. I'm still coping. Have you no empathy?

I believe in what you were and what you can be. Yes, start with you but I'm afraid when you find yourself I might not be there anymore. You know how long I waited, now I have to wait again? I'm looking for stability, a commitment I could share my life with. I really thought ours would be it.

I won't try to suppress anything. I'll live my life as you do. No assurances. I love you now, we made plans, I'm lost. My head is just in chaos I can't write properly. All I know now is I need to start with me.

>>18511611
W.S. is what I go by.

>>18511604
When I broke up with him for a week recently it seemed to kick him in the ass a bit but it went away and now he's not doing anything anymore. Theres only so far you can take the anxiety excuse.
I had it and I still pushed myself to get shit done. I have a well paying job.

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I wonder how many people sued me for using their photos as reference.

I wonder if they realize that's not how copyright works.

I use multiple photos per painting. I do the sketch, go through a bunch of my saved images to find photos that are similar to the sketch, and then collage them to make a complete reference. Literally every artist does it. I never make a 1-1 copy. In fact, unless you KNEW the photo I used as reference you would never even be able to tell. The only way these people could have noticed is if they were violating my human rights.

They all would fall under fairuse
>Has the material you have taken from the original work been transformed by adding new expression or meaning?

>Was value added to the original by creating new information, new aesthetics, new insights, and understandings?

There is also the whole "For educational purposes." thing. I post all my art on my Patreon to give beginners a look into my process.

Morally... come the fuck on guys. You know they look absolutely nothing like the photos, nor is it cheating. Literally every artist that has ever lived uses photos they find as reference for their paintings.

I'm going to have to deal with a whooollleee bunch of horseshit when this is over. There are going to be A LOT of people clamoring for my money. People are greedy little fucks.

I pirated a lot of things, that's true. Then again, I have literally no money right now. They aren't losing anything sells. The biggest one, however... if I didn't even have basic human rights then why do you think I'm affected by any other laws?

I'm not going to address anything I have done in the last 30 years. That shit is long gone.When I become reborn, nothing I said before can be held against me. You had to violate me in order to even know I said those things. SO again, if anyone tries to interview me I'm not going to address any controversial, or really anything, I've said in the past.

Suck my dick
I'm a shark.

All I want is a date with a pretty girl to forget my ex. Is that too much to ask for? Should it really be this hard? I'm having zero luck with dating apps and idk how to meet girls. It was a miracle that I met my ex.

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>>18511635
Ah, then you aren't mine.
This is fine. It's okay. I can continue to delude myself if just for a few more days.

>>18511645
Are you me? I'm in exactly the same situation.

>>18511645
>>18511662
You'll both get there. It can take some time but you will find new girls.

>>18511657
Good luck, L.M. I have seen your posts the past few days and hope you find what you're looking for. -"W.S"

>>18511638
And you went back to him?
No, a week isn't enough.
It took me months to completely break myself down and analyze the steps that I followed to get myself into that pain.

Look, if you do love this guy. And you want to help him. You have two routes. One you leave him completely.

Two, sit down and talk to him. "The harder the truth, the truer the friend that tells it." You tell him what you must. Be completely honest with him and tell him what his current state makes you think of him.

If he values you, he will bite back his anger, look past is own ego, and work on the parts that aren't good to himself.

We don't change from being coddled. we change from stress, and pain. We either learn from the wisdom of others or from our own painful experience.

Show that you trust him and don't want to lose him because of it. Talk, be direct, and hold back emotions when you do. Communicate like adults. Should he get angry, allow him time to cool off, but do not give up. Neither side should shut down. Talk and listen. Try to see what is going on inside of him and why he is holding himself back. You can spark the fire, but only he can tend it into an inferno.

>>18511690
Not the person you're replying to but I want to be your friend anon...

>>18511665
I'd have to make an effort to actually get out of my apartment if I want to make it.
There are so many activities I could do to meet people, but thinking about it overwhelms me and I end up not doing any of them.

>>18511704
Baby steps my friend. Start with one, congratulate/reward yourself for doing it and keep going. Apathy is death and new beginnings come from new things. You can do it.

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>>18510385
I don't have a real counselor yet and need to vent.

My wife left me due to depression. She said she felt trapped and wanted out of the relationship. She didn't feel like trying and refused to go to marriage counseling, though she continues to go to her own personal counseling. I accepted it, and though heartbroken, I moved out and I am trying to move on.

However, a month later, it appears she continues to want to talk to me, tells me she loves me still, and wants to 'get me back'... in 'maybe a year'. Once she has her stuff sorted out. This post was prompted by a drunk text where she offered sex, which I declined, to which she said 'But I need you. Nevermind. I'm just going through something dark'. How to deal with this? I obviously still love her and wait her to get better but I also want to heal...

>>18511690
Yeah, you have a point. I don't want to be with him forever if he can't get a job. For now he's just hinging on this tech support job that he'll need me to drive him to when I get my car.
Yeah he can't drive either. He says he's gonna go for his permit at the same time I do but yeah. This whole situation is fucked.
I went back after a week because I couldn't take the pain of leaving. So if I try to leave again I don't think I could do it unless I'm completely and utrerly sick of the relationship.

>>18511733
I feel like she just wants to explore

>>18511710
Picking one is so hard though, I'm terrible at making decisions.
I'm also scared I'll end up being alone in a corner because I'm too shy to approach strangers.

>>18511744
You have to be honest with yourself. Is what you're currently doing working? If not, then you need to change something, anything, but change something.

Holy fuckin shit! Women can not drive, this is ridiculous.

I wish I could kill all the lazy and corrupt people in the world, they are the real cancer of the system.

>>18511738
>I don't think I could do it unless I'm completely and utrerly sick of the relationship.
Don't do that, you seem to want justification, but in the end it will only hurt you more.
It sounds like you care about him, try to pull him out of it. Try to not look at the grief he may have caused you. Separate yourself from your emotions as you handle this. Try to see this from his point of view and figure out what is causing him to sabotage himself.

You saw something in him when you started. Maybe a kindness or ambition he now lacks, but you saw something that caught your attention. Something you considered special.

You won't be able to fix him, but you can help by sliding that wrench that just out of reach from him.

Talk. To. Him.
The longer you hold this in, the higher the chance it will turn into resentment. These feelings you feel towards him, they aren't due to him alone. You feed them as well. You allow them to fester and become vile. The longer you hold it in, the more damage you cause each other. Tell him how he makes you feel. The good and the bad. That is the mark of a true relationship. You poke at each other's weaknesses without hate. You do it not to hurt, but to strengthen. POKE POKE POKE. If you care about each other you can point out each other's flaws and accept them, once you both accept them, you can tear them down and improve on them.

Otherwise, walk away, and stop hurting yourself for nothing in return.

Work at it, or walk away. Neither is easy and both will require something from you.

I feel like fucking shit today, one of those days where I've gotta strain to smile, except when she smiles at me. I'm thinking at this point that she doesn't actually have any interest and she's just being friendly cause she's just a friendly person.

thing is, on days like this, I can't tell if that's logic speaking or if it's self deprecation speaking as I run through my failures in my head to figure out even the smallest thing to change to not fail. there is so much failure.

all I want is to watch a movie and have a girl cuddle up to me. instead I'm gonna go for a stupid ass drive and sing some stupid ass music, and maybe if I am very lucky and get up the motivation to do it, go to the stupid ass gym

it's a stupid ass day.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-7IHOXkiV8

>>18511829
Not the anon you're talking with but I have a question, what if the person doesn't want to talk? It could go one sided like jist me talking without receiving any feed back? Saying the feeling of numbness is the only thing inside?

>>18511889
How do you know they don't want to talk? Some people say they don't want to but want you to initiate first.

>>18511829
I could never bring up the being attracted to other people part in a million years. He would not be able to handle it.
But thanks anon. I appreciate you taking time out of your day to talk to me like this. I'll take it under extreme consideration.

>>18511896
I have initiated first a lot of times. She just stays silent listening to what I have to say. Her answers are always "I'm sorry" "thank you" or "I don't know how to feel because I'm numb". She won't open up anymore.

I can tell that everyone can see the frustration, anger, pain, and general nonplussed attitude in my eyes. sorry everyone I can't do anything about it. I've tried. it's how my face is now. for the shortest time someone else changed it but now it's just back to fucking normal. how fucking disappointing. now I'm back here knowing what it's like to take just a few steps toward there. at least being largely numb means I can't feel what I'm sure is an seriously unpleasant feeling as a result.

everything is just tiresome and boring.

God damn it I shouldn't have started that POTD run.
>>18511900
You can keep that to yourself, but you should bring up everything else. Tell him what of you love that wavers. You don't have to say that you been failing for other guys.
But
That may be the kick he needs. The reality that he can lose you. Not might, but will.
But you can hold that back, everything else, tell him. Talk to him not as if talking to a child, but as an adult that may lose you for his inaction..

>>18511385
I live in Hawaii. So yeah. It's like a 10 minutes drive

>>18511645
>>18511662
Same dudes. I hope we can get through this. My ex is already talking to some other dude.

>>18511889
That's a hard one.
First thing is first watch your tone. This is very hard to catch. Especially when we are emotionally bound to someone. We tend to lose a bit of logic when we try to talk to those we care about and love. We may not see that our words can be interpreted as accusations.

The one-sidedness can come because prior experiences she has had either from you or elsewhere. By which I mean she shuts down because she might fear upsetting you.

If you need to try to write down notes, maybe almost a script and read it to yourself. Over and over, you may catch that what sounds gentle to you is harsh to her.

This is why I say try a third-person view of things. Pull yourself out of your own emotions. Separate them from yourself. We become too clouded by them when we get stressed or fearful of loss. We may not see beyond the person our partner is showing us, even though there are hints. Never forget that girl you love, she has her own mind and problems. Things that look light to you, could be extremely wearing on her. Compassion and empathy, work on that first and then you may be able to communicate in a way she can respond to.

We (men) tend to be more direct and matter-of-fact. Which at times can be a bit too tactless, we try to handle problems head on and that could be a bit brash for others.

>>18511920
This was my ex to the T.
She should shut down and I would lose my cool. Then I would cause stress on both of us. What you need to do is figure out why she does that.
But it could be that she doesn't want to upset you. You need to hold back any negative feeling you may get when she recoils in, you simply ask why she feels that way. It will be frustrating, but she could be dealing with something stressful to her. A lot of times our partners hold back things in order to protect us, but in reality it's hurting us.

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Some advice would be appreciated, I feel like this "issue" is too dumb to make a new thread

I've been dating this guy for about 6 months now, and we really like each other. It's LDR, but he's coming to visit soon.

A little over a month ago I told him that I love him, but he said that he wasn't ready to say that yet. I told him that was fine, I wasn't mad or anything, and we just went on like normal, he didn't make it awkward or anything. The issue is that he isn't the type to take initiative, especially with stuff that makes him nervous like this, so I know I'm the one who will have to say something about it. I want to say it again now, but I'm not sure if I waited long enough. Any ideas?

Another day of obsessively checking my phone to see if you sent me a message. Can we ever go back to how things were? This situation is intolerable and it keeps getting worse. I hope a miracle happens and we can go back to how things were in may. I am not sure how much longer I can endure, but don't worry I am fighting it. I hope this is resolved soon, but I worry this may take years to fix.

>>18512146
You told him you love him even before seeing him irl? You're dumb. Stop overwhelming him with feelings

>>18512146
Slow down.
Those words are important. Or they should be.
Would you rather hear them because it would make you better? Like an automatic response to you saying them? Or would you rather they mean something?

Slow down, and just focus on being good to him. With time you'll hear what you want and it will likely mean more to you then.

Don't let your insecurities overwhelm you. Just enjoy what you have for now and focus on that. Enjoy his company and have a good time.
"I love you" they are just words without the backing to them. I can say them to a hooker or a sandwich. They would mean nothing.

Show love to each other through actions and shared memories. Eventually you will get what you want if show you are more than just sweet words.

>>18512191
Yeah, I suppose. I am a bit quick to jump to this stuff, it's not surprising that I'm ready for it so quickly. If I really do feel that way, I can wait around till he says it.

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where the FUCK do I find tall amazonian women?

>>18510385
I just broke up with my girlfriend today and the amount it obviously hurt for her is really weighing heavy on me. She seemed understanding of why I was doing it (I legitimately don't think I enjoy being in relationships and had been feeling really depressed and lonely lately) but it still obviously destroyed her emotionally, which is making me feel fucking atrocious. I don't love her like I used to but I still definitely care for her and want to eventually, when she's ready, be part of her life again as a friend. It really sucks to know that I'm causing her this much pain.

>>18512205
Don't worry about the words.
Look for substance.
It will be more beneficial to you in the long run.

Like a finely made dessert.
It takes time, skill, practice and bunch of ingredients to make something delicious.
While making it you want it then and there. Sure you lick the spoon during the process but you have to wait to fully enjoy it.

Now, the words "I love you" they are a bag of sugar. For your dessert it's a big ingredient, but not the main one. You can get impatient and say "fuck it" tear open that bag of sugar and just eat it. You get that sweetness you carve, you get then and there. But it won't be as delicious as the completed dessert. Not only that, pure sugar can get you sick. And now you're worse off.

Trust me, hearing the words is nice, it's a nice shot of those chemicals you want, but won't mean shit if you don't have that substance that love is built from.

Time, effort, compassion, communication, understanding, patience, and consequences (pos or neg). Hearing "I love you" from the person that has shown you the meaning of those words, it gives them so much more value than the words themselves.

I spent 8 hours the other day with this qt I'm pining for, and I still cant shake the feeling she hates me/dislikes me/whatever. We planned for just lunch, but she was cool with going ~30 miles away from home with me to the ocean to hang out. We sat and talked on the beach for around 3 hours and basically watched the sun set. She could have had any opportunity to tell me to take her back, and only did so hours into the day. Even though all of this is probably good signals on her end, I still cant shake the feeling that she hates me, because I feel that everyone hates me. Like this is easily the most progress I've ever had in something like this, the entire day wasnt awkward and we clicked pretty well but fuck I am the epitome of no self-esteem and I really dont want to fuck this up because she is as close to the ideal that I have ever met. I just think my low self-esteem is going to cause me to self-sabotage this, because I am extremely terrified of the prospect of success since I've never felt it before.

We work together, but we're both quitting in September and she'll be attending the same college as me when that time comes. At work I started being a bit more playful with her, like sticking a tag from a price gun on her and she said she'd keep it there when before every time I did that she'd just rip it off and go about her day. I sent her a text and she didnt respond, but I dont know I'm just overthinking all this fucking shit. Goddamn it one day I wont be so fucking pathetic and thats the day I'll get her

>>18512219
I'm 6'5" in heels, does this count? ;)

>>18512260
I'd consider any height over 6'2" or 188cm to be tall for women
I'm 6'7" (202cm) myself

>>18512248
Thanks Anon, that's helpful. I feel bad now that I went for that so quickly, I thought 5 months was enough time but maybe those were just cheap words. I'll save it until a good time, when I'm done making the dessert.

>>18512219
>tfw you're 5'5'' and want a tall woman
No hope man. I want to protect someone taller than me. As strange as it sounds I want to be the smaller spoon that spoons the bigger one.

Here's a summary of my sexual life beginning with when I lost my virginity at age 18. Posts are numbered in correspondence to the different partners I've had, proceeded by my age at the time of the event.

1. Age 18 - Lose virginity to someone I now despise and will very likely never talk to again due to my own foolishness. We were in a relationship for 4 years. I never loved her. I was lying to myself and saying/doing whatever felt right at the time because I didn't know any better.

2. Age 23 - Entered a faux-relationship with somebody I thought I was attracted to; part of me just wanted to fuck somebody of half-asian decent. Ticking a check off of a box, if you will. One night, we get really drunk, we fuck and I cum all over her body. What proceeds is a badly-built relationship followed by unsatisfying sex that lasts a little over a month until I simply stop talking to her.

3. Age 23. - Entered an "open" relationship with a girl who was a part of my friend group. One night, us and our friends all go to a concert at a club. There, we then proceed to feel each other up, and make out all night. Days after, we reconnect and go on a date. Within two weeks she comes over, I make us dinner and we give each other oral. What follows is a relationship fueled by sex, drugs, and a lot of lies between two people with very different personalities. Currently, we do not talk.

4. Age 23 - Participated in an orgy (which included the girl mentioned above) and fucked this girl. She is of Italian descent. Recent profile updates show that she is in a 3-way relationship with two other girls. She now portrays herself as butch/tomboy. Fun fact: I was the only guy who managed to have an orgasm at that orgy.

(to be continued)

>>18512275
Don't feel bad. Simply learn from it and it wouldn't be a waste. Skill and practice until you can sit down and enjoy it. Slow down, and enjoy the moments you share together. They will be more special that way.

Good luck anon.

>>18512267
Ah I'm 173cm without shoes

>>18512277
That's cute

>>18512281

5. Age 24. Matched with a customer on Tinder. I was slightly surprised to have remembered who she was having not significantly paid attention to our interactions while I was at work. She looked a lot more attractive in the pictures she had on her Tinder profile. Our date was quite uneventful. She was a dull conversation partner. For the first time in my life I was the one facilitating conversations and thinking of topics to talk about while she passively agrees with everything I had to say. Regardless, I drank enough to not care about how dull she was and how less attractive she was in person. She gave me a blowjob. We have not talked since.

6. Age 24. Matched with another girl on Tinder (we were both visiting Toronto). I invite her out to the club, we kiss and end up spending a significant amount of time together along with her traveling partner. Our personalities were complementary and we got along quite well. One night we end up at her partner's Tinder match's place. We lay down on the couch together and I proceed to feel her up, finger her and play with her g-spot, for about half an hour. She asks if she'd like me to reciprocate, to which I agree. She puts on a condom on me, and I then have trouble maintaining an erection due to an overwhelming feeling of anxiety. She proceeds to briefly blow me and I end up fucking her for all about 30 seconds. We have remained friends and still keep in contact through social media.

I can't interact with others and form any kind of meaningful relationships because of your shit fuck you

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I'm 21, in college, and have been a shut in all my life
people say I should be interested in women, but I'm just not
the only times I've actually ever touched someone from the opposite sex was when I got a hug from a few girls in 8th grade, which is made worse by knowing that lots of people have sex in high school, while I literally never held someone's hand
I get kind of depressed when I think about it, but that feeling goes away quickly, just because it's not that of a factor in my life, but it's something I give a lot of thought to
I've been pretty content with my life so far, and I probably will continue to do so, even through the unofficial wizard age at 28
I would love to have a girlfriend, someone to talk to about the most intimate and secretive things I don't even tell my friends about, someone to really open my heart to, and at that point I remember all the horror stories people have about dating, and that just turns me off any thoughts about dating completely. In my current state I could see myself dating someone and them leaving me, all without hardly any disruption in my life. I can see myself setting up some online dating profile and never interacting with it. I've considered it but it's made dating like online shopping for women, and it's a service I really don't want to pay for

>>18512341
>I would love to have a girlfriend, someone to talk to about the most intimate and secretive things I don't even tell my friends about
Yeah, a girls aren't into that, buddy.

You should say something before it's too late.

>>18512354
well then I'm not into a lot of girls then, friend

>>18512354
What he meant was he needs a faggot like you to talk those things over with, that better?

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HELP!

>Be good friends with couple
>Total third wheel and I love it
>They date for 2 years then have a bad breakup
>Still friends with both of them
>Find out the girl is seeing someone new already
>Not even a month later
>It turns out to be her ex's (My friend) good friend
>Guy friend is already unstable from the breakup
>Don't want to add fuel to the fire
>But I feel he should know

Do I stay out of it, or do I tell him that she's already fucking other people and that other person is one of his friends?

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Matched with a girl on Tinder. Chatted for a few days then asked her out for coffee, and she enthusiastically agreed. Today was when we were supposed to meet and she never showed up. Never messaged. It is now midnight and she sent me like a page-long message basically saying

>I'm so sorry. I completely forgot. I'm kind of overwhelmed with life right now and don't think I have time for these things. I'll be deleting tinder, I've already hidden my profile. I hope you find what you are looking for and wish you the best.

Somebody please fucking save me from this hell. This dating shit is going to age me by like 10 years.

>>18512360
Maybe you should tell them that.

>>18512458
sounds like you got trolled
she probably found a better looking guy

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..Any of you ever been so beta that when nice people go out of their way to try to involve you in their conversations, you still can't say a damn thing because you're actually just that much of an uninteresting cuck and you don't want anyone to find out?

This my life. This is what I have right now, and I hate the guilt that comes from having people be nice to me, but I can't do anything back for them.

At the same time, I'm scared to lose the few genuine people I've somehow managed to be around.

>see cute girl
>she's 26 (+5 from me)
>she's got kids
>she's not married
>see cute girl
>she's 17
>she's in that college classes in high school thing
college is some weird shit man

>>18510385
Dear me,

Please get over her. She treated you like shit. Stop defending her. Stop saying that it was your fault. It was both your fault. She treated you like shit, ignored you and when you were feeling like shit and needed someone to talk to she said she didn't have time for it. Fuck her. You don't need her. Stop thinking you can level with her. She's toxic and only wants to start shit. Stop reaching out. Please. You can find better girls. Someone that'll actually treat you like a human being. Someone who won't flirt with other guys behind your back. Someone who'll care.

We made it this far through all the bullshit. We can take even more.

Love
Me.

>>18511220
Everything was always in another lifetime for us.
I don't hate you either, and I never wanted you to think that I did. There's a sadness within me knowing that our friendship has now officially faded but at the same time...it needed to. Even with everything that happened, I'm glad you were a part of my life.
I'll try my best to make you proud.

See you in the next life.

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>>18512484
I feel you buddy. It's hard to accept those things when viewed through the emotional past lens.

Why do you still feel positively about her. You can get a better gf.

>>18512504
I would reach out to them in a month to see if they are healed enough to be friends. It sounds like you still really care about them.

I wish i never met you. i'm sitting her worried about you because your in the hospital and i cant get a hold of you. Were not even dating you have a boyfriend and i cant stop worrying. I need to find something else to do because this is super unhealthy and i want it to stop.

>>18512525
I did. After a year of not talking I reached out to them last October to apologize for everything. And we both did apologize. There's no healing left to do between us...we're acquaintances now but there's also really no room for us to be friends anymore. We had a good run together and I'll forever root for them from the sidelines. I think they know that.

>>18510760
>>18510747

Need advice as well. In the same situation except I came into the relationship knowing he was into traps. Hes had a few hooks up before we started dating. I have nothing against it and I'm actually willing to fulfill his needs and wants. Aka fuck his ass with a strap-on.

Anyways, we talked about getting married, having kids, currently looking for a place of our own. He's dead set on having this future and busts his ass off to do anything for me. But today we was acting weird when we had to go on his gmail to change some settings and that's when I knew something was up. (Dated liars and cheaters in the past) he tried avoiding me seeing anything but wasn't aggressive about it. So I openly said "I know you're obviously hiding something, let me see it." And that's when he said "I've been messaging traps on Craigslist for nudes." Lets me see it, was true, was only for pictures and said he wasn't looking for hook ups in the messages. Which is a relief but he explained why he did it and it's because he's still really into that kind of stuff. Friends, family and ex's in his past gave him so much shit for it that's he's embarrassed with himself. As for me I accept that part of him. Point is though, the fact that he gave in into temptation and was disloyal to me, really hurt me. I trust him more than anyone else in this world. He was always there for me, drove 4 hours to pick up my crying ass from a shitty ex who cheated on me at the time. He knows all the bullshit I been through and the shitty guys Ive dated and treated me like shit. Going into this relationship, he promised to never be like them... I don't believe for a second he is but I am scared he'll give in into temptation again. He promised he would never do this again, and it scared the hell out of him picturing a life without me. But what if... yanno? I want to believe in him. I don't want something like this to ruin us but I'm also tired of guys doing shady shit like this. (1/2)

>>18512509
Because I look at all the old videos. The pictures. I remember how happy we were. All the words she wrote. And I just can't fully believe that the person who wrote those things is gone. That the last words she told me was to get over it and to delete her number and never speak to her again.

I just want to believe that she still misses me. That she thinks about me or cares.

I want her to be happy. For her to find someone that can make her happier than I could ever make her.

And deep down I want to believe that she's wish the same for me.

She was my first which is probably why it hurts so much. I'm young, only 19, I have my whole life ahead of me. I hope I'll be able find someone.

>>18512543
(2/2)

I'm tired of easily giving in as to giving them a chan've only to get hurt again. I don't want to go through that again. But I love him so much. He's my best fucking friend and 100% understands me better than anyone else has in this world. He is litterlaty the death of me. I'm scared he's gonna want cock in his ass more than me. Best way to put it lol, but it's true. We talked and agreed on getting a strap on for when he's feeling to get fucked in his ass (side note: he told me he doesn't want to be with a guy or trap, he just likes getting fucked as times, not all the time.) Not sure if that matters or not @_@ Idk. Am I over thinking this? Does this shit happen to other couples when it comes to their partner being bi and wanting the opposite gender instead of them? (If that makes sense. I suck at talking and wording things. Sorry.) I'm willing to give this a chance I'm just wondering if others have advice or has run into a situation like this with their partner and how to work it out. Idk.

>>18512554
She did not mean those words at the end. Do not forget how she acted then. That was the real her.

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here's a silver lining. even with how shit I feel, I don't want a cigarette or a bunch of whiskey... that said, I did eat like 400 calories of junk food. I'm now that boring, eating junk food is some super crazy shit. oh man, watch out I'm getting wild tonight! I ate some bugles and strawberry wafer cookies! WOOOOOOOOOOOOO GETTIN TURNT UP TONIGHT.

>>18512592
I don't know anon. I feel like she did mean those words. She said I wasn't a good person.
Maybe she just realized over time that she doesn't love me, she hates me.

>>18510645
Yeh, I just worry that she's forgotten how awesome our time was together before she left.

>>18512601
>Strawberry wafer cookies
AWW SHIT SON, THAT'S MAH JAM!

Okay, I honest to god like Fallout 4, I know it's not the best in the series; but, functionally as a "Post apocalyptic RPG" it does it's job better than the non-story in Fallout 3. Most of the people who I know who are familiar with the games look at 3 with rose tinted glasses and scoff at 4 because "Another settlement needs your help." All in all, I like this game to bits and I'm sick of having to justify my taste in the game to others who are equally biased.

hey, then how about you get here? how about you just be. here. then. if you don't like things I'm even just thinking about possibly maybe doing, even though it's never gonna happen... THEN HOW ABOUT YOU JUST BE HERE SO IT'S NOT EVEN ON MY MIND?

oh that's right, we gotta just come up with new tests every time I clear shit with flying colors. you know that shit is a system that guarantees failure right?

>>18512668
there's some real shit. you're really grinding me down.

>>18512668
Sounds like you are demanding someone do something that takes time instantly. What is wrong anon?

One day I think you couldn't think I'm worth a damn. One day I think you have lost all passion for me. One day I think we're actually going to work out.

What the fuck happen to last summer?

Stop fucking with my head.

>>18510392
>2 months
*track of baby crying*

>>18510417
you have a shit dad, drinking while driving is seriously dangerous and i think you should talk to him about it instead of pretending

>>18510488
they're disillusioned about the world, under all that hate for what they went through many of them are still good people

>>18510624
i actually have been working on something like that but i have no artistic ability whatsoever, do you have discord or something? MG#9334 if you do. i'd be down AF for that

>>18512687
I just hit a wall I could have used a hand with and there's never the smallest comfort it'd take to give me the energy to keep moving when this happens. then someone took a jab at the wrong spot at the wrong time.

I'll be fine by tomorrow.

>>18512572
sounds like he was just looking for some quality fap material, i'd say give him a chance because he sounds like he wouldn't consider cheating (i.e. hiding his looking for fap material in the same manner a cheater would hide their hookup messages.) but i'm just some random memelord on the internet.

You're toxic and I hate that if you messaged me right now, I would go straight back to trying to comfort you while you made me feel like shit. I hope I pushed you far enough away that you won't try to talk to me again. It's not good for either of us. I hope you're doing well in life though.

>>18510488
>they are fucking AWFUL.
oh? how so? by what measure? and what online communities are you referring to? also do you work for buzzfeed?

>>18512757
Hahahah.

>>18512818
>do you work for buzzfeed
kek

>>18512833
actually in light of recent events its more likely to be someone from cnn

So i was fucked over by my employer!

Advice me if you have any.

So I've been working for this company for about 2 years. When I signed on I had to go through an apprentice period of 6 months with a handler/"babysitter" kind of thing due to the nature of the tasks: fucking it up can result in death.
>I design safety systems on rollercoasters
so I did my apprenticeship period and was cleared to work without a babysitter, allthough instead of giving me the fulltime contract they signed me on for the same deal again for another 6 months with the exception of the contract name "Temporary hourly employment", or something like that.

>"unfortunately we don't have another contract in the budget right now"
was the excuse..and well due to the "once in a lifetime-kind of job" and that I really enjoyed doing it: I decided to go "eeeh what the hell, let's be patient and sign on for another 6 months, that turned into another 6 months and then another 6 months....
I am now on my 5th round of 6 month extension with a contract that pays shit! I l have litteraly depleted my savings to be able to keep working there since I don't even make enough money for my life to go around.

So to the fucked me over part:
Over the past few months we actually had 2 guys quit, so logicly: There should be 2 contracts availiable in the budget right?

Well there was but, my boss hired 2 other fuckin' dudes from outside the company!

>>18512940

Part 2:
i ofcourse confronted my boss about it, at first a nice coversation: just asking why? where am I at towards getting that position?

>"Well unfortunately I don't have any open spots right now. when we lost Anon (one of the guys who quit) we lost 30 years of experience of working with this kind of technology, the thought have crossed my mind: "can I replace Anon with you" but I came to the conclusion that I needed to push our experience bar higher after that drop, that's were these 2 new guys come in.

Well, it's hard to argue against his motives I guess but it doesn't leave me satisfied, it still leaves me with a contract that pays me half of what my co-workers make despite me being atleast as productive, likely more in my opinion.

Well, I started looking for a new job recently as a result of this circus.
my motivation at work is dead and I'm sure it shows, I can no longer motivate myself to do great work.

I talked to my boss again the other day about it, a bit more of an aggresive approach:
>"I think you have handled my case really poorly, were I'm from (im from elsewhere) when spots open in your company for hires, you always go for the hourly workers first, it's just basic fairness towards your hourly employees, I worked here for 2 years now and I've made no money at all, on the contrary, I am loosing money to work here, I've depleted my savings in order to make my finances go around during these years, I call that fuckin' loyal towards a company: the thank you Anon: "I'm sorry we don't have any spots open right now" - " well you fuckin' did and you gave them away! one of those spots should have been mine, i'm sorry but that's just the the way it is, I'm trying to still end my employment here on a good note but I can tell you it's not that easy to motivate myself anymore"

>That got me called up by HR to have a disciplinary meeting.
Ridiculous!

I'm so tired of the company now... I just want to find a new job and move on.
I feel betrayed!

>>18512942
Part 3:
Just to mention those savings had a purpose.

We were planning on going on a big vacation me, my gf and a few close friends "around the globe".
That is on right now actually: I Skipper it due to not enough money and being unable to take that much time off!
So my gf and my closest friends are gone now for 13 weeks (10 weeks remaining) having a great time but I'm still stuck here working.

>I'm gonna take a small 1 week vacation though and meet them up in Spain in 3 weeks so thats decent I guess... but it'l cost me since I don't have vacation pay=1 week unpaid time off!

>>18512757
What did they do that made them toxic? Someone asking for help or going through really terrible things mentally is exhausting to deal with but that doesn't make them toxic. You should have nudged them to professional help. It is likely they are now just anxious and waiting to hear from you, but not reaching out as often because they don't want to piss you off.

>>18512601
Lol

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>>18512911
well according to CNN macho man died, a top story on their website. i need help not crying

>>18512543
>>18512572
He hid it from you once, what's stopping him from doing it again? He could be downloading apps and deleting them before he comes around you. Changing names in his phone so you don't question who he is texting. He was lazy in covering his tracks and you believe because he was found that when he "came around and confessed" his misdeeds that he won't do it again? Things don't work this way, deary. He lusts for feminine boys which is a role you cannot fill even with a strap on. He will stray from you. Brace yourself.

>>18512824
Nobody here is talking about you nor cares who you are chin nuts

Alright, can someone tell me if I'm being an unreasonable cunt?

There's this chick. She's living in a different country (though not that far away), but we've known each other for years, playing games and shit. She kind of has mental health issues, shitty dad etc but she's realIy great and I find her great to talk to.

After a while of not talking (a year or two) we start again. Eventually gets pretty obvious that she likes me and things (pretty quickly) get close between us. Not that we're long distance dating or whatever the fuck but she says that she loves me a few times and that I should travel to go see her (I'm poor student and cant afford to though).
Couple of weeks go by and she slowly loses interest. Says she's going through some stuff. Whatever, I don't blame her, nor especially mind that much, I'm not some lonely dude that never gets girls' attention but it doesn't feel that great for obvious reasons.

Fast forward a couple of weeks of being friends, still talking, playing games n shit. Talks to me about some of her problems sometimes. Last night she says she started sleeping with some guy that we play games with that she knows irl. She knew he only wanted to bang and that he didnt want anything else but she was upset saying that she felt bad that he just kind of left afterwards.

Now really I don't give a shit, she can fuck who she likes but I kind of took it really personally that she just kind of assumed I didn't care about it given out past. I'm usually there for her when she gets upset about stuff but now I just feel kind of bitter towards her. I dunno. Felt kind of like she used me for attention for a bit then got bored. But still keeps me around so she can have a whine about how /lonely/ she is.

Overall I just dont know if I'm overreacting and still have muh feelings.
Or if I should just start ignoring because she makes me feels like shit.

Also trying not to be too specific bc she sometimes comes on this board.
Thanks.

>>18513054
Consider the possibility that due to the heavy feelings in the past she didn't want to talk about it or bring it up further because of underlying chance she could upset you. She doesn't want to feel or portray herself as "a used up whore" from indulging in a one night stand. It's a common case of the female opening up and instantly regretting it and now she's hiding to run away from the pain before it starts up again.

>>18513049
lmao

>>18513070
This is good. But even considering what you said, am I right in feeling like she's being a cunt given the circumstances?
Am I being a shitty person by feeling bitter even if she meant well?
This is only assuming what you're saying is actually the case, which I get the feeling isn't.

Is it worth confronting and just straight up asking? Not sure if I want to know honestly.

When I'm not on a diet I naturally eat very little. When I want to lose weight I'm suddenly incredibly hungry and have no self control. Sigh. Thank goodness it's only 1 kilo.

>>18513094

>am I right in feeling like she's being a cunt given the circumstances?
I don't know her underlying tone so it's hard for me to answer this.

>Am I being a shitty person by feeling bitter even if she meant well?
Eh, I wouldn't say it makes you "shitty" but I would say you sound close-minded which is probably a defense mechanism..

>Is it worth confronting and just straight up asking? Not sure if I want to know honestly.
If you aren't willing to talk about it in depth then don't bring it up. "Go hard or go home" could fit here in terms of bringing it up. If you go in half heartily you won't care about what she has to say and that's disrespectful if she's opening up to you

>>18513153
Thanks friendo

>>18512940
>>18512942
>>18513001
aNYTHING?

>>18513228
Fuck off?

>>18513250
I am.
I've started looking for another job... it just pisses me off that they do it this way.
Im basicly being forced to quit a great job cause they don't want to treat me fairly!

>>18511120
Ninja?????

I was certain God existed these last few days but now I'm starting to fall again and losing hope again, and it's for no real reason.
Please God don't let go of my hand

I reported an acquaintance to social services and now I feel guilty. I don't want drama (of which there is a lot in his family) and I don't know if I overreacted. How bad have I fucked up his life?

>>18513313
Also terrified that someone might figure out it was me that reported him even though there's no way they could find out.

Grandmother thinks I'm gay... rest of family probably does too. Should this bother me? I haven't been with any women in my entire life but being gay has nothing to do with that.

>>18513228
Tell your boss you feel undervalued and that you will have to start looking for a new job to support yourself.
If you are valuable to him he will try to keep you. If not, you'll find another job.

I'm fucked up in the head
>bf talks to chicks online and I think the worst while nothing's happened I flip shit on him
>find an old text that proves he cheated on me and I act like nothing is wrong
wtf is my problem?

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>>18513374
>Grandmother thinks I'm gay
Let me translate that for you:
Your grandma thinks you're very handsome and wonders why the hell you haven't found a girl yet.

>Should this bother me?
No, it's actually kind of a compliment.

I can't stop thinking about what I'd like to say to my ex if she contacted me again.
How the fuck do I stop this and accept that she'll never ever contact me again?

>>18513525
aw shucks. thanks for the spin, anon, but she's supposed to think I'm handsome anyway.

>>18513013
I am totally fine helping people with their problems. What I'm not ok with is someone blaming me for things that could not possibly be my fault. And just being rude to me in general because I don't fit in their life exactly how they want me to.

>>18513472
Dump him anon. He aint need ur attn. He is still gonna do it.
Get a backspine and confront him bout it. He is doing it and staying with ya cuz he know u aint gon do shit bout it. Prove him wrong.

Good luck and wish you the best, remember He thinks and knows ur spineless to do anything bout it. Ya should feel pissed girl there bunch of other respectful guys in this world. End it with him.


Again interested in hearing the outcome of this, if ya want me to put in my email I can so you can give updates.

Good luck girl, he aint shit and is too immature for ya. He is a lyin unfaithful motherfucker.

>>18512407
He'll find out and come to terms with it in his own time.

>>18513561
Thank you anon, I'm really lost here thinking what should I do because I still love him so much.

I always confronted him about other girls and it was proven to be my insecurity/paranoia. After a fight, he always makes me feel calm and I apologize for being pissed.

I've found out the text yesterday, we talked last night like nothing happened. I guess I'm like those dogs who barks at cars and when they stop the dog doesn't know what to do.

I took a screenshot, I was thinking about sending him and ask straight away, that's the reaction he expects from me, a full blowout for nothing and now that I have a reason to blow I'm stuck. But you're right, I think it didn't sink on me yet he's been cheating for months...

>>18512543
>>18512572
Okay. 1st anon here.
In short this>>18512751
In length here:
You sound like you really do love him, and you have to be careful how you go about it. Like anon said, it could just be fap material. That was all I was looking for in my relationship. The taboo and such. Would I bang a man? Suck his cock? Or vice versa? Nope. I just fapped to the pictures, and videos. My gf had a thing for girls as well, it was confusing when I found out she had interest in other women, but when I dug deeper I figured it out, she was into tits. She enjoyed the way they moved and bounced. So I made a point to play with hers more and more. She enjoyed it.

Now for you, you poked and prodded at him and he just told you? Maybe he trusts you far more than you think. He trust in your relationship more than you think. You should too, if you try to control what he faps to, there may be chance the taboo will seem more exciting.

Look, but don't touch. That's pretty much what it comes down to. He has his own mind and trying to control it may not be favorable. There isn't much you can do when it comes to this but trust in your partner and your relationship. I can see why you fear losing it. It sounds like a great one. You guys have a solid foundation, trusting to the point where you can show each other those things that previous partners bit back at.

Trust in him as only you can and believe in him. Be mindful that yes, our partners are capable of these things, of being weak, but if we focus on those things we give them power. Much like a person accusing their lover of cheating will often lead them to cheating. Its just the way we work. Do not punish the man for what he looks at. You just make sure that he understands you are worried about losing him. Make him know and feel you want him as he is. Not need, but want. At the same time he has to know that you have limits, and that you will be there for him as long as he respects your boundaries as you would respect his.

>>18512757
In what ways are they toxic?

Can anyone explain to me why I have to be moist? I hate humidity and refuse to leave my house when it rains.

>>18513557
Sounds like something happened between you two. Give it time they'll come around.

>>18513472
>>18513580
>After a fight, he always makes me feel calm and I apologize for being pissed.
This is manipulation. He knew in this moment he was lying to and he *chose* to lie -- and continue to lie -- so he could continue cheating. Making it out to be your fault for feeling insecure, deluded, crazy, and paranoid so your self esteem sinks low and you invest more into him for his approval thinking he will stop chatting with other females since you work so hard for him.

>I've found out the text yesterday, we talked last night like nothing happened. I guess I'm like those dogs who barks at cars and when they stop the dog doesn't know what to do.
Taking a step back and waiting to collect your thoughts is much better than a rash confrontation. Now reality is sinking in. You choose what you deserve -- now, do you *deserve* to date a cheater? Please know that chances are high that he will do it again and be sneaky about it. Change contact names, install dating apps and delete them when he is around you, hide his phone and laptop plus changing codes constantly, his demeanor and attitude towards you will also drastically change for no apparent reason.

>took a screenshot, I was thinking about sending him and ask straight away, that's the reaction he expects from me, a full blowout for nothing and now that I have a reason to blow I'm stuck.
That's his manipulation at play. You aren't guilty for what he has decided to do to you. It proves without a doubt he doesn't respect nor care about you, you need to remember this no matter what he says to you it will all be lies so he can have his cake and eat it, too. I cannot stress this enough: do not feel bad for being the non-guilty party in this scenario. It was his agenda to hide it and it was your duty as a girlfriend to trust him.

>I think it didn't sink on me yet he's been cheating for months...
Never speak to him again, nothing good will come of staying with him.

yesterday my husband told me that he sucked a trap´s cock when he was 16 and loved it. now i am afraid he will get bored out of his mind of our sex life sooner or later. yaay...

>>18513731
get a strap on or something. its fun.

>>18513731
There is some shit i will never bring up again. Ever. Why he have to tell you that? Idk. Something is up, prob he wants a 3sum with you and a trap. Maybe he is cheating or bout to with a trap. Were yall playing "confessions" or something? If so then I would not worry bout it, it is confessions and he trust ya.

>>18513769
Bruh, what state are you from?

>>18513763
we have a strap on.
>>18513769
he told me because we were talking about unrelated stuff and somehow ended by the topic of girls having lesbian experiences. i said i don´t really know why it´s so unusual for guys to have same sex experiences and rahter usual for girls. and asked him if he ever had a same sex experience. so i´ll only have myself to blame, kek.
i mean, our sex life is pretty great, but how can our "let´s have sex despite us both being tired" ever compeed with the excitement of something as "forbidden" as getting picked up by a convincing trap. that´s a whole different league of sexual experience. i mean, it´s not really an issue, i just wanted to get my weird new insecurity off my chest. so thanks for listening.

>>18513693
>and you invest more into him for his approval thinking he will stop chatting with other females since you work so hard for him.
oh fuck, that's what I've been doing to make it up for being so paranoid, I feel so low now, specially because I always felt something was wrong and he calmly just made me forget about it, that I was just too stressed and everything was "fine".

>Please know that chances are high that he will do it again and be sneaky about it.
Once a cheater always a cheater...

>It proves without a doubt he doesn't respect nor care about you
This hurts... bad

>Never speak to him again
I have his IM open to text him now and rant but at the same time I just want to disappear and block him everywhere. I made a fool of myself when something wasn't wrong, now that is he can use that "you're just too stressed" card on me.

>>18511324
If ya brk up with him you have every right to see other ppl. Staying emotionally attached to him even after ya brk up is unhealthy. You will become depressed even extra if your mindset is set to be with him til death do yall part even though yall aint married.

Get rid of this mindset anon, for the better. I know after a brkup it takes time to get back on ur feet and into the dating game, but dont ever ever believe that no one else is out there for you. There are over 7billion ppl on this planet

>>18513802
If you don't live together and he doesn't have your belongings, it would be a good move on your part to block him from everything and focus on yourself. You no longer need closure from this guy. Who cares for the why when you're aware of how well you can treat someone you love? He's unstable and messed up somewhere within himself where he feels compelled to have multiple relationships at once. Always know what he has to say from this point on is a lie and has been since the screenshot (probably even before that). It's tough and it hurts but you lived without him before and can do it again.

>>18513817
No, we don't live together and I don't care about any belonging, they are replaceable, my time and peace of mind aren't... There's a part of me that wants the truth to come out but I guess he'll use one lie after another to cover up

>It's tough and it hurts but you lived without him before and can do it again.
Yes it is and now I'm not sure what to do.. I mean I want to just break shit like before but then what's the point? He won't change and I'll get more hurt

I let fear convince me again not to approach women even though i know what a stranger thinks of me is not important.

>>18513843
Ah, one thing I regret from when the last guy did to me what your guy did to you is also not breaking his shit....well, setting it on fire. You're not wrong for feeling this way. Here if you need to talk girl

>>18510385
Someone print this one and burn it for me.

Dear Lilith,

Thank you for the wonderful gifts you have bestowed upon me. I like them a lot.

Max

>>18513843
>>18513851
Furthermore,
>There's a part of me that wants the truth to come out but I guess he'll use one lie after another to cover up
You're absolutely right. He will lie and cover up those lies with lies and sprinkle lies on top of that. Take some time to mourn but don't dwell over him, that's what he wants: you to break and come running back to him because you're familiar with him. Prove him wrong and ghost his ass.

>>18513851
I know some incriminating shit he brags never being caught would harm him more than breaking his things. That's a fucking red flag I've missed I want to slap myself, he'd say same shit about me to others.

>>18513856
>you to break and come running back to him because you're familiar with him
that happened so many times...
I'm always the one leaving angry and then later apologizing...

>Prove him wrong and ghost his ass.
This is going to be hard and I've failed before...

Anytime I feel good about myself someone wants to take it away. Anytime I do a job someone wants to take away the money/ I feel helpless. I feel anxiety. Every day for the past few days I live with a constant panic attack. My chest hurts.

My family doesn't help me. They don't seem to care if I live or die. My boyfriend doesn't help me, he wants me to be a 'strong independant woman'. I don't have a full time job right now and the last one I had made me sick from anxiety. I am sensitive and get bullied a lot, especially at work. I tried to start two businesses and my friends all shut them down. They always act like what I am doing isn't good enough. I work on films sometimes and they don't care. I do events for my business and they come to get drunk. I networked for years despite social anxiety and it led me nowhere except to shitty alcoholic and abusive boyfriends. I made some money from them but it never kept going. It just made me more anxious.

I went to a therapist and he said there was nothing wrong with me. He wouldn't prescribe me any medication. I want to cry.

I want to be a bitchy bossy person who doesn't give a fuck but I'm not, I'm just not. All the hard work goes nowhere.

I hate freelancing. It makes me lazy and clients never pay consistently. I make art and people tell me it sucks. Everything I do someone close to me tells me it sucks. If nobody cares about what I can do, and nobody pays me, and nobody wants to help how can I survive? Being kind only seems to work against me. I just keep falling and falling from grace and I don't know how to fix it because I can't seem to change who I am.

I just want support, even if it's emotional - but that's too much for people to give. My own mother guilts me for money as soon as I have a pocketful. I'll never save for retirement like this.

>>18510385
I feel like you worked very hard to make me fall in love with you so you could reject me, but of course not fully reject me because you want to keep me. I don't understand what you gain from this?

Sometimes I wonder did you hold back tears, warmth, emotions because you had fear of me? Or did you really not trust me with them? Like an autistic block, maybe you never learned how to communicate them with those around you, at least with the ones you cared about. I simply wonder if after 10 years, I came to expect more than you could give. Maybe I asked too much, maybe you never asked enough of me to make me feel like I meant something to you.

I wanted to be your confidant as you were mine. Was wrong in trusting you with so Much? Was I wrong in committing so much in you? In thinking that you were stronger than I believed you to be?

I just don't know anymore, and as days go by, with us in this state, I don't know what I knew from before. I wish you knew what you wanted, maybe you do but lack the courage to push me hard enough. So you breadcrumb me in order to keep me around. God, I hope not. I still believe you are better than that. I still want to believe it.

Give me sign, anything.

Embrace me or release me.
You have to make the move, or simply just watch me go.

>start dating girl from my community college, things are great
>start looking at schools, we ultimately decide on one of the larger state schools, it was the best she could get into.
>after scheduling this week, i am having an insane amount of anxiety about how this iscthe wrong choice and I should have went to a better school.
>I haven't been this mentally fucked up in years and its really bothering me

I am violently self destructing. I can't sleep because I fear having that dream again which keeps morphing into something more frightening each night. I can barely eat, and every ten minutes I check what you are doing. I have read multiple science volumes cover to cover, went on multiple drives, left town, saw my shrink early, and got better medication but nothing is working. I am an anxious mess and it keeps getting worse. I really need to hear from you, this cannot continue. But I don't want you to feel guilty.

>>18513983
Are you a female?

Just fucking cheat on me or something already. You're not enjoying our sex life, you're constantly whining that "the spark is missing", and constantly bitch that I don;t do enough, despite me spending all my free time and all my energy on you. fucking fuck I'm frustrated

Should I attempt to take a date to a jazz club even though I've never ever been to one and the only jazz I ever listened to was a bit of Miles Davis? I have reasons to imagine she'd like it but it's probably better to play it safe instead, right?

>>18514027
No. I'm not.

>>18513983
Initials?

I wish I could cry, I just can't. God I'm such a fucken loser, what the fuck am i doing, why do i keep on living, i don't matter, nobody likes or repsects me, haven't been truly happy in years. i have no friends or love life, no where to go but home and work, im a fucken nobody, fuck this life.

>>18514170
Try to join a charity group maybe. Hopefully you get to meet people and also feel like you are doing something more to help the world, than most average people do.

>>18512757
You made it toxic by being so narrow minded and allowing things to fester and get out of hand. I accept my part in how fucked up things got but you couldn't accept that there was more to it than my jealousy. I know if I messaged you right now we would start off all over again. I can't do that because you excluded me from the important details that would have averted the bullshit. Message me, I've a few things I need to come clean about, and it's time you did the same.

Every fucking time I go outside, there's this awful sensation in my ass that makes me feel like I need to wipe it. Despite having done so a ton, and a lot more fully than most people, the sensation is still there. It's not exactly itching, but more like a "rubbing" sensation, as if there's something there that shouldn't be even though I see no reason that should be the case. I've never done anything with my ass other than shit out of it, and I haven't changed my diet drastically, but here's this problem, and it's been this way since at least last winter. My diet's even better than it once was.

I've asked for help multiple times on the internet and no one ever knows why this is, so I'm going to assume it's some infection that I'll never know about until I can see a doctor.

>>18514276
lmao I have the same problem, what the fuck is the cause?

>>18511228
when it comes to condoms, I'm fairly certain that one size fits all. if you want to test it yourself you can put one on a wine bottle or something and see just how far it stretches.
I'm not sure about other sources of contraception, but it depends on whether you two want long-term prevention or just for your first (few) time(s).

>>18514276
If it only happens outside, could it be a tiny amount of sweat?

>>18514243
Why don't you message me, then? You know exactly how to find me.

>>18514332
You first

>>18514287
I don't know, man. I guessed that it could be ass hair, but I trimmed off most of that and nothing changed.
>>18514330
Sweat adds to the problem, but it's still definitely there indoors.

>>18514332
>>18514243
Initials of both of you, Just in case you both have the wrong person and I am the one you want.

>>18514348
>>18514332
It's like an adorable argument fest in here, lmao.
If one of you's a C, we'll fite much later. Right now, I'm 17 minute away from working today.

>>18513877
Long shot, but do you live in the US?

>>18514359
Well both of you seem to care about each other but are too dumb to reconcile your issues. For reference I was looking for a H if any of you are a H who is looking for someone else.

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developing anxiety in my early twenties is fucking hell. i wish i had it when i was in high school so it could have been somehow acceptable and not potentially life and career ruining. also i am now realizing that having been raised as a mini-adult and receiving the child genius treatment by teachers has fucked up not only my social skills, but also shattered my perception of myself and led me to realize that i am not as an intelligent as everyone told me i was, or as i could have grown into had i not been a lazy fucker all along. now i am forever condemned to watch the people i made fun of in high school for being brainlets become successful adults while i try to make sense of my depression how it fucked up my academic career

and how*

I feel too much pressure from my family

If you knew how badly I've fallen in love after meeting you fir the first time. I feel like 4 more seconds of staring into your eyes and we would be on a good way to heaven. I wonder if Gosia have told you that you are my crush. She probably did, so why are you still sending me snaps if you know that I would want you to be more than a friend? Now you are 600kms away and I hope that once I come there in the end of July with Gosia, it will be fucking worth it. If it won't then I'm on a straight way to end my suffering, cause it's been a long time since I have fallen in love with a girl and I don't think I want to and have the strength to wait for another girl. I'm probably bad at reading signs, and you invited me to your birthday as a friend even though we know eachother for 7 hours.

Please, someone hire me already....

How do I find weather maps from the past for a specific region in America? I can find them for the whole nation but not focused on the area I need.

This is for a science project.

I am so fucking proud of myself. So I dropped out of University after 4 years of not going to lectures and failing the majority of my modules. I moved back in with my parents which sucked. Desperate to move out I landed a job as a minimum wage programmer, everyone has got to start somewhere you know...

Turns out coding is my passion after all, and those 4 years of university wasn't wasted. I launched my first used by the public application this week and it feels good man. I used to be a lazy sack of shit and now I'm a workaholic.

I guess that I am finally doing this...
Honestly, I have been doing decently well.
My health is getting better and I have a good paying job that lets me practice the skills that I need to practice to have the future that I want to have.
I have emotional support from friends and strangers.
My health is getting better and I am steadly getting my shit together.
But still, I have days where everything just is wrong...
I cant get out of bed because I want to kill myself, then I binge on insane amounts of food, feel worse, then stay in my room all day vaping and sleeping. I wont groom for days.
What is wrong with me?
Everything is very good for this moment in time and then the train just stops in the middle of the bloody tunnel.
WTF!?
This cycle is taking away all of the progress that I have been making and now I dont want to be outside anymore because off all of the weight I have gained from binging.
I dont want to exist anymore...

Isnt it funny how "exist" is one letter away from "exit"?

i'm almost 26 and my life is the same as i was 10 years ago, fuck i wanna cry but no tears is coming out, i want to pity myself but all i feel is pure hatred

Even though you might think different, I'm hetero. Straight as an arrow. I just think you where with me because of the sex. Not because I think you're a slut, but because I was paranoid as a fucking animal. Maybe we can be together again someday, somehow. I'm sure I'd want that because I truly loved you. Always will.

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>>18513313
Not that anyone read it but the cops just went to this guys house and everyone figured out I reported him. I feel like a monster. I feel so guilty. Everyone is mad at me.

>>18514547
There must've been secrecy?! How did they figure it out is what I'm wondering

>>18513313
>>18514547
Tell us the story from the beginning and maybe someone can help

Do you want me to call you darlin'?

>>18514556
I Told cps that the kid might have rickets. They brought a medical examiner and told them they were checking for rickets. I'm the only one who's ever mentioned rickets. (He doesn't have rickets by the way)

>>18514558
This toddler lives in filth. Hoarder levels of filth. And I thought the kid had rickets cuz his legs are all fucked up and I rarely see him out of his pram.

>>18514563
Yes

>>18514567
>>18514571
What did CPS conclude on the hoarding and what have the parents done about CPS becoming involved? How are you so sure they're aware that it's you?

>>18514536
You know that reads like some really confused thinking anon. I was in a situation somewhat similar and allowed my better judgement to be clouded by pure love for another that led to a messy situation. If there was a way for us to get together, I'm all ears to try figure it out. Truly loving someone you think is amazing should be enough to enable finding a workable solution, it's just so damn hard.

>>18514567
It was out of concern for the kid. And since the kid wasn't sick it's just a misunderstanding right? That's what I'm thinking. It'll be ok

>>18514587
The cops literally just left their house so I don't know. Also my bf asked if I reported it. My heart tried to jump out of my chest and I couldn't deny it.

>>18514591
Except one of his family members reported him for weed before and I could seriously fuck up his life. I'm a terrible person.

>>18514597
I'm legit freaking out about this right bowl. I should never have gotten involved.

>>18514612
Meant to type "right now"

I still struggle with the desire to tell everyone what you did to me. Both of you.

Even after you finally conceded to tell the truth, you lied. I can't believe the man-child you cheated on me with was the one to tell me you sent him nudes and declared yourself his girlfriend. "I'm not really dating my boyfriend anymore, you're my boyfriend now." I asked him whether he'd heard the conversation where we'd discussed your "friendship" with him, how it was killing our relationship. He hadn't, but he'd heard about how "abusive" I was, about how I, "treated you like shit." The exact lies I stomached whenever you were mixing prescription pills and dollar store wine.
But you know what? He knew better, because we were (WERE) friends, because everyone who knows me knows better. Friends, family, everyone.

I wasn't abusive. You were abusive. You threatened to maim me for cheating, which I'd never, ever do. You neglected my feelings and needs, yet you accused me of neglect. You stole from my family, from my fucking brother, my best friend. I can't count the times I needed to watch you while you were puking, or passed out from popping pills. Do you know what that was like? What it was like watching someone you loved hurting themselves over, and over, and over?
And when you weren't passed out you were flirting with him online. Remember that time you accidentally showed me what you'd written to his mom on fucking Facebook? "Hello from your future daughter-in-law." You didn't apologize, you said you were drunk and didn't remember writing that. But why would I expect an apology? You've never apologized.

I wasn't abusive, I was an enabler. I'm sorry, I wish I knew what I was doing earlier. When I was giving you forgiveness - for emotionally cheating, stealing, lying, for the things you said and did - I didn't realize I was giving you permission. Do you understand that I loved you? All I did was try to understand you. You broke my heart.

>>18514593
Like >>18514591 stated, you did it for a defenseless child's wellbeing so don't be too hard on yourself for that but by doing so you should of also considered yours and your boyfriend's standing: >>18514597 . I don't believe you're a terrible person but a little naive and quick to jump the gun.

>>18514617
We'll I sat on the decision for over 8 months and talked about it both on 4chan and with my mum. I felt so sure and then instantly regretted it.

>>18514597
>>18514612
>>18514615
It's okay, auto-correct is is a bitch. What state do you live in? Are you inside of the US? Asking because of the weed incident and I believe I can provide you with helpful insight for you and your boyfriend.

>>18514629
N.ireland

>>18514634
>https://www.psni.police.uk/crime/drugs/controlled-drugs-and-the-law/

In the US if someone phones the authorities of someone consistently using Marijuana it's normally perceived as a vindictive measure and goes ignored, in few cases authorities go to the house and speak to the person who uses Marijuana and may ask to do a search which the user can deny unless there is a warrant present. If your boyfriend is a known user or a reputable distributor chances are the authorities will show up and do a search.

>>18514588
Oh trust me anon I was and still am somewhat confused. She was also dealing with death in her family so I couldn't talk about how I felt with her as I used to. I told her just about everything and she's the only one who knows about the dark and empty loneliness.

I dealt with some severe paranoia, voices and stuff. Never saw a shrink or doctor because I've seen what pills does to people like me. I don't hear voices anymore but sometimes I feel theyre just sleeping.

The thing you said about being clouded by pure love, I feel you so much. But my paranoia got me thinking she's just a raver girl who never really loved me, just gave me reasons to fight through it all.

I think she's over me a long time ago anyway. I'm just a big mess you wouldnt want it.

>>18514648
I didn't mention weed though. Only the rickets and the mess of the house. And nobody knows I said anything about the mess yet.

>>18513973
You probably kept pushing them away no matter how hard they tried... maybe they have up, it's exhausting

>>18514616
And you.

You're not even worth the time it would take to write a post that describes what a self-righteous, slimy scumbag you've been. It was more painful that I'd anticipated seeing you in person, but I survived it. I pray that one day people will realize what a fucking fake you are without me needing to tell them.

>>18512824
^^this guy is a mental eff

>>18514658
You could confront the situation or ignore it and leave it as-is. If you're not doing anything illegal and have nothing to hide then you have nothing to worry about. Your boyfriend is making to decision to use Marijuana without medicinal benefits -- that was his decision and he should have considered all legal consequences when he took up using. However, I do understand this is your boyfriend and you worry for him, maybe this will show him the kick in the ass he needs to either seek a medical pass to use or give up Marijuana. As for the hoarding, I'd make weekly calls saying it's uninhabitable and unsafe for a child. If you can prove this case with photos to email the department or character witnesses you'll be successful and save a child's life. In your defense, hoarding is an unnecessary and nasty habit; nothing good will come of it and the parent's should be punished for willingly placing a child in harm's way.

>>18514663
Neck yourself, D. You were the fake one.

>>18514680
I don't think I was clear. It's my bf's friends son I'm worried about.

>>18514680
Thing is they don't even hoard anything. It's just piles of literal rubbish. You can't even see the floor.

>>18514480
good on you anon
if you need help with your next one, [nospoilersonadv]I'll make the logo[/s]

Its okay that you won't return my calls or respond to my texts. You weren't anything to me anyways.
I kept you around because you giving me sex. It was okay sex anyways. I had to force myself to cum because I know you felt bad when I didn't.

It's gonna be fine, I'll find another cocksleeve as I found you.
Stupid. I miss you. A lot.

I still don't believe that I was the only one to tell the truth when it came down to the judgement.

Did all the others really lie? Did they really think they could get away with it? That no one would know?

Strange. I don't believe it.

We keep flirting and you want me to make the first move, but I still hurt from messing up with the last girl I actually got on with by going too fast. I flip-flop from being talkative and flirty to almost blanking you from the anxiety of it, and I'm terrified it'll be too late by the time I gather the courage to say "fuck it, I'll try anyway," even though it feels incredibly selfish - not sure if I actually want to or whether it'd be to prove I can.

I'm scared of getting hurt by most people, and the rest I'm scared of hurting because I know I have trouble empathising with others. (It's not just you, even talking to my dad I get slightly anxious.)

>>18514694
In the US if CPS did an unexpected walk through, depending upon how bad the situation is, they could make moves to keep the child safe then and there. CPS would collect evidence as well. I know I'm repeating myself here but unless there's anything else you need to know or have insight on let me know. Idk if it matters but I believe you have done a good deed and as for your boyfriend, he needs to really get his shit together. Also remember in the future to make sure your shit is perfect and spotless before you involve the authorities in situations such as these. Like the bible says, let he without sin cast the first stone. Or another good one is: don't throw rocks at glass houses

>>18511204
I'm not messing. Just play along and don't shy away. What are you afraid of?

>>18514707
That's cool, you never made me cum anywaysssssss. I faked my orgasms the entirety of the time we spent together and you never noticed because *you*, fuckface, are the stupid one.

Iron man 3 is the worst fucking movie. It's just the fucking worst in so many ways.

>>18514690
Ah, knowing that now would make *me* react differently in the situation.

I'd be direct with my boyfriend and ask him to talk to his friend *if he did* and his friend did not change I would personally take photos of the condition of the house or have my boyfriend snap photos of the condition of the house and have him send the photos to me.
If my boyfriend *did not* talk to his friend, I would be direct and take photos standing at the door. No one should have a child live in that squalor and keep a good conscious about it.

If things did not change in 2 weeks time in either incident (or both) I would have phoned CPS and send photos before they arrive so they know what they're dealing with.

You and your boyfriend may lose a """friend""" but who would want a friend like this anyways?????

I want to die

Did you seriously make me cancel my plans because the guy you are trying to persue booked plans over my plans, because he is such a jealous piece of shit he can't handle you hanging out with your oldest friend in a platonic manner? Why are you so smitten that you have become oblivious to the fact he keeps making you hurt your friends and do bad shit because of his security issues? Someone really needs to kick his manipulative ass.

>>18514798
Sounds more like you're the jealous faggot that needs to realize relatiomships>friendships

>>18514796
For why

>>18514817
Because I'm being fucking tortured and have been my entire life. You guys have broken my mind beyond repair.

>>18514796
Shut up Abbie, you're not dying

>>18514805
Both should be balanced in their own ways but I do agree that more effort should be expended in a relationship especially if the couple does not live together. But calling >>18514798 a jealous faggot is unnecessary just because they're concerned for a friend.

>>18514819
Exxxxxtrapolate

>>18514805
They aren't even dating yet, and these plans predated them persuing this guy by quite a bit. This guy quite literally is making my friend cut contact with their other friends he deems a threat. I am sorry you think that is normal.

>>18514835
Your friend is probably the type that has to learn the hard way, anon. You can continue being there for them without being vindictive towards your friend and who they're pursuing but don't ever become disappointed or surprised if they flake on you

>>18514835
I highly doubt he's doing what you think he is. especially if the girl is already pining for him. It's all in your head.

I love these threads. I may be fucked but some of you people are way worse off than me. Throwing in the towel is not an option. Doomed to struggle til the day I die

>>18514844
Deliberately moving his plans over top of mine once he found out we were going to hang out is quite suspect anon.