Cocaine

>>18507787

When was the last time you slept deeply and felt well rested?

I was addicted to cocaine for roughly two years (this was the longest streak, I did it before and after that period too) and yes obviously cocaine is pretty awesome.

I also was struggling with an eating disorder and body image issues for most of my life, so when I discovered cocaine I would be high most of the time with the nice side effect of eliminating any appetite or feeling of hunger - so my cocaine addiction also heavily played into my eating disorder.
I got lucky and had the help of my family (not so much friends) in regards to getting to rehab eventually and I have a job in which a drug habit - and over a year of rehab in total - aren't a nail in the coffin. Also my nasal septum is basically non existant nowadays which sucks and is hard to avoid.

I don't really know what to tell you?

If you had to NOT do coke for a week straight, how would you feel about that?

If you're comfortable with the answer to that question, you don't have a problem... yet

>>18507818
has nothing to do with coke use, but its been a while (i cant sleep well at my grandma's ever and at my own place i woke up at 10am to hook up with someone) so sleep is fine

>>18507882
if only i could convince my family this

When you become addicted to a drug, there isn't just a physiological craving that comes along with withdrawal. An addictive substance also warps your rational thoughts. It also causes you to defend and rationalize your usage in a social context in a paranoid manner.

"They're out to get me. I can't let them come between me and my drugs. It's nonsense, right? We belong together. Morality is subjective."

The drug takes you by the short and curly, spins you around, and slams you right into the dirt. The presence of that secondary quality is especially concerning because it eliminates your exit from the feedback loop you've entered.

You take the drug. You feel good.
Youcan'tescape. So you take it again. You feel alright.
Youcan'tescape. So you take it again. You feel fine.
Youcan'tescape. So you take it again. You're almost there.
Youcan'tescape. So you take it again. You're not quite hitting the mark anymore.

And so on and so on. That psychological component of addiction forces backs you into a corner where you don't WANT to break out of the loop. This wouldn't be a problem if it weren't starting to take a physical toll on your body as well as on your financial resources. It's the ultimate imprisonment where you guard and punish yourself. And the addictive component eliminates any desire to put an end to that cycle.

That's pretty hardcore.

>>18507787
your mind has already made the justification that it's not bad. for us to prove it is bad, we need to know what you constitutes as bad, because you clearly don't give a shit about the opinions of people who care about you, or the opinions that professionals have to share. what are you looking for us to say that you haven't been told in person?