Some "friends" resent my lifestyle

To be fair, obnoxious as your friends are about it I do sort of see their point. It's not really about there being no point in living life unless you get married. But rather that there's more to life than trying to chase fleeting hedonism 24/7.

Either way I think you should not try to argue but shut them up by rubbing it in how rude they're being. Just a curt "I'm happy with the way I live my life and not looking for opinions" should do the trick. If they don't knock it off tell them it's getting old and after that that they've outstayed their welcome.

>>18500892
i'm in the same sorta situation anon

there really is no way to solve the jealousy of your peers who are unhappy and have convinced themselves that unhappiness is just somehow correct

you should allow them to keep saying that, because they are unhappy you should allow them to take pride in it, it's a coping mechanism

You're both right. You're not in the wrong for enjoying your life for what it is now, but they're not wrong when they say that your life will be a lot different once you get married and have kids (assuming that's what you want to do).

The issue lies in the fact that you and your friends are at different stages in your lives. You see them as resentful and jealous of you, they see you as immature. I don't know if there's any truth to either perspective, but my advice would be to find new friends where you're not at odds with each other, especially since you called them 'friends' in your title instead of just friends. That said, if you're over 30, you're going to find it difficult to find friends who are living a similar lifestyle to you.

>>18500920

Well, they're part of two different groups of friends. (Two in one group, one in another.)

I don't ever really plan on having kids - they're aware I'm not really interested in doing that, but keep insisting that my life won't be fulfilled unless I start taking things more seriously and look for someone to wife up and start a family with. It's caused a couple of heated discussions, but I try to avoid talking about it.

There's other friends in the groups that are childless and not in relationships, but they're not as... extreme as I am about being single.

But yeah, I'm 30, 31 next month and I'm aware I'm not going to meet a lot of new people who share my lifestyle, so my coworkers are becoming my friends.

>>18500905
This is exactly how I feel they feel, that "unhappiness is just somehow correct." Like somehow their lives are more fully realized because their wives or girlfriends yell at them and tell them what they can and can't do, or that they can't go hang out or enjoy a movie or play a game because they need to dedicate the time to a kid.

>>18500901
Maybe it's hedonism, but I still fail to see why I should force a square peg into a round hole when it comes to my life. If I got hit by a train tomorrow, I'd die pretty satisfied, having accomplished most of what I want to do.

>>18500966
>There's other friends in the groups that are childless and not in relationships, but they're not as... extreme as I am about being single.
>But yeah, I'm 30, 31 next month and I'm aware I'm not going to meet a lot of new people who share my lifestyle, so my coworkers are becoming my friends.
Honestly, I don't see you being able to keep up this lifestyle much longer without isolating people and becoming lonely. It's one thing to have fun being single, but you can't expect people in your life to not change and want to mellow down AND stay in your life. You can try and make new friends, but as people get older, they're not going to have as much time to spend with someone who is so drastically different and can't relate to them. It's like how some women lose friendships with their childless friends when they have kids.

This is something you need to think long and hard about, before you lose your friends and can't make new ones.

>>18500976

Talking about this constructively, and not trying to sound bitter, because I'm really not... but what is the point in compromising on a wife so I'm not "lonely?" Most relationships I see end up in ruin anyways - I'm hard pressed to name 5 couples I know over 40 that aren't divorced, on their second or third marriage, or anything reasonably stable. I've got... my cousin. Two friends of mine with still-married parents (one couple who fights all the time, mind you). And I know a lot of people.

What's the real benefit? With things like Tinder and OkCupid, I'm sure I can find women well into the future, without being at severe financial or personal risk because I got married. Kids are a different argument, because I get that they can be special, but they can also be a huge pain point.

I guess maybe if I had better examples of happy families in my life, I'd feel different, but everyone who is married and has kids seems so... sad.

>>18500999
I'm not saying you HAVE to find a wife or anything - that's your friends - but maybe tone down the 'singleness'? It seems like you've made it a large part of your identity, try stepping away from that. You say you're proud of what you've accomplished so far in your life, maybe focus on that more than "I'm single"?

And opening yourself up to the idea of a relationship, even if you don't get married, shouldn't be a huge drama, right? Who knows, you might surprise yourself and find someone you really like and can picture yourself growing old with. You've seen others' marriages fall apart, maybe you could learn from them and use those lessons for your own relationships.

>>18500966
You sound like where I'm headed. I'm 20 right now making around 80 or so a year, probably will be well over six figures within the next 2-5 years. I had a long relationship in highschool that didn't workout, and since then I can't seem to commit to anyone at all, not that I get laid all the time, I just have relatively low interest in a wife/kids. I get the sort of talks you're describing from family often.

The way I've always thought about it is that fuck what ANYONE says. There is no 'right' way to live life, assuming you aren't religious. If you are not harming anyone, do whatever you want to do. If chasing adventure or living a hedonistic lifestyle is what brings you happiness, do it. Why not? I have no fucking idea what happens after I die, for all I know we get reincarnated or there is an afterlife, but if there isn't, we have one fucking shot at this, why spend it living in anyway other than what you thinks best for you? Again, I consider myself a very kind person, but my whole purpose in life as far as I'm concerned is to enjoy it as much as possible as long as it doesn't result in harm to others.

I went off on a tangent, but I guess my advice to you is to try to explain to them that there is no right way to live your life, it's none of their business, and that you're happy. If they dont understand and keep bugging you, fuck em

>>18500966
>I'm not going to meet a lot of new people who share my lifestyle

That's not really true so much these days.
I'm too lazy too Google the percentages, but you can look it up for yourself as to the number of adults these days that have never been married and who don't have children. That number is much larger than you apparently think. I'm considerably older than you and also fall in to that category. Can't say that I've missed going to 2nd grade Xmas pageants or carting kids around to violin lessons or baseball practice.

>>18501021

Well, I'd like to say it's less about championing that I'm single, more than it is just doing things they can't do. I went to Hawaii the other day for five days. I met a girl. One of the guys wrote "oh, I wish I could do that, but I have a kid and a wife, like a real person." Same kind of thing about fantasy football. Same thing about spending my Saturday watching TV. Same thing about going to the bar on a Tuesday.

It feels like it's everything unless I sit at home and complain about how Timmy shit in his brother's bed.

>>18501021

You need to ween yourself from these married friends. It is obvious that you are bringing them down and they are bringing you down. It is not healthy for either of you. Again, there are plenty of single people around to do things with and it's not that hard to find them.....I'm surprised that this weening has not already occurred naturally--your interests now differ from your married friends--as they should. Your married friends who are now fathers should not have the same lifestyle as you do....But they should not make you feel less a person for that.

>>18501021

I forgot to mention... I am open to a relationship, I can see why one would be nice. But I don't like the idea of working to justify why a specific girl is "relationship material" or whatever. It feels too much like going out to buy a car that fits your needs.

I think relationships should only happen if you meet someone you really like, that inspires some great deal of passion in you, that you can't see yourself living without. Not just someone to make sure you're not "lonely."

I feel like too many people settle.