Don't know what to do

>>18500002
>I am just really indecisive and can't decide if I should just move on, but I've never really felt this way about someone before and it's a struggle to deal with these feelings now.

sounds familiar, however:
age difference isn't just a stigma. people change, almost all. if they don't change with age then they are a little bit on the dumber end of society, no personal offense meant. you will most likely change your general attitude about life at least twice before you are 30 and she will do 5 times before she is 20. are you sure you wan't to "risk" that? I know feelings make people blind, but it seems to me like you are headed for disaster.

>>18500055
That was one of the reasons I was hesitant to date her in the first place, and an extra reason as to why I ended it, but you're probably right, I'm just hurt and blinded by feelings because I still want to go back again.
But it was clear that she really did love me and desu I'm not sure she would accept me back now anyway, if I had changed my mind within the first week then 100% she would have but now it's a bit more unsure cause I know I hurt her.

>>18500060
I did not write "desu" in there, is this a new 4chan meme?

>>18500061
s.m.h. t.b.h. f.a.m all filtered to
baka desu senpai
Anyway it's okay that she's young, it's better than some insecure bitter 31 year old hypocrite who pretends to be wholesome and judges others while being far more disgusting than anyone I've known. Living fake lives with people online and whining about 4chan shitposting
Disgusting hypocrite with no moral fiber

>>18500060
I've loved when i was literally 15, and I love now 11 years later. it's not the same.

first time it sure is amazing and then sunshine and butterflies in stomach and then devastating when it ends. but you never feel like you are losing a once in a lifetime opportunity, because you aren't. you are too young to know yourself and the world around you. I think about my heartache back when i was 15 with fondness. it was a gentle lesson that strengthened me for the things that matter later in life. maybe this helps you think of "hurting her" as not the worst thing in the world.

as for yourself, it will sting but i am sure you are stable and experienced enough to deal with it and live on your life?

>>18500088
I hope so, but I'm still struggling to move on, and the fact that we still kept talking only made it worse I guess. I got rejected by someone I was very close with earlier this year and I moved on from that pretty quickly but the difference was she stopped talking to me entirely.

>>18500083
Yeah guess I'm a bit out of the loop don't post much here now. I was struggling to get over my own insecurities as much as I want to just say I can ignore other peoples opinions, I can't, because it's one thing for some irrelevant person to tell me it's disgusting to date someone that young, but I've had friends express their opinion of it (not knowing I was dating her) and I'm worried about what my parents would think.

>>18500002
>I'm 22
>she is 15
No; try to mature/grow up and find someone closer to your age to date.

>>18500118
Sure thing boss.
I knew I would get some of these replies (assuming I got replies). And I would normally 100% agree, but sometimes you meet someone who you really get along with and things happen. I definitely wouldn't ever recommend this to anyone else but everyone is different.

>>18500130
Don't be dumb. Don't assume older ones are really more mature, the one I just ended things with is 31 and more mentally fucked in the head than any teen
For all you know she's a gem

>>18500130
>sometimes you meet someone who you really get along with and things happen
Mate, that's just some bs you say to justify your hebephilic tendencies. I doubt there's a lot in common between a 15 yo girl and a 22 yo man. At that point you two are on completely different mental levels. Stop being a creep and find yourself someone legal.

>>18500139
Yeah I know she has a bunch of problems but we've discussed most of them openly already, and we get along so well. But at the start it was a genuine concern for me that she was just experiencing that teenage love and that it wouldn't last. I have a bunch of problems too (although most of them that affected the relationship involved the age difference) but we both genuinely enjoyed dealing with each others problems, not sure how to explain that but we both said it to each other multiple times.

>>18500147

I basically agree with this guy, would use nicer wording tho. I believe your "thing" could be just a circumstantial connection rather than truly having matching personalities.

>>18500147
If I could look at it that way and just move on I would have already. I mean you're probably right and that's what I should do, I thought that myself when it was all starting, but she was persistent in talking to me and she was the one who initiated everything and I started to love her more as it went on. I'm the one who ended it and so I should be able to move on but it still hurts. Anyway getting both points of view is helpful at least.

>>18500163
Yeah I mean considering how much we talked I can safely say we had pretty matching personalities to a point, enough to consider dating each other despite the age difference

You are not here for advice. You want to find enablers, and you will find them because it's 4chan. However out there, in more grounded environments, this type of a relationship won't be easily accepted. Many people will assume that you have unhealthy interest in much younger girls. It might cost you your reputation and friends or family members. In my opinion it's not a good idea to pursue the relationship with this girl now, especially since she has some issues and is therefore vulnerable and possibly doesn't know what is really good for her and can't make an informed decision.

>>18500174
Wow that's actually pretty helpful advice.

I mean I have thought about all those things many times up to this point but I struggle with making important decisions sometimes.

And you're partially right, I came here to see how many people pick either side of the argument and then the advice that makes sense to me the most will show me what the choice I want to make is. And desu a big part of me wants to just move on now, but I'm still struggling to actually do that I guess.

Most civilized societies have 15-16 as the age of consent. Don't listen to these people, go have fun instead of getting fucked by obese hypocrite psychos

>>18500195
well yeah age of consent is 16 here as I mentioned in OP but that wasn't really the issue it was more about the social stigma and my own insecurities about how my friends and family would see it and the assumptions people would make as >>18500174 said.

>>18500190
Personally I don't think it's wrong of you to develop feelings towards this girl, but it's unfortunate because like I said, this kind of a relationship won't be easily accepted and might cause you many issues I'm sure you would rather avoid. And you should keep in mind that most girls are fickle and emotional and teenage girls are twice as fickle and emotional, so it's hard to say how solid this relationship would be.

7 years is not a big of an age gap when, say, one person is in their early 20s and another in their late 20s. But she is still very young and so her mindset, life experience and maturity levels are bound to differ significantly from yours.

I know that you got attached to her and it hurts to let go. It's natural and understandable. In the end it's up to you but be aware that realistically having a relationship like this will be difficult both due to interior and exterior problems.

Good luck anon

>>18500223
Thankyou for some solid advice anon.

I agree that later the age difference isn't as big of a deal and I am fully aware of the issues surrounding it now, it was about a month of talking everyday before I said yes to dating her and I got way more attached than I thought I would so it is extremely hard to let it go now.

>>18500232
Maybe it's so hard to let go because you don't have many close people in your life? Try to branch out a bit. Regardless of everything, getting overly attached to one person might render you dependent on them and it's not good for your own personal integrity.

>>18500242
Yeah that's probably part of it, I have some close friends, and people I was very close to for a number of years but then with people getting busier this year and this relationship happening (which I didn't tell any of my friends about) I've sort of been a bit more distant the last 2-3 months, not that I've done anything to push my friends away, they know I was busy with uni as well anyway so just assumed it was that.

>>18500060
just be open with her. be like, senpai (or kohei in this case, lol wordfiler), you're like, kinda young. maybe we should wait till we're a bit older? we gotta be mature about this and make sure you're ready, right?

>>18500266
Yeah I kind of tried that and if I'm completely honest she kind of manipulated me into making a decision earlier which is why I'm in this situation in the first place.

Essentially she fell in love with me and I liked her but didn't want to do anything about it because of the age difference, and then we talked so much and so often that I realized I really did like her, and she could tell, and when I said we should at least wait until she was 16 before considering dating she said that keeping her feelings bottled up was too emotionally draining and that she would have to stop talking to me for a while if I said no. I get that that sounds bad but I had realized at that point that I really did like her and I knew it was cruel to continue being the same way with her knowing how she felt about me. And now after the whole experience I really understand how she felt not being able to say how she felt about me during that period because I feel like shit now not being able to talk to her like I used to.