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I just had my ex over last night, we broke up nearly a year ago but we've remained close friends ever since, a big portion due to me hoping we would be come more than friends again. She's slept over a few times before, we never had sex when she'd sleep over, but a few times we slept in the same bed we ended up cuddling the whole night and she low key got upset about it after the fact, cause she claims she didn't want that to be happening even at the time she went for it. But she slept over last night, decided to sleep in different beds so the chance of cuddling would be non existent (I have 2 beds side by side in my room). She decided to lay extremely close to me, even on the other bed.. as in, [ x] <- my bed, I usually sleep half off it with my arms/legs hanging off it. She slept on the other bed, [ x. ], basically as close as she could. She had plenty of space, as it was a queen, and I was on a twin. But still slept that close. So any who, we go to bed, I wake up about an hour later, she's close enough that my hands touching her (my arm is hanging off my bed, as I'm currentry cuddling a pillow lol), then rolls over a bit and kind of grunts/moans, she'd always do that when we were dating when she wanted something. So, I said fuck it, rolled off my bed right next to her, slid my arm under her head (she lifted up her head, then set it back down so I could get my arm in) and put my hand on her boob as I always would. Laid there for about 10 minutes, realized I p4obably shouldn't be doing that, slid my arm out, and rolled back onto my bed, put on netflix and went back to bed. Woke up numerous other times for the same reason. When we both woke up this morning, she was even closer, once again so my arm hanging off was touching her again. Mind you were both conscious, awake, and she still has 3/4 of the bed on the other side she could be laying on. The last time she slept over, in different beds, she slept on the complete opposite side of the bed. Tldr girl advice pls
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>>18485222
Don't fall for her again
You both broke up for a reason
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Also adding that I've been with other girls since her, and she's been with other guys, and I'm usually the type of guy to not give a fuck about a girl, as is normal for me with other girls. I dated her for a year, we've been broken up for nearly a year and I still find myself not being able to completely not give a shit about her, like ever other girl I've been with. Currently I'm not even looking for a relationship, unless it was with her desu. Idk. Just looking for general advice/3rd person outlook on the situation.
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>>18485222
>>18485238
> wall of toxic feels
It's okay to be friends with an ex. It's a bad idea to let her spend the night. You're in the middle of that shit now: she's spending the night, kind of leading you on, but you don't know, blah blah blah. Then you spiral into uncertainty, doubt, pain. You're already slipping into "I want her again" ("unless it was with her desu"), and that road leads only to pain.
This is toxic bullshit.
Set some goddamned limits for yourself if not for her. You deserve the certainty, as does your next gf, who won't take kindly to your ex possibly invading her territory. If you hang out with your ex, make it as friends not only in name but also in spirit, and don't let her spend the night.
Also, find a new gf who isn't going to play games with you.
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>>18485300
this desu
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Sorry, I didn't mean to say "desu", I dunno where that came from or what it means lol. Ignore that. And prior to last night it was a few months ago she slept over, but I brought it up a few weeks ago and she reinforced/has been bringing it up and obviously went thru with it. Thank you for the responses so far.
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It's difficult for me because we broke up because of me, not her. So I've always felt like she's the one that got away. But I've since evolved into a different person than I was back then, Im much better then I was back then. We used to talk about marriage and a family, she was going to have my kid at one point but she miscarried. It's rough.
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>>18485578
Jesus God, son, you're still festering in your toxic stew. Limits: set them. Not on her, on you. One limit needs to be never thinking of what could have been with her if only reality wasn't real and things had just been different. Slap yourself if you have to: feel the pain, because the pain is real and in the present which is where the fuck you need to be.
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>>18485564
I believe some words autochange on 4chins. I know f.a.m. without the periods wouls change into desu.
Let me try it again: senpai
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Oops. f.a.m. changed to senpai. Desu is something else.
Anyway, what side of the bed she is sleeping is immaterial. Either she is sleeping with you or she can go sleep at her own place. Be tough. Dont let jer play you like this. She is seeking validation from you by consistently dangling the proverbial carrot in front of you. Dont go for it. Dont screw with your head because you want to be the nice guy.
Also, there is no 'One That Got Away'. Everyone's shit stinks the same. No matter how good she looks, someone somewhere is sick of her bullshit.
DON'T PUT PUSSY ON A PEDESTAL.
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>>18487355
Shaking my head = baka
To be honest = desu
Family = senpai
Smh desu senpai
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>>18487355
f.a.m. turns into senpai
t.b.h. turns into desu
>it's board specific, if I'm not mistaking
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>>18485578
>>18486296 is only right if you don't end up with this girl
Let's focus on your chances and reasons, instead of where someone is lying on a bed and how arms touch.
1. How and why did the relationship end?
2. Are you even making advances, or informing her in some way of how you still feel?
These are crucial questions, so please elaborate.
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