Hey /adv/, was wondering if you could help me. I've had this problem on and off since I was about 14, but it seems to have come back stronger than ever now and I'm starting to get into trouble because of it.
Basically, sometimes when I'm talking to someone my brain will just kinda start thinking of the worst possible thing that I could say at that moment. Like the other day I was taking to a black guy at work who I'm friends with, but all I could hear in my head was "fuck you, nigger" over and over - I'm not racist or anything and I'd never want to say anything like that to him, but it starts getting so loud and desperate that if I don't say it I start feeling really sick and anxious. Literally my chest and throats are burning with the need to say it. It basically gets to the point that I have to go somewhere and say it out loud else I feel like something really bad will happen. It can happen in conversations like that, or sometimes I feel like I've got to just randomly say 'faggot' or 'cunt' a bunch of times until I say it the 'right way', whatever that is. My problem is that sometimes this happens at work and I'll say something not realising other people are around, and get in trouble for it, or people looking at me like I'm crazy.
Was just wondering if anybody knows what this is, or has experienced something like it? Thanks!
>>18484540
Possibly tourettes syndrome or some kind of obsession. I experience this kind of thing sometimes, mostly when something doesn't go the way I desire and I just randomly decide that it HAS TO. Never had it with words though. Have you had any similar compulses to do/say unusual stuff so you feel relaxed?
>>18484636
Not tourettes
>>18484540
This sounds like magical thinking associated with obsessive compulsive disprder. Go see a doctor