My girlfriend wants me to stop talking to my ex. The problem

Who do you value more? The person you're currently with, or the person you used to be with? Because I'll tell you one thing, if you value the person you used to be with more than the person you're currently with, then you should break up with your significant other so they can be with someone who actually deserves them.

>>18479171
The person I'm with.

But my ex is ridiculously sweet and I am quite literally her only friend. When I dumped her, in the middle of her tears she said "You'll always be like a brother to me". She would be devastated if I never talked to her again. I don't know how I'd cope with hurting her like that. I can't pretend not to care for her at all, you know? She has been nothing but kind to me and I feel like I have to repay her in some way.

you fucking suck OP. You are bad boyfriend, and not a friend to your ex, despite what you may tell yourself.

>>18479184
Honestly man it sounds like you actually do value your ex more than your current. Just break up with her because you haven't let go of what you had previously and it's unfair to her otherwise.

>>18479184
This shouldn't even be a question, like >>18479171 said. They are your EX for a reason.

Why is your gf uncomfortable?

How much time do you spend with your ex vs. with your gf?

>>18479150

Think about it like this; when your current girlfriend breaks up with you for being buddies with your old one you can get a new girlfriend. When your new girlfriend breaks up with you for being buddies with your old one then you can get a new girlfriend and when that new girlfriend breaks up with you for being buddies with your old one you can get a new one. When that new girlfriend breaks up with you for being buddies with your old one....

>>18479150
Fucking choose your girlfriend faggot

>>18479150
If your ex was your friend prior to you trying to date her, and if you want to remain her friend explain that to your current girlfriend. If she can't handle that she has jealousy issues and thinks you will be unfaithful.

>hurr durr people can't be friends after they break up
This is bad advice ignore it.

Another problem is that my current girl is manipulative and has hurt me several times in the past. Now, I love her dearly regardless, but what she's done doesn't exactly inspire respect. My ex, on the other hand, is angelic. I don't love her but I deeply respect the way she's behaved.

>>18479209
I barely spend any time with my ex. I send her an email every few days.

Don't let her control your life. Talk to who you want.

>>18479249
>Dysfunctional relationship
>Don't respect girlfriend
>Talk to ex every few days

I seriously hope this is a troll at this point. If not, break up with her dude. She has a right to be upset with what you're doing.

>>18479150
Uh it is ur ex bro lol. Just dump ur gf and go back to ur ex. U aint ready to move on. "I spent a decade with her and she'll be crushed if I left her". Nigga then WTF is she ur EX?

>>18479150
keep talking to your ex without you current gf knowing about it, quite simple brother

>>18479150
It's not your girlfriend's business to tell you who you're allowed to speak with. You are allowed to have female friends, even if those friends happen to be someone who you dated in the past. Unless your interactions with your ex are somehow above friend-level (I.E. flirting), your girlfriend is being very insecure and that will likely lead to more problems down the road.

>>18479321
THIS GUY. IGNORE THE KEKS AND LISTEN TO THIS GUY.

>>18479150
The last time a girlfriend demanded that I stop talking to my ex (who I had literally grown up with and who was being 100% strictly friends with at that point), I complied with her demands. My life promptly turned into a living hell as my girlfriend picked out more and more friends who I was no longer allowed to talk to - unfortunately, a lot of my childhood friends happened to be girls. Finally I realized that she was being emotionally abusive (in this and a number of other ways which I won't get into) and dumped her for good. A couple of months afterward, the original ex forgave me for cutting her out of my life, then later we started dating, and now we've been happily married for five years.

tl;dr - break up with your girlfriend.

>>18479460
I agree with this. Well, not the getting-back-with-your-ex part, but if your GF is so controlling that she's deciding what friends you get to keep, and you know in your heart that you strictly value your ex as a friend and nothing between you should cause conflict with your current SO, drop your current and get a new one who isn't so insecure, and also keep your old friend.

I'm surprised people are soon b with the current girlfriend. If you've given her no reason to worry, then this is controlling and insecure behavior and should not be tolerated.

If you're doing weird things with your ex, then fair enough to your gf.

>>18479150
>people actually take the time to whittle a fucking avocado.
really makes you think

Being friends with an ex is okay but if you used to date and you're her only friend that's kind of a unfair. She needs to learn to rely on herself or other people emotionally, it's kind of selfish of her to keep on relying on you and you alone.

>>18479150
Let's turn this around and see how you feel.
Your gf is still talking to her ex every few days. She has NOTHING nice to say about you, but calls her ex angelic. She insists she doesn't love him anymore, that she loves you, but she can't give a reason why. She is his only friend and he relies on her heavily.

How would you feel? Would you be okay with this? Wouldn't you want them to set boundaries? Obviously you are way too attached to your ex still, and I'm wondering why you're not with her instead of your current gf. You have nothing nice to say about your gf, but call your ex angelic. This isn't fair to her. Break up and get back with your ex.

>>18479787
I have a lot of nice things to say about my current girlfriend. She's amazing and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. She makes me feel alive. She's a rotten avocado alright, but so am I and I suppose that's why we get along so well. She and I, we're demons.

I do not love my ex, although I respect her deeply because she has showered me in much more kindness than I deserved over the years. I've had psychotic breaks, suicide attempts and I've been a lousy boyfriend but she was always there for me despite my sins.

I would be okay with my my girlfriend talking to her ex if she could give me a rational explanation for it.

>>18479636
She's currently grieving me, but I'm sure she'll make other friends with time. Honestly I'd be fine cutting her out of my life if it wasn't for guilt.

I can't not call my ex angelic. Her soul is purer than a fucking basket of puppies. That's not necessarily a good thing, mind you.

>>18479460
>got back together with ex in the end
Your gf was right to try to call you out on it.

>>18479249
>manipulates you and hurled you
Vs
>Angelical that always try to evade to hurt you.
It's your ex like fat or/and ugly and/or your current girlfriend really beautiful?
Because that's the only reason why I see why you would choose her over your ex,
to me, it looks you are really attracted to your current GF, but you don't really love her
And you love your ex, but are not attracted by her looks.
Just saying.

>>18480135
And every other female friend he had?

I guess if she freaks out about literally every woman being a threat, it's likely she'll be correct eventually

It doesn't matter if your ex is a saint. You need to prioritise your current partner over previous partners. Always. No exceptions. If you can't do that, you need do your current partner a favour and break up with her.

>>18480350
We are seeing this from his point of view, it might've been extremely sketchy from hers (like >>18480135 says, he got together with this ex his gf was worried about)

>>18480084
>we're demons rawr
holy shit senpai

>>18480097
> her ~soul~
holy shit senpai