So I met this girl and this looks like going somewhere. Last

Please?

The theme of /adv/ as a board seems to be guys getting really obsessed with/bothered by their partners' sexual pasts. I have never understood this, which makes it difficult for me to give helpful advice, but I'll try.

The thing that you need to realize is how little someone's sexual history actually matters in a relationship, barring a few unusual special circumstances. Is your partner at risk of spreading a disease to you? That's important. Is your partner belittling your sexual characteristics or capabilities in comparison to those of past lovers? That's important, and also you should dump them for being an asshole. Is your partner's sexual history in some way criminal in a way that could back to haunt them/you? That's important.

Otherwise, it really shouldn't affect you to know that your girlfriend wasn't a precious chaste maiden before meeting you. Think about it this way - you just found out that she might have sent a naughty picture to a past boyfriend. You were initially excited about having a naughty picture sent to you as her current boyfriend, so it's obvious that the idea of her sending naughty pictures to her boyfriend in and of itself is not what bothers you. So dig deeper - what specifically about this revelation is upsetting? She is exactly the same person that she was before your discovered this particular detail about her past. Your relationship is exactly the same as it was then. Nothing changed.

(cont.)

Also consider the fact that you have had relationships (and presumably sexual encounters) before your current girlfriend. Do you think that she would feel justified in judging you negatively for that fact? Should she resent you for having looked at other girls before her? Obviously you don't think that would be a reasonable reaction for her, or you wouldn't have made this thread trying to adjust your own thoughts and behavior. Try to question why you subconsciously feel that your girlfriend deserves to be judged for having a sexual past but you don't.

Honestly, and again I'm not someone who has ever really felt this type of jealousy (or whatever it is) himself so I might be off-base here, but I feel like the best solution would be to actually talk to your girlfriend about these feelings rather than bottling them up and letting them fester until they ruin your relationship (as they apparently did for your last one). Just be like "Hey I'm sorry for getting weird about that picture you sent last night. I've had issues in the past with overthinking my partners' sexual histories, and I know that it's unreasonable, but I can't really explain why it bothers me so much." Don't get judgmental with her about it. Just tell her that it's a hangup you're trying to work past. Having that out in the open will probably make it easier for you to process and resolve these feelings on your own.

>>18477899
You know, as long as there is no comparing it doesn't matter one bit.
I recently slept with my ex and we both talked about the sex we had had in the meantime. Imagining some other dude blow his load over her tits made me even hornier and made me want to "mark" her as mine sexually. She also didn't mind hearing that her sensual BJs were way better, even if less intensely stimulating than from a pro. So we did compare, but since the consensus was that our sex was still miles ahead of the competition I didn't mind at all.

>>18477899

Femanon here -- I feel the same when I date a guy. Wish I knew how to make it stop.

why would you expect a girl to take a new nude for you on the spot???

if it's night, we're probably in bed. We're not getting up and stripping and twisting ourselves into ridiculous positions in the freezing cold with unflattering artificial light to take a photo especially for you.

Most girls just take a nice set during the day when we feel good about ourselves, its a nice temperature and the lighting is good and keep them as stock for sending to boys.

Also we get asked for nudes so much that this is 100% necessary, and its possible she doesnt even like you. we just send nudes when asked because you mostly don't stop harassing us until we do.

>>18478558

Actually I didnt ask for anything, she just surprised me with it. Im rather shy in that regard so I really dont initiate things like that lol.

>>18478482

Alright I dunno. Different people different thinking. For me it's just thinking about it let alone hearing about it from her just makes me sick. It gets to point where I dont even want to kiss her anymore because the thought of what she had or didnt have in her mouth at any point in time before makes me disgusted. That cant be normal right?

>>18478303

Thanks, I really appreciate your extensive advice and I get your point entirely, just making my brain act accordingly is still a long way to go.

>>18477899
You're fine, but I wish you'd actually asked when and why she took that pic

I don't blame you at all, sex pics are for and during a moment, to show actual arousal. Sending 5 year old pics is dumb, unless they admit it's more flattering, which she could have, if you had given her a chance to.

The real answer is to just be more honest with yourself and with the girls, she legitimately could have just been shy and excited and sent a pic she thought would be much more flattering and quick and I suggest you tell her honestly about your jealousy and issue.

But I understand where you're coming from, you're not crazy, just jumped the shark a bit. You should have known about her history and how she is as a person by now to make a better judgement call

>>18478558
Uh no, flashing boobies in bed is not an art show ffs

>>18477899
>Im like yay
I understood what you meant by that, but you might need to check if you're gay, might be part of the problem. Sorry.
But seriously just try to remember this experience you had, store it in your memory, and try to remember how you reacted and attempt to restrain yourself from repeating that kind of action.

>>18479853

Basically after finding out it's an old pic my follow up question was am I the first to see this pic. Then she thought for a minute and replied something like just be happy I felt like sharing it with you.

She's done really well and didn't make a drama at all. I actually just felt bad for possibly making her feel bad.

>>18479878

Wtf?