Now or never

>>18465293
>asking her to be my gf

Aaaaaaand that's why you gonna fail. You are putting too much pressure on yourself and on her.

You just had a couple fun afternoons doing work. You are not even sure she is single. You don't have any reason to start planning on dating her.

Chill the fuck down. You are on the right track by thinking about inviting her somewhere, but a shooting range might be kinda weird and you are also going with your friends, so be ready for her declining that particular invite.

If the opportunity to hang out comes up, sure, go for it tiger! But don't wind yourself up so fucking much. As I said: As far as you know she is still dating!

>>18465361
I was just thinking shooting range since its something different not just a movie or meal like everyone else. Checked her facebook and she is single there too. What alternatives to a shooting range would you suggest?

>>18465377

I don't know what you like to do, I'm just saying there's a reason some dates are more common than others. People can be against or afraid of guns, for example. I'm pretty sure that doesn't apply to movies.

Also, the fact you already have group going with you, people she doesn't know, can be a good reason to turn the invite down.

By the way, I re-read your post and you say you spent ONE day together. I thought you kinda were hanging out or something. Dude, slow down. Please.

>>18465387
I get your point and yeah we have directly hung out for a day. But have had conversations for over a year. i get that im rushing but the point is i have one day to do something

>>18465397

No you don't. Phones exist. If after a whole year you still don't have her number, then don't expect a single, rushed day to fix that situation.

>>18465400
So just ask her to a meal or the movies?

>>18465377
Anytime I've pitched the range as a date, I've gotten overwhelmingly positive reactions.

>>18465411

If you think she is going to say "yes", go ahead.

But temper your expectations. Go one step at a time. Don't plan on how you are making her your GF if you haven't even gone out yet. Even if she says "no" to the date, don't take it personally. OK? She cn have millions of reasons to say "no" that have nothing to do with you. Chill.

>>18465417
I wont take it personally, i hadent thought that people are scared of guns. How about just suggesting the range since im going anyway if she says no ask what she would like to do

>>18465431

Try that if you want.

It kinda worries me that you keep avoiding the part where I tell you to slow down. It seems like you don't see how creepy it is to be planning on "making her your GF" when you haven't even had a first date yet.

>>18465438
I dont get how that is creepy, if im asking her on a date isnt the whole point to "make her your gf". Perhaps its just a culture thing between us and uk

>>18465443

I'm neither US nor UK. Let me ask you a question: How do you ask someone to be your girlfriend? Have you ever done it before? How did it go?

>>18465452
I would just ask "will you go out with me?"
I have done it twice both times they generally complimented me but said im not their type.

>>18465459

That's asking her out. You said:

>i was thinking of inviting her

>and then asking her to be my gf

Those are two separate things, aren't they?

>>18465476
Yeah i meant ask her out a few times (inviting her) then after a few successful dates then see if she would be my gf.

>>18465492

You are jumping over the previous step: the dates. Slow down mate.

>>18465495
As i say i really dont understand what i am supposed to do since everyother attempt has failed

>>18465499

You mean with her or other girls?

>>18465502
Other

>>18465504

What did you do back then? Why do you think things failed? What are you doing differently now?

>>18465510
Back then i was really nervous and so i want to try to be more confident and straight forward

>>18465512

So, you think the girls liked you, were interested in dating you, but your nervousness turned them off? That's you big takeaway form the previous rejections?

>>18465520
Yeah when i was a teen i was a little wierd too but mainly the nervousness yeah

>>18465524

You are telling me you are 100% sure those girls were into you and yet, when you actually asked them out, that was where they lost interest?

I don't think you are seeing my point: You are the kind of person that spends a year pinning after a girl and yet can only boast about a single afternoon hanging out. Do you not see the problem here?

You are building her up in your head without interacting with her. That's also a very big turn off. And you seem to assume that if you are into someone, they are automatically into you, too. I mean, you don't seem to contemplate the possibility that some rejections were because she just didn't like you, right?

>>18465534
No one has ever said no i dont like you for example the last girl said "your not really my type but your a great guy" if i see any indication they dont like me i dont ask

>>18465546

If you are not her type, then she doesn't like you. I mean, she likes you as a person, a friend even. But she doesn't like you as a "date", even less a BF.

>>18465553
I dont get what your point is reating to this girl

>>18465559

That you are, and maybe have always been, a guy that gets attached too much without really interacting. You also seem to have a hard time reading them, because you say:

>if i see any indication they dont like me i dont ask

Yet you also say:

>everyother attempt has failed

So you asked out girls that weren't into you. Several times.

And once again you find yourself at the same juncture. You spend a year going after her, maybe not doing anything but fantasizing. Then, after a single great afternoon, you are planning on making her your GF. And when I ask you why you got rejected earlier, you say it's because you come off as nervous, but this time you won't. Yet you are rushing to set up a date because you know you two will never speak again after this.

Settle down. Dating doesn't work like this. Rushed, desperate, not thinking about how the other person feels.

I don't really see this one working out. I'm trying to tell you that. Ask her out, whatever. But for everything I've said, I don't see her saying "yes". Hope I'm wrong.

If she rejects you, then please, try to take this words to heart and stop "chasing" girls. Meet girls, hang out with them, have fun with them. Don't build relationships in your head before they actually happen. Good luck.

>>18465579
Thanks man, i think i see where im going wrong but its so fucking difficult to read them. I mean if a girl invited me out i would go. Im imagining their reaction by thinking from their point of viee but i dont get a girls point of view it seems.

>>18465610

Maybe you need more than one afternoon to get a good feel of how she is, what she likes, and whether or not she'll be interested.

>>18465629
Dating is so fucking difficult

>>18465651

Actually, it shouldn't be. Crushes are hard, because they are not reciprocated. Dating? That's the part that develops with interaction.

A girl is not your GF because she said "yes" to a date. She is when she starts spending time on your house without previously planning it. When you eat together every week, several times a week. When you call each other for help and to pass the time.

Basically, she is a best friend that you also fuck. And just like friends, you don't decide that a relationship is gonna develop and only AFTER THAT you talk to them. You start by talking to people and THEN they become your friends.

>>18465660
Yeah i get what you mean. But in practice its jut not that easy. To be hinest i ha eonly uad a handful of friends my whole life

>>18465681

Then maybe your issue is deeper than just dating. Maybe you need to work on connections in general.

>>18465688
Yeah i have terrible social skills probably because of aspergers but im going to keep trying

>>18465693

I don't know if a doctor diagnosed you or if you are just using the definition from wikipedia. Either way, less moping and more having fun. You can't have a doctors order for friends. You need to go out and have fun.

>>18465715
Nah i have been diagnosed properly. It just explains alot of anxiety

>>18465745

Well, good luck. Don't let the diagnosis become a crutch. Remember, friends want to have fun. Be fun and make friends.