When i was a kid i never got to socialize with other kids (my

>>18465152
Your mother is a monster. Where was your dad?

>>18465152
Get some therapy man.

>>18465152
Yeah dude you really need to get away from your parents they are a terrible influence on you. They will continue to stunt your growth as a person the longer you stay with them.

>>18465176
I will definitely leave next year, as i'll be starting university and there are no good options in the town i live in. Can't wait.

>>18465152

Get a job anyway. Make money for yourself, save it, and run the fuck away from them.

Also,you'll probably have a LOT of trouble in your first job. We all do. Don't take it personal, firsts jobs are a pain in the ass.

>>18465152
Having shit parents sucks. I moved away at age 19. It was rough learning to be a normal adult. I even made mistakes of getting into toxic relationships since I sucked at socializing (I'm still bad at it, but not as horrible as I was in highschool).

Earn money, make an escape plan to move out. Good to hear that you are going to school. Don't give up on school no matter how stressful it can be. Keep socializing and network so you can a good chance of getting a job after graduating.

Taking into consideration how fucked up your life has been, you seem to be surprisingly well adjusted. You know what your faults are and want to improve. Good for you. Get a job. Apply for a college that is far away from home, if at all possible. You will be fine.

I AM 21 AND AM ON THE SAME FUCKING BOAT AS YOU ARE. We should make a club.

>>18465274
This, I'm surprised you turned out as self aware as you are. Hopefully some time away from your parents in Uni do you good.

>>18465274
>>18465300
Thank you, i'm really glad to hear that (even though i'n not sure how you got it from a single paragraph of text). I still have a lot of work to do. Luckily the situation at home has been a lot better in the last few year, though i still face some limitations. Nothing can compensate for fucked up childhood, but eh what can i do

>>18465233
>>18465276
We should really make a club

>>18465152

I have a similar story but not quite the same. My mother has deep anxiety and I got a good dose of it by being raised with her. My siblings are all about a decade older so I was basically alone with her throughout my upbringing. I had the option to socialize but recused myself. As a kid I didn't want to do anything, like ride a bike or learn to swim, so I didn't. I'm 23 and still don't know how to do either one. And still learning how to properly socialize. Which sounds sad but there's really no reason give a shit because in the adult world people don't care how you were raised. They care how you present yourself.

You have the self awareness to realize the way you were raised isn't normal and the way you feel is a result of that. So there's still hope for you, since you have some sense. Just keep working on yourself, anon. Nobody can stop you from doing that except yourself.

Don't feel shame for who you are. There's nothing you could have done. In my case, I don't hide the fact that I can't ride a bike or swim or anything that I used to be deeply embarrassed about, because it really doesn't matter. People don't recoil in horror at your own perceived ineptitudes. They're more concerned about what you're doing to better yourself. Never stop making progress.

>>18465493
This might be more common than you think. Whenever I'd try and make friends my mom would coach me not to trust them. Now I'm paranoid that evrryone I meet is either out to get me or is trying to make fun of me. Dad didnt do anything about out since he's an ineffectual aspie. I'm 22 now, its really a miracle I have an OK job

Hey OP. Same thing happened to me. My mother intentionally isolated me- if I ever tried to go out and play she would stand in front of the door and make up a chore I hadn't done yet that would take 10+ hours to complete before I was "allowed" to go out. My dad taught me to ride a bike when I was like thirteen on one of the rare occasions I saw him and a relative paid for me to get swimming lessons when I was 15 when they found out I couldn't swim. I was raised with the intention of making me a nonfunctional, broken human being. I've had some severe things to overcome, but here I am at 22- living alone and doing very well in university. If I can offer you any advice, it's to not let yourself become isolated. You're very used to being alone, and it feels more comfortable, but being around people is a need. It will make you happier and more well adjusted- please, please make an effort to get out. And stay the fuck offline & off drugs, it can be such an easy escape. You can do this, you absolutely can be a well adjusted and happy person, all it takes is a little effort.

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>>18465152
Looking back it feels bewildering how teachers would always say no talking during class, yet they never taught us how to socialize in school. I remember one time 4th grade teacher was getting interrupted so she said everybody talk for 2 minutes and then be quiet the rest of the lesson, I didn't know what to do so I just flapped my lips and made gibberish noises, while it seemed everyone else just knew how to talk naturally. I was a very fearful and gullible child, so I always did what I was told, never talked to anyone in class, and never made any friends- except when my mother arranged play dates, but I still never learned to talk to people, just rode bikes, played with trains, watched movies and catch butterflies together, never really talked, and once you grow up into a cold and alienating world where no one just gets together and plays anymore and you have to actually be good at conversation, I end up basically alone all the time. Which isn't that bad in comparison to the few times a year I actually hang out with friends outside of other activities, it just feels so boring and awkward, like I do enjoy their company, but just having to constantly think of words to say to respond to people is annoying and stressful, it also makes me feel uneasy since I don't like ot be submissive, but sucking at conversation makes me come off that way, lie I'm always letting the other person lead, but thats cause I just can't think of anything to say. Its 2017, if you want to know something, learn something, be entertained, be humored, you go on the internet, talking to people is just a burden, and isn't as fun even though I wish it was. Just eating alone and going for a walk can be a relaxing peaceful experience, don't have to worry about how fast you are eating, not talking with your mouth full, keeping conversation going, or getting too distracted trying to socialize to keep from slipping, tripping, bumping into things because your low attention span is being taxed.

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