Thread replies: 9
Thread images: 2
Thread images: 2
File: maxresdefault.jpg (15KB, 1661x931px) Image search:
[Google]
15KB, 1661x931px
I think I might be a monster. I don't know what or who I am anymore and I feel like I just don't care about anything but that's not true. I've done some horrible things, like really horrible things to people I claimed to love and care about. I've betrayed people, lied and hurt them because it was convenient for me.
One of the worst things was that I let my supposed ex boyfriend starve and live on the streets. I knew that I was the cause of it because I promised to help him but I didn't and I couldn't, but I kept making promises that I couldn't keep. He was homeless, he broke and I just left him to die. I abused his trust and mistreated him in the worst possible way. He called me a monster and I actually agree with that.
I don't know what is wrong with, I often consider just ending my life to rid people of me. I don't think that I serve any purpose other than to cause people pain and I just want my own pain to go away.
Honestly, I don't know how I can continue living with the things I've done...
>>
>>18461442
Stop romanticizing your life and go die the meaningless death you deserve
>>
>>18461468
Kinda know that but it requires planning.
>>
>>18461471
No it doesn't. You just want someone to tell you not to kill yourself, that you're not a monster, that you have hope. If you really want ot make a difference, slit your wrists right now
>>
>>18461476
Can't do that. My mums home with me and I know what I have to do, but it'll take time and no, I really don't want sympathy for my own pain. I actually hate people who can't see that I don't deserve it.
>>
File: 1498281829578.jpg (36KB, 500x510px) Image search:
[Google]
36KB, 500x510px
>>18461481
Eat it out. Drink it out. In fact, before considering suicide, try some weed.
You're just lacking something, maybe your daily routine is getting boring or worse. Try something new for a change.
>The weed is very good
>Hide it from the popo tho
>>
>>18461560
I've tried to drink it all away, but I live at home still because I have a chronic skin disorder and I'm supposed to start on systemic treatment. Thus alcohol is bad and they would notice if I continued. It's also highly unusual for their "perfect happy daughter" to get drunk during the day. They would notice asap. And the weed is idk, I've never smoked a cigarette in my life so heading onto the weed wagon... Heck where would I get it?
>>
>>18461566
Nice dubs.
Do you help anyone? Do you help out on chores?
>>
>>18461583
Do I help anyone? As in selfless actions or? I clean the house every day and keep it neat and tidy. I have a gardening project for neighbors and earn a bit through it, was meant to add to my savings so I could move out but then I got sick but I still do it, the gardening thing. I don't know if that's what you meant?
Thread posts: 9
Thread images: 2
Thread images: 2