life (first world) problems

File: image.jpg (87KB, 600x448px) Image search: [Google]

87KB, 600x448px

the title may seem weird, but it's because I'm having some serious issues, despite the fact I know my issues are nothing compared to most people even in the first world. I'll start by saying that I'm considered handsome, I'm tall and have a charming personality, I should be happy, right? not even close. I don't have any drive, any goals, either I despise myself or think I'm god's gift and everything in my life fucks up at one point

>every relationship I've had has crashed and burned
>forever acting upon impulsive behaviour, even getting myself into trouble purposely in order to try and get myself back out
>cheated on every girlfriend I've had
>dropped out of college twice
>have a job but I don't find it fulfilling, I only find the act of ripping somebody off fulfilling
>if someone even slightly hurts my feelings I'll rip into them until I can see they're visibly upset
>currently with a girl, she's beautiful, kind, we have the exact same interests, would do anything for me, never gets mad at me and is so supportive. already, I've started speaking to other people, I speak to her like shit and I'm generally just ruining it, but I know she'll never leave. I feel bad for going behind her back but I feel I'm just scared of her finding out.

I'm self aware enough to know I'm a dick, but the idea of having treatment for it doesn't seem great because I'm kind of okay with how I am. I don't even know what to do now