ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

What's your biological sex, orientation, and preferred sexual role?

http://www.strawpoll.me/13257722

You can answer even if you haven't had sex.

Girls,

You wake up to find out your bf/partner now looks like Henry Cavill. Thoughts?

>>18445280
yuck

>>18445283
He's objectively not ugly, but that's not the look of someone I want to have sex/spend my life with. I wish I could explain why.

>>18445285

He's objectively not ugly? Man, he is better looking than any other male or female on this planet.

Where do I find girls to talk to if I don't like clubs?

Most of the girls at my job are pretty uninteresting.

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>>18445285
>that's not the look of someone I want to have sex/spend my life with
Bitch say what

>>18445288
I have a hard time saying he's good-looking lmao. But he's symmetrical, proportionate, healthy, young, etc.. I like less heavy brow bones, softer jaws, narrower shoulders, and other traits generally considered to be more feminine. A lot of my straight female friends have similar preferences. I don't know if women have always been this way, or if it's developed with culture, or id it has something to do with chemicals, or what, but those are my preferences.

And it would be REALLY weird for the person I fell in love with to look totally different, no?

>>18445307
>I like less heavy brow bones, softer jaws, narrower shoulders, and other traits generally considered to be more feminine
>more feminine

Are you on your period right now? That actually explains it.

>>18445299
Online. Through your friends and family. At social events (concerts, festivals, exhibitions, etc). Join a club or class of any sort. Through volunteering.

>>18445311
I'm coming up on ovulating, actually. I might have even started last night/this morning. Not on BC, either. Don't know why I'm like this. You're right that it gets more extreme when I'm on my period, though.

Is it OK to date an older woman? She's 37 I'm 26. I'm attracted to her, she's attracted to me.

I still have my V card but have been attracted to older women all my life. In fact, it's been a long time fantasy of mine for a woman to "show me how things are done" that way.

>>18445273
What do you mean by giving and receiving? Because... I mean...

>>18445330
It is perfectly fine to date whoever you want as long as you're both adults.

To girls who have a boyfriend who isn't very attractive physically: do you feel like you've settled for him and would ideally like to be with someone more handsome?

>>18445336
But what about familial consequences though? That's what I keep going back to. Will my parents or other relatives think I'm weird or perverted in some way?

>>18445338
No. I love the shit out of him and wouldn't want to be with anyone else.

>>18445346
Are you in a minority? By that I mean wouldn't most girls "trade up" if they could?

>>18445343
It's odd, but I doubt anyone would care all that much. Just do whatever makes you happy.

>>18445331
Of course there's an ebb and flow of that and both are essential (to the vast majority of people's) sex lives, but some people get a bigger boost from giving or receiving.

I actually want to know if this is in any way correlated with sex/orientation, and if so, is that inherent or learned? Or is it totally random?

Fuck does the work on yourself and be confident shit really work if you're ugly as FUCK? I'm maybe a 3/10 on a good day.

No I am not fat, I lost the weight a year ago.

>>18445348
I don't know about other girls.
When I met my boyfriend I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. I literally knew I wasn't going to be happy ever again unless I was with him after our first conversation.
His appearance never mattered all that much. I never desired to "trade up" because I don't feel like there's anything better than him.

>>18445330
I'm thinking about dating a girl 20 years older.
perfectly fine and people thinking otherwise can simply fuck off

>>18445360
Oh well that's a pretty uncommon situation.

>>18445363
I just love him. It's not something so uncommon.

>>18445354
Yes, it will make you happier.
It won't necessarily get you a gf, but it'll make you less worried about not having one.

>>18445354
it does. Not on everybody, but still. It's worse if you're a girl, but still doable

>>18445343
They don't have to know unless/until it's serious. At that point it's worth whatever consequences bc you love her and also they should be happy for you.

>>18445338
My boyfriend isn't stereotypically attractive and for over half of our relationship (several years) he was pretty overweight after having a severe injury to his leg.

Basically:
-he's asian
-he's 5'6
-his face was kinda round (but since he lost weight he's got really nice cheekbones)
-everyone jokingly calls him steve aoki, but i think he looks better than steve aoki, granted the similarities are remarkable

So he's not what typical females like.

Idk, I was attracted to him in a really weird way. I thought he was ridiculously attractive but all my friends thought it was weird.

I honestly liked him the way he was. Now that he's lost 50 pounds and found a hair style that suits him, I think he looks absolutely amazing.

Regardless, I would have been attracted to him whether or not he lost weight. I don't feel like I've settled at all, and I really just can't process the thought of being with someone else.

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>>18445280
Yeah okay I'm down I guess.
Ideally I'd like him to look like a young Paul Newman
>tfw there are no qts like paul left

>>18445375
I wonder why it is that some people just fit well together and find each other very attractive even though they might objectively not be.

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>>18445273
according to this poll 5 femanons have voted and only 3 males. this thread is fairly fresh but imagine this are gender representation numbers on this board. no way i'm believing this. women aren't even real.

>>18445330
Sure. Just expect her to have problems getting pregnant, carrying it to term and the baby will have autism and other cool birth defects.

One thing is fetish and other is picking up life partner. Be reasonable. Fuck her with condom (dont trust the i am on pill meme), but dont date her for real.

>>18445354
Post pic. You are just insecure.

>>18445406
Adv is normie board full of insecure femanons in disguise.

>>18445406
these threads are femanon dominated.

>>18445330
My best friend was 17 when he began dating his then 37 year old gf. He's 30 now and she's 50. Still going strong.

How do I learn to do opening lines on dating apps?

>>18445438
>Post pic. You are just insecure.
His question is still valid if you're like 4-5/10 ie. painfully average

How do you comfort a female acquaintance/coworker who is crying but trying to hide it? Talking to guys is easier because you just walk up and say sonething like "everything alright bro?" And more likely than not they'll tell you what's up. I've noticed that girls would shut themselves out and that's understandable because nobody likes prying info out of you when you feel vulnerable. But still. Do I just say something along the lines of "we're here to help if you need anything", bringing to her attention that we are aware she is crying or do I leave her alone to her thoughts? That's what I did and I regret not saying anything and walking right past her.

>>18445478
Jeez men will do anything the instant they see a crying woman.

This is the reason you get manipulated so often you know.

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Girls, If you keep looking over at me is it because you find me creepy or good looking?

If you smile at me, is it bad if I don't smile back? (This is a personal thing, I'm not used to smiling at people yet.)


Also, can you please make it more obvious that you want guys to come over and talk to you? I don't really want to put myself in situations where I appear "creepy" or "thirsty" or some-shit, but I'm going to have to soon. I'd appreciate it if you could show me a better sign (Wave at me are something, say hello, ). I really don't understand why girls cant be the ones to initiate a little bit. I'm not asking for you to swoon me or some shit, that's lame, but at least letting me know that you show interest would be nice.
Girls should really be the ones to start it, just a little. Girls not being the starter makes it shit for everyone, the guys that you'd like (hopefully) are usually too timid to go out and cold approach women, and when they do, it most likely wont go over too well because they don't have enough experience. Most people fear rejection so, the girl ends up thinking guys don't like her because she's never been approached even though they do like her, and then she will maybe lower her standards or end up with some pump and dump dude who has been around enough to know how to cold approach and seem like a good dude even if he's not. The dudes who are more relationship oriented or quiet will try a few times, or even quit before even trying (See MGTOW), and that leaves more bitter relationship oriented people on both sides.

I don't really know if girls giving better signals would help, because I'd probably still be autistic and not notice them but, fuck if it isn't a start

>>18445503
>If you keep looking over at me is it because you find me creepy or good looking?
Depends. Am I smiling? Am I relaxed?

>If you smile at me, is it bad if I don't smile back?
I like it when people smile back at me, obviously.

>can you please make it more obvious that you want guys to come over and talk to you?
Not really, no. I basically never want guys to come over to talk to me if I'm just running errands or minding my own business.

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>>18445524
>Not really, no. I basically never want guys to come over to talk to me if I'm just running errands or minding my own business.


Then when?

>>18445383
Still waiting for the girl that's okay with a Seth Rogen copy (including the weight) that doesn't smoke weed and has conservative opinions.

>>18445531
At social gatherings. Sometimes it's fine to talk to me randomly if you have a good excuse (class, or we're waiting for the bus, or some shit like that), it might be nice. But most of the time if a random dude walks up to me while I'm running errands, it creeps me out.

>>18445541
It's me, anon. Found me.

>>18445450
The only opening line you ever need is "Hi (her name) !" exclamation mark being important.
A few girls will pre-emptively call out messages like that and say not to send them but you should not give a shit,send it anyway and move on to the next. No matter how "good" your opener is if a girl doesn't want to respond she just won't so the effort is pretty wasted.

I'll ask again.

Do women want masculine men or they want more feminine men?

It is going well with a girl, we met just randomly in uni, had good convo for an hour
Now I need to ask her, I know I do, but this shitty anxiety kicks in, this weird chest feeling
Cheer me up pls

>>18445491
>>18445491
>>>18445478 (You)
>Jeez men will do anything the instant they see a crying woman.
>This is the reason you get manipulated so often you know.

Empathy and common courtesy applies to both men and women. I know what you're talking about but context helps read intention. If they are alone and keep quiet odds are they want to keep things to themselves. If they do it loudly and in public they want help or attention, maybe both. As for "If there's anything we can do" I assumed it was clear that it meant anything reasonable. A ride home or discussing the issue, not something like $50

>>18445569
>Do women want masculine men or they want more feminine men?
I like masculine traits, in general. I do not want to date a thug tho.

My best friend is having a bachelor party and I'm engaged to someone whom I love very much.
This guy is known for getting kinda wild and I'm 150% sure there will be strippers/escorts or some shit there.

Ladies, what should I do? I might be a stick in the mud but should I back out of the bachelor party?

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>>18445591
Go forth, and ask her out

I'm rooting for ya mate

>>18445599
> I totally have just as much empathy for men I just choose not to act on it. I totally don't just tell them to man up butch if I see them crying

>>18445602
Just don't fuck anyone else and don't get too close to strippers.

>>18445612
>>>18445599 (You)
>> I totally have just as much empathy for men I just choose not to act on it. I totally don't just tell them to man up butch if I see them crying

I don't think anyone does these days. If your friends do that to you you have shit friends.

>>18445541
Seth Rogen is handsome though, just overweight. His facial features are clearly attractive.

Ladies:

Last year, my ex was in a severe accident while backpacking where she broke her back and permanently damaged part of her nerve system. Since recovering and all, she's gonna go on a backpack trip next week again with a friend.

I was thinking about sending her a card wishing her a great trip and well. Mainly because I also know that she feels like she can't talk about her situation with a lot of people. We have no contact anymore since 1,5 months or so.

Yes/no? Just a text?

>>18445569
Personally. I just want a guy who is confident and secure enough in his sexuality to wear what he wants to wear and act how he wants to act regardless of whether his attire or behavior is seen by others as feminine or masculine. To simplify, a guy who doesn't care about being masculine or feminine but rather he does what he wants and doesn't care what others think.

If I behave attractive, masculine all in all comfy and confident with a girl, but never push for kiss/sex (only mild contact like hug), how high are the chances she will start initiation at least with signs or things like "I actually like you a lot", assuming there is initial attraction?

>>18445270
Is it wise to tell a girl how I feel about them if they have a bf.

I really like this girl but i don't know how deep her relationship is with her bf is since they have broken up and got back together many times and what I've heard from friends and what my impression is they are just together because of convenience more than anything

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Guys:

How long on average does it take you to cum? Lost my virginity to my gf who I've been dating for almost a year now and it can take me anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour of penetration to cum. My gf loves it, though sometimes her orgasms get really intense and put her out of commission and I wind up left unsatisfied. This is the literal opposite of how I expected it to be and I'm not sure if bae just has an under stimulating vag or if my dick is just armored.

This is sex without a condom and after not fapping for a while.

>>18445366
>>18445367
And how do I become confident?

>>18445438
Fuck it, I need to know. Bear in mind:

>I'm pushing my jaw out because I have crazy overbite that i need to fix, I'm a total chinlet
>I have really fucked up teeth that I'm saving money to fix (I'm talking missing half a canine, other canines are overlapping, frontal teeth all crooked)
>My beard grows like pure shit
>My frontview is the best one, my profile is atrociously ugly

Also I look much worse than on this picture IRL

>>18445632
Yes, so she can cut you off.

>>18445636
Look dude, in this pic I'd say you are a honest 6.5/10.
Fix your brows and hair a little bit. Shave your beard.

>>18445635
>>18445569
Y'all gotta stop re-asking questions.

>>18445602
Ask your partner?
Personally I would consider bachelor/bachelorette parties as cheating.
I wouldn't go to one or want my partner too.

>>18445636
Caring about your appearance and wanting to improve yourself to meet your own standards of beauty is one step in the right direction. Being primped and polished is a big confidence booster for both genders.It subconsciously makes us act more confident by changing our speech patterns and body language to make us appear very social and very apporachable. When you feel like you have improved yourself, you let down some of your guards that make seem offputting (like hiding your teeth or lowering your eyes)

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>>18445650

The only reason I'm re-asking is because the old threads died before I could actually respond. Shit was at 4 AM and I needed some sleep my dude

>>18445653
>hiding your teeth
Not the same guy but my teeth almost don't show when I smile, my lips just kinda stretch and a bit of my upper teeth are visible but that's it.
Dentist told me it's because my upper jaw is too high or something and surgery is out of the question
I look decent otherwise but I basically have a really shitty smile.
What do?

>>18445602
if you really want to go to support your friend, tell your partner and get their input first. Explain the nature of the party and the likely situations you will be exposed to but reassure that you will not be participating in any illicit activities. It's not cheating if you don't participate but are merely there to support your best friend. it's best to be honest about it than hide it and then your partner finds out about it later. Be honest to your partner up front, let your friend know why you can't go or why you will only go if he promises not to push you to participate in certain activities at the party.

>>18445626
Bump

>>18445626
Just a text.

>>18445644
Honestly I'd almost buy it because the pic came out decent, it's much worse IRL.

Either way, how to fix brows? Never done it, I just remove the unibrow when it gets too obvious and that's it.

>>18445653
I've been trying some things. I lost weight, started doing some exercise, even try on some skin products (my skin used to be much worse)
but there is still so much about my face I hate.

>>18445679
What's your height/weight? Just wanna know

>>18445665
smiling itself is good enough so long as you aren't trying to hide it. making eye contact draws attention away from the mouth and is an intimate act that can communicate understanding and form bonds. and veneers can add length to your teeth so they show a bit better. i dont have much tooth in my smile but i don't think it looks bad. I actually hate when you can see people's upper gums when they smile. so gross like a horse!

>>18445689
I noticed I subconsciously held back when smiling so I'll try to avoid doing that too. I was just worried because everyone always says a nice smile is attractive.

>>18445679
everyone has a list a of things they hate about themselves but the truth is it really just depends on the day. it's something everyone does: they hate certain things about their appearance in varying degrees on different days. sometimes we feel like crap and sometimes we feel great about ourselves. it's more of a psychological thing than an indicator of our true attractiveness. start by being healthy on the inside, get sleep, exercise, stay hydrated, eat balanced. then you actually start to see yourself more positively.

>>18445682
Turbomanlet
5'8'' and I think around 155-160 lbs

>>18445705
I know, it's just I can't really think of many things I like about my face especially. I just don't see anything good in it.

>>18445713
You're fine man. You're average and your face actually looks kinda good imo. If you got a good haircut you'd be a 7 in my book.

I asked a girl out for coffee last year (and before that, to go to some art convention with me). She said she was busy with college and we should text later and see but never did. Anyway that was back when we had only recently met. After a year we grew closer and get along great. I think I might have some hints that she may like me though maybe it's just random stuff and I'm thinking too much about it. I wanna ask her out again now.

Anyway, 2 questions: Since last time (a year ago) I asked her out for coffee, should I pick something else this time just in case? Or coffee again? I know it's just asking out and not a big deal but I think my problem is just how to word it.
Also, I'm kind of battling depression (I can hide it in person), is it a bad idea to think about dating in general? (I mean if she rejects me and it affects me more than it should).
Thanks.

>>18445713
Looking at pictures of actual ugly people can help.
And stop comparing yourself to celebrities or traditionally handsome people. Everyone tries to achieve one standard of beauty when in actuality, attractiveness is incredibly diverse. And if after all has failed, plastic surgery is always there for both men and women.

>>18445713
that's average height

For girls, how much does a person who has difficulty showing feelings put you off? I think a good relationship would help me improve at it, but it's hard to find one in the first place when you're this way.

>>18445738
Coffee is good, it's cheap and easy so if she rejects you, no loss. Just say "hey, just would like to know if you'd consider us two dating. i feel like we've gotten to know each other pretty well and i like you very much and i would like to take the next step if you feel the same." something like that. and if she rejects you, just remember that her rejection is no indicator of your worth and you can move on from there.

>>18445758
difficulty showing feelings isn't so bad so long as you compensate through your actions.

How come a women's orgasms has twice the number of contractions and yet women still shy away from sex.

>>18445812
Because most men cannot make women orgasm.

>>18445830
I can already picture myself, if I ever get to have sex, posting desperately on /adv/ a few moments before. "Help how do I make a girl orgasm nervouspepe.jpg"

>>18445812
Women aren't as motivated by pleasure, there are many more requirements that must be met. differing from woman to woman. to be simple we are picky and want more than just pleasure from sex, we want intimacy, companionship, etc. and you cant get that from a one night stand or just any guy at any time. if the guy were good enough, the woman would be as open to sex as he is.

>>18445478
You can still say "everything alright, bro?"
If she doesn't want to talk about it, say "We're here to help if you need anything"
It's likely that you two aren't close enough for her to talk about it.

>>18445812
Because men are too selfish and/or shit at sex to make a woman cum.

>>18445830
>>18445839
>>18445843

How do I become good at it. Lick the clit like my life depends on it?

>>18445845
Be seductive. Fuck her like you need to do it or die. Be passionate.
Put effort in foreplay.
Pay attention to the way you move when you fuck her.

>>18445758
It's all about compatibility. I am a huge open book and talk TOO much about my feelings. I would probably talk less about my feelings around you. I would worry a lot about what you were thinking. It probably wouldn't work out with us, since I am so conversationally based. I work through my problems by talking about them.
Now a girl who is sick of constantly having to talk about feelings all the time? She'd love you.

I'm part of a groupchat and we were teasing this guy. Basically we were teasing him about sex and implied that he might be bi or asexual and he was joking in the chat too, saying that we will never know for sure

then he sent me a dm saying he's not bi or gay and most definitely not asexual

Am i reading too much into this? Did he just message me to clarify this or did it have like second meaning??

>>18445839
>want more than just pleasure from sex, we want intimacy,

But guys want more than just pleasure too. The fuckbois of this world have ruined it for the men tbqh with you senpai.

>>18445870
Hmm, I'd say he's probably interested in you. Otherwise why would he care?

>>18445870
>>18445884
he is probably interested, yes. But he could be also autistic, like so many anons here.

>>18445870
>>18445884

There are so many ways this can be explained other than "he likes you"
>he's closer to you so he cares what you think
>he likes you more so he cares what you think
>he cares what you think more than other people for some other reason
>he's aware that girls can spread shit and doesn't want it getting to a girl he actually likes

And how do you know that you're the only person he's messaged about this too? He could have messaged, for example, two of the five people in the group chat because he wants to clarify it for whatever reason. You're overthinking this.

And like always, if you like him, ask him out.

>>18445812
it's not sex, they shy away from you.
wear a paper bag on your head or sth

>>18445895
Tbh I only said what I said because I'd probably do the same. Then I'd probably do something autistic like ask her to introduce me to some girls or help me find a gf.
>>18445900
Good point I'm probably just autisic

>>18445845
>>18445845
any part of the body can be a pleasure point. caressing the skin, getting close to neck, kissing arms, legs, back, etc. holding, being close, transitioning from soft and close to rigid and hard. it's a journey really, getting a woman to orgasm.

>>18445715
>>18445745
I'm the shortest one among my friends. The average around here seems to be 5'11' or so.

Also, what kind of haircut should I try?
>>18445740
I've honestly entertained the idea of fixing my nose and my jaw a bit. I try to compare myself only to people of my day to day and I find myself lacking.

>>18445866
That's a good perspective, thanks. Personally though I'd find a girl who talks about her feelings fascinating, as someone who struggles showing emotions I find genuine passion hugely attractive.

>>18445338
The only ex I've had was cute but definitely not the best looking out of the guys who hit on me.

I can't speak for everyone but from what I know my stance isn't uncommon, and honestly real superficial beauty is only a really minor part of sexual attraction for me. Sure I like to look at nice looking guys and they catch my eye more quickly if you are talking about complete strangers. But beyond the very first impressions, my favorite is always the guy who has charm (smiles easily, expressive face, kind eyes), who I have chemistry with. In theory every single other element being equal, I would pick a good looking guy over an average looking guy. But in reality it's not like that at all. It is rare to find a person you truly connect with, both on a level of personality and on the level of sexuality. Someone who does not just like you and actively desire you with all that comes with it (being a real partner, a good listener, being bountiful with affection etc) but also appreciates in you what you value yourself. Who approaches you sexually the way that works for you. There was no single human being alive that I desired more than my ex, period. I could remember a certain look or croak in his voice during an intimate moment and be soaking wet. Nothing I've ever felt for a stranger could stand to compare.

I don't think this is something you can really understand if you haven't experienced it (no offense intended at all, just in case you haven't and can't relate). If you had a girl who was cute enough but not outright hot - but you knew that behind closed doors she ravished you like you were her last Earthly dinner, all her skin smelled like the best thing you ever had the pleasure of experiencing, she knew just how to wrap her arms around you when you were down and so on you bet you wouldn't be that easily impressed with a beautiful girl walking by.

Basically, getting with someone hotter does not necessarily mean "trading up" AT ALL.

>>18445938
Did something just "click" with your ex when you met him or was it after getting to know each other that you felt that attraction?
I've never had that impression with anyone but I do lack experience.

>>18445812
>>18445830
Is right. It's not even just a matter of the female orgasm being an enigma, most (young) men just don't understand that the porn routine is entirely based on what works to get men off.

For women faster and harder isn't necessarily better. Foreplay is a build up that makes sex more intense, not something to get over with. Penetration isn't the holy grail, particularly for women who don't climax easily from it.

Not trying to imply that every man agrees with this vision of sex but you get the idea.

How do I know if a guy is talking to me because he's bored or because he likes me? I'm currently unemployed so I've taken up swimming at the pool near my house since it's an affordable reason to get out of the house. There's a guy there who works as a lifeguard who I have a developed a crush on. We chat for ages about anything whenever we're I'm there. Since it's really quiet (it's winter where I live) when I'm usually there, how can I tell if he's only chatting to me because he's bored? I used to chat to customers when I was a barista when it was quiet in the cafe I'd worked at or else the shift would drag on. I am also reading into things like this too much because I'm really bored as a result of not having a job and locked in the mundane routine of looking for jobs and barely getting interviews.

>>18445950
I did like him from the start, but just in that regular way where you find someone engaging. He did not stand out to me. This attraction grew with getting to know each other, developing a dynamic and learning how playful and pleasant he was, ultimately learning just how compatible we were sexually and then just how grand it felt to be in his arms.

I definitely did not know right away and am sure I could have felt the same way about other men if we were also on the same wavelength.

>>18445957

I don't buy it. If anything the men are too focussed on her having a good time. Atleast that is what I've seen in college campuses (The liberal and educated crowd).

>>18445964
Interesting. Thanks.

>>18445900
You're right thanks for the reality check

It sucks....

>>18445966
Being focused on her having a good time is not the same as realizing what kind of sex most women enjoy. Many men do try to fuck like a porn star because they think (or assume subconsciously) that this is the way it's supposed to go.

Also, women want confident men, not lovers who are so nervous and desperate to please that their primal arousal does not show. That is a completely separate issue from whether they want the full package of physical intimacy or to be jackhammered like a fleshlight.

When talking to girls should I look at them in the eyes all the time and wait for them to avert their gaze?
t. autismo

>>18445553
>>18445622
I've been told that I have attractive facial features by my IRL friends but /soc/ has never rated me more than a 5/10, even when I was skinny.

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to girls,
my gf sends me nudes sometimes when in the mood, is it a bad idea to send dick pics back?

>>18445972
Like I said, if you like him, ask him out. Don't sit there waiting for things to come to you, go and get them yourself. Being proactive is how you get things in life.

>>18445926
well if you are going to change yourself, dont be too drastic. a big difference in before and after or multiple procedures is a sign of low confidence and insecurity which may be a deal breaker for future partners should they learn of the surgical history,

>>18445960
there's no distinction.
he is both bored and possibly interested in sex/relationship/whatever. he's 'interviewing' you, to determine what options of interaction between you two are possible and what options would he like to realise.

it's how humans work in general

>>18445977
Don't, unwavering eye contact is acceptable in exactly two situations: when you're about to fight and when you're about to fuck.

Look them in the eyes but every couple of seconds you break it for a moment, then find it again. Study others to see how it's done.

>>18445979
Don't go straight for the dick... let her build up to it. Send a pic of your chest, or your bulge, a hand suggestively disappearing in your boxers etc. Not in your face erection.

>>18445966
not a gender thing. I've slept with some women who genuinely cared and tried to reciprocrate the pleasure and some who would think only about their own pleasure as well.

Hey

Some girl and I had a connection (ie strong eye contact which you know is mutual/teasing/occassional physical contact/going out together/takes interest in your interests) but I think she started ignoring me.

We'd sometimes hop in and out of each others dorm room for small talk if we knew the other was there but that has kind of stopped since I went to her the last 2 times and I don't want to come off as needy/clingy.

Is this some kind of test or has she lost interest?

>>18445635
Somewhere between 10 minutes to 2 hours to never. Mind was a kind of mental block though (probably brought about by a horrible first experience).

It wasn't even until I met my girlfriend a couple of years ago that I could cum at all (even though I'd had experiences past where I definitely amazing enough I wished I could have) At first I could go days without cumming (literally). After about 8 months of being with her, I started to be able to after about 2 hours. Gradually that time down until I can now consistently cum within 10. I just kind of learned to let go, focus on my own pleasure, and do what I need to do to get off--though if I don't do that I can also never cum since it oddly requires active mental effort to "let go" for me.

Could be the same for you, could not, who knows.


>>18445872
>But guys want more than just pleasure too

Not for seemingly 3/4th of them while they're in the 10-25+ year old range.

Sad, but kind of a truth. This is especially exacerbated because it tends to be only those types that actually approach women with any regularity.

/signed a guy who wants more than just sex, has many male friends that want just sex, and many female friends who have met guys who want just sex to the point where almost literally every girl I've slept with has called me so different and weird, and sweet, and blah blah blah because of it (and it legit has caused me some headaches the few times all I wanted was sex and was upfront about it)

I've literally lost count of how many girls I've been out with where they flat out said I was their legitimate first time going out on a proper date and being romanced, and also of how many female friends had admitted that they never had either, but kind of wistfully mentioned they wished they were.

Fuck dude, I've even TRIED to get more of my male friends to do it, because if nothing else, it's novel, but nah, the thirst is too strong when they can put in the minimum.

It's pretty nonsense.

>>18445981
I never asked a guy out and I have no clue if he likes me even a tiny little bit so I feel like asking him out would be too risky

>>18446002
How'd you romance them?

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IS SHE FUCKING INSANE WHY THE FUCK WOULD SHE DO THAT SHE WAS A LEGIT 10/10 MILF RE

>>18446020
Constant scrutiny. You don't realize it if you're a regular person but if you do enough research there's so much of;
>x celebrity was seen leaving the store, age really starting to show

It is already difficult for most normal people to have a healthy sense of perspective in terms of their looks. Let alone when you are judged so harshly on your physical appearance and (especially as a woman in the spotlights) kind of expected not to age... really easy to get a skewed idea of what you look like and try to ease it somehow.

>>18446020
I'm no joke crying right now.

>>18446031
Also for the record this doesn't just happen with age but also (perceived) pregnancy, gaining or losing weight etc.
It's just a huge business constantly giving people faux news on everything to do with celebrities and particularly what they look like. There's a whole rabbit hole.

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>>18446020

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>>18446020

>>18445978
Actually now that I look at myself I think I have some Andre the Giant mixed in... just without the height.

>>18445928
I did jump to conclusions, because I've found that people who don't show their emotions often are uncomfortable when other people show emotions. They seem to not want to talk about it. If you can encourage that kind of girl to talk about herself, and assure her that you enjoy hearing about what's going on in her head, then she probably won't slow down.
If it's something that you enjoy, then that actually is a bonus. If you find someone who loves talking about themselves, then they're going to love that you want to hear them talk about themselves. I know that I was pleased at your phraseology of describing it as "genuine passion". I can get insecure about it, since I worry about seeming vain or self centered.
But we are the main character of our own lives, right? I take a lot of time with my introspection in order to understand and improve my life. I use it to try to be a good person and help other people. Though sometimes I feel selfish.

Well, I'm glad that my perspective was helpful for you. Thank you for taking the time to respond!

>>18446000
She might be stressed out, she might be interested in someone else, she might be constipated, she might be second guessing if you really like her, she might have realized that you're awful, she might be thinking that she's been coming on too strong, she might be thinking that it'll never happen so she should stop trying, she might be hungry.

Who knows. Don't stop talking to her.

>>18445979
I agree with this >>18445988
>Don't go straight for the dick... let her build up to it. Send a pic of your chest, or your bulge, a hand suggestively disappearing in your boxers etc. Not in your face erection.

Tease her, keep things just out of frame, make her ask for it

>>18445986
Man, great post. I really like how you phrased this.

>>18445950
I relate a lot with the other anon, and I felt it after a couple days of knowing him. We talked extensively during that time, so I got a bit of a head start. The attraction did turn on like a light switch, though. One day, realizing he's pretty cool. Next day, realizing that he's really compatible with me. Next day, SUDDENLY I WANT TO MAKE BABIES

>>18445964
>>18445938
Very comprehensive. Thank you for your effort.

>>18445352
but do you mean "giving/receiving" as in penetrator/penetratee, or who initiates the sexual acts?

>>18445273
I was also confused about giving/receiving.
Because I'm a "giver" in the sense that I like to serve. I'm a sub. A Dom would receive what I give them.
But I assumed that this meant in the context of penetrator/penetratee, like the other anon mentioned, as I've heard it referred to in the gay community. So I put myself down as a "receiver"
But a bunch of ladies are putting themselves down as "givers".

I don't know who is right. Or we just have a bunch of Dommes.

How long does it take for a guy to decide whether he likes a girl enough to make her into a girlfriend?

>>18446330
2 weeks

>>18446330
it really depends
for me it was usually about 10 hours (the time between the first meeting and the end of the first sex). I estabilished two good LTRs this way.

but it may take months as well

>>18445273
>>18446292
I'm surprised how much "confusion" there's been over this.

I mean "giver" as in someone who likes to give their partner pleasures more than they like to get it themselves. "Receiver" is then the opposite of that. It doesn't mean you don't care about yourself or your partner. It's just a preference, not a strict binary.

>>18446330
I've never had a gf, so I wouldn't know absolutely, but I'd like to go on at least two dates before I call a woman my girlfriend in earnest. I'm honestly enough of an autist to ask her, and take her answer from there.

>>18446347
Aw shit. I put it down wrong then. I've heard it as "giving the dick" and "receiving the dick", aka Tops and bottoms, aka Doms and subs.
There are subtleties to each pair, of course.

Have you ever been in a relationship with a person who had sexuality much different than yours?
(For example you might have had the foot fetish and the other person might have been into BDSM)
How long did it last?
how much of a problem it turned out to be?
state your gender plesae

>>18446364
Nah, don't worry about it. This terminology can be kinda ambiguous.

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Input from either would be helpful, I suspect each will be able to help with different parts here

I'm very in love with a friend of mine. I've known her for three years, we work and study together about 50 hours a week, and we don't really have that much in common except for our career goals and general values. She has also been in a relationship with the same guy for three and a half years.
I don't know what to do. By circumstance I have to be around her very often, and it's not as if I can just ignore her outside of school - she's a fairly close friend.
I'm in good shape, women often show interest in me and tell me I'm attractive, I'm very intelligent, and I'm set to enter a MD/PhD program. For some reason, I just can't get over this girl and I can't find anyone else that I have feeling for.

Femanons, is it at all realistic to expect her to leave her boyfriend? Would you? He's in pretty bad shape, he's very short, and he's unattractive (I know it sounds like I'm exaggerating or heavily biased, but multiple people have brought up their confusion about why she would be with him), but he also comes from a rich family while I'm currently pretty poor. Any additional advice from the female perspective?

Guys, have you been in any similar situations? Should I try to pursue her? Should I just try to ignore my feelings?

I feel really lost and confused about the whole situation and I'm not sure what to do. I'm not used to being so helpless.

>>18446403
>Have you ever been in a relationship with a person who had sexuality much different than yours?
Yes, I'm a sub, he's vanilla. He'd describe himself as a 'giver' from anon's definition here >>>18446347 . Probably so would I.
>How long did it last?
We've been together for a year
>how much of a problem it turned out to be?
We compromised. He chokes me and tosses me around and pushes me up against walls. But he's fairly gentle and I don't press him to go further than he's comfortable. I learned how to calm down about my insecurities over receiving pleasure, and I let him play with me. I ended up really really liking it. Our situation is pretty great.
>state your gender please
Female

>>18446431
>is it at all realistic to expect her to leave her boyfriend? Would you?
No and no. If he's as 'objectively worse' than you as you say he is and she's STILL with him over you, then what makes you think she'll ever leave him?

Also, according to you his only redeeming quality is his money. If she's a golddigger, then why do you want to be with her so much? Wouldn't that turn you off?

>Any additional advice from the female perspective?
Concentrate your energy elsewhere because this girl is taken.

>>18446431
>Femanons, is it at all realistic to expect her to leave her boyfriend? Would you?
It is not realistic to expect that and I would not leave my boyfriend.
The things you listed aren't really indicators for compatibility. Take a look at this post >>18445938

She has been with her boyfriend for a considerable amount of time. They're going to work out until they don't any more. If you try to sabotage her relationship, you'll sabotage her trust in you. Don't pursue her.

You're fucked. Either ignore your feelings or get a new job.

>>18446431
Forget about dating her if she has a boyfriend. Besides, you wouldn't want to date her if she was the type to ditch her boyfriend when she finds out another guy likes her. Spend less time with her so you can get over your feelings for her.

t. Unemployed microbiologist girl

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>>18446431
You're dumb, she's in a relationship already. Just fuck off and find someone else already. If she wanted to ditch him for you, she would have done so earlier. You just an emotional tampon nigga, step off

>>18446455
>t. Unemployed microbiologist girl

Hey, how's the micro field going for you? I've been wanting to get into biological research and might end up in micro. Any advice?

>>18446449
>Also, according to you his only redeeming quality is his money. If she's a golddigger, then why do you want to be with her so much? Wouldn't that turn you off?
I thought it was pretty clear that I don't want to have feelings for her at all. Obviously her staying with him for his money is a possibility, and from what I know of their relationship through our friendship it seems to be a likelihood, but the realization of this doesn't alter my feelings in any way.
>>18446454
>You're fucked. Either ignore your feelings or get a new job.
And how do I ignore my feelings?
>>18446455
>Spend less time with her so you can get over your feelings for her.
Like I said, this isn't an option. I would have to quit my part time job in a lab and also transfer universities
>>18446456
>Just fuck off and find someone else already
I specifically said in my post I'm unable to do that and I'm not sure how to proceed.
>You just an emotional tampon nigga, step off
I can confidently say I've prevented my self from becoming her emotional tampon. We're friends and I treat her as my equal, I may have very strong feelings for her but I don't put her on a pedestal

>>18446472
>Hey, how's the micro field going for you?
The unemployed part should give you a hint.

>>18445635
i've busted my nut in under 5 minutes and I've gone for hours without being close to finishing. when i would first start sleeping with a girl, I'd typically bust fairly quickly the first time, but the second time i'd be much more relaxed about it.
foreplay helps, getting 10-15 of a blowjob/handjob prior to sticking it in could help you match your partner's stamina so you both finish about the same time

>>18445635
You've asked this in the last 3 threads. Just stop already, you've got your answers.

>>18446472
Get an MD instead of PhD if you want to go into research and not end up competing for a minuscule number of jobs dependent on research funding. I had a few temp jobs in forensics and teaching here and there after finishing my honours. Don't really feel like starting a PhD right now (since I'm too broke) though I have it as one of my life goals.

>>18446511
You're lucky if you get a single good answer per thread, most of the people here barely read the posts and type out pure shit in response
You need to post a few times to get anything close to decent advice

>>18446524
Not that anon, but you haven't even asked for advice.

>>18446528
You're right, that was my first post in the thread, I'm just pointing out how terrible most of the people here are at giving advice

>>18446532
But you're not asking for advice so why do you care?

>>18446537
Are you on the spectrum?

>>18446544
Is that the only argument you can come up with?

>>18446550
Are you asking for advice?

>>18446558
No...?

>>18446564
Then why do you care?

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>>18446532
>bitches about people giving terrible advice
>responds with insults

>>18446518
Do you mean MD as in doctor of medicine, or MD as in Masters Degree? I'm admittedly not knowledgeable of what all the abbreviations mean. I'm still working on my associate of science, only planned as far as my bachelors in biology or molecular biology or microbiology or neurology.
I want to help contribute to humanity's expanding knowledge, but I don't necessarily need to be the hot shot in charge to do that. If it pays a livable wage and is for a company/group that is following my values, I'm willing to be chained to a bench and a micropipette full time. I do worry about having stable work if I'm dependent on research funding.

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Can I get more replies to this >>18445569 ?

>>18446566
About what?

>>18446574
About my caring while not asking for advice

>>18445569
Masculine men.

>>18446573
I didn't respond because I didn't think it was worth responding to. It's answered in the FAQ:

>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity or otherwise lack of dating experience>
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.

>>18445569
this question is fucking retarded

>>18446580
I don't care. I was just pointing out that you had no reason to complain that people here are bad at giving advice because you weren't even asking for advice. Were you dropped on your head as a baby or something?

>>18446585
>>18446589
Why? He is asking you.

>>18446591
You seem to care, I mean you have no reason to complain about people complaining without asking for advice when you yourself haven't done that either.
>Were you dropped on your head as a baby or something?
Is that the only argument you can come up with?

>>18445569
I prefer soft-spoken, clean, sensitive, intelligent, artistic men with somewhat slight physical features who don't feel pressured to act any more masculine or feminine than they are naturally. You can judge whether that kind of man is masculine, feminine, both, or neither.

>>18446596
firstly, because he suffers from a severe case of not reading the fucking sticky

secondly because it's pretty obvious that masculine traits are normal for men, so the majority of female population should like them, as deviants are a minority compared to the 'regulars'. Most basic statistics.

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>>18446612
Why are you so mad?

>>18446634
not mad at all.
just overtaken by a strong desire to show the dumb faggot his place.

>>18446403
bump, I'd like to learn much more

>>18446706
If you respond to the people who respond to your question, you get the double value of making your answerers feel valued and drawing attention to your question by starting a discussion.
What's your situation, anon?

Can girls here define what masculine is, in their eyes?

>>18446721
what?
I respond to any question I feel competent enough to do so.
I have no situation, I want to learn about people's sexuality

If girls became men, they would be manwhores.
If men became girls, they would be prostitutes.
Do you agree or disagree? State your gender.

I am a guy and I certainly would earn money by having sex if I could.

>>18445441
And yet none of them are asking questions for guys to answer

>>18446755
You're not a guy.

>>18446755
So you're saying that humanity is obsessed with sex?

I have a hard time making generalizations about other peoples' experiences. Personally, I don't think that my sex life would be all that different. Though there would me more pressure on me, if I was a guy, to perform. But I suppose it would be easier for me to cum, right? My desires would probably be a lot different, because my hormones would be different.

I hope you realize that if you were going to be a prostitute, you would be having sex with undesirable, old, overweight, crusty men, right?

>>18446769
I honestly try and think of questions for the guys every so often. I guess because I'm in here so often, any questions I've thought of to ask, I already have asked.

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Women:

Could you not makes plans then fall off the map the day of and ghost me, not even having the decency to tell me you're not gonna show? I know it's a problem with both sexes, but really. This is scummy. What goes through your head when you do this?

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Hey ladies,

I just started working a new job and i have a female co worker who during my first day asked a fuck ton of questions asking every little thing about me:

like if i was single, my story, what i was doing before, education, what i like doing etc.

Yesterday she poked, flirted and teased me a bit basically confirming what i thought on the first day which she might be interested in me.

From talking to her i'm not interested in a relationship she lives +100 minutes away from me (fuck long distance) among other reasons. But i think shes a good candidate for FWB, i've never asked somebody for that before and i'm not sure how to bring it up. How do i play this?

>>18446823
If she's that interested in who you are, I don't think it's right to do FWB. I think you should find someone who obviously wishes you well and finds you attractive, but isn't interested in anything serious like she seems to be. It's playing with her feelings and shit, even though you don't intend to. Don't do that.

Oh and Christ Almighty, don't shit where you eat.

>>18446755
Women are shitty at picking up women.

Women spend their whole lives being used to the man approaching them. If suddenly flipped, turned into a man and told to go hit on a woman other women would call them losers or creeps.

Women why you will try to still be friends with someone you just rejected?

Like i just feel so much selfish vives from women that do this they try to keep what they want from the person without giving the other person what they wanted

How in the fuck it makes sense in womens brain to even think that you can still be friends with the guy you just rejected.

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Girls:
Interested in a girl, but want to get to know more about her before I worry about dating. Been friends for awhile, we go to a board/video games club together and are in a DnD session.

What sort of questions should I ask her? More appropriately, questions I can ask on the drive home as we are 5 minutes apart from each other.

>>18446842
Because just because I don't want to date you, doesn't mean that I don't want to be your friend. If YOU don't want to be our friend, then it's up to YOU to extract yourself from the situation.

>>18446844
If you can't even think of questions to talk to her about, how do you expect to date her?

>>18446846
Heres the thing any normal dude will get the rejection and move on

BUT HOW THE FUCK do you expect any dude to move on if that girl that they like is still getting in contact with you trying to be you friend

On top of the cuck feeling that you gonna become her paper towel for the tears at any time she have issues AND girls are amazing to get into issues

Is just cancer for the men to deal with this shit and it puts the men in a shitty spot where they have to be literal assholes more than it needs to be to cut contact with the girl

How do you deal with regret?

>>18446879
this

How the fuck are you supposed to find girls that are trying to find YOU because you're their type?

>>18446879
nigga, have mercy
if you don't want to be friends with her, you just want to have her as a fuck toy. This proves she was right when she didn't wanted to form any closer relationship.

(I'm a guy btw)

>>18446879
>>18446881
If you don't want to be a friend, just fucking say so. "Hey, so it's hard for me to be just a friend right now, I need time to process things" isn't hard to say and any reasonable person would understand. No one's saying that you should just disappear.

You're an adult, start taking responsibility for your feelings and stop blaming women for feeling shitty about things

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>>18446890
>if you don't want to be friends with her, you just want to have her as a fuck toy

>staying with someone who wont reciprocate feelings
>wow if u leave u just wanted a fucktoy ;^)

>>18446911
>wont reciprocate feelings
wut?
she wants to be friends
so she will reciprocrate all the feelings of a friend

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>>18446920
ok dude.

>>18446920
I think you're the one that treats everyone as a fucktoy, since the only two states of relationship you have with someone are "friendship" and "friendship but with sex."

>>18446925
>the only two states of relationship you have
who told you so?
we are discussing becoming friends after rejection
not becoming collegues or fwb's or anything else but friends. Thus that's the only two states I'm concerned about right now

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>>18446851
>>18446851
>>18446851
That's the problem. I'm not good at thinking up or asking deep questions and can only ask about superficial things like hobbies or how their day has been.

What I want to do is see if there is an actual proverbial mask behind the friend that I am talking to. Asking someone what the meaning of life to them is out of the blue seems pretty awkward to me and will probably get a shallow answer.

>>18446933
But you just said that if he didn't want to be friends, he wanted a fucktoy.

That literally makes no fucking sense. He just wanted mutual feelings but that didn't happen. Why the fuck should anyone in that situation (male or female) make themselves suffer emotionally by hanging around someone who doesn't feel the same? The only reason to stay is if you can get over it instantly (unlikely), or you don't want to hurt the persons feelings. Either way, the friendship is different now.

>>18446942
well, maybe I'm strange or retarded or sth, but if I love somebody I just want them to be happy. If their idea of happiness doesn't involve me I'm not dancing and singing from happiness, but I accept their decision. And since I love them, I, just like before, enjoy their company and friendship

Guys or girls, but preferably girls:
>be with gf for 2 years
>she had rough childhood
>dad beat her 6th-10th grade
>finally went to jail for attempted murder and rape on the mom
>loss of dad meant going into poverty
>boys at school almost rape her at first party she goes to
>mom beat her throughout high school, but not the siblings because she reminded her of the dad
>meet years later when we're both 21
>23 now she says she has to breakup with me
>says she never thought shed experience true love and in our 2 years together she cares a lot for me but doesnt love me
>also needs time alone to be single and find herself
>feelsbadman but I have a couple female friends that broke up with their boyfriends for similar reasons, doesnt seem too uncommon
>in the month after we casually have sex and go on a road trip together
>while we're hanging out one day she gets tearful and says shes learned she really does have a true passionate love for me
>through all the abuse shes gone through growing up shes learned to love someone and its me
>so happy
>says she has something to tell me though
>uh oh
>in the month we've been single shes had a ton of sex with one guy, even sleeping over at his house for a weekend
>also went to third with a random dude on tinder
>call her a fucking slut, a liar (she had previously said things like this werent going on) tell her she's an abyssmal human being
>remember one time she said bullies in 7th grade would ask if anyone loves her not knowing of her family situation, and that it hurt because at the time she felt no one did
>tell her I don't love her anymore and that shes not someone who deserves love, just to get under her skin
>shes crying like crazy, I punch the glove compartment of my car and she recoils and hyperventilates like nuts because she thought I was gonna hit her and had flashbacks of her dad

Apologized for the punching thing. We've cooled down and honestly ive wanted to get back together for so long, but now...I just feel so cucked.

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>>18446954
Jesus Christ, you sound like you've been in that position all your life. Just get out bro, you can do it. You can find someone else... She doesn't like you dude

>>18446967
Don't take her back. She's a dumb whore. She only loves you now AFTER she did all that shit? Fuck no dude. Get someone better with less issues. For your own sake.

Please man. Show some fucking self respect. DO NOT TAKE HER BACK.

>>18446970
wtf?
I moved on a couple of times, had a couple of girlfriends, never stopped wishing well to those whom I started loving once upon a time

I've no problems, dude.
And yes, she likes me a lot. I'm just not a right person to be her man

Guys:

There's this sorta shy guy I'm interested in at work. I got his # from one of his friends and started texting him, pretending to be his boss firing him. He found out it was me of course.

Is that creepie? I kinda get the feeling he wouldn't have asked me for my # otherwise.

>>18447011
>Is that creepie?
just stupid

>>18447011
as long as you aren't overweight or ugly it's never creepy, just talk to him in person. But also, don't shit where you eat.

>>18447011
It's creepy in a sense that it's stupid and immature and not cute.

i smoke alot of weed but it genuinely doesnt take away from my personality and shit . But is it considerd a turn off to most girls.

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What's a good way to meet girls when you work a full time job that doesn't have any women, and all of your hobbies are pretty invidualistic or only involve a couple of friends?

Inb4 internet dating. I've tried it the past few months and it's been one giant long disappointment of girls constantly flaking.

>>18447018

I def don't fit those categories. What if I really want him though? Is there an exception to the rule of not shitting where i eat?

>>18447022

shit, thats not how I wanted it to appear. I genuinely thought it would be ok. any advice on how to proceed?

Have you ever fallen in love with a woman quickly (knowing her for less than a month) ? If so what was it about her that made you feel this way?

>>18447011
If he confronts you about it, tell him the truth even if you did something stupid by telling the truth that stupid thing makes sense

"im into you and i wanted to talk to you in some way but because i'm female im not experienced on doing the first move" or some shit like that play dumb


If never tells you anything BUT you know that he knows one day go and apologize and tell him the truth


The only part where you can be truly fucked is if he report you to the actuall boss of the work place...

Small Friend/ coworker for years broke up with her bf recently.

I've been working with her a lot, she doesn't really seem into me but I asked her to go to a restaurant with me tomorrow and she said yes. Even agreed to drink with me.

Im not sure if she sees this as just a friendship thing or what but how do I make my possibilities better? I was thinking of offering to go play N64 at her place with some beer and talk during dinner. I am friends with her brother so this has happened before.

Like I'm really in a moment where I know she sees us as friends but I want to increase my chances with her without destroying anything we might have friendship wise etc.

>>18447100
Sex appeal of course probably have specific things that i like alot (like long hair, tall etc.)

After that then you realize shes not retarded that gives bonus points to me for any female i encounter

>>18447063
Lift then do dating and compliment random.

>>18447117
Already lift for fun- currently bulking at 188lbs and 17%bf.

>dating and compliment random
What? Seriously, I could use an explanation.

>>18447144
Online dating showcasing your gains. Girls online only care about looks.

And literally go up to random girls and make bullshit conversation anywhere. If you're a pussy like me get drunk and do it

>>18447147
Online dating has been a bust, and I suck at talking to girls in bars- not to mention my usual places are neighborhood bars where people go to just hang out.

What I'm looking for is a somewhere that I can actually just regularly interact with women and go from there. Seriously if it wasn't for my favorite bar having girl bartender I could easily drink go all week without talking to a girl.

I also cook for fun, but my kitchen is a terrible place to meet women.

In 8th grade I had a female classmate in my English Class. And soon I realized that just about every time I walked past her (and her friends) during lunch break, she would say hi. She always said hi to me specifically whenever we happened to see each other at school and every time she said hi she would smile at me and tilt her head sideways a bit.

She always said hi to me specifically, and would only occasionally say hi to one or two of my friends. I never saw her act that way to other people, although I wouldn't know as I did not pay much attention to her at first. In fact, before she started saying hello to me, I was unaware of her existence and was did not notice that she was in my english class. For the first few times she said hello, she would say something like "hi XXXXX, We're in the same English Class" to remind me.

During Graduation (if you can call it that) I wore a suit and tie and when I got out of my car, I noticed her at the sidewalk and she complimented my looks. If I remember correctly, she said I looked cute (and then I just turned red looked at my leather shoes and mumbled something like an idiot). We went to different high schools so that was the last time I saw her.

I wanted to ask her a few times about what I had done to deserve her attention (she was a tall attractive white girl and I was and still am a chinese guy who walks around at lunch discussing history and geopolitics with a group consisting of another chinese guy, a jew, and a japanese guy), yet I couldn't bring myself to as she was always with her friends except at the graduation. I also wasn't interested in her at first, despite her attractiveness, although, if she was trying to get my attention she did succeed eventually.

To this day, I still have no idea why she acted that way. Does she just sound like a nice person who remembers the name of everyone in her classes and says hi to them every time they walk past? Did she like me? And if so did I miss out on a huge opportunity?

I like this girl who swears she likes me, and we always have a good time whenever we're actually together, but she's constantly flaking out on me. I like her and I want to be there for her, but I don't know if this is gonna be good for my self-esteem in the long run.

What do I do?

I don't think I love anybody, even my current partner. We have good times and may care for one another, but I don't think I feel that actual feeling of love. If I do, it's fleeting. I hate myself for it, and rightly so. I mislead them for the selfish reason of wanting to be with someone. Then I lie, to not hurt them, and to reciprocate what they express towards me. It is wrong. It makes us happy then, but that's stupid. It's going to hurt later. I will break up with him, that's the only choice. I will wait until he's a bit more stable, with a job to hopefully act as a cushion within a month. And afterwards? I think I should swear off men for at least a year. To find myself, or whatever, and avoid doing what I've done. It'll be lonely though. I have literally 0 friends besides my partner. This loneliness is the cause. I will have to work on it, though I don't really know how.

>>18447218
I was just like you. You sound really fuckin depressed(when was the last time you felt happy about anything, or even the last time you didn't feel empty?)
and he's probably not the right man for you either. Yes, break up with him, it's not fair to him for you to be running through the motions. Take time off from men. And one day someone will walk in and BoOm you feel things again. Happened to me. Gl

Autismo here.
I got on a train last night and sat across from someone, and an hour later I got off with her phone number.
I never did anything like this before and I'm not sure how it happened. What the fuck do I do now?

>>18447218
You have to love yourself before you can properly love other people

>gf gets insecure and angry that I'm in a videogame discord with ""Dangerous people"" who don't know a damned thing about me
>interrogates me about all the girls in there (most are dudes with anime avatars, girl character names, but when they're on voice they're just dudes) and whether I was talking to them
>apologize to and say bye to them, quit
>later find out she's in a discord where everyone knows she's a girl, where she lives, what she studies, and half of her dating history
>she talks about her day there and stuff like finding guys cute / people her mom want to set her up with

Is this actually one of those situations where she was projecting and she's the one (emotionally, or more) cheating? Or is it normal to do this kind of thing.

>>18447321
Do you really need to ask? If she was projecting any harder she'd be able to open her own cinema.

>>18447327
But there's no evidence of infidelity is the thing. She writes explicitly that she's turning down all of the dates her mom tries to set up... but what makes me worry is that there are a few @her's that seem to be responding to deleted messages...

And a few beta orbiters.

>>18447339
It's evidence enough that she's getting overtly jealous and angry over your innocent chats while doing the exact same thing and worse. Also wtf why is her mother trying to set up dates if she's your girlfriend?

>>18447321
>>18447339
nigga she's obviously cheating on you

>>18447347
>Also wtf why is her mother trying to set up dates if she's your girlfriend?

I'm not the same ethnicity as her / her mom is a gold digger and these guys are rich (apparently?)

>>18447350
Feels bad, man.

>>18447352
The mother not liking you at all plus what she's doing kind of already says this won't work out anon. I'm sorry.

Girls, I'm 19 and I'm starting to get a decent amount of Grey hairs. I can imagine by the end of the year it will be very noticeable.

So my question is, would you find this unattractive because I'm so young? It's a genetic thing from my grandfather that skipped my mom. By the time my Grandpa was 20 his hair was completely Grey. I honestly believe I'm going to be the same.

You'll be like Patrick Stewart!
I'm sure someone finds that attractive.

>>18445270
I am skinny since I never exercise. I am 6'2'' but I look thin. How unattractive does this make me?

>>18445270
hey fem anons, assuming you've gotten off with a partner before, how exactly did they get you off? I need almost a step by step, assume i will use what i learn here one week from now to please a woman.
All the details anything you can recollect that wowed you like pressure on a specific spot or something, what position is your favorite and where should i really dig into? I know not everyone is the same i'm asking for what you specifically like.
I just want to keep things moving without really needing any help from her to get her off. Take her for a ride kinda thing.

>>18447546
Perfectly attractive. I like skinny and tall guys.

I'm a guy with gynecomastia. Is it possible to exploit today's gender politics to get my mantits removed without having to pay a premium for 'cosmetic' surgery?

To end it once and for all:

Do girls really dont like to be treated like shit?

Do girls really dont enjoy rape?

Do girls dont act all bitchty just to wait for an alpha male to put them in their place?

Do girls like or not a bad person?

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Ladies and relevant people.

Been using the same dating site for at least 6 years now and haven't really gotten anything meaningful out of it.
I've dabbled into other ones but don't stay on them long.

Any suggestions on which ones are good from people who have used them frequently or have had success with them?

>>18447602
>Do girls really dont like to be treated like shit?
I don't like being treated like shit. I like banter tho, and mean jokes.

>Do girls really dont enjoy rape?
The thought alone is terrifying.

>Do girls dont act all bitchy just to wait for an alpha male to put them in their place?
Yes and no. I like when someone doesn't put up with my bullshit and knows how to establish healthy boundaries if I am being a bitch about something serious. But honestly most of my bitchiness is for shits and giggles, and if he needs to act all alpha over that he's ridiculous.

>Do girls like or not a bad person?
No, I don't like bad people.

>>18447565
fem anons pls

>>18447602
nobody likes being treated like shit. However a bit of bullying is a ok

rape is bad

shit tests are real, you can get her to stop,

girls like the right mix of alpha and beta for a LTR, just see it like you gotta appeal to her bad side and her good side to keep the whole her.

>>18446885
bump

>>18446885
Meet a lot of people till you click with someone.

>>18447616
Your luck on dating sites is entirely based on attractiveness. You're competing in an online meat catalogue.

>>18447565
He fucked me like he needed me. He was rough, passionate. I could feel he wanted me and he desired my body. He dirty talked quite a bit through it.
We kissed/made out a lot. He felt me up a lot while we were kissing. I was wet before even taking my clothes off.
He spent time on foreplay. He kissed my neck, ears, lips, breasts, stomach, thighs.
He gave me amazing oral sex - for me it is really just going for the clit, not pressuring too much and moving your tongue up and down/side to side. I come in a minute if I am very wet already.
I gave him head. He played with my hair and complimented me all the time.
When we were having sex, we started in the missionary till I came again. Pay attention to the angle you enter her and keep a steady rhythm.
Then he basically threw me over and I fucked myself on his dick in doggy till he came.

>>18447635
How am I supposed to do that when I'm not really extroverted and don't like meeting people all that much?

>>18447616
Maybe try a paid one, they weed out the people who aren't really serious by the paywall. Guardian soulmates?

>>18447602
If I say no, of course women don't want to be insulted, slapped around and raped I'll just get
>women don't know what they want

>>18447585
In the uk you can get them sorted on the NHS

>>18447655
Online dating, through your daily activities (school/work), or just suck it up and try to be more social.
You can't find your soulmate just sitting around alone in your room, it seems pretty intuitive.

>>18447489
Nah silver foxes are qt! Plus premature grey means less likely to go prematurely bald.

I'm pretty grey myself, at the moment I cover the greys cos the patchiness isn't hot, but I'm looking forward to the day I can be a young grey goddess.

>>18445591

I' m in the same boat as you bro. Met a girl a few days ago, and now i gotta escalate and whatnot. I feel that nervousness too, but i noticed that when i talk to her anyway. It disappears almost instantly. Try it. At worst you'll be friends. It's nothing personal if she rejects you.

>>18447602
>treated like shit
Depends on how you treat them like shit. You probably shouldn't go up to a girl and straight up pour your drink on them, but girls will stay with abusers (actual abusers, not just open-handed slaps once every month) if the dude is attractive enough.

>do girls not enjoy rape
Some do, some don't, but all of them don't like having their sexual agency taken from them.

>do all girls act bitchy
It's called a shit test, but some girls are just that basic

>Do girls like or not a bad person
Is this even English? Girls like bad guys because bad guys generally have a tendency to evoke strength and disregard for other's (especially society, which prefers you aren't a steroid monkey) rules. You aren't going to wet any panties for embezzlement.

>>18447668
Well online dating is terrible, and I'm never going to feel natural at a bar or party, so I guess my best bet is clubs.

>>18447672
>girls will stay with abusers (actual abusers, not just open-handed slaps once every month) if the dude is attractive enough.
People who stay with abusers have mental issues. It's not a matter of attractiveness.

>>18447676
9/10 times that illness is "yeah he beats me/yeah she's ruining my life but I'm never going to get a chance with anyone this attractive ever again."

>>18447653
Thanks fem anon, about what i'd expected, fuck i just need to get out there.

>>18447679
That is simply bullshit.
People stay in abusive relationships because they are scared of leaving, because they don't know any better, because they are terrified of being alone, because they rely on their abusive partner... attractiveness is almost never the point.

>>18447679
No it's fucking not. It's 'he's gaslighted me and emotionally manipulated me into having no self worth and thinking I cannot function without him'

>>18447675
Online dating can be pretty decent. Try meeting people through your friends or through your interests.

>>18447602
>Do girls really dont like to be treated like shit?
I don't like to be treated like shit.
>Do girls really dont enjoy rape?
I certainly wouldn't. It's damaging.
>Do girls dont act all bitchty just to wait for an alpha male to put them in their place?
I don't. I'm not bitchy and I don't want an "alpha male".
>Do girls like or not a bad person?
I don't.

As a final note, please don't use these double negatives. It's just sloppy.

Both genders (please state) if you were trying to have a baby and then found out one of you and your spouse was infertile, would you find it more embarrassing if it were the man or the woman; you or your partner?

>>18447794
Female.
Neither would be embarrassing, it would just make me immensely sad that I couldn't have his babies.

>>18447794
Male
I wouldn't find it embarrassing, I'd only find it sad.

>>18447692
Not unless you're physically attractive. Plus I need to find girls that are at least somewhat tolerant of a beta personality. I don't want to wait until I'm 35 to date a 29 year old woman with 20 past sexual partners as my first girlfriend.

>>18447248

You did something you would never normally do and it worked. Keep going.

>>18447857
I went out on a date with 3 guys off online dating. Two were probably 4.5/10, the other was a 6.5/10.
It's really not so hard to meet people online even if you don't look amazing.

Also - stop talking like a robot.

>>18447248
>Autismo here
Could you elaborate on how you managed to get her number

>>18447874
What's "not talking like a robot?" Because when I type online I'm only really interested in getting my point across. In real life when I'm with my friends I just end up saying 'like' and 'fucking' a lot.

>>18447895
Like Fucking same my dude bro dude!

>>18447904
See, this is why I don't like that online.

>>18447908
Do you prefer saying like or fuck?

>>18447914
Not really, I kind of wish I could get rid of my 'valley girl' likes and save 'fuck' for when I actually mean it.

>>18447895
>I need to find girls that are at least somewhat tolerant of a beta personality. I don't want to wait until I'm 35 to date a 29 year old woman with 20 past sexual partners as my first girlfriend.
Don't say shit like this. Don't even think shit like this.
You talk like you're straight out of r9k and it is annoying.

>>18447930
Not him but isn't the first sentence a somewhat legitimate concern?

>>18447933
I'm 18 and fucked a girl a classmate with some 20 past sexual partners, a good majority of them being older men... Was that bad especially since she would always compliment me on how well I could duck her compared to the other guys, but that might just be more of a fetish thing on my part...

>>18447959
Wasnt*

>>18447959
I was talking about the first sentence.
But anyway, most girls haven't had 20 previous partners. The girl you fucked sounds like a slut but she's an outlier I think

is it normal to feel guilty after accidentally glancing at other people? Those people have their own lives, social circles, etc and not having the discipline to avoid looking at them feels like I am infringing somehow.

>>18447965
She was she even admitted to having a sex addiction or more specifically an intense need for human comforting of any form. I thought guys where turned on by sluts I guess it's just me...

Dear mod, fuck you!
>to that anon who is neet and complains no girl want to date neets

>>18447859
Your view on world is warped. You probably visit /pol too often, not knowing that everything there is satire.

It works like this anon:
1. People go to work because that is what their parents did, what society expects them to do, because they want to, because they want money in order to buy things.

Nobody goes to work in order to get gf. Later when you marry and have kids, you have another reason to go to work. To provide for them and give them example on how to be respobsible adult: to go to work and be independent.

2. You are true about girls not liking neets. But that is because it shows you are still behaving like child. And even then, we sometimes have thread about femanon with not working bf who does nothibg whole day (not even clean ir take care of kids), asking us how to whip him into doing ANYTHING, because living life for two people is hard.

So my shit advice for you is:
Stop being neet, go make your own money, shower, dress nicely, have a haircut, shave your beard, put your fedora and katana away and go outside more.

Once your life will be repaired, girls will consider dating you much more easier.

>leave r9k and pol forever, it is SATIRE!

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>>18447969
You have to look at something... Unless you close your eyes but that's also weird. Just look at everything equally.

>>18447973
I'm a monogamous man and I expect some degree of monogamy back. That kind of lifestyle you described is for some men. Not for me.

>>18447933
World isn't divided in "alpha" and "beta". Beta personality doesn't mean anything.

>>18447982
Beta: most likely introverted, shy, not very assertive, lacks confidence, likely to have issues with self-esteem or insecurities

>>18447980
But don't you like the feel of dominance! You have obtained this fucktoy and your making her squirm you have surpassed what fucked that hole before a true alpha, I don't mean Do it then let her go I mean it's only hot it she comes back for more. Otherwise you just fucked a pig and it means your duck wasn't good enough.

>>18447987
Again, doesn't mean anything. It is way too simplistic.

What is my boyfriend? He's very introverted, pretty assertive, awkward as fuck and shy when he just met someone, has low self esteem but he just goes for self-deprecating humour to play it off. He always had girlfriends and has a nice social life.
Is he a "beta"?

>>18447987
Being beta just means you don't take or work at what you want and you let others walk over you, none of those characteristics mean they are beta. I have all of them but I still won't let a girl cuck me and I'm usually the first one to make a move in my relationships...

>>18447997
>He always had girlfriends
>Is he a "beta"
Unlikely

>>18447997
By that definition, yes. But you're probably exaggerating for effect. Either that or he's EXCEPTIONALLY attractive.

>>18448000
Being beta means you put others before yourself which is what made society work for so long before hedonism and solipsism took hold.

>>18447997
>self-deprecating humour
I thought that was generally considered unattractive. How do I do it without sounding like a loser?

https://archive.4plebs.org/adv/thread/18447678

>>18447964
>suck my husband's dick every night.

If that's true and you don't act like a de-feminized bitch because of your job, then good, but you're a very rare exception.

>>18447968
I'm guessing you're a female in college, or currently working. Are you upset to realize that men don't want a working woman?

Did you mistakenly believe that the same thing makes men high-value will make you high-value?

The more career-oriented a woman is the LESS value she has to men.

An 18 year unemployed virgin male is unwanted. An 18 year old unemployed virgin female is gold to men. A 30 year old man with financial stability is gold to women. A 30 year old career-woman (especially with feminist beliefs) is garbage to men.

>>18448012
>18 year unemployed virgin male is unwanted.
50% of men lose their virginity after the age of 17.
And most 18 year olds don't have careers yet.

>>18448001
Yet he fits most of the "beta" description.

>>18448004
>But you're probably exaggerating for effect.
Lol, no. I'm not. He's a bit of a sperg, but in a cute way. People love him. He's very genuine.

He's good looking but not a 10/10. He's a good guy.

>>18448006
>How do I do it without sounding like a loser?
Just be funny, really. Don't do it constantly and don't be too hard on yourself, but self-deprecating humour can be nice.

>>18448012
>An 18 year old unemployed virgin female is gold to men.
Then they complain about alimony.

Men really never learn.

>>18448014
>50% of men lose their virginity after the age of 17.

Yeah exactly, once they gain financial status to compensate for being an ugly beta, and THEN females who never wanted to fuck them before suddenly want to fuck them.

I should have said NEET, not just unemployed. The point still stands.

For long-term relationships women are primarily attracted to financial status, and men are primarily attracted to looks, youth, sex, number of past sexual partners, and non-feminist attitudes.

>>18448031
An old hag with a career is just as likely to ruin his life with a divorce, if not more likely.

That's why no men want to get married or have children with women anymore.

Extremely high risk of getting their life ruined in a divorce. Having their kids stolen and financially destroying them.

>>18448038
>men are primarily attracted to looks, youth, sex, number of past sexual partners, and non-feminist attitudes.
Maybe wannabe school shooters from /r9k/.

>>18448027
>He's good looking
If a less attractive guy behaved like a sperg it probably wouldn't be considered cute is what I'm saying.

>>18448048
Marrying a woman who makes roughly as much as you lowers immensely the chances of divorce, and also means that you won't have to pay alimony and be "financially destroyed".

Is having good cooking skills an atractive trait for a guy?

>>18448053
I mean, I suck his dick - I obviously think he's cute. He's not a model. He's a 6/10 probably.

>>18448049
No this is true for all the femanons and antisocial males out there men do take these things into consideration, and above all he is making a generalisation so there will of course be outlires.

>>18448057
Yes that's why I learned how to cook...

>>18448049
So when girls come on and say they're primarily attracted to good-looking guys who are confident and make a lot of money they're also school shooters?

>>18448057
>>18448066

No, being able to cook is a basic life skill and I'd expect any adult to be able to do it. Being impressed that someone can cook is like being impressed that someone knows how to get dressed.

>>18448068
When people get in long term relationship they care about being attracted to each other, wanting similar things out of life and being compatible on a personality level.
Both men and women care about this.

Thinking that men like only 18 year old virgin waifus is retarded.

>>18448049
No I'm describing all men. You're in denial, you're coping. That is what men value in women. They don't give a fuck about how much money you make, even though for women that is incredibly important in their attraction to men.

>>18448056
>Marrying a woman who makes roughly as much as you lowers immensely the chances of divorce

It doesn't, she's still over 50% likely to divorce, and will most likely still get custody of the children and drain him of money in the divorce.

If you're a financially successful guy, have all the money you need, which do you want?:

- Career-woman: Poisoned by college/feminist indoctrination, spends large amounts of time at work, is stressed because of work, has no femininity, acts like a man, doesn't cook/clean, isn't available for sex, is a bitch

- Bubbly feminine housewife that has lots of sex whenever you want and cooks and cleans his house

Financially stable males want unemployed housewives.

Financially stable women don't want unemployed househusbands.

>>18448071
>basic life skill
I am not sure what will you do once you find out how girls arent able to do all these basic life skills anymore.

>>18448079
>They don't give a fuck about how much money you make, even though for women that is incredibly important in their attraction to men.
It really isn't. Women don't want to provide for someone for all their life, and it's reasonable. Richer =/= hotter.

You're also pretending that there is no in between - as I said, I have a full time job, come home, cook my husband dinner and then have sex with him. I'm not a raging feminist, I am extremely feminine in my looks and definitely do not act like a man, I cook like a goddess and am not a bitch.
Plenty of financially successful men want equally successful wives.

>>18448078
>Thinking that men like only 18 year old virgin waifus is retarded.

I don't say "only".

To the contrary, female hypergamy is completely out of control, even ugly/fat/stupid women have tons of guys competing for them.

Unfortunate for them it is low-status males that they don't want. Financially stable reasonably attractive men have their pick.

Guess what they pick? It's not the 30+ year old career woman. It's the girl in her early 20s that wants to be a housewife/mother, who didn't sleep around or party, and doesn't have feminist beliefs.

>>18448088
>Women don't want to provide for someone for all their life, and it's reasonable

Unlike men, who want housewives. Successful men actually WANT their girlfriend/wife to be unemployed.

Women are all literal prostitutes, they would never date a NEET.

>>18448095
The only people I know who are complaining about how hard it is to find a SO are on this site and tumblr.
Really, you're just undesirable. Plenty of people have partners. Don't blame it on society.

>>18448104
Because those are the traditional male/female stereotypes. A lot of men wouldn't be okay with being househusband for the same reason.
Manliness means being driven and ambitious, being the provider, etc. You're not manly if you are a NEET and happy with it, it makes you less attractive.

>>18448083
What?

>>18448108
>You're not manly if you are a NEET and happy with it

Hol up, you can say that I'm undesirable to females, but being a NEET doesn't necessarily mean anything about masculinity.

I am more muscular than 99% of men, and could beat 99% of men in a fight, I am extremely masculine, but I'm a NEET.

>>18448071
It is it really is, why do you think they made a just girly things thing out of it, because it's attractive to girls...

>>18448104
Are you possibly anon from that deleted thread? This message is for you then >>18447977

>>18448115
Well, how do you see person who cant cook for shit nor wants to do it or learn it?

>>18448120
We mean in a fistfight no katanas allowed...

>>18448120
No, dude. You're definitely not masculine if you are a NEET and you are happy with your status.
Masculine men are independent, fierce, driven, confident, responsible, stable. A masculine men is a provider for his family, he is the foundation of his family, he's the one everyone relies on.
If you are a NEET and happy with it, you're not masculine and undesirable for most women, since they want a masculine men. Even if you are muscular.

>>18448127
>Nobody goes to work in order to get gf.
Yes they do I'm not even kidding. There is men that only work because they wouldn't get access to females otherwise.

If I got a job, the ONLY reason would be to get a girlfriend, I have no other reason to work for the rest of my life.

>go outside more.
I go outside sometimes, I walk around aimlessly, doesn't do anything.

>Once your life will be repaired
My life is already perfectly fine and I'm happy, with one exception, no girl wants me because I'm a NEET.

>>leave r9k and pol forever, it is SATIRE!
You don't even understand what satire is. If you actually understand what satire is, and think the people on /r9k/ and /pol/ are just being satirical, then that's even dumber.

>>18448131
A fucking female trying to tell me what masculinity is?

Listening to a female's idea of masculinity would be the least masculine thing a guy could do.

File: 1495367742290.jpg (61KB, 600x800px) Image search: [Google]

61KB, 600x800px

>>18445270
Girl here.

I'm pretty introverted, I just like lifting weights and learning languages, and programming. I hate alcohol and going to bars or pubs. This means I'm always an outcast (I work as a web dev and all my colleagues are outgoing or drink). People make fun of me for not liking alcohol/junk food. I just want to do my own thing and be happy but people make me feel like I'm a complete weirdo. I feel like I'll never find a guy who is like me or will accept me. Is there anyone like me? How do I find guys like this?

>>18448154
There's one right here
Please be in Paris

>>18448153
>A fucking female trying to tell me what masculinity is?
God, you are REALLY pathetic.

>>18448154
I am like you (even same job), just guy version who doesnt allow others to laught at him as easily as you.

>meet me in random online dating website / app
Good luck!