I can't get over my ex

would it make you feel better if they broke up? if so what do you think that means?

>>18442915
Yes. I'm positive it would. I went through a similar (but not nearly as bad or long) situation with another guy and immediately felt better when he and the girl he left me for broke up. In that case, I just let go of my anger immediately, but I wasn't depressed all the time like I am now.

I feel like it would be a giant weight lifting off me in this case. I'm not sure if its:

1) Just me being egotistical and selfish and wanting to be better, or at least not worse, than the other girl

2) Me still having feelings for him and hoping for reconciliation or at least being able to be friends (we tried and it doesn't work...I'm too bent out of shape over what happened)

or something else entirely.

I don't know. I hate that they're together but I don't want to do anything to break them up either, even if there was anything I could do. I just want them to break up.

>>18442885

These are all pretty classic signs of extreme dependence on one person. Yes, they were your boyfriend for a long time, but you were a person before you started dating him. Act like that person that used to be there.

Sounds like your unhappy that hes happy. Your relationship failed for a reason. If he never broke up he would be miserable and resentful of you anyway. (If he wasnt already)


Get off this site and go and seek help

>>18442885
Don't listen to these dumbasses. Your stupid ex ditched you for some slut, and you hate that those assholes are happy and you're not. That's called human fucking nature.

HOWEVER, it's been 3 years, and that shit's still running your life. Have you thought about moving back to where you came from? Or maybe somewhere else entirely? I'm not saying that making a life change will help, but you can't stay trapped by this.

I understand that you've been hurt repeatedly, so now you're traumatized. I've dated a string of selfish, insensitive bitches, so now I'm not sure if I'll ever trust a girl again. But you can't let pain from the past dictate your future. Give people a chance. All it will take is one person to break through.

>>18443090
He isn't happy. We spoke a few weeks ago and he was in a pretty awful place. She has chronic health problems, mental health issues (I do too, so that's not a judgment), and no money. But he doesn't seem willing to leave her so there's not really much I can do. I've told him to stop coming to me with his problems with her.

>>18443051
That's a good point and for the most part I do - I exercise, play instruments, learning to program, read, cook, etc.But I still cry myself to sleep most nights and every once in a while I break down for a few days and become a lump of nothing. I'm in one of those states now.

>>18443123
Moving is not really an option for me. He was talking about moving away with her, but he's been saying that for years now. I wish they would just go away.

>>18442885
Kill yourself.

>>18443462
considering it

It really seems like you just need to get over yourself.
You've already wasted 3 years of your life being jealous/torturing yourself over this and it's really not doing anything to help anyone.

It also sounds like you're still in contact with this guy, which is probably the biggest problem.

Stop talking to him, get rid of any reminders of him, and find a guy you're attracted to and can see yourself with long-term.

>>18442885

Ten years is a long, long fucking time. It will take a long time to get over it. Shit, I was in a relationship for only 2 years and it took me about 4 until I felt really okay with myself.

You need to focus on yourself. Always. All the time. Not him, not her, not them, but yourself. Focus on bettering yourself. When you feel like shit try anything to get your mind off it. Just do what you normally do. Even if you don't feel up to it, doing the tiniest thing can help.

>>18443522
>I was in a relationship for only 2 years and it took me about 4 until I felt really okay with myself.
Well, that's not fucking normal, sorry but I think you know that. Don't tell OP her case is okay, she needs to make changes from what she's currently doing.

>>18443541

Maybe not but that shit happens dude.

thats hard
im trying to get over someone since 2012