Relationship trouble - am I in the wrong?

She is probably hurt and lashing out.

Maybe disproportionately compared to what it is she's complaining about, but, it's coming from a place of feeling like you're not there for her, and maybe is something she has been feeling for a while and this was just the straw that broke everything. Plus there's the emotions of her uncle dying adding onto it.

My advice to you and anyone is that actions speak so much louder than words. It doesn't take anything to text someone "I'm there for you" or tell someone "I love you." It's what you do to actually show it that matters. What have you done to show it to her, OP?

Yeah, she is fucking another man.

I'm so sorry.

>>18437822
I've been there for her in literally every other instance. She didn't seem too upset at the time and I continuously checked to see how she was going. As I said, if I had my chances again I'd have gone to visit her without even offering.

>straw that broke everything
I think so, for the last 4 months she hasn't seemed quite as enthusiastic in texts etc. Not sure why, I treat her very well.

>>18437827
I hope not but why do you think this?

>>18437843
Well OP, honestly the only thing you can do is talk to her. Have a serious talk and make her spill the beans with whatever's going on with her and what made her start building up a mistrust or resentment or whatever it is towards you.

And if she does tell you, you really need to listen and take it to heart, even if you disagree with what she's saying. Rather than argue, ask questions and be empathetic. If she gets a sense that you are genuinely trying to understand her you will have a better chance of reconciling the problem.

And I think anon is saying she could be fucking someone else because some girls when they feel neglected just hop on to someone else who shows them the kind of attention they're needing. But we know pretty much nothing about your girl so you'll have to trust your gut on that one

>>18437852
I've tried to talk to her about it but I don't get much. I already apologized that I didn't visit. I stated that every single other time I've always been there for her to which she agreed on that point. I'm not really sure. She seems less enthusiastic for months so maybe she's just grown tired of me - I don't think much about me has changed or that I'm putting less effort into the relationship.

>And I think anon is saying she could be fucking someone else because some girls when they feel neglected just hop on to someone else who shows them the kind of attention they're needing. But we know pretty much nothing about your girl so you'll have to trust your gut on that one
I really don't think she is, I mean obviously anything is possible but I don't think so. I could see it maybe turning that way though unless things get fixed

bumping for more opinions

>>18437822
I was pretty upset with my ex after I had to put down my dog and all I got was "So sorry" in a text. The resentment over that definitely built up. Totally spot on with your last point.

>>18437843
>I hope not but why do you think this?
Because /adv/ is fucking obsessed with cheating and thinks any kind of out-of-the-ordinary behavior in a relationship can only have one cause. Girls are never just randomly bitchy; when your sweetie blows up at you, one hundred percent of the time it's because she's taking some other dude's dick up her vagina. Literally one hundred percent of the time.

>>18437822
this guy gets it, it's not about you or her beeing right, she just has one of those "check if my partner is still there for me" moments, where you say, you are with her and want to support her. period. no buts or if's. Also say sorry, that you didn't do what she wanted you to do, but didn't tell you back then.

most likely she will thank you with a sweet BJ in a few days to make it up to you

>>18438095
I did apologize and I do mean it. What worries me more is the 'drifting apart' thing - Im not sure where thats coming from given nothing has changed on my end. Also I worry maybe one of her friends is in her ear telling her this kind of stuff, why bring this up out of the blue 2 months later!?

>>18438121
Maybe she's comparing to her friends relationships.

Look at her friends too, how much you'd trust them. Also their relationships or past history. You know, birds of a feather flock together shit.

Friend could also be telling her shit. I know my last relationship turned cancerous when one of her friends started interfering with us. Eventually got too toxic and I called it off. She couldn't see it until after. Either way, the friend got her "friend" back

Sounds like she's being emotional with what's happening and things. Best to not take it into heart and be there for her without too much unnecessary words.
I don't know the exact, but from your posts, op, it seems like you've put too many words that was not balanced by your actions.

Also if I were you I'd check on her friends, I'll try to ask them what's been happening that I don't already know. There's a chance her friends will be covering up for something, but asking them should provide you with some insights if something happened with your relationship from outside's perspective.

Worst case is she's already began to see someone else, most likely her backup boyfriend since she made the 'drifting apart' comment and not giving you much when you tried talking things with her.
Of course at this point there's no harm in trying to find out via her friends or someone else close to her.

>>18438321
From what she's told me all her close friends are in shitty relationships with guys that cheat on them. As I said I've treated her very well so maybe they are jealous and trying to sabotage things? Nothing to base this on just throwing it out there though

>>18438540
Thank you for your advice anon. I'm annoyed I wasn't there for her but every other time I've always been there for her in person