Im here to listen.

Hello, so im at a point in my life where im just not happy, relationship wise. Im 21 years old, never had a real girlfriend, usually end up being friendzone, you know the usual story. Thing is ive had sex before but i couldnt finish because i never felt connected to the girl.... weird right?? ball deep and just went dead. Anyway im starting to think that ill end up alone and am currently having homicidal thought. any advice??

I broke my hymen

>>18429224
Quit being a pussy, and find a nice dude. It's obvious that you are gay. Don't be ashamed of it.

>>18429231
No i assure im not gay, ive only gotten off once with a girl i really liked but it was just a fling

>>18429224
I'm not the OP but I'm here to tell you that was exactly me at your age. By the time I was 25, I had so many failed dates and hookups by friends trying to get me dated I thought I was destined to be single forever. Then when I was 27 it finally happened. I met someone and began dating. 1 1/2 years later, we got married and as they say, the rest is history. You may wait a long time but don't give up. Trust me, I know how hard it is. I've been there.

>>18429235
was her pussy shaved or hairy also what ethnicity was she?

Hi, lately i been body shaming myself and contemplating suicidal thoughts. I weight 280lb and spend my whole day in my room. I have no more energy to live and I feel like the world would be better without me. I'm just a lonely fat pieces of shot who plays video games all day, has no friends, and jacksoff to anime. What I need is to change my life.hOw?

>>18429240
Stop trolling

>>18429224


I do have advice actually.

Sex and relationships are entwined, but not the same thing.
You're putting too much pressure on both by equating them.

Stop worrying about sex. It's something we as a species have done for millions of years. You are just another caveman in a long line of cavemen.

Stop being worried about performance.or judgement. Those are the reasons you had difficulty.

LOTS of people have difficulty the first few times with someone knew. Once you're comfortable it will be natural.

Sex seems to be the focus of relationships for you as well. And again. It gets muddled and adds all this pressure.

There's no such thing as the friendzone.

There's just a place where sometimes you're friends and so.etimes you're more. And lots of factors lead to which it is.

First tandem foremost. Just be yourself. Be authentic to yourself and true to who you are and what you want.

Be that person when you meet girls. And be clear with what you're looking form if you like them. Tell them. Ask them out.

Not everyone will say yes. That's OK. You won't say yes to everyone either.

Just be you. And there will be women who are thrilled with who that person is.

>>18429240
It was shaven and she was black. why?

>>18429229
That's fine. It's just a little messy. And a little painful once. It doesn't have any actual significance.

>>18429256
>>18429237
Thanks to the both of you, Op for the advice and anon fir giving me hope. I really needed. Who'd think 4chan of all places would be where i would find the answer to my problems.

>>18429258
Why would you even answer? Ughhhh

>>18429242
That is heavy my friend.
I know how real those thoughts can become. And how easy it seems to be a solution.

I hope you hang on.

My advice for you is simple.

Start fresh. In your own head first.
Start small. And forget the past. Forget the struggle. Forget the anxiety. And the fear. Let all of that him and decide for yourself... And only for yourself. Not to please anyone. Or because you think it's what you "should" be.

Decide.

What is it you want? What changes would you make. If you had a magic wand.

What is one thing that would make you a little happier tomorrow than you are today.

And then realize... There's is no wand.
But there IS desire. And desire can make amazing things happen.

Pick a thing. Anything. And start in the path to that.

Start with something small enough to see tangible goals over a shorter amount of time.

Do that.

Go for a walk for a half hour a day.
Or start drinking only water.
Or make peace with videogames making you happy, if they do, and stop shaming yourself for enjoying them.

Just choose. And start. And be proud of yourself.

Don't get down on yourself when you fail. Or when it doesn't change in a day. Just keep trying and reminding yourself of your progress. Even when it's small.

Then pick another when you're ready.
And another. Keep it manageable. Don't overwhelm yourself but just... Move forward.


I promise you in a year. Your entire life will be different.

>>18429265
The advice was given by op. And you're welcome! Best of luck sir.

>>18429265
Oh I see. Another helpful anon. Thank you for your story kind anon.

>>18429265
Oh I see. There was another kind and helpful anon. Thanks for sharing your story, friend.

I've try ed so many times to change but I always fail. I can't go thru this again, I'm afraid to fail again , I hate myself for failing, I can't live with myself again if I fail. I have no contribution to make to this world. I just every thing to end.

>>18429284
It sounds like you are putting so much pressure on yourself anon.
Focus on the fact that you are trying. Not the result. Failure is OK. It doesn't mean you aren't succeeding. It is important to consider what your end goal is. And if you are a little closer than you were before.

When you focus on EVERYTHING being awful... It's easy to miss all the amazing little things that are wonderful.

Start paying attention to them.
You may still be overweight.. but getting out for even a half an hour to walk is making a difference in things far beyond weight. The benefits compound. You're out of the house. In the world. Getting sunlight which helps mood. You're getting a little exercise. You're meeting people.

Make an activity of it. Volunteer at a rescue shelter. Go walk some dogs. That will change your life and theirs.

Every step is change. Every decision leads some place new.

I know the weight of the world feels like it is on your shoulders. But that is only overwhelming if you try to lift it all at once.

Focus on the little parts. They add up to big parts quickly. I promise.

>>18429242
REEEEEEEE YOU FUCKING BLACK BITCH

We gave you everything you needed to lose weight. I'll personally dick you if you go down to 140.

Ty for your advice. I'll start paying attention to the smaller things and will start making goals for myself ! TY! Really appreciated your advice.

>>18429325
You're more than welcome anon.

Don't give up. Save what I have told you and remind yourself of it later when You struggle. Don't forget that failure is OK. It's expected. Just try again.

I wish you well anon. If you see my Lucy threads again please come and say hello and let me know how you are.

I'm 27. Virgin. No friends. Graduated two years ago from a media school or whatever it is in english. Didn't learn anything. No hope of getting a job. I live off welfare. I'm unhappy. I dream of starting a Youtube series where I rant about conspiracy theories like some mad hermit to gain a small and silly audience. I don't have the balls to do it. I want all the niggers and muslims to get the fuck out, stay out of my country or kill themselves.

>>18429348

There is no question here, anon.

However I Do sense your unhappiness you spoke of.

So my advice would be to come Sider what it is that is making you so unhappy.
And what might help change some of those things for you.

Also. Consider your anger. And the ways and paths it is directed. Consider if those are things that require anger. Or if they are things you can simply let go of. Or if your REAL issues are causing anger at things that are not the root cause.

Seek out the roots. Both for growth, and for the things that need to be eradicated from your life. That is where the meaningful change can happen.

>>18429348
Also consider what it is that tis hiding you back from persuing your dream.

There is a reason you don't try. A reason you don't just.. start. Find that reason. And then you can overcome it. And just... Give it a try. I would watch that channel.

Others would too. Remember that.

I have a little time left if anyone is still in need of someone to talk to. As long as this stays on page one for.

>>18429218
Why am i fad? Why are "normies" trying to overrun my culture? Why? I thought i was a loser?

>>18429661
Labels are inherently misguided things.

We are much more than any label cluld capture.

However culturally speaking you can never predict what is going to catch on.

Since you havent identified what 'culture' you identify with, or what is being appropriated i cant comment more specifically.. however it could simply be because it is outside the norm enough that people who are seeking to be apart from the herd have latched on.

It could be because your culture is being integrated and spotlighted enough to have become much more "acceptable" and thus inherently more desirable.

Once anything reaches mainstream awareness it is at risk of being overrun by those who are interested. Or curious. Or trying to be ironic. Or a multitude of other reasons.

Althpigh i am sure it is frustrating to have 'imposters' the only thing you can really do is try to be as open and relaxed as possible. Trust that the others withon your circle see the interloopers as nothing more than tourists in your world. And be ok with just being eho younare.

You werent doing it for other people to begin with. And you arent going to stop doing it for people now.

Its just a part of who you are.

>>18429218
Im talking about the "geek/nerd" culture. Apparently we are cool now. Idk i wasnt cool when i was in school nor am i now. Dont get me wrong OP I welcome those genuinely interested. God i saw a post on reddit making fun of the roleplayers and saying they smelled really bad, i felt disgusted. I felt like i was children being raped in front of me. Why cant these people take the bad? Oh thats right, theyre posers. Fucking normie trash

I don't why am I always afraid to begin drawing and other stuff like getting fit. I always procrastinate, I already have high expectations for myself without even starting and it's making me angry.

I'm also in school doing some shit I don't enjoy (accounting) and I don't know if I should take a gap year. I'm just generally confused and anxious.

Well, since you're here to listen, and we're all anonymous...

I started to fall in love with this fictional character really hard again and now it seems like it's here to stay. I've fallen in love with her once when I was 10 but managed to move on of it. Now I'm 20 and feel like I won't get a chance in love anymore, even if I'm still too young to say that, and since this character is the responsible for giving me the patterns and looks I like from a chick the most I just have given up and I only want to live with and for her, as fantasize-ish as it sounds.

Is it really that bad? Or people only say that because they can't see themselves beyond their own noses and I'm just dealing with the most basic illness of all the catalog?

>>18429689
But so i guess what im saying is that you dont control peoples actions. Only your reaction to them.

If you arent interested in engaging tourists... you can safely leave them to their own devices.

You dont care what they think about other things anyway. So why are you letting yourself care about that?

Its not their opinion that is causing you unhappiness. Its your reaction to it.

Fuck em. Lifes too short. Be happy being you. Find people who match your world view and perspectives. Be happy with them. The other six billion people are irrelevant, friend.

>>18429699
You sound crazy and people are right to comment on that, my friend

>>18429692
If you read through some of my other advice in this thread i think you may find some things that help you.

However.

Its hard to start climbing a mountain when youre at the bottom staring all the way up at the top thinling to yourself that younarent even good enough to get there.
Hating yourself for not ALREADY being at the top.

Start small. Pick something. Focus on it. And just take one step at a time. Look down at your feet. Not up at the top.

Enjoy the journey. Thats whats important. And when you stumble. Dont give up. Peek down and remember that oure farther ahead than when younstsrted.

Failing is ok. Falling isnt the end of the world. Just start. And se where it takes you.

And do that. Every day. Dont concentrate on the end. Concentrate on where you are.


All that we get in this life is this moment.
Right now.

Only this. Thats the only guarantee we possess.

Your only obligation to yourself is to be as happy as you can. In this moment.

If the thibgs you are doing... if the path younare on.. isnt fulfilling you in this moment. Ask yourself... what would?

Its ok to change course. To try new things.
And to give yourself permissiom to jist be happy. Right now. Today.

>>18429702
Yeah youre right. While i was waiting for your response i remembered i wanted to be a buddhist monk and i told myself i should just limit interactions with other people since its fucking with my health. It would be beneficial to be a lay monk.

>>18429699
Its not up to other people what makes you happy in life. See the advice i just offered to the last post. You have this moment to live. Thats it. Make the most of it. Whatever makes you happy is inherently good. Its your life.

But my advice is to explore withom yourself WHY this fiction is making you happy. Why it is this is what you have chosen.

You cannot make a decision without being sure about your motivation.

It sounds to me like you are idealizing an imaginary character because life is messy. And imperfect. And hard. And often painful.

And if it is because you fear those things.. fear that you wont be good enough for something 'real'.. or they not enough for you...i would urge you to explore those things. And be brave enoigh to overcome them.

If something real is what would in fact make you happiest.

Dont make a decision because of how other people think. Or react.

But be true to yourself. And what your innermost needs truly are.

And then work. Moment by moment. To get those things for yourself.

>>18429713
There is much wisdom to be found in solitude.

Consider taking a silent retreat. There are many available. It can be for a few days to a few months. I think something like that might benefit you tremendously.

>>18429710
I don't know if I can be happy.