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I am the most boring person in existence

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I have spent the last five years toiling away in school. I got a chemical engineering degree and I don't currently have a job, aside from tutoring part time. I spend all of my time in school studying, except towards the end when my soul and dreams were crushed when I just regressed into wasting my time on the internet like I did in high school.

I am currently living with my dad. I have a car. I have been using dating sites because I have too much time and I am bored.
I have been on two dates so far. They were coffee dates and awkward because I am a really boring person. The first one, lasted three hours and we both desperately wanted to connect and find something to talk about anything. I felt like I got put in a trance because she was talking so much . I apologized to her when I got home and she texted me back saying she had enjoyed talking to me. I think it was clear to both of us that we didn't form a connection.
The second one, was with someone who was really enthusiastic to meet. I wasn't, but I had free time so I just met up with them anyways just for practice.

In college I wasn't able to connect with anyone because I don't do anything interesting. I never got to know anyone in group projects. I am an extremely defensive person and I suck at conversation, likely due to lack of practice. I just always destroy the topic of the conversation by steering it in the wrong direction. I tend to isolate myself and it was not uncommon to spend a whole weekend without having a conversation with another person.

I messaged a girl last night and she gave me her number and told me to set something up. I haven't yet. I am willing to do another coffee date, but the last two didn't go well, since I am so boring.

>The point
how do I hide my lack of personality from my date? What is the best thing to talk about considering I have no friends and haven't done anything exciting or interesting in the last five years?
>>
Think you should get rid of the idea that you're not interesting
You know tons of stuff and might even have a few hobbies or favorite shows? Go into the date trying to be yourself and if it works, so be it.
>>
Learn. There's thousands of years of history, brutal, beautiful, incredible history to talk about. You were actually born yesterday, compared to the incredible richness of stories and topics that have literally never been easier in human history to find.
Learn about 16th century shipmaking. Learn about traditional Indonesian instruments. Learn about the father of the impressionists. Read Moby Dick. Read White Fang. Read the karma sutra.
Go to the beach/park/mountains/on a drive/whiskey tasting/fishing/to renaissance fairs/glass blowing classes/abandoned buildings by yourself, for no reason other than to enjoy and learn. If you don't do cool things, GO DO THEM. That's it there's no codeword (although most urban exploration communities have to know you for a while before they open up about places) to go do interesting things.
If you meet somebody at pottery class or a rodeo or flying stunt kites at the beach, there's an excellent chance that's something they usually do and that makes them a more interesting person. If you meet them online, or at a shitty dive bar, that's what they probably do a lot and they're as boring as you are now.
Learn about everything you can. Take up hobbies, and not to impress somebody specifically, on your own, now. Practice speaking and do fun things.
Being interesting isnt like hair color, you arent "born with it or not". You don't hide lack of personality. You go fucking get one. Do what you enjoy and what makes you better until you find someone else doing similar things and bang each other.
And wear a condom dumbass.
>>
>>18425903
Talk about what you find interesting, and I don't mean chemical engineering, I mean something that she could relate to emotionally that excites you.

Sometimes it doesn't even matter what it is that you're talking about as long as it makes you excited. If she likes you, she'll follow suit.

If no matter what you get excited about, she doesn't seem interested, then it's probably not that you're not interesting, it's more that she just isn't in to you.

Hopefully you get the former and not the latter. Good luck!
>>
>>18425938
My major is boring af. I can explain to you why air conditioning is always too cold, but aside from that I don't know that much.

I am afraid of talking about TV shows that I watch, and I tend to just watch documentaries. >>18425950
Nothing really excites me anymore.

>>18425944
I think you have it right. I need to read more and I need to stop wasting my life on the internet. It is so comfortable here, though...
>>
>>18425972
Well, if nothing really excites you, then nothing will help. >>18425944 has it right in the sense that you need to broaden your horizons and spice up your life, but if you find these things boring or uninspiring then it will only be a matter of time before you bounce back to who you are now. That said though, follow his advice. Who knows, maybe something in there could be the jolt you need to change your life.

Best of luck!
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>>18426015
Is there anything I can do in the short term to be more interesting for a date? Should I just read a lot between then and now? What will make me better at conversation?
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Everyone's boring. Some people hide and pretend better than others, but if you sit down and observe others, most people's lives boil down to a pissing contest on who is the least boring. You're asking how to pretend, too, which makes me believe you damn well know there's nothing you can change about it. What you CAN change is accepting who you are and not giving into this bullshit trope.
>>
>>18425903
Find a hot science nerd so the two of you can geek out together about black holes....
>>
>>18426089
Two things: 1) Rather than being more interesting, it may be worth it to be more fun. Many people who date focus on being playful and entertaining. As far as how to do that, think about how a parent treats their little girls in the fun, entertaining sense. To an adult woman, a somewhat refined version of this is what's considered charming. 2) As far as being better at conversations, it's not so much about you as it is about them. Dating is more of an interview process not just for them but for you as well. You're both trying to figure out if the other is the right one for you, and a criteria for you would be to find someone who has interests similar to your own. With this person then, it wouldn't be about holding a conversation as much as just talking to them. Otherwise to spruce yourself up, gonna have to go back to >>18425944: Read. A lot. Do stuff. A lot of stuff. You will naturally pick out the interesting tidbits on your own and will be able to use those as conversation pieces later. Again though, if you don't find ANY of it interesting, then you'll forget most of it, so this more or less depends on you.

Again, best of luck!
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