So there's this girl /adv/....

You can't do anything until you sort your life out, m8. really. Your intuition is right. You need to sort yourself out or you're not going to be anything but a burden on anyone around you. It's cliche, but you need to get a job (some form of income) and balance your expenses. Make a budget.

The basics, man. You need a foundation.

>>18424734
Either give up because you know you cant satisfy her needs, or tell her the truth and see if she wants to ride it out.

All women are literally prostitutes.

A girlfriend or wife is just another form of prostitute.

No woman will start dating a broke NEET, it doesn't matter what you look like.

You simply can't afford a girlfriend.

>>18424739

I've applied all over the place but since I ran out of money for my phone I don't know if any of them have tried to contact me, I'm going to have to borrow money from my dad. My only shot at income at this point is to keep applying and hope that one of these places will let me be their dishwasher and do that until I can go to school the next semester. I'm on that GI Bill so I'll get some money for going to school, still I've been down in the dumps about the whole thing.

>>18424734
This is where the park and a jug of lemonade come in handy. Frugal dating means creative dating, if she's worth it, she'll like your thoughtfulness and money won't matter until things are looking more serious down the road. Hopefully you'll be able to get your shit together in that time.

>>18424746
That's bullshit son. Doing something for an emotional feeling of well-being, is far different from doing something for just money.

In one scenario, you form normal healthy bonds, in another you destroy and debase yourself for profit..

>>18424739
By some cosmic miracle I came to this board to ask the same question. Surely, a guy needs to have some income to have any chance at a serious relationship. Can you help me with this question: "Is a serious relationship with marriage as the final goal possible for someone earning minimum wage at the age of 25. A confirmed loser all-around."

How can increase my marketability in ways other than making more money? (I've got the physical fitness part covered.)

>>18424763
You can do both at the same time.

All heterosexual relationships start off as prostitution, and they often end when that stops (i.e. the guy loses his job).

>>18424765
It's possible, but dude, make no mistake, that it's a competition among the males for the best females, and among the females for the best males. Make no mistake. So, don't expect to date Scarlett Johansen or anything, but it's certainly entirely feasible for you to find some other less desirable person.

Honestly, not hating, or whatever, but really, it really is a competition. Not even a cold war, like straight up real competition. Terrorism, undermining, outright warfare, even, lol

>>18424780
That's a retarded rationalization for being or buying prostitutes. It's nothing like that, and if your relationships ARE like that, it says more about you personally than anything else about people in general.

>>18424802
I've gotcha. Same rules as everything in life. It's either taking it easy or possessing something. You can't have your cake and eat it too.

Op here, so the consensus seems to be that I should wait till I sort my self out, so should I just keep it platonic with the girl or should I let her know I'm a NEET piece of shit even though I would love to ask her out?

>>18424746 Don't listen to this guy he's obviously never experienced true love. My current girlfriend got with me a year ago when I had no car, no job, and I was addicted to pain pills. I was also (and still kind of am) a complete stoner. And I mean the kind of stoner that smokes 3-4 blunts a day at least and can't detach his lazy ass self from the playstation. She met me when I was at my worst be we fell in love regaurdless. Now one year later here we are with a beatiful baby boy, a car, and our own apartment. I even start a new job making better money next week. Don't let your situation define the feelings you have for someone. If you really like her, you will take a shot and give it your best. Who knows maybe you'll both come out on top by bettering each other.

As one of my more matured friends likes to put it, "no money, no honey." No kidding, I've gotten similar advices from him and a few other people (thank goodness for a social life) because I've been in the exact situation as yours! Well, almost.

I can try and soften the blow for you, but reality is reality, so I think it's better to give it to you straight. Like many others have said it on here, all heterosexual relationships are at their core just a competition to find the best partners for producing and raising the best offsprings. That's all there is to it, so if you still have any ideas about some idealistic relationship straight out of a fairly tale, it's best to do a reality check every now and then.

Now, I'm pretty sure you're tired of hearing the same stuff from everyone. Taking that red pill will take time, but in the mean time you can see this as an opportunity for some new experiences that will help you grow. Here's a tip: try not to see her as the One, as she most likely won't be. There will be many women in your life, and though you might really want it to work this one time, that is unlikely to happen. Still not a reason to give it up, though, please try your best despite knowing the probability for success isn't high. Essentially what I'm telling you to do is to expect the worst and aim for the best at the same time.

[cont.]

>>18424996
[cont.]

With that out of the way, here's some useful tips you can try. Firstly, well, not exactly a tip but keep in mind that money isn't the only factor that makes a man attractive to a woman. "Chicks dig confidence," and a lot of other things related to it, so just be confident, and be yourself. Secondly, you know what else makes a person attractive? Their happiness. If you know how to take care of yourself and be happy by yourself, people will naturally be drawn to you. Two birds with one stone: Make serious attempts (emphasis on the plural, as you might have to do this over and over before you can see the changes) to get your life together. Focus more on finding work and less on the girl, but let her know that you have a clear and strong interest in her, and that you are not in a position for dating normally. If she's hopefully worth it, she'll be cool with dating "frugally" (see
>>18424754). You'll need to hurry up and get your shit together in that time, though. She might be cool with it for a while if you're cool enough for her, but understand that nobody wants to date a broke cunt forever.

>>18424998
I'm working on getting on my feet, right now I'm just dealing with the fact that I completely failed at trying to be independent. I got so depressed that all I'd do was stay in my room, get stoned and listen to the Deftones all day. I must apply at 4 different places in my city and follow up (be a pain in their ass) frequently, I even signed up for a spot to work picking fruit in the field but so far nothing. I don't know if it matter but I think I should mention that I've never been in a relationship before, this would be my first one.

>>18424966
Guy who wrote the lengthy responses above here, that was the general outline but here I'll try to answer your specific questions.

It seems you don't have much experience with dating, so I'll point out some of what you should and shouldn't do.
First, you don't necessarily have to tell her that you're a NEET, because first of all that'll likely make it awkward (the problem isn't that you're a NEET, the problem is that, everyone has their share of problems, and nobody would appreciate someone shoving their problems in their faces. It shows your insecurity and nothing else. Put yourself in their shoes and you'll understand: how are you expected to react when someone not very close suddenly tells you about one of their biggest life problems?). I'm not telling you to hide it either (and please don't try to hide it), but know that it isn't something you flaunt about.

Should you keep it platonic? No. You have an interest in her, and if you don't want to friend zone yourself (believe or not it's more often than not the spineless attitude of the guys that friendzones themselves than the girls doing it), I'd advise you to show it, and show it early on. Let her know your intentions, loud and clear, okay maybe not in words, try to be subtle if you can, but let her know clearly that you intend to date her, not just be friends.

Ask me anything specifics and I can guide you towards the light. J/k, but if you have anything you'd like to know, go ahead, as I won't be going to sleep for a while.

>>18424734
Advice: stop fucking meeting women in church you faggot!!! Are you stupid or what?! Those bitches are crazy as fuck!!!!

>>18425031
>I'd advise you to show it, and show it early on. Let her know your intentions, loud and clear, okay maybe not in words

How do I do that?

>>18425011
Same guy here. My earlier response was to your previous one, I didn't see this one whilst typing that.

In response to this:
Don't worry too much, I can tell that you're making steady progress. I can see that you are insecure and uncertain about the future, but one tip I can give you is to always expect the worst (it is harder than it sounds to do this, but when done right it will have very profound impacts on your mentality), so that every time you fail at something, it's still within your expectations. Believe me when I say you'll need this, as you'll have to try again and again. It's a very gradual progress, and any level of success, be it gaining a stable income or anything else, doesn't happen overnight.

Way I see it, you're already trying hard and have gained some experiences. That's good enough for now, so keep trying and don't worry too much about what you can control. It gets easier once you figure out how to be keep being productive one way or another.

One thing I'm curious about, is there anything that you really enjoy doing aside from indoor activities? Changing your habits is hard, but not impossible; and redirecting your motivations towards social life and work and bettering yourself in general will help lots with your depression.

>>18425050
I can't really tell you what to do unless you let me know more about your personality (I can guess more or less, but I still need the specifics) and how you normally operate around women.

The point isn't what to do, but how you do it. And how one shows their interests towards the opposite gender depends a lot on their personality and the target of affection. How do you normally interact with her? With other people?

BTW, this guy >>18425032 is likely correct. All girls are crazy, just on different levels; religious girls are particularly crazy (which makes them easy to deal with in a way), but they are all fun in all sorts of particular ways. If you like her, you like her, so my advice is to go for it anyway, though I'm still curious, is she particularly religious?

>is there anything that you really enjoy doing aside from indoor activities?

I like to go hiking and hunting but since I moved back into my dads place I haven't gone, not because I was too depressed but because theres no where to hunt or hike around here. I'm a /k/ommando at heart, I own the guns and it really depresses me not to be able to buy ammo to go shoot them. Oh yea, I should've mentioned that I have an autistic interest in all things weaponry and military

>>18425068
>is she particularly religious?

not particularly but I kind of want a religious one, I was raised in the church and I want to go back to it after 4 years of debauchery and military life. The Christian life is just so much better than that for me, I'm still coming to terms with some of the things I did while Active Duty though.

>>18425070
There you go. You're quite interesting as far as I'm concerned. The thing is, you are probably not taking enough pride in your interests. (I know you like them enough for yourself, but be confident when showing it to other people is what makes you attractive.)

Hiking and hunting seem like fun activities. Do you often talk with her about your interests? How do you do it normally? Personally I enjoy talking about interests, and if I'm interested in the girl I throw in a few relationship jokes and hints every now and then. That's one of the way you can be subtle. Just don't shy away when you are trying to show interest, if you can't do it naturally then just do it your way, even being awkward at first is much better than being a coward. You'll learn to be better the more you do it, so don't worry too much about the mistakes or making a bad impression.

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>>18425083
You make it sound so easy, I suck at small talk and just bullshitting in general, I've always been on the silent side