I have a beard.

What's wrong with you, bro? This isn't even a thing. Trim your beard and mustache so you don't look like a hobo. You act like you either look like shit or you clean shave. Learn to manage your beard, damn.

Really, learn to take care of your beard, and mustache. You don't just let that shit grow anymore than you let your hair on your head grow without even getting a haircut. You have to maintain it and it's baffling that this hasn't occurred to you.

>>18418491
I hope you're not metrosexual, effeminate faggot.

How did you learn to trim beard? Haven't really done it before.

>>18418462
Ay I'm in the same boat. Been shaving since 8th grade. 24 now and full on beard. I hate grooming, though.

Here's what I do:
1) Trim the neckbeard. Basically start next to your ears, below your jaw. Follow the jawline. You'll need to experiment with how much you want to keep under your chin
2) Trim your mustache so it's out of your mouth. Just trim it so it's above your lips.

Just doing those two things (using a beard trimmer with no attachments) once a month will make you look so much better.

>>18418516
lol, dude, I learned because I don't like chewing on my fucking mustache when I eat, and I just took a pair of scissors and trimmed that shit as evenly and neatly as I could in a couple of snips, and the purpose was to keep that shit out of my mouth, but the sideeffect was that it actually looked great, and then I just did something similar with the beard and goatee and trimmed the wild hairs so it looks even.

Symmetry, dude. Symmetry. And don't take this the wrong way, but you sound like some kind of knuckledragger the way you're hung up on "effeminate metrosexual faggots" lol

>>18418462
>I know I look terrible.
Just trim it, man. But an electric trimmer. Use those small curved scissors for moustaches and details. Google how to find a good neckline so you don't shave too high up. It can always grow back so don't be scared to experiment with it a bit.

PS my Orthodox priest trims his beard, he keeps it pretty short

>>18418462
>I have to go to extreme lengths to convince people Im not gay.

the beard isn't your problem

>>18418462
older anon here. Have had a beard for 17+ years. I've had it short, stubble, long, lumberjack long, and finally settled on the groomed executive beard style. I had thought of going with a solid modern viking beard, but my work dictates that I look relatively well groomed.

Get yourself to a quality barber. Get a shave n a hair cut. Tip well. Drop between 40-50 bucks all together. Do this every 2 months while you maintain it at home using beard oil and a boar bristle brush. You'll be better off for it

>>18418462
>One one hand, I want to wear this brutal, middle ages style beard to oppose modern effeminate, metrosexual men and more importantly as Orthodox Christianity tradition.
>I look like shit and am self-conscious about it

Sorry you're not a "real" man op

>>18418462
Comb beard, trim it. Apply coconut oil, take cold showers, take Beardalizer supplements. Grow it long af.

>>18418462
>i have a beard
>waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

you're exactly like the cucks you're trying to destroy with your beard. take care of your beard. people don't magically have sick beards. you need to take care of them just like you take care of your hair. if you're not a pussy, you can manage to figure out how to have a nice beard. go buy a book on beard care. go look up "beard trimming tips" on google. just go fix it you stupid cuck.

it doesn't even make me mad that you're here asking for tips on your beard. what makes me mad is that you think you're better than the "metrosexual effeminate men" and you're here sobbing about your beard. cuck.

>>18419843

It's ok mate let it out, I felt the same when I could only grow a couple wispy pubes on my chin

>>18420648

hey i actually am jealous as fuck. i wish i could grow a magnificent beard. OP doesn't deserve the beard

>>18418516
>How did you learn to trim beard?
Youtube

>>18418462
Did you consider... trimming it? You'd still have the beard, only it wouldn't be a hobo beard

Buy clippers and hit the full beard with a number 8 then clean up the neck with a razor. Thank me later

>>18421779
And if you really wanna grow it out put coconut oil on it every other day for a couple months while hitting it with the 8 and you'll be able to tame it from there

>>18418462
Trim it, m8
The problem is not your beard itself or that it's big, but that it's unkempt