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I feel sad.
Years have gone by and I feel so powerless. Wherever I go, I just ruin relationships with people, I can't make friends, and the ones I do make usually hate me in the end. And so I suffer, greatly. I try to mask my pain, try to forget who I am, but I can never forget my history and my life. Every decision I've made has not worked out for me. I'm cursed with terrible luck.
I was born to fail and I have no place. I just want to end the suffering, the irony is that I have so much, but it fills me with so little joy. Deep down, I'm just ungrateful and foolish, it is my birthright. And I don't know what to do with myself. Everything I've tried fails.
Street Fighter 5: Ultra Bronze after many months
League of Legends: Bronze 5 for four years, still struggling.
Art: /mlp draw thread hates me, /ic /beg thread hates me, LAS /ic/ thread banned me from discord. I always hear the same complaints. Never improve, never get better, I'm a troll.
Writing: My Fimfiction account is middling, of 50 stories and they all were meh at best.
Yu-gi-oh: Always spend money on cards, the meta decks always destroy every single deck I make. No matter how much thought I put into it.
I'm just a failure at everything.
As you can guess, I'm a fan of horses and
I'm basically Chris-chan tier and I'm always told that I was a troll. But, I don't know what to do, I don't know how to stop being a troll. I don't know how to not be called a troll. Everything I do is just wallowing in despair as I go forward, trying to find some kind of relevance in my existence. And as much as I work hard, I just never attain that satisfaction I need. The success I crave till my dying breath.
I just want it to end. I'm so tired of my existence. I guess this is a blog post, but I have nowhere else to turn to. And I literally don't know what to do.
I'm too scared to try other things because I feel like I'll just fail like all the other things.
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Sounds like you dont turn mistakes into lessons, op
You dont have the right to cry about failure until youve done everything you could to succeed
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>>18410034
>don't turn mistakes into lessons
I guess I'm physically incapable to do this. Either that or my brain is just incredibly stubborn. In all honesty, I don't know what to do. I have no idea on what course I should take.
Maybe I should take a class or something on how to change my life?
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>>18410034
Okay, I just got a click in my head. It all makes sense now. The reason I lose so much is because I'm not using the best tools for the job, I should be using the most strongest stuff to help me move forward. I used to think that using weaker tools would make you stronger against adversity, but maybe I just need to use better tools instead.
Maybe I really am not trying hard enough or maybe I'm just not using the proper things to win.
I must be banging my head against the wall without changing my strategy.
Right?
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>>>18410075
Thats exactly what im saying
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>>18410085
okay, I just need to focus on that and not forget. because I usually have a kinda short memory. Nothing too major that would constitute as a disease, but I am forgetful.
Other than that, Thank you, I just might be able to change my life if I just focus on that really well.
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>>18410018
Play this on repeat everyday, curl up into a ball and cry.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kPz21cDK7dg
Trust me, it feels really good.
Also start doing drugs. Then you will realize how awesome life is.
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>>18410018
>years have gone by
>can't make relationships
>MLP
>Yu-Gi-Oh
>Fanfictions
>Fighting games
>MOBA games
Ohhhhhhhhhhh boy.
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>>18410018
>are u me?
Seriously anon. Pretty much 100% me
Bout ate a shotgun a few weeks ago and go out on meds.
Now im a zombie.
Dont give up anon. At the very least yoy have fellow edgelord shitposters in the oit of despair with u. Drop a fake email or fb and i can add u to our shitposting group
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>>18410257
link 2 fb?
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