?

You mentioned traumatic events and abuse having effects on your daily life, I'd suggest to go counseling, try session with mental health specialist first, but don't take the pills if it's not really necessary.

Appreciate more art in huge varieties, and eventually you become a unique work of art in life. What would you like to be more passionate about?

Can you give examples of the bad habits?

> How do I become a happy person who's full of life and soul?

https://youtu.be/LO1mTELoj6o

This is a good start (Interpret with reverse psychology, if that does not become clear)

Don't think that everything was wasted getting to this point. It might not have been the way it should've or would've if you had liked, but it was necessary for you to understand what you want.

What did you gain by those years you think you wasted? A deeper knowledge about yourself and what you want to have a better life.

>>18383702
Working on that. The problem is that It'll probably have to wait until next fall to sign on with a therapist. Found a good one that'll be paid for by the school.

>>18383716
Hm. More passionate/excited about
>the moment
>other people (as you've all have probably guessed I'm shit at connecting with others and this only adds another few layers into the crusty mutant onion of my problems)
>my life and my potential work in general...(usually I live as if I don't have a future)

>bad habits
Oh boy.
>living an unscheduled life; really wouldn't be a problem if I was one of those manic pixie girls who magically seem to do amazing things based off their whims...but nah, I sit around, waste time, always thinking there's plenty more to burn when there truly isn't
>bad sleep habits (which is pretty regular)
>projecting my mental state onto the world...kind of like painting the world gray
>assuming the worst because of trust issues
>beating myself up (looks, intelligence, past transgressions, etc.)

>>18383679
Get a hobby you actually care about.

Have you considered meditation?

Read "Happiness" by Matthieu Ricard.

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15KB, 200x200px

Therapy, a bf/gf and a better outlook on life Nanashi.

Why worry about time wasted? You're doing what you're happy with now so focus on that. It's idiotic to dwell on the past when the present is clearly better.

>>18383758
And now let's look at some specific problems. Identifying them is good, but now you need to make a plan and stick to it. If you get lazy then upset you only have yourself to blame.

>unscheduled life
Go make a schedule. Start by identifying things that you need to do. If you need to spend 3 hours studying then spend 3 hours studying. Draw up the schedule then STICK TO IT.

>bad sleep
Set a good time to go to bed and wake up. Around an hour before bed don't use electronic devices with bright screens. No phone, no pc, etc. Try tiring yourself out so you fall asleep quicker. Put your alarm somewhere that forces you to get up. The moment you hear it you need to get out of bed even if you feel like shit. Don't stop and think just go.

The other stuff is more of a therapy thing but I'll say this much, you must force yourself to look forward. You cannot be consumed by the past. The moment you start thinking about the past distract yourself. Go talk to someone, cook something, watch tv whatever.