Ex dreamt of good sex with me

>>18377315
To go a little more in detail, we started off a few months after she broke up with her ex. She was pretty much raped by my "best friend" and then we broke up once and she fucked her ex the day after, then got back with me in a few days. Really hurt me and made it hard for me to be strong and confident in the relationship, I didn't react to shit well during this and after we broke up, I think she lost respect and came to see me as less of a man. And my dick is too big for her, frequently causes pain when we fuck. So there are a few factors at play.
She's an emotional mess and younger/less mature than me but I love her and I want her back. At the very least I want to get back in her guts, she's the best piece of ass I've ever had. I was really scared she was gonna fuck or date some of the scumbags that have been flocking to her but even though she said she wanted to or might, she never did. She hasn't fucked anyone since I last laid her in march. She's horny as hell. But she isn't emotionally ready for sex after all this shit happened, she cries during or after sex since being used and lied to by people. If I flirt with her she sometimes rolls with it but usually blocks my advances or gets mad. But she appreciates the attention and ik she secretly takes comfort in my intense sexual attraction to her and my intense feelings for her. She calls me a rebound but I think she's just honestly tying all the negative shit that happened through our relationship to me and can't own up to her mistakes. And much of our relationship is a blur to her because she was addicted to xanax, just recently got totally clean.

>>18377315
Please someone throw their $0.02 in here, I am really broken up over this girl and I feel like I have a chance to reel her back in, make her feel taken care of, satisfied sexually and loved. I want to spark the feelings she initially had (says she was feeling that way because of loneliness and her situation or that she was lying to herself, but she's admitted she had a crush on me prior to me making advances), but I've tried for so long in such unsubtle ways I don't want to fuck it up. Up to this point I thought of it as a long term waiting game.

So you love her and you want to do everything you can for her?

Be there for her and comfort her. Don't confuse this with flirting.

Don't be surprised when she starts fucking other guys even when you helped her tho.

>>18377394
>Please someone throw their $0.02 in here
I think you should cut contact with her and move on. All staying emotionally involved with her is doing is wasting your time and mental energy when you can be working on your life and pursuing better girls. If she dumped you because she lost attraction before, even if she got back with you she would likely do it again and continue the habit of leaning on exes for comfort and sexual gratification. Who wants to be with someone who keeps other guys on the shelf? Who wants to be with someone who won't fully and whole-heartedly commit?

I recently had a situation where I was dealing with a woman I really really liked, but she refused to even commit to a relationship. She just wanted to fuck and do all the boyfriendy type things while staying free to fuck with other guys. Even though I think about that pussy every day and every night I ultimately decided I'd rather jack it for a while and hold out for someone who will actually be fully into me than be used like that. It hurt like a bitch for a little while but the sun is slowly coming out and I'm regaining hope.

>>18377421
Seeing your post makes me realize that I still have a long way to go about giving advice

>>18377404
I won't be surprised, I'll be crushed. This has been my plan and I'm semi-ready (not really, love her and need her in my life, but ik what I need) to disconnect from her if she starts something with someone else.
I am there for her even when she is talking about feelings for her ex or budding feelings for a scumbag, I try not to be noticeably jealous, etc... I am her support system and I show my love however I can, in ways she wants and ways she doesn't. I don't wanna just accept the friendzone, I want her to know that I honestly can't do that. Have told her time and time again I can't get over her and that she will always be more than a friend to me, that I will always hope we can get back together and that I will always aim to be the special person in her life again. Which she doesn't appreciate but whatever. Sometimes she can appreciate it when she is down and feeling bad about herself, but generally it pisses her off (immature).
I flirt and I am a support system for her. Her happiness comes before mine but I cannot stick around when she does really move on.

>>18377421
I mean I know I should, but I think I'll take the chance. She doesn't have anyone on the shelf now. I guess I'm the closest to being on the shelf desu. The ex had wronged her many times during and especially after the relationship, they stopped talking shortly after the last time they had sex. She was also on 18 mg of xanax when that happened, so bear that in mind.
This is really painful for me but I'm learning finally how to at least kinda deal with it and I can't give up on hope. I've been with a few girls but this one is special. Early on my feelings came super fucking strong and I've never felt real love for a female before, just liked them and felt lust. This is real. And we click. I think the baggage she carries just got somehow tacked onto me because she can't handle it herself.

>>18377455
Good luck anon. I see much heartache and wasted time in your future but I've been there and sometimes only experience can teach you what other people's wisdom won't.

>>18377486
Yeah, I've already been through a fucking lot. Lost my best friend, she has problems with my family so I suffered there, she has been pretty shitty at many times to me, the ex thing hurt, the flirting and yearning hurts, my own longing for her unfulfilled hurts. It all hurts. But I can't get myself to give up and take the L.
I appreciate the advice, but I was really looking for advice for finessing her back, maybe starting in a sexual manner with emotional undertones, so I can get her back. If anyone has ever finessed back an ex after a fucked breakup where she lost interest, I'd love to hear about it. Or if anyone has just unqualified advice toward that goal that's appreciated too.

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>/adv/ when I have an important question or concern
Damn guys no one gonna directly respond to my question?

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>>18377315
Bumping because I want answers

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Why does it feel like these fucking posts come up all day long.
>"will she take me back omg?"
>"maybe I do a certain thing the love she had for me will just automatically trigger"
>"wait, so you're saying there are thousands of other girls out there? I don't believe you!"

No drugs excuse the fact that she fucks her ex the day after """breaking up with you""" then comes straight back, soft little man you are.

Here's the truth, she will never, I repeat never, build up the attraction again, imagine this in 5 years when you've been dragged around for another 1-2 years and look back at all the time you wasted. She doesn't have her priorities / doesn't respect you if she simply went back to her ex like that.

The dreams don't mean anything, you're trying to hold onto something that isn't there. Dreams barely mean anything. I remember having the same blinders on as you as well, newflash - it doesn't get better.

The only responses you will be getting are people telling you to get the fuck out of there. Is this what you wanted? You even know it deep down, go with your gut, hit the gym and disappear from this emotional mess.

>>18377651
>"wait, so you're saying there are thousands of other girls out there? I don't believe you!"
I do believe that and I know if I disconnect the feelings will subdue and I will be able to find someone else, but I don't want to. I want her no matter what and that's my first priority.
I've been able to finesse the feelings back before. I just need at least some form of sexual intimacy with her if I can't have her back.
I know it was fucked of her to go back to her ex. But I knew I was getting into something with someone still not over her ex and all fucked up emotionally (daddy issues, anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, anger issues, immaturity, etc...), so I can't even blame her I feel.

>>18377580
Stop being such a fucking idiot.

People have already responded, and this isn't the first time you've posted about this here.

THERE IS NO WAY TO FORCE SOMEONE TO LOVE YOU OR TO WANT TO BE WITH YOU.

>>18377661
Nah, my gut tells me to do that if she gets with someone else. Even then another part of my gut will tell me I can't really leave.
NO ONE has ever come back from a fucked relationship and fixed shit?

>>18377678
I know, but I don't think it's game over. She is still growing emotionally and healing, I want to stay in her life and show her she was wrong, I want to finesse her back. I KNOW that has been done before.

>>18377686
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz I really don't want to respond to you. Run away from the damaged goods.

No "finessing" involved, I provided the most logical argument it's just up to you to move on now, the ball is in your court.

You have a whole life ahead of you, honestly wouldn't sweat it man.

>>18377315
>Ex dreamt of good sex with me
lol that's probably the only good sex she had with you.

>>18377695
Not true, she would get hurt because my dick was too big and she is small, but we did have good sex. And I always make sure she is satisfied if we have to stop because of the pain, my oral game is on a bean.