wanting to be the best EVERYTHING to boyfriend

>>18349301
That sounds kind of sweet, I wish I could find a girlfriend like you.

>>18349301
While your intentions are very good and sweet, is greentext your current bf? Just to clarify. I'll make a response to the question depending on the answer to that one.

>>18349334
Yes, he is. We met on a dating app. When I asked him why he was using it he said it was because everybody he knew came from the same circle of friends. (later I found out some girls jumped and swapped cocks inside that group)

>>18349301
Okay so. Male perspective. I had a super compatible LDR gf in 2008. We only met once in person. My first very serious, crazy in love relationship and I wanted to marry her. Problem is, I was an emotionally fucked kid who lived at home with his mom at 22 and her boyfriend who tried molesting me as a kid, and she knew what he had done at this point and still remained with him. Needless to say, this girl I met was the greatest thing that ever happened to me and I was so greatful. We lost our virginity to one another, she was 17, I was 22. She was a little taller than me, and I didn't care, I was crazy in love. Months go by, I start noticing changes in her demeanor, her mom told her something about not seeing me eventually, but our "relationship" was all through skype. She slowly began making less and less contact. And I was dying inside slowly. She tries dumping me on my birthday, fails, dumps me two days later. 2 years of extreme depression go by, I meet a girl who lives nearby online, we became friends and no more, she gave me oral, I felt guilty, disgusted with myself, I basically felt like I was having a nervous breakdown. We tried again a year or so later and the same shit happened. I wanted so desperately to forget my ex, move on, not be so "hung up" on the past, stop being so clingy etc, that I just hurt myself, and even hurt her in so doing. She wasn't even my gf, just a girl I thought was nice, but it fucked me up inside anyway. I tried everything to save it with this girl though, I told her eventually we'd try to be a couple, I just wasn't mentally stable, and she was younger then so it added to my self disgust. I used to tell her about how much I loved my ex. Granted, she herself wasn't a gf, but she wanted to be. And I could see how that would hurt her..

cont.

>>18349359
cont.

Meh. By the time I felt emotionally stable enough to start something serious with said girl, she goes off and tries fucking some guy she never told me about. Then tells me over the phone like it's totally okay. So I tell her I'm happy for her, in a way, I was.. in another I felt absolutely cucked. We didn't speak much since.

Sometimes things aren't as transparent as they seem. Long after the girl I lost my v to dumped me, I was in a state of extreme depression. 5 years later I took meds to deal with the insanity. It was the only way I managed to gain clarity. I was screaming at walls basically.

>>18349342
Yeah no sweetie that's fishy as shit. He is dating you he should not be on a dating site and he most certainly should not be creeping his ex and other women. My advice is to tell him to knock it off or get out. Sorry but your efforts to be a better gf are wasted on people who do that.

As for actually being a better gf:
1. Listen to what he has to say. Not to say you should let him run you over but listen to him and respond in kind.
2. Loyalty honesty and trust. Without all three youre fucked. Both partners need to be loyal to the other. Both need to be honest about everything, even the tiniest white lies tend to gnaw at the relationships foundation. Trust is even more necessary. Constantly being paranoid about the partner youre with will hurt in the long run. They will trust you less for it and will push further away.
3. Respect is a must. He must acknowledge and respect your opinions and you his. Relationships are a mutual give and take one person demanding more will lead to a fracture.

We met from the dating site, I didn't say he is still using it.

>>18349428
Well scratch that then. Point still stands that him creeping women is a bit off putting. Have you asked why he does that?

>>18349370
>>18349428
Also I don't know where you get it from that he is creeping on other women. I was creeping on their profile.

I agree with your advice on being a better partner and I'm already doing those things. The thing I have problems with is trust and maybe honesty because of the thoughts I have about other girls are messed up. I have imagined getting in fights with them and beating them up.

>>18349450
You are going down the road of a crazy person. You are not some cute, yandere stereotype. You're creepy and abusive. The best thing for you to do is to leave him and go on a journey of self-discovery for a while, where you are not dependent on the desires of others.

>>18349450
Alright I misread that. And please dear calm down. Now that I'm not misreading he sounds fine and female friends are absolutely okay as long as they aren't trying to hook or something.
Trust and honesty are needed and you can't run without them. You don't need to trust the women he knows you aren't dating them. Trust him to not think with his dick and try something out of line. He sounds honest with you so that's fine. Really I can relate I'm super territorial when it comes to my gf and now know that she can have friends and speak to them whenever because I trust her not to do anything stupid.
I can also relate to your last relationship. Ive been cheated on five times and it hurts worse each time. You can improve and be a better gf but in the end the decision to cheat isn't because of you its because of the guy who cant keep it in his pants and remain faithful to his partner.

>>18349301
Pls be in the US and pls marry me.

>>18349466
Don't listen to this normie fuck. Yandere is love yandere is life.

>>18349767
I am in a somewhat similar position to OP and I agree with them at least somewhat. My obsessiveness is hurting the relationship, I'm just glad we talked it through instead of breaking up. It came very close a few times. It is very important not to depend on people for your mental wellness. You have to take care of yourself and make sure being in a relationship isn't hindering you from growing, they aren't safety blankets.

>>18349773
I disagree with you. Obsessive love is pure and people who have issues with it ARENT worth that level of love.

It's not a safety blanket. It's entrusting your very soul to the other person and wanting them to do the same and there's nothing wrong with that. It's love the purest form of love.

>tfw no yandere gf

>>18349788
Trust me, this is my ideal situation, but it's not healthy. The relationship might be the only good thing in your life, and anchor you down, but it can't be a crutch for being emotionally withdrawn and cold to everyone else. I really, REALLY dislike most people and have trouble having sympathy for them, but I can't let them have so much power over me that I lose faith in someone who really has shown they love me and knows what it's like to be hurt.

>>18349301
@OP
To put this simply, the best way to sort this out is to talk to your bf. Just say something to him. Tell him that comparing you to his ex's and stalking and obsessing over other girls bothers you. Ask him why he does what he does. Otherwise, if it's really bothering you, you should just leave him. Find someone who values you for who you are, not how you are compared to others. If your bf can't value you for who you are, then they aren't really worth your time.

>>18349301
>I want these feelings to stop.

I think what would help you a lot is to talk to someone about your feelings, so in one word: therapy. My own problems are different from yours, but I've found that having someone to talk to who knows what questions to ask is really helpful in both reducing some feelings and learning how to cope with them better. See if you can find some place that offers couples counseling in your area.

>>18349825
Dude, do you even english? OP is stalking her BF's exes and stuff.